Chapter Six

 

 

Tess smoothed a hand down the front of her coral-colored, knee-length dress and took a breath before pushing the doorbell. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d had butterflies before a date—maybe a few in the beginning of her one and only relationship since her husband died—but they were fluttering like crazy in the pit of her stomach right now. Reid had promised to pick her up, but things had gone late with her last meeting so she’d texted and told him she would take a cab over.

Reid pulled the door open a moment later, wearing jeans and a deep blue shirt that matched his eyes, and gave her a slow smile that made her heart do a slow somersault. “Hi.”

“Hi.” She thrust the bottle of wine at him, mentally muting the whisper of uncertainty in her brain that wouldn’t shut up. What are you doing? Do you even know what you’re doing? You think getting involved with another man whose job puts his life in danger all the time is a good idea?

Okay, no to that last part. But what was she doing? She was living for a change, rather than just existing. That kiss had left her body aching and restless. Reid had woken something inside her, made her feel alive and attractive in a way she hadn’t in a damn long time, and she refused to spoil this by overthinking it.

While staring at the ceiling last night, yearning for the weight and heat of that strong body atop hers, she’d made up her mind to simply go with this and see what happened. It wasn’t like they were going to get serious—she was only here for another day, and she was based over a thousand miles from him.

“I brought you this instead of flowers. But I confess it was for partially selfish reasons, since it’s my favorite kind.” A glass or two would shut that damn whisper up completely.

“Come on in and I’ll pour you a glass,” he said, stepping out of the way.

She slipped off her heels inside the door and followed him into the kitchen, breathing in the scent of something spicy and rich. “Do I smell Mexican?”

“You do,” he said, looking up from uncorking the wine. “Is that okay?”

“It’s great. What did you make?”

“Chicken enchiladas with roasted tomatillo sauce, and a black bean and vegetable salad.”

She lifted her eyebrows. “Wow. I was expecting steaks. Or maybe Hungry Man dinners.”

His boyish grin made her heart trip. “I looked up a recipe online. Hope it doesn’t suck.”

So cute, that he’d picked it out for her. “Anything that smells that good can’t suck.”

He handed her the glass of wine. “For the lady.”

“Thank you,” she murmured, warmth spreading into her cheeks from the way he looked at her. Like he was already thinking about what would happen after dinner, and she’d bet it involved more than just kissing. It was a lot different being alone with him, without Autumn to act as a buffer.

With a kitchen towel draped over one broad shoulder, he turned back to the ingredients he’d laid out on the counter.

“You’re not having any wine?” she asked. She knew she should have bought beer instead.

“No, I’m good with water,” he said, and she watched in amazement as he picked up a husked corn of cob with a pair of barbecue tongs and began roasting them on a grill pan on the stove.

“This feels so fancy,” she said, smiling as she sipped at her wine. And decadent. Other than her husband, who hadn’t liked being in the kitchen all that much, no man had ever cooked for her before.

“Like I said, it won’t be gourmet.” He looked back at her over his shoulder, those stunning, deep blue eyes locking on hers. “But I hope it’ll make an impression.”

Mission already accomplished. Her bare toes curled around the rung of the stool she sat on. Mouth dry, she took another sip of wine. “Can I help with anything?” she asked when he went back to roasting the corn.

“Nope. Almost done here. Tell me about your day.”

“Just some meetings with my bosses, and I met my new flight crew. They seem great. One of them’s former air force, and the rest are former army. What about you?”

“We had the day off, but I hit the gym with my buddy Kai this afternoon.”

Since his back was mostly to her she allowed herself to enjoy the view, drinking in his broad shoulders and the muscles stretching the fabric of the shirt, the way his jeans hugged his trim hips and hard butt. Yes, she could appreciate all the time and effort Reid must put into keeping his body in that kind of condition. “He’s the big one, right?”

One side of Reid’s mouth turned up. “Yeah. He tried to invite himself over for dinner tonight, but he would have eaten everything I had and still been looking for more so I told him forget it.”

“Then I’m glad he’s not here, because I’m starving.”

She hadn’t meant to make it into an innuendo, but when he looked over at her again, there was such heat smoldering in his eyes that it damn near made her stop breathing for a second. “Yeah? Good. I’m hungry too,” he said, his voice dropping an octave.

Oh my God. Could she even handle it if they wound up in bed together tonight? She wasn’t sure she’d survive it.

