I made it to Olema before I couldn’t take it anymore. Seriously, who was I kidding? Walden was going to meet his ex, and I was supposed to drive home and work on jewelry design? I’d probably end up making a sword instead of the commissioned pendant. Oh no, not a sword. A penis guillotine. Yes, that’s what I’d design. Then I’d find fucking Levi What’s-His-Face and test it out. He deserved it to begin with, but even more so now. Just when I’d told a man I loved him, just when I was able to admit it to myself. The fucker chose to show up at that moment? Trying to win my man back now?

Maybe I’d upgrade to a full-sized guillotine. Oh, oh! Maybe a combo design. Two heads at once.

I pulled the car over and parked along the little shops of the main street—they tried so hard to pull off the charm Lavender Shores managed so effortlessly.

Oh my God, I really was distraught. I was thinking complimentary thoughts about Lavender Shores.

I needed to cool down. If I drove back now, I’d do something… well, I wasn’t sure what, but since the thought of guillotines filled me with joy, that was probably a sign I should slow my roll. On the left-hand side of the street, I noticed a sports memorabilia shop. I shuddered. That wouldn’t help. God, sports. A few stores down, a coffee shop called. Perfect. Just what I needed. Caffeine.

Caffeine probably wasn’t a good idea either. But whatever. Caffeine or murder. For now, caffeine would win. And chocolate, while we’re at it.

A few minutes later, I found a bench and settled in with my large espresso-rich mocha and a massive brownie. Chocolate times two.

The first day of June was gorgeous. Bright, sunny, cloudless, with a pleasant breeze. At least that was what I’d noticed when we’d woken up that morning. The fucking birds had been singing while I’d made love to Walden. Actually singing. Like a Disney cartoon, if Disney showed the fucking parts. For a moment I’d thought I stumbled into Andrew’s life.

But no. This made much more sense. I had no idea whether the day was still beautiful or not. It was all gray. Even with the addition of chocolate and caffeine.

What was I doing to myself? How did I let this happen?

I’d been happy, content. Well, no, maybe not happy. But as happy as Gilbert Bryant could be. That was good. I had my house. Had my career, my art. Clients who graced the covers of gossip magazines. And sure, I still needed therapy, but everyone did. Most just didn’t know it. Life had been stable, for the most part. A hiccup here and there, but it was good. Life was good.

Then Walden and his fucking hot ass on that damn Stairmaster. It had all gone downhill from there. The rest of his edible body. Those blue eyes. That wavy hair. That talented, talented ass. Again, that ass. Holy shit.

The perfect hookup. Perfect.

Except for the hidden I’m going to fucking turn your entire existence upside down. Other than that, sure, perfect hookup.

Walden with his damn sweetness. The wounded quality that I couldn’t help but recognize. The trust he seemed so willing to give, even after all his hurts. The way he set my body on fire and my mind at ease.

Goddamn Andrew and his fucking engagement party. If I’d never gone back for that damn thing, I wouldn’t have ended up sitting in Olema, of all places, contemplating chopping some little bitch’s dick off.

Maybe it was for the best. End it before it went even further. Levi’s timing was perfect. Perfect. I’d already started to envision life with Walden. Staying at his place during the school months, mine during his vacations, getting lost in his garden with my sketchpad and designing the best creations of my life.

Ridiculous.

Yeah, Levi’s timing was perfect.

Saved me from all that.

But fuck, it hurt.

Walden wouldn’t choose me. Maybe he was the love of my life, but Levi was the love of his. They had history. Even if that history had a ton of pain. Talk about a redemption romance.

And fuck. It. Hurt.

I loved him. New or not, which it wasn’t. I’d loved him for months, I’d just been too… Gilbert… to realize.

I loved him.

If you love someone set them free. If they come back…. God, I wanted to vomit as much as I had yesterday morning.

You know what? Fuck. That. Levi really was a little, lying sack of shit. And God knew I was about as far from perfect as they got, but I’d never do anything to knowingly hurt Walden. Ever. And sure, he deserved a hell of a lot better than me. But I knew for shit I was better than Levi.

I stuffed the rest of the brownie in my mouth, then simultaneously chugged the remainder of the mocha and hurried to my car.

Time to storm the castle.

Slay the dragon.

Rescue the maiden.

I once again parked, this time on Ocean Way, the perfectly perfect main street of Lavender Shores, before all those notions faded. Most of them.

I would fight for Walden. If I needed to. But maybe….

