Cash had left while I unpacked the sacks from the grocery store. I hadn’t meant to make him run off—I only needed a little space to think—but he didn’t hesitate before grabbing his keys off the counter and driving away. Had I thought about it, I would’ve grabbed Aria’s seat from his car, but that had been the last thing on my mind.

Until I tried to leave.

I didn’t have anywhere in particular to go, considering I hadn’t spent much time exploring the island. I just needed to get out of the house. Being there without Cash while he was away at work was one thing, but the stagnant silence that lingered in his abrupt absence after an emotional dispute was something else entirely. Sitting around and waiting for him to come back was torturous.

I’d contemplated shooting him a text, asking where he was and when he planned to return, but I figured that’d only make things worse. I’d prepared myself to use the car seat as an excuse, yet after his reaction to the possibility that I might move back home, there was no doubt that would solidify my decision in his mind—even though I hadn’t made one yet. I still had a lot to think about. One of those things was how simply being around him in person lessened the doubt I had about him.

So after I fed Aria lunch, I decided to head across the street to the beach. She needed a nap, and by pushing it back, I ran the risk of having a very cranky toddler on my hands, but I refused to sit around while she slept. I had picked my battle.

Even though Aria was sleepy, it didn’t stop her from hitting the waves hard. And by the time we made it back to the house, she was completely depleted of energy. It was all I could do to rinse her off and change her clothes before laying her down. Other than asking about Cash once or twice, she hadn’t brought him up or pitched a fit about him not being there, which was a slight miracle. I should’ve worried about her attachment to him, especially since it happened so quickly, but I couldn’t find it in me to feel anything less than blessed that she’d found someone to love. And at least from what I could tell, he was just as fond of her as she was of him.

Thinking back to this morning when she threw herself into his arms, and the way he cradled her to his chest like she was the most precious thing in the world, my heart warmed and grew. It took extreme mental effort to remember where my head was at less than twenty-four hours ago. I had to remind myself of the doubts and questions I’d pondered while going to sleep last night. Part of me thought to make a list so I wouldn’t be able to forget and fall victim to his deception. Yet, another part of me turned that doubt onto myself, wondering if maybe I’d simply painted my own picture of Cash and his intentions just to see what I wanted to. Because if I used my eyes, I saw a decent man with the purest of intentions. If I used my heart, he was kind and giving, asking nothing of me but my company and very little time. Although, if I used my head, things became a jumbled mess until I had no idea what I was looking at.

While Aria napped, I ran a load of laundry, prepared dinner, and exchanged texts with Stevie. I’d told her about this morning, about Cash coming home early, fully aware she wouldn’t play devil’s advocate. But that was the problem with not having many friends in your life—your options of people to turn to when you needed unbiased advice were limited. It was always good to hear arguments from both sides, so only getting one opinion made things more difficult. Yet I trusted Stevie—she didn’t have an ulterior motive when discussing Cash—so I felt confident she’d given me the most solid advice she could.

I had a stack of clean clothes on the couch with my phone flipped open on the coffee table when the back door opened and Cash came in. He carried one brown bag by the handle, certainly not enough to have kept him out most of the day. Rather than offering a greeting, he took one look at me, set the bag down by the door, and headed into his room. And that’s where he stayed for close to ten minutes.

After taking my folded clothes to my room and putting them away, I came back to a text, asking me if Aria was awake and if I had time to talk. I quickly typed out my reply, my eyes dancing between the screen and his bedroom to keep an eye on his whereabouts, and then I pressed send.

Me: He’s in his room, but the door is open, so he might hear me. I have no idea what he’s doing in there. He came home and has been in there ever since.

While I sat on the couch, I kept my eyes glued to his open door until another text came through. It was odd, not making sense. I read it again before noticing the name of the sender.

Cash: If you’re talking about him, maybe he has a right to hear what you’re saying.

I felt sick to my stomach after going back to the last text, asking if I had time to talk, and realized it hadn’t been from Stevie. Had I taken one second or paid just a bit more attention, I would’ve seen his name, and could have kept myself from sticking my foot in my mouth.