She sat there on her perch, greedily drinking in the sight of him moving so comfortably around his kitchen while he sliced the grilled corn kernels off the cob and mixed them with halved red grape tomatoes, diced avocado, black beans and whatever else he had in the salad bowl. Once he’d tossed it all together with the dressing he had mixed together in a glass measuring cup, he pulled a casserole dish out of the oven and sat it on the counter.

Tess leaned closer, inhaling deeply. “It smells delicious.” She couldn’t wait to eat it.

Wielding a spatula, he eyed her from next to the counter. “Just how hungry are you?”

Fifty-fifty chance he was talking about food. “I haven’t eaten since eleven this morning, so, pretty damn hungry.”

With a nod, he scooped out two steaming, golden brown enchiladas onto a plate and added a mound of the salad. “Let’s eat at the table,” he said, carrying her plate into the eating nook where he’d set the table and lit candles.

It felt romantic and intimate, and she couldn’t help but smile as she sat down. “This looks beautiful.”

“You’re the only woman besides Autumn to have ever eaten here, so I wanted it to be special.”

What did it signify, that she was the only woman he’d allowed into his inner sanctum, other than his daughter? She wasn’t likely to forget this anytime soon.

Once he was seated with his own plate, she raised her glass. “To surviving our recent deployment to Afghanistan.”

He smiled at her dark humor and tapped his water glass to her wineglass. “Cheers.”

“Mmmm, this is so good,” she said in between bites. How sexy was it, that a man as professionally accomplished as him could cook, too?

After dinner, she started to help him clear the table but he refused and refilled her wineglass before banishing her from the kitchen while he cleaned up. She sat on the leather couch opposite the TV and talked to him while looking around at the clean, uncluttered space as the anticipation about what might happen in a few minutes built inside her.

A few framed photos graced the mantel and side table. Mostly of him and Autumn at various stages of her life, including a recent one of them on their trip to Universal Studios. Autumn was atop Reid’s shoulders wearing a black robe and holding a wand proudly overhead, while Reid grinned up at her, hands securely locked around the front of her shins, his eyes hidden by a pair of dark sunglasses. It made Tess smile.

A few others of Reid and his teammates were scattered around as well. Then she spotted another photo on the mantel, and her heart squeezed. It had to be from his army days because Reid was wearing desert-pattern BDUs and clean-shaven, his arm around the shoulders of another soldier around his age.

Reid joined her a few minutes later with another glass of water. He sank down beside her, close but not touching her, and draped a casual arm along the back of the couch. “You could have turned on the TV,” he said.

“No, I’ve been looking at your photos. This one’s my favorite,” she said, pointing to the one of him and Autumn at Universal.

He grinned. “That was a great day. Worth every penny to see her face when we got to Hogwart’s Castle.”

“I’ll bet.” She paused to sip her wine, debating her next words, but finally decided just to say it. “Is that Jason?” she asked, nodding to the picture of him and the other soldier.

His smile slipped and he tensed a little. “Yeah. On our last tour in Afghanistan together.”

“Were you there when he died?” she asked gently.

His jaw clenched and he lowered his gaze to the water glass he held in his lap. “No. He didn’t die in combat.”

“In training?”

He shook his head. “Hanged himself a few months after we got home.”

“Oh, Reid…” She put a hand on his shoulder, feeling awful, the muscles rock hard beneath her palm. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked.”

“No, it’s okay.” He fidgeted with the water glass. “I knew he was in a bad place and tried to do what I could to pull him out of it. He promised me he’d get help.” He pulled in a deep breath. “I knew something was wrong that night. He wouldn’t answer his phone so I went over there. And I found him hanging in the shower.”

Oh, Jesus. “That’s terrible.”

He nodded. “I think the worst part was telling his wife. They’d been having problems and she was out of town staying with her mom when it happened. I drove all night to get there, and when she saw me at the door she started screaming.”

Tess couldn’t stand not being able to comfort him. She set her wine down and wrapped both arms around him, pressing her cheek to his shoulder. Relief and warmth spread through her when he curled an arm around her and tucked her into his side. “I’m so sorry that happened.”

“It was hard, not gonna lie.” He ran his fingers through the ends of her hair, the motion tender yet arousing, too. “I told you last night that I didn’t handle it well.”

She tipped her head back to look at him, sensing he was about to say something important.

He nodded at the glass in his hand. “You probably noticed I’ve been drinking water this whole time. And that’s because I had a drinking problem.”

The bluntness of the admission took her aback, but she also found it incredibly brave. “You did?”

