Chapter Eighteen
SALLY TRIED TO call Rusty twice after he left them to walk home, and when she didn’t get a response, she texted him with the name of the hotel where they were staying, a few blocks from his apartment. She’d stayed up half the night trying to figure out how to handle the situation, and consequently, she’d ended up feeling sick for hours. As the sun peeked through the curtains, she cuddled up to Gage. He’d been her saving grace last night, calming her when she’d wanted to drive over to Rusty’s and demand he talk this out. Gage was right. Rusty had probably gone straight to bed. When he was little he’d sleep so soundly she’d put her fingers under his nose to make sure he was breathing.
“How’s the mama?” Gage asked in a groggy voice.
She rested her head on his chest, thinking about their talk, and Rusty, and their secret marriage. “Wishing I hadn’t gotten so upset at him so fast.”
“He wasn’t exactly in a peaceful mood, babe. It was an emotionally charged day.” He kissed her head. His hand snaked around her back, holding her closer. “How’s your stomach? Feeling any better?”
“A little. I’ve been thinking about what you said.”
“About?”
“About Rusty being practically a man. I keep seeing myself as his protector, and I know he needs me to be on some level, but things have changed. I didn’t understand why he was trying to protect me yesterday, but now I get it. After Dave died he began seeing me as his overwhelmed mother, and maybe I was back then. But I’m not now, and he needs to know that. He needs to understand that I’m strong and capable and that I can handle anything. Even him being arrested.”
She lifted her face and looked at Gage. He’d been so patient with her, so willing to step back and do right by Rusty. Now she realized she was the one who needed to step back. “I need to stop thinking of him as a fragile fifteen-year-old who can’t handle growing up. We need to tell him about us. All of it. Our marriage, moving in together. The whole shebang, for better or for worse. He deserves to know.”
Relief washed over Gage’s features. “We’ll drive over and talk to him this morning. But he’s probably still pretty pissed at me. You may need to give me and him some time to clear the air first.”
“Of course.” She rested her cheek on his chest again, absently drawing circles on his stomach. “I have to tell you something that isn’t easy to admit.”
“Bird, you can tell me anything.”
“It hurt knowing Rusty called you instead of me. I was a little jealous, and that was a weird feeling to have as his mother. I hate thinking that when he finds out we waited almost three weeks to tell him about us, he could be even more hurt. I think it was a mistake to wait.”
Gage pulled her up beside him on the pillow and turned, giving her his full attention. “It wasn’t a mistake, babe. You were being careful, and that’s never a mistake.”
“I’m not so sure.” She rolled over, untangling Gage’s shirt from around her waist. They’d left town so fast they hadn’t stopped to pack a bag. She’d slept in the shirt Gage had worn yesterday. She grabbed her phone from the bedside table and checked her messages.
“Three texts from Danica, Kaylie, and Max, and none from Rusty.”
“He’s probably still sleeping. We’ll pick up breakfast and head over after we shower.”
She sent a quick text to the girls and set her phone on the table again. Feeling queasy, she scooted to the edge of the bed and sat up. “I’m going to use the bathroom. Would you mind calling the front desk to see if they have toothbrushes and toothpaste? A comb or a brush would be great, too.” She pushed to her feet, and Gage’s shirt tumbled down her thighs.
Sally leaned against the bathroom sink, waiting for her nervous stomach to settle, and studied her face in the mirror, feeling ten years older than she had yesterday. How did parents get through these types of situations? What if Rusty was lying? She hated to think that way, but how could she be sure until she sat down and looked into her boy’s eyes when he wasn’t flaming mad at Gage?
Should he be punished for putting Gage in that position in the first place? Punish a twenty-year-old? Was he well within his rights as a young man to ask his confidant to keep his secret in order to protect his mother? She closed her eyes against hot tears, feeling completely overwhelmed.
She leaned forward and stared at her face in the mirror. “Stop crying, or your boy is never going to see you as strong and capable.”
She straightened her spine, drew her shoulders back, and yanked a towel from the rack. Wiping her tears, frustrated that keeping secrets had made her emotionally edgy, she told herself they’d get through this.
After using the bathroom and washing her face, she drew in a few deep breaths, readying herself to face the day, no matter what it brought.
“Gage?” she said as she left the bathroom. He was answering the door, shirtless and sexy in a pair of low-slung jeans. She touched the edge of her—his—shirt where it hit her thighs, smiling to herself. She loved wearing his shirts. “Hopefully that’s toothbrushes.”
“Rusty,” Gage said in a tight voice.
“Hey, I was looking for my mom’s room, but they didn’t have her listed at the desk.”
Sally’s stomach lurched, sending bile into her throat. “Rusty—”
Rusty peered over Gage’s shoulder. “Mom?”
She grabbed her jeans and scrambled to put them on.
