Chapter Eighteen
The few days that Sofía spent getting to know Giselle and her husband reinforced her determination to make her marriage work. She would not allow Perry to be the only one in his family to have an unhappy union. Rushton was a lot older than Giselle but he did not treat his wife like a child but as an equal. She liked that about him.
Her brother-in-law spent his days out and about with his friend leaving her alone for a considerable amount of time as Giselle was stricken with nausea on and off all day. She didn't come down for dinner so Sofia decided she would have a tray in her room rather than eat alone with two such formidable gentlemen. She was sure they were relieved.
This gave her far too much time to think. One of the things she dwelled on, after her beloved husband, was what Beau should do in order to escape from his duties for a few months. She no longer thought of this as a way of him finding himself a wife, but to allow him to find his own version of contentment.
The gentlemen didn't suggest she rode out with them so she went out on her own every day and enjoyed her rides. Essex was rather flat and uninteresting compared to Spain and she wished with all her heart she had been able to travel to the north of England. She had heard there were hills and mountains there which would remind her of her previous home.
On the morning of their departure Giselle was feeling a lot better and they were in the small drawing room together waiting for the carriage to be harnessed. 'I do apologise for neglecting you so shamefully, Sofia. I am looking forward to spending time with you when we come for the Christmas period. It is a great shame that Perry didn't come this time – I am the only member of the family not to have seen him since his return.'
'Thank you for being so hospitable. I am not with child, I hope I am able to give Perry the family he wants.'
'Do not be disappointed, Sofia, sometimes it can take several months to conceive.'
'Aubrey's wife has not done so after two years. This is no problem for them as they do not wish to have children – but we do.'
The conversation ended abruptly as they saw the vehicle pull up in the turning circle. The luggage and servants had left at dawn and would be waiting at the hostelry they intended to stay at for the night.
She embraced her sister-in-law and hurried out not wishing to keep Beau standing about. He handed her into the carriage.
'I hope you have enjoyed your visit, my dear, but I can see you are eager to get home. Perry should be back soon after us.'
'I am so fortunate to have married into your family. I cannot imagine there is another one in the country where every member is as kind, intelligent and attractive. I shall do my best to live up to your high standards.'
'My dear girl, you are our equal on every front. My brother chose the perfect wife for him. You both indicated that you wanted to have your marriage ratified in the family chapel. I thought we could do that when the house is festively decorated and the family are all here to celebrate the Lord's name day.'
'I should love that. I just wish my mother had been present the first time and that she was not going to miss the second ceremony.'
'Wellington has all but driven the French from Spain, I think it would be safe for her to travel. She cannot be here in time for Christmas but hopefully she will be in England when there is a christening.'
She blinked back tears. 'There will be no baby next summer.'
'Do not despair, little one, these things can take time. You will have children soon enough and then might wish your nursery was not quite so full. Your accommodation will not be ready before then so there is no rush.'
This was a strange conversation to be having with an unmarried gentleman. She had spoken to Giselle on the subject and had been told that there was no necessity to produce a baby every year if one did not wish to do so. She had not elaborated further, but had suggested that Perry speak to Rushton when they next met.
The carriage settled into companionable silence and remained that way until they paused at an inn to rest the horses and take refreshments themselves. These were ready for them and very tasty too.
As before she dined in her room and Polly had a truckle bed at the end of hers. Once more the servants departed whilst it was barely light so they would be home and have everything ready for their arrival.
She had something interesting to tell the duke and could not wait to be on the way so that she could speak to him without fear of being overheard.
'We should be at Silchester mid-afternoon – earlier if we do not stop too long at midday. Would you rather press on or take our time?'
'I should prefer to arrive as soon as possible. I want to look my best when Perry gets back.'
'He cares little for such things as well you know. Did you think he would have rejected you when he recovered his sight if you had not been beautiful?'
'He knew my features were regular, that...' She stopped herself just in time from saying something most indiscreet.
The only way Perry could have known her shape was if he had placed his hands on her person in a way that would be considered quite disgraceful by his formidable brother. She ducked her head and hoped the wide brim of her chip straw bonnet would hide her blushes.
'You did not answer my question, Sofia.'