He nodded once. “A bad one. Started drinking heavily after Jason died and everything kind of went into a downward spiral after that. I’ve been dry a long time now, thanks to Autumn coming along, but I can’t pretend it’s not still inside me.” He turned his head and met her gaze, and the bravery of that struck her deep inside. “So if you were wondering what happened with my marriage, that was a big part of it. That and me being gone a lot, starting from when I began trying out for FAST.”

There were always two sides to the story. “You seem to have done a good job at getting your life back together again.”

“So far so good, yeah.”

She rested her chin on his shoulder, admiring him for his honesty. “Thank you for telling me. Why did you, by the way?” He certainly hadn’t needed to. He could have kept it from her, but given enough time she would have wondered why he always abstained.

He avoided her gaze as he answered. “I wanted you to know what kind of man I am before things went any farther.”

So she could make up her mind whether he was worth the risk or not. He didn’t say the words, but they were clear anyway.

Tess slid her fingers into the back of his hair, caressed his scalp gently as she leaned in to nuzzle his cheek with the tip of her nose. “I think I’ve already seen enough about your character firsthand to have a pretty good idea of what kind of man you are,” she murmured against his stubble.

She’d seen him protecting his teammates during that harrowing extraction. Knew the stringent standards that FAST members had to maintain in order to make the teams. And she’d seen the love he had for his daughter. Those things, combined with him having just volunteered his deepest, darkest secret to her up front on his own without excuse or apology, told her he was worth the risk.

He turned his head to face her, surprise clear in the depths of his deep blue eyes. “And you still want to be here?”

The hint of vulnerability coming from such a strong man turned her heart to mush. His drinking may have been a huge contributing factor to the dissolution of his marriage, but the divorce had obviously hurt him deeply.

She smiled and leaned in to brush her lips across the corner of his mouth. “I absolutely do.” Whether it was smart or not, she couldn’t deny it.

His water glass thudded on the coffee table an instant before his hands slid into her hair and his mouth covered hers. She sighed and sank a hand into his hair, her other going to his shoulder to anchor herself. God, the way he kissed—a heated seduction of lips and tongue she had no prayer of resisting. Her head swam as he deepened the kiss, his tongue caressing hers.

The distinctive notes of the Harry Potter theme song broke through the fog in her mind.

Reid eased back, stared at her. A ringtone coming from his phone.

“Autumn?” she guessed, trying to clear her head. The man was lethal with his mouth.

He nodded, his eyes all smoky, his voice rough with desire. “I’ll call her back.”

Tess shook her head and put a hand in the center of his chest, pushing back. What if it was important? “No, answer it.”

With a low groan, Reid straightened and dug his phone out of his pocket. “Hey, baby girl. What’s up?”

Tess watched him as he talked, loving the alertness about him, how he gave Autumn his full attention even though he had to be fighting the effects of that smoldering kiss.

“Oh. Yeah. One second.” He held up a finger to Tess to say he’d be back in a minute and disappeared around the corner. She assumed it was to have privacy, but he didn’t lower his voice so she could still hear what he was saying. “Found it. You left it in your dresser drawer.” A pause. “What, tonight? Ah, honey, I… Hang on.”

He reappeared a second later, standing so tall and sexy on the other side of the room, one hand covering the bottom of the phone. “Autumn left her wand here and she needs it for a birthday party first thing in the morning.”

“Oh.” So their date was over, then.

With a soft chuckle, he uncovered the bottom of the phone. “Yeah, it’s Tess.” He raised his eyebrows at her. “I asked her over for dinner and we were about to have dessert.”

Oh yeah, she was craving more of that dessert right now.

His lips quirked at whatever Autumn said. “Yeah, I’ll ask her. Hang on.” He spoke to Tess. “She wants us to drop it off.”

He wanted her to come with him? “Sure, fine with me.”

He raised an eyebrow. “You sure? From here it’s a twenty-five-minute drive each way.”

“That’s okay.” Spending an hour alone in the car with him sounded good to her.

He lifted the phone back to his ear. “All right. We’ll be over in a while. But don’t make it a habit to leave things behind when you come over. I won’t always be able to drop everything and run it over to you.”

Whatever Autumn said in reply made Reid grin, and Tess was struck once again by how gorgeous he was when he smiled, the harsh edge to his features completely melting away. “Okay. We’ll leave now. Keep your eyes peeled for us.” He put his phone into his pocket and faced Tess. “You sure about this? It wasn’t how I’d planned the night to go.”

“It’s fine,” she said, already heading back to the kitchen to grab her purse. And probably for the best that they got out of his place for a while at least. Being alone with him here tempted her mercilessly, and this would give her a little more time to decide whether she was ready to sleep with him.