“What the fu—” Rusty shouldered past Gage. If looks could kill, she’d be dead and buried. “I’m out of here.”
He stormed out the door, and Gage grabbed his arm. “Rusty, wait.”
“Fuck you.” He twisted out of Gage’s grip and disappeared from view.
Gage started after him, but Sally bolted out to stop him. “Hold on. Let me talk to him first.” She took off down the walkway, the frigid morning air stinging her face, cold concrete burning her bare feet as she ran after her son. “Rusty! Wait!”
He descended the steps at a fast clip, but there was no faster runner than a mother in fear of losing her son. She caught up to him in the parking lot and grabbed his arm. He spun around with fire in his eyes.
“Wait—” She bent over at the knees, her stomach churning, dizzily trying to catch her breath. “We need to talk.” She was shaking from cold, and her stomach lurched again. She turned away just as she threw up, barely missing his sneakers.
“Mom! Are you okay?” His voice was filled with concern. He took off his coat and put it around her shoulders.
She held up a hand, afraid to speak for fear of puking again. She took a few steps away from the mess and sank down to her heels.
“Mom, I’m sorry. Are you sick? Is that why you were in the room with Gage?”
She shook her head, afraid of sending him into a fit of anger, but all this stress was tearing her up. The truth came weakly. “No.”
She pushed to her feet, dizzily grabbing his arm to steady herself, and looked into her son’s confused eyes. “I’m not sick, honey. This is just stress or something I ate.”
“Bird,” Gage called as he ran across the parking lot. He handed Rusty his coat and wrapped Sally’s around her. He set her boots down beside her and held her as she stepped into them. “Are you okay?”
She nodded, though she was anything but okay. Her stomach felt like the ocean after a storm, unsure if it would rise up again or calm. But it was the worry in her son’s eyes that was breaking her heart.
“You need to sit down.” Gage guided her toward a bench in the grass.
“Rusty—”
He came to her side. “I’m here. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you sick.”
“You didn’t make me sick,” she said, lowering herself to the bench, flanked by the two of them.
Rusty leaned his elbows on his knees, rubbing his hands together.
Gage kept a hand on Sally’s back. “You sure you’re okay? Want me to get you some water?”
“No. I think all this secret keeping is eating away at my stomach.” She sat back, knowing she’d brought this on herself. It was no wonder Rusty thought he should keep his arrest a secret. He was his mother’s son after all.
“Rusty, we have something to tell you.” She reached for her son’s hand, and he reluctantly allowed her to hold it.
“I think it’s pretty clear, Mom. You and Gage are hooking up.” The dark stare he pinned on Gage and the way he squeezed her hand told her he was not okay with it.
“No, honey. We’re not hooking up.”
His brow wrinkled, a softer look rising in his eyes.
She drew in a deep breath and sat up straighter, taking Gage’s hand in hers. “We’re married.”
Rusty’s eyes widened. “Married? As in, married?”
“Yes,” she said. “It was an accident, but it’s not anymore.”
“An accident? How do you accidentally get married?” He pulled his hand from her grip.
“It turns out what happens in Vegas doesn’t stay in Vegas,” Gage said with an air of let’s-lighten-the-mood, but Rusty’s jaw was tight, his eyes stern. He looked as annoyed as ever. “Rusty, nothing will change. I love your mother, and I love you.”
“No shit,” Rusty snapped. “Everyone in the fucking town knows you love her, but this changes everything.”
Oh God, here we go. “That’s enough, Rusty. You don’t need to get nasty. This is hard for all of us.”
“So…what? You got drunk and ended up married?” Rusty pushed to his feet and paced. “You were in Vegas three weeks ago.”
“I know, and I’m sorry.” Sally stood, swaying on her feet, still mildly dizzy. Gage’s arm came around her waist, and she was thankful for the support—both physical and emotional.
“After all you’ve been through, your mother wanted to be sure about us before we told you,” Gage explained.
“This explains a lot.” Rusty pushed a hand through his hair, staring at the ground. He stopped pacing and lifted a challenging gaze at Gage. “What else have you told her?”
“Rusty.” Sally stepped forward. “I know you trust Gage—”
“Trusted,” he said icily.
“Rusty,” Gage said, “even if I weren’t in a relationship with your mother, I would have had to tell her about your arrest. That’s not like a bad grade or a car. Nothing has changed between you and me,” he insisted. “You and your mom have both been, and remain, my priorities.”
“Wait,” Sally said, wondering what else he was keeping from her about her son. “A bad grade?”
“It was just an example,” Gage reassured her.
“Who are you kidding?” Rusty snapped. “Everything has changed. The two people I trusted most in this world have been keeping the biggest secret of all from me. How can that possibly not change things?”
Sally felt him slipping away, just like she had after Dave died, and she realized that she hadn’t even begun to touch the hurt she’d caused. She was doing what his father did to him all over again, springing a secret relationship on him. She sank down to the bench in shock.