'His love is not so shallow, unlike some gentlemen he does not prize appearance above everything else.'
'Exactly so. Therefore, you are worrying unnecessarily about your marriage. It had the most unusual beginning, but I am certain you will both adjust to your new circumstances given time.'
There had been enough talk about her marriage and now she wished to discuss her plan with him.
'You cannot paint, you have no scientific knowledge, but I recall that all your family are musical – is that correct?'
'Some of us more so than others. If I had not been born first perhaps I would have concentrated more on music and might have produced something worth listening to. Why do you ask?'
'Then you should find yourself somewhere quiet, away from the grandeur and responsibilities of Silchester, and spend a few months composing.'
His smile was sad. 'There is nothing I should like better, but I cannot abandon my post. You are not suggesting this would be an opportunity to find myself a wife?'
'I have abandoned that idea. No, I just think that now you have both Perry and Aubrey to take the reins then you could be away for several months without being missed.' She knew he was going to disagree, to point out that whilst he had been in Spain things had not gone as they should because Bennett had been called to London.
'You could leave in the new year and return in the summer – the family could manage without you for that length of time and it would give you a new perspective on your life.'
'You are very persuasive, my dear, I shall give the matter some thought.' He stretched out his legs closed his eyes ending the conversation.
She was too restless to sleep, too excited at the thought that her husband would return to her in the next day or two. Her thoughtless words still separated them but she was confident she could persuade him she was contrite and that they were spoken in anger.
They were no more than an hour from their destination when the duke spoke again. 'There is a small estate in Herefordshire, it belonged to our mother, no one from the family has ever lived there. I believe Carstairs said the long-standing tenant had just passed away and he was having the place refurbished before finding someone else.'
She sat forward and, in her excitement at his words, put her hand on his arm. 'That sounds absolutely perfect. Nobody will know who you are, you can spend the time in solitude or mix with your neighbours if you so wish.'
There was a sudden thump on the roof. The carriage rocked to a standstill. Why had they stopped so suddenly?
*
Perry moved rapidly away from the door so Madeline and Grey would not know he had overheard their conversation. He turned with a relaxed smile when his brother-in-law came in.
'I wanted to talk to you, Grey, but it can wait. I wish to call in and see Bennett before I return home.'
'I am overseeing the repairs to a row of cottages so will not be about much during the day for the next two weeks.'
'The matter is not urgent, I will catch up with you both when Sofia returns.'
With a cheery wave he strode out and walked around to the stables to collect his horse. Sultan had not been untacked, the girths merely loosened, so it was a matter of moments to tighten them and be in the saddle.
He was consumed by an emotion he didn't recognise. His brother had no right to go away with Sofia, to encourage her to depend on him when she should be turning to her husband for advice. He recalled every word she had said to him the last time they had spoken. Did she believe it would be acceptable for her to take a lover? She had suggested that he find himself a mistress – he was damned if he would.
Beau he trusted implicitly. Sofia had changed since they were married and he didn't really know her. Had her wild years included sharing her favours? After all, she had come to him without a second's hesitation even though they were not married.
Had she been an innocent then? Everything had happened so quickly, he had not given the matter any thought. His brother would never betray him but he was certain there were gentlemen who would be only too happy to make love to his beautiful wife if they got the opportunity and she was willing.
He had been too lax with her. Allowed her to behave as if she was unmarried. By law she belonged to him and from this moment forward he intended to make damn sure she did as she was told or would suffer the consequences.
He didn't call in to see his brother. The mood he was in he would say something he would regret. No, this was something he must deal with himself, something private between him and his wife. The more time he spent on his own the more convinced he became that Sofia intended to play him false. Perhaps not immediately, but she would never have given him carte blanche otherwise. From now on he would keep her close, make sure she was never alone with any gentleman, even his brothers and brothers-in-law.
He spent his evenings drinking and fell into bed in an alcoholic stupor. Getting up each morning with a sore head and roiling guts did nothing for his temper.
Five days after his return, it was late afternoon when he eventually pulled himself together and went out for some fresh air. He saw at once that the carriage carrying the trunks had already arrived. Sofia and Beau could not be far behind. Zorro was prancing around the stable yard waiting for him.