I pictured him beneath me the night before, as we were in the garden, his eyes meeting mine as he came, then as he said he loved me. Felt the comfort of his fingers laced with mine. Heard his quiet breathing as he slept next to me.

Maybe he’d choose me on his own, like he’d said before I left.

If he would, if he could, I wanted to know that.

And if he didn’t… then I’d fight.

So, what was I supposed to do? I was already back in Lavender Shores. I knew Walden was meeting Levi at Lavender Leaves at… I glanced at the clock. Seven minutes ago. I looked at the coffee and tea shop through the windshield. They were in there. Maybe Walden had looked at Levi and all the old feelings came rushing back and he’d already forgotten my name.

Maybe he hadn’t.

Okay, I wasn’t going to rush in guns a-blazing. Or sword or guillotine slashing, for that matter. But I wasn’t driving back home either. Charley’s Tavern was directly across the street from Lavender Leaves. But I couldn’t. Shouldn’t.

Whatever. I wasn’t killing the fucker, so that had to be good enough. All bets were off beyond that.

I went the long way around, walking up one block and then down the other. I figured it was less likely Walden would see me out the window if I didn’t cross in the middle of the street. I kept my head turned toward the shop windows as I passed. I’d stuffed my straw cowboy hat on my head as I got out of the car, feeling like I’d covered my face. Dumb. Like he wouldn’t recognize that hat a million miles away. I darted into Charley’s Tavern like I was a spy avoiding the Russians, feeling some safety behind walls. Walls of glass. I didn’t wait to be seated, just chose a table next to the window and dared a look over.

To my surprise, the glare off the Lavender Leaves window was minimal. I saw them instantly, and to my relief, Walden’s back was to the street, but his dark wavy blond hair was evident. My heart sank as I studied the man across from him. Maybe because he was such a slime-ball, I’d pictured him differently. Like a rat or something. Maybe bad skin and teeth. Like his soul would show through to his outside. As in most things in life, that didn’t work as I’d thought it should. Levi was fucking gorgeous. Probably as tall as Walden, and just as thick. Tan skin, black hair, and damn good taste in clothes from what I could see.

Well, fuck.

There was a smack on the back of my shoulder. “Gilbert Bryant, get your hat off in a restaurant. Where are your manners, young man? Your father would tan your hide.”

I jumped, more from the sensation of being caught than from being hit. I whipped around and looked up into Mabel’s dark and seemingly ageless face. She grinned, humor twinkling in her eyes. She was one of the few who always treated me the same. I was the same Gilbert after Mr. Fitz as I’d been before. Of course, my family had been coming to her restaurant since before I was born, so I’m sure that didn’t hurt. I yanked off my hat. “Sorry, Mabel. Wasn’t thinking. You waiting tables today?” Suddenly I remembered where I was. Charley’s, not Mabel’s.

She narrowed her eyes at me. “You been drinking this early in the day?”

I shook my head, still feeling out of place. “What are you doing at Charley’s?”

“You think I only eat at my own restaurant?” She placed her hands on her hips. “I came in here to have lunch, of course. Then I saw you walk in. I didn’t get to talk to you at the wedding the other day, so I wanted to say hi. Plus, you look like you’re up to no good.”

I flashed her a toothy grin, adding a flirty tone I didn’t really feel. “It’s like you’ve met me before or something.”

“That I have.” She shook her head. “Speaking of, I’ve been hearing stories. You and that new teacher.”

God, I fucking hated this town. I sighed. “Yep. Rumors are true. Just like always.”

She nodded. “Good. I like him. You need a good man. He’s not too bad on the eyes either.”

I studied her, waiting for the kicker. Though that wasn’t her style. “You giving your stamp of approval?”

“Since when did you wait around for anyone’s approval?” She winked. “That's why you were always my favorite Bryant. But I’ll deny that, of course, should one of your siblings tattle on you.” She patted my hand. “Well, my food’s getting cold, so I’m gonna get back to it.” She winked and started to walk off.

“Mabel?”

She turned back around. “Yeah, darling?”

“Thanks.”

She gave another wink, and the server arrived, a girl I didn’t know. I placed my order and refocused on Lavender Leaves. Levi was still gorgeous. The fucker. Though, he didn’t look happy. His gaze darted to mine. I flinched. Then realized, he probably wasn’t looking at me, not from this distance. And even if he were, he had no idea who I was.