Rather than wait for him to come to me, I pulled myself off the couch and slowly approached his room, where I found him sitting on the side of the bed, hunched forward with his head in his hands. I carefully made my way to him and took a seat on the mattress by his side. Not once did he look up or drop his hands.

“Did you think you were texting Stevie?” His voice was so low it resembled gravel being raked across pavement.

“Yeah. We were texting, so I didn’t pay attention to the name.”

“When I asked you earlier about moving back, you said you hadn’t discussed it with her. Was that a lie?” He turned his head to the side to regard me. “Tell me the truth, Jade. I think I deserve that at this point. If you’re planning on leaving, I have a right to know.”

And he did. He’d spent so much time and money turning the back bedrooms into what they were for Aria and me. The detail that had gone into her room alone was enough to make me feel like a horrible person for even contemplating going back.

“You’re right, and I’m sorry. You paid a lot of money for furniture and a decorator—”

“Stop.” He finally dropped his hands and pressed them into the mattress on either side of his hips, straightening his spine and squaring his shoulders. The muscles in his arms bulged and strained against the sleeves of his shirt. “This isn’t about the money. Forget about that. Just tell me what I’ve done to push you away. Something happened, Jade. We were fine Sunday night, but for some reason, when I woke up this morning, it was like you already had your bags packed. I’m willing to bet that had I not come back early, I would’ve walked into an empty house.”

This had been easier when I planned it in my head. When you avoid confrontation, it makes dealing with things so much harder. But I’d managed to get myself here, and he was right—he deserved an explanation. “I haven’t made up my mind yet. So it wasn’t a complete lie. I’ve just been thinking about a lot of things and how some of what you’ve told me just doesn’t add up.”

He grabbed my hand and held it on the bed between us, the heat from his palm soaking into my skin. When my gaze found his pleading eyes, I couldn’t look away. It made everything hit me harder when he said, “Then talk to me about it. I have no idea what you’ve discussed with Stevie or anyone else, so I don’t have a clue what they’ve told you. But something has you ready to run for the hills, and all I’m asking for is a chance to possibly offer you some clarification. Maybe I can help you add it up so you stop looking at me like I’m going to hurt you.”

I had to turn away, unable to hold his gaze and confess the ridiculous reasons that led me to question him. “Yes, I’ve talked to Stevie about it. When she came over yesterday, she asked me what your motivation was to let me live here rent free. I couldn’t answer her because I don’t know. When she suggested I look online to make sure what you’ve told me hasn’t been a bunch of lies, I started to think about my inability to do so. Then I began to question why a network engineer wouldn’t have a computer in his home. It gave me some doubts.”

He withdrew his hand and leaned toward his nightstand without saying a word. After opening the doors on the bottom, he pulled out a laptop with a hard, black case covering the top and bottom. And I immediately felt like a moron.

“You’ve never asked or made any comments about needing to use one, so I never thought to tell you about it. But here you go.” He held it out for me and waited until I took it, until I cradled it in my lap while staring at the image of an apple on the center of the lid. “I keep it right there, but you’re more than welcome to use it. The power cord is in there, too.”

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, not sure what else to say.

“No need to apologize. But there’s no way you got yourself this worked up over a computer. There’s got to be more. Don’t stop now; keep going. Anything you’ve questioned or Stevie has brought up, ask. If I can, I’d love nothing more than to clear the air now, rather than drag this out and chance you packing up and leaving.”

He was right. And the more I held back, the longer the doubt would linger. “You’ve told me what you do, but I have no idea what company you work for. When you’re gone, I call you on your cell because you work in the field, but is there a main number to the office? Is there even an office?”

“It’s called WireComm—wireless communications. And yes, there’s an office with people who answer phones.” He stood, walked to his closet, and disappeared inside for a moment before returning with a business card. “That’s the number. If you call, they’ll either dispatch it to my cell or take a message, to which they just send me a text. That’s why I never give out the main number, because it’s no different than calling me directly.”