'You are excited, old fellow. How do you know that your mistress is coming home today? Shall we go and meet her?' The animal barked as if agreeing with him.
This should have been a joyous occasion but his humour had worsened and the more he had drunk the more convinced he had become that his wife no longer loved him and wished to sever the connection if she could.
He kicked Billy into a gallop, ignoring the shocked expressions of the grooms. Mistreating one's horse was not something a gentleman should do. He was forced to stop to cast up his accounts which did nothing to improve his mood.
He saw the carriage approaching along the lane and thundered towards it. He approached from the rear, the coachman would not have seen him, and hammered on the roof. The driver heaved on the reins and the carriage rocked to a halt.
The door swung open and his brother stepped out looking none too pleased at the way the carriage had been stopped.
'What were you thinking? Is there an emergency that could not wait until I return?'
Perry leaned down from his horse, wanting to see Sofia. 'I need to speak to my wife. It is none of your damn business.'
Beau recoiled. 'You are drunk. You will speak to no one until you are sober.' He turned his back and jumped back into the carriage. The door slammed behind him and the driver snapped his whip.
Perry was left feeling foolish and this added fuel to his fury. He hurtled back over the hedges and ditches and arrived in the stable yard just as the carriage was turning onto the long, winding drive. Sofia would have to go to her rooms. He would be there waiting.
His valet and her maid were dismissed. His vision was blurred – he wasn't sure if it was a surfeit of brandy or if the doctor was wrong and he was indeed going blind again. A stiff drink was what he needed and there was a decanter in his sitting room. There was time enough to find it before the reckoning began.
The fact that he had eaten almost nothing these past few days, and drunk three bottles of brandy, not to mention the claret, had not enhanced either his constitution or his disposition.
He was no longer thinking straight, had allowed his doubts and jealousy to escalate to the point where he truly believed Sofia had tricked him into marriage, had already given her innocence to another, and had never loved him as she professed.
Hard drinking after a battle was expected of the officers – the men were given a pint of rum a day which was why most of them had taken the King's shilling in the first place. But never in his life had he consumed alcohol during the day and he was no longer able to think coherently.
He drained a third glass and his hands stopped shaking. He returned to her bedchamber and prowled about the room until he began to feel unwell. She could not be here for another half an hour at least so he would rest on her bed until he heard her come in. No sooner had he closed his eyes than he passed out.
*
Sofia waited until Beau was back in his seat before speaking. 'Was Perry in his cups?'
'He was. I have no idea what has caused him to behave so badly – I suggest you keep your distance till I have had time to speak to him and I shall not do so until he has sobered up.'
'I was so looking forward to seeing him. In the few months we have been acquainted he has never drank to excess, rarely had more than a glass of wine with his dinner and cider with his midday repast. Something dreadful must have happened, he has had bad news, I cannot think of any other reason why he should appear in such a rage as he did.'
'It is out of character. You must not fret, little one, I shall solve this conundrum and you will see it is no more than a misunderstanding of some sort.'
His words sent a shiver of apprehension through her. Up until that point it had not occurred to her his drinking and behaviour were somehow related to her. 'You think this is something to do with us?'
'I am certain of it. Did you part on bad terms?'
She explained what had taken place and the stupid things she had said. 'This is all my fault...'
'Nonsense. My brother is an adult, he is responsible for his own actions. If he was idiot enough to take what you said at face value then he has only himself to blame.' He reached across and patted her hand. 'How would you feel if he did indeed take himself a mistress?'
'I would be devastated – then I would take my revenge. This doesn't explain why he was angry. I can almost understand why he should drink to excess if he believed I had rejected him. But I cannot see why he would then be so furious with me – one would expect him to be sad if he truly loved me.'
'You are right to be concerned. As I said, this is based on a misunderstanding which I intend to put right. I think it might be wise if you moved in with Aubrey until the matter is resolved.'
'I shall return to my apartment and arrange for Polly to transfer my necessities. I hope they don't object to me foisting myself upon them in this way.'
'Better to cause them a little inconvenience, my dear, than have something happen between you and Perry that cannot be put right.'