In the elevator on the way to the underground parking garage a minute later, an idea struck her. “How about we take Autumn out for dessert somewhere? A sundae or something.”

Reid glanced at her in surprise, then his expression shuttered and he seemed to hesitate.

“It was just an idea,” she said quickly, wishing she hadn’t opened her mouth. “Never mind.”

“It’s not…” He sighed as they stepped out of the elevator and started toward his Mustang. “I love the idea, but Sarah will never go for it.”

Tess frowned. “Why not? We would drop Autumn off right after.”

“But it wasn’t on the schedule,” he explained, frustration creeping into his tone. “If it’s not scheduled, she won’t allow it.”

Wouldn’t allow the father of her child to take Autumn out for an ice cream at eight o’clock on a Friday night, even when she was just sitting at home doing nothing? “Oh.”

He put her in the front passenger seat of the Mustang, then settled behind the wheel. As he was reaching to turn the key in the ignition, he paused. “Screw it. I’ll try.” He pulled out his phone and shot off a quick text before firing up the engine.

The radio came on low to a classic rock station. “This okay by you?” he asked.

“Yep.”

He slanted her a grin. “That didn’t sound convincing. Seriously, what do you like?”

“Country, but I don’t mind this.”

Without a word, he reached for the dash and switched it to a country station for her. The buzz of nerves inside her eased when the familiar strains of one of her favorite songs came on. “Better?” he asked in a wry tone.

She couldn’t help but smile. “Yes.”

“Top up, or down?”

“Down.”

He hit the button and waited for the convertible top to fold back before pulling out of his spot and steering toward the automatic gate on the garage. As soon as they were rolling down the street with the wind in her hair, she closed her eyes and tipped her head back, inhaling the fresh night air tinted with the scent of backyard barbecues and fresh cut grass. She felt lighter inside, freer than she had in forever.

Happy.

The thought startled her. Until that moment she hadn’t realized she’d been unhappy. But maybe she’d been simply going through the motions of living, instead of actually enjoying life.

She tapped her fingers on her thighs to the rhythm, started humming under her breath. If she’d been on her own she would have busted out singing.

Reid’s phone chimed. She watched as he picked it up and read the message. His mouth thinned, his jaw tensing beneath the thick, dark stubble.

“No good?” she asked, heart sinking at his expression.

He shook his head. “Nope.”

She opened her mouth to say how ridiculous it was that his ex wouldn’t let him take Autumn out for a spontaneous dessert date, but held it back. “Is it because I’m with you?”

“Nope. This is just how she is.”

“Wow. That sucks.”

“Sucks big time,” he muttered, shoulder checking to change lanes. “Even more for Autumn than for me. But short of burning up a bunch of my savings on more legal fees, there’s nothing I can do.”

That wasn’t fair. Reid seemed like a great dad who wanted to be a bigger part of his daughter’s life, and Autumn adored him. “Why does she do it?”

“To punish me.”

She mentally flinched at the bitterness in his tone. Would his ex really be so small-minded and vindictive as to withhold Autumn from him, just to get back at him? You don’t know him very well. Not fair to just take his side when you don’t know the rest of the story.

“She blames me for our marriage failing. She resents me for making her a divorcee.”

Tess was silent for a minute, then attempted to lighten the mood with small talk, but she sensed Reid’s lingering frustration and decided to stay quiet as they neared the upscale neighborhood where Autumn lived with her mom. The colonial house looked like something out of a magazine spread.

“Did you live here?” she asked him, unable to stem her curiosity.

“No. This is Max’s place. Sarah’s business tycoon boyfriend.”

Ah. So she’d moved on physically, but not necessarily emotionally. At least not enough to forgive Reid and try to make the best of the co-parenting situation. Tess might not know Sarah’s side of the story, but it was hard not to dislike the way she was handling things by depriving her daughter of Reid’s company when they so clearly wanted more time with each other.

The moment they pulled up at the curb the front door flew open and Autumn bounded down the steps, her long, brown ponytail trailing behind her as she ran down the brick walkway to the street. “Hi!” she said, her face flushed with excitement when she neared the Mustang.

Tess opened her door and stepped out, surprised and heart-warmed when Autumn grabbed her in a welcoming hug. “Well hello again to you too,” she said with a laugh, returning the embrace.

Autumn shot her a grin and let go to scramble into the front seat and wrap her arms around her father’s shoulders. “Thanks, Dad,” she said as he handed her the wand.

“Welcome.”

Autumn eased back and looked between him and Tess. “Can I go for a drive with you guys? It’s not my bedtime yet.”