“Sally?” Gage knelt beside her.
“Mom?”
She looked at them both with tears in her eyes. “He’s right. This changes everything. How could I be so stupid?”
“Baby…?” Gage took her hand with imploring eyes.
“We’re Dave all over again,” she said flatly. “After Dave died, we found out that he had been secretly seeing Chase and his mother, building a relationship with them before he revealed the truth to us. He thought he was protecting us, and it tore me and Rusty to pieces.” Tears streamed down her cheeks, and she turned to Rusty, hoping with all her heart that she hadn’t ruined their relationship beyond repair.
“We were doing the same thing, building a relationship to make sure it was solid before telling you. I thought it was the only smart choice. Gage wanted to tell you right away. But my biggest worry was that if things didn’t work out with me and Gage that you would lose him as your confidant. He promised me that would never happen, but I needed to know in my heart that I wasn’t risking your relationship with him for my own happiness. And on top of that, I was so afraid of losing your trust, I didn’t realize I was putting you in a position where I couldn’t help but lose it.”
Rusty clenched his jaw.
She pushed to her feet again, her gaze moving between the two men who owned her heart. “I love you both so much. Rusty, this was my mistake, not Gage’s. The only thing he did to break your trust was to tell me about the arrest, and honestly, if he hadn’t, and I found out, it would have ruined the relationship you have with him anyway. And Gage…” She swiped at her tears, but more followed. “I did this to us, and I’m so sorry.”
“Babe.” He gathered her in his arms. “You did what you thought was right for Rusty.”
“Jesus,” Rusty ground out.
Sally pushed from Gage’s arms. “I’m sorry. I know that’s probably hard for you to see.”
Rusty rolled his eyes. “Obviously he makes you happy.” He stared at Gage and motioned to Sally. “And clearly you’ve been in love with her for years.”
“Yes.” The unwavering love in Gage’s voice calmed and worried Sally at once. She hoped it didn’t set Rusty off again.
“Fuck.” Rusty sank down to the bench and covered his face with both hands. His long legs stretched out before him and his arms fell heavily to his sides, his gaze moving between the two of them. “This is fucking weird.”
“Can you please stop saying that word?” Sally asked. “I know it’s weird. It was weird for me, too.” She slid an arm around Gage’s back. “But then I realized it was only weird because I’d fallen in love with my best friend.”
“This makes you my stepfather,” Rusty said uneasily as he pushed a hand through his hair. His bangs fell right back down in front of his eyes.
Gage sat next to Rusty, bringing Sally down beside him. “You’re a man, Rusty. Legally, yeah, it gives me that title, but I don’t want to replace your father. Hell, I don’t want our relationship to change at all, although I can see how it has to, in some ways. This is a lot for all of us to adjust to.”
“You think?” Rusty scoffed, but a hint of a smile followed, giving Sally hope that they could eventually move past this. “So, what now?”
Sally and Gage exchanged an uneasy look, and she read his silent question. Do we go for it and tell him about the house?
“Whatever it is, just spit it out,” Rusty said. “There’s not much you can do to top this.”
“We could get arrested,” Sally said with a smile.
Rusty scowled. “That sucked, and as soon as my friend is back from his cruise with his parents, he’ll clear it up.”
“I was just trying to take the edge off.” She guessed they’d be dodging sharp edges for a while, and that was okay, as long as it didn’t sever any ties. “Honey, it’s about the house. I’ll keep it as long as you want me to, but I’m going to be moving in with Gage.”
“Dad’s house?” Rusty asked solemnly.
“I’m sorry. It feels wrong to try to start over there.”
Rusty looked at Gage for a long moment, as if he was trying to envision him in their house, and sighed heavily. “I guess that makes sense. When are you moving?”
Sally looked at Gage. They’d agreed she wouldn’t move until after the holidays so Rusty could spend one last Christmas with her in their house. “After the holidays, when you go back to school.”
He nodded sullenly. “But don’t sell it yet.”
“We won’t.”
“As your mom said, we’ll hang on to it as long as you want us to. There’s no rush,” Gage reassured him. “And I want you to know that you’ll always have your own room at our house. And by our house, I mean yours, mine, and your mom’s.”
Sally watched Rusty with worry, hoping he wouldn’t lash out again.
Rusty held Gage’s gaze, squared his shoulders, and nodded curtly.
It was such a manly affirmation, it took Sally by surprise. She’d watched as her son’s world was turned upside down and he’d struggled through and found his footing. Her boy had grown up right before her eyes. He was no longer a kid on the cusp of manhood watching his friendship unravel through broken trust and breached confidence. He was a young man staking claim as such in his new reality.
And Sally knew in her heart, no matter what else came his way, he would be okay. They would be okay.