The longer I watched, the more at peace I felt. Even with the guilt that tried to make itself known for spying on Walden. Whatever they were saying, it clearly wasn’t going the way Levi hoped.

Levi no longer looked agitated, but I couldn’t really read his expression that well. Then he reached out and put his hand on Walden’s.

“Look what the cat dragged in. Ruining someone else’s life?”

Thoughts of the guillotine drifted through my mind, and I told myself to watch my tongue as I turned to face a voice I knew so well. I was not going to make a scene at Charley’s. Especially with Walden across the street. “Erica Epstein.” I did a double take when I looked up at her. She’d been blonde the last time. Now she was a Kool-Aid orange. The Epsteins had more money than God, but it was just like my father said—money can’t buy class. The same wasn’t true for her half-brother. Donovan had more class than I could ever hope to have, which I proved every time I ran into his fucking sister. “Wow, that color does things to your complexion, doesn’t it?” Erica always brought out my bitch side. And I never felt bad about it. This time was no exception.

She flipped her long hair over her shoulder, but that was as much as she let on that my insult had landed. “Destroying another teacher I hear.”

And again, fuck this town.

Her insult landed as well. And she won. I had no response.

She smiled and leaned over, supporting her weight on the table with her hands, diamond rings flashing as she drummed her fingers. Behind her, I noticed her husband and kids at another table. Maybe I’d missed them when I walked in. “Why don’t you stay gone? Lord knows the bunch of you Bryants are a horrid lot, but you take their bad name and drag it in the sewer.”

The Bryants and Epsteins had been at war ever since the town’s founding. I’d never given a shit about it, nor anything Lavender Shores related, but Erica acted like the feud had begun when she was born, not decades before. She’d never been pleasant, but she was the ringleader of the torment about Mr. Fitz. And her influence had made my life hell.

She’d thrown me off with her teacher comment and showing up out of the blue when I had all things Walden on my mind, but a conversation I’d had with Andrew the night before his wedding came back to me. I’d known I’d use it at some point but hadn’t figured I’d get the chance so soon.

I glanced at her husband and children again and started to raise my voice. Then guilt finally showed up. Maybe because I was in love or some shit. Whatever was responsible for my stupid conscience, I switched my intention to a whisper and met her horrid gaze dead-on. “How’s Cody Wisner doing, Erica? I heard he was back in town for some sort of business the other night.”

She paled and her fingers stopped drumming. Her words were a hiss. “I’ll kill you. I swear, Gilbert Bryant. I will kill you.”

“You made my life hell. For years.” I forced a friendly smile I didn’t feel and sat up straighter. “I’m going to be in town a lot more from now on. I suggest you not even look in my direction again. Much less ever say my name. Or Walden’s. Got it?”

She glared. Hate evident. Couldn’t blame her. I felt the same for her. Actually, I realized, I didn’t. It was gone. I despised her, but she was nothing to me. Not anymore.

We’d reached an understanding.

One final glare and she turned with another exaggerated hair flip and strutted back to her husband and children.

I watched her for a second. The temptation arose to have a little chat with her husband, after all the years of her taunts of home-wrecker. But I couldn’t. I’d already destroyed one family. I wouldn’t do it again.

Still, Andrew’s sister was part owner of the Blue Blossom Bed-and-Breakfast. If Erica was stupid enough to meet her old high school sweetheart at a hotel in Lavender Shores, it was only a matter of time. It didn’t need to come from me, though.

Bella came up at the moment, dropping off a plate of the world’s finest fried chicken. “Need anything else, Gilbert?”

“Nah, thanks, hun.”

She nodded and left.

A mocha, brownie, and now fried chicken. I needed to stop that shit if I was going to keep the six-pack Walden seemed to enjoy so much.

Walden! Shit. I’d gotten completely distracted.

I looked across the street, and my heart sank. Their table was empty, and a woman stood by the window. I did a quick scan, trying to peer into the depths of Lavender Leaves, then over the sidewalks as far as I could see, but the reflection cut off my view. I couldn’t find them. Walden or Levi.

I started to stand, intending to rush after them, run down one block and then the next. They couldn’t be too far.

No. I sank back into the chair. No. However this went, it was Walden’s decision. If he chose Levi, I’d fight for him however I could. But I had to trust, at least for now, that what we felt was real.

And I was going to eat every bit of the damned fried chicken as I watched my cell phone screen for Walden to call. And if he took too long, I’d order pie too.