Tess’s heart ached when Reid’s expression froze for a second before he put on a forced but believable smile. “Sorry, baby girl. Maybe another night.”

Autumn went into instant pout mode. “Aww, come on, please? Just a short one? You’ve got the top down and everything, and I found out yesterday that Tess and I like the same music. We can sing for you.”

Tess bit her lip and didn’t say anything, feeling sad for them both. And the moment was even more bittersweet because Reid didn’t blame his ex in front of Autumn.

Instead he gave her a gentle smile and stroked a strand of hair back from her face. “Can’t tonight, sweetheart.”

“But Tess leaves tomorrow. I might not ever see her again,” Autumn said, looking up at Tess.

Tess met Reid’s surprised gaze, and nodded. “I fly back to Fort Worth at noon.”

Reid turned his attention back to his daughter. “I’m sure you’ll see her again. We can set something up for when she comes into town next.”

While her heart leapt at him talking about a next time, she was still preoccupied by the unfairness of the situation. She had half a mind to march up to the front door and speak to Sarah herself, see if she could sweet talk the woman into changing her mind, but it wasn’t Tess’s place and she had no right to interfere.

Autumn’s face fell and she slumped in the passenger seat. “Yeah, okay.”

“Hey,” Reid said, gently chucking her on the chin with his fist. Autumn tried not to smile, but failed. “We’ll ride with the top down when I come to pick you up for your sleepover when I get back from my training thing. Okay?”

“Okay,” she muttered, and slid out of the car to face Tess. “When you come back into town next, will you come with us?”

Tess didn’t want to lie to her, and didn’t want to be condescending. She glanced at Reid for help, and the way he watched her so intently made her insides tingle. It was as though he wanted her to promise to come back.

She smiled at Autumn, a little overwhelmed. There was a lot to take in here, with Reid’s job, child, ex, and past alcoholism. Her gut instinct was to let whatever happened happen, but it would be smart to be cautious when this much baggage was involved, especially on the first date. “I don’t know exactly when that will be, but yes. I promise.” As long as your dad still wants me around, she added silently.

Autumn grinned and threw her thin arms around Tess’s waist. “Thank you. And maybe sometime you could take me flying?”

Aww, hell, that was Tess’s weakness. She could become attached to this kid all too easily. “That would be so awesome.”

“I get to come too,” Reid said.

Tess met his gaze, and smiled at the admiration she saw written there. Guys thought it was cool that she flew Blackhawks, but few understood the risks her job entailed. Reid was one of them. “That’s up to Autumn.”

“He can come too, as long as it’s not a girl’s only thing,” Autumn said.

“What she said,” Tess told him, and the grin he gave her was like a punch to the solar plexus. He was charming enough in his own right. These two together were a deadly combo she had no prayer of resisting, and she didn’t want to.

“Oh! Almost forgot,” Autumn said, digging into her pocket. She pulled out a white pom-pom dog and handed it to Tess. “This is the one we made together. I thought you could put it on the helicopter dashboard. Her name’s Winter.”

Oh, dammit… Tess took it, heart aching as though someone had wrung it out like a wet dishrag. “Winter will look awesome in the cockpit. Thank you.”

“Welcome. See you guys. Love you, Dad,” Autumn called as she started back up the pathway.

“Love you back,” Reid answered.

Tess waited until Autumn waved from the front porch and disappeared into the house before sliding back into the car, Winter the fluffy white pom-pom creature cradled in her palm, its little plastic googly eyes staring up at her. “Oh, my heart,” she said to Reid.

“Yeah, I know. She’s an expert at tugging the heartstrings,” he said, firing up the engine.

Smiling, Tess set Winter on the center of the dashboard next to the German Shepherd Autumn had made Reid, both of them right up against the windshield so they wouldn’t fly out. They both laughed as the little black pupils bounced around with the car’s motion. “She’s such a great kid, Reid.”

“She is,” he agreed, his voice full of fatherly pride. “I keep hoping things will get better the more Sarah sees me trying, but… So far that’s not happening.”

Tess reached across the console for his hand. He shot her a grateful smile and laced his fingers through hers, squeezed in silent thanks. “Where to now?” he asked. “Want to go back to my place?”

Her body hummed with a low-grade arousal that would burst back into flame with a single kiss or caress. She wanted Reid, even if she could only have him this once. “Hmmm. My hotel’s closer.”

He met her gaze, and the sudden flare of heat in his eyes started a delicious throb between her legs. The slow grin he gave her made her insides shiver in anticipation. “You’re right. It is.”