I pinched the card between my fingers and held it in front of me, pretending to read the words printed on the front. Really, I didn’t care what it said. I’d convinced myself he’d lied about his job, and this just proved me wrong.

“Go ahead, call the number and ask for me.”

“I don’t need to, Cash.”

“Jade…” He angled his body toward me and dipped his chin, bringing his eyes level with mine. “You’ve already told me you question if what I’ve said is the truth or not. And you and I both know there’s no way to truly prove I’m not lying unless you do more than just believe the words I say. So please, call the number and ask for me.”

I set the computer down behind me on the mattress and flipped open my phone. The call rang in my ear twice before a woman answered. “WireComm, how may I direct your call?”

Peering into the midnight eyes next to me, I said, “Cash Nicholson, please.”

The sound of her typing on a keyboard filled the line. “I’m sorry, he’s off duty right now. If you’d like, I could take a message.”

“Oh, it’s more of a personal call. He, uh…he owes me money.” I sucked at lying on the spot.

Overhearing the conversation, Cash closed his eyes and shook his head with a smirk tugging at his lips.

“I can send you through to his voicemail if you’d like?”

“Please. That’d be great.” I made sure to stop talking before doing any more damage.

A few beeps resounded seconds before his screen lit up in his hand. It rang in my ear as well as in the room. I disconnected the call, satisfied at the uncertainty of his job being cleared up. While I sat there with my phone in my hand, he waited me out patiently, sensing there was more I needed to say or ask.

I bit my lip, steadied my focus on the corner of the baseboard leading into his bathroom, and took a breath. “Do you talk to your parents? Like…are you close with them?”

“Of course. I mean, I’m as close to them as I can be with them living in another state and me being gone so much. We talk, though. And I see them every Christmas. What would you like to know about them?”

This just seemed silly and made me look paranoid. And unless I planned to call all his relatives to verify what he told me, there was no use in bringing it up. “Nothing. It doesn’t matter.” I didn’t even get my rear end to the edge of the mattress when he carefully halted my movement with a gentle hand around my upper arm.

“It does matter, Jade. Whatever you’re thinking, it means something to you. I have no problem answering any questions you have about my job or my family or how I grew up. Don’t be embarrassed or worried about how it’ll sound.” He must’ve noticed the burning in my cheeks, and I wished I could’ve blamed it on the sun.

Realizing I needed to get this over with, my posture slumped with a rushed sigh, and I closed my eyes, bracing myself to just lay it all out there for him. “I just never hear you talk about them other than in stories about when you were younger, and it caused me to question things.” It suddenly dawned on me that I was a hypocrite, considering I never talked about mine, either. “Plus, you said you’re lonely, so I guess that made me think you were estranged from your family, which led me to wonder why.”

“That makes sense, and I can see why you felt that way. But my parents still live in Georgia, and I’m all the way down here. It’s not like I can just stop over at their house for dinner. They call when they have something to tell me, and I do the same, but my dad’s not the kind of guy who likes to talk on the phone, and my mom stays busy in her community.”

“Then I guess my question would be…when you left your wife, why didn’t you move closer to them? Why here where you don’t have anyone, instead of with your family who could help you through the divorce?”

“Because I had this house already, so there was no point in getting another one. And I wasn’t about to move in with my parents at my age. I love them and all, but I’ve been on my own for the last twelve years. It’d be one thing if I needed their help, but I didn’t.”

God, I both loved and hated how all his answers made sense.

“That brings me to this house.” I glanced around his room, avoiding him completely. “Why’d your grandfather give it to you, and why didn’t you ever live here when you were married?”

“Well, I used to spend summers with him here when I was a kid, so I assume that’s why he chose me. But honestly, I have no idea why he had his will the way he did. I was informed about it by my dad, who was the executor of the estate. No one had any gripes about me taking it, so I did. As for why I didn’t live here when I was married…I was twenty-one when I was given the deed to this house. I’d just started my job and traveled a lot. The house is old, and it hadn’t been taken care of very well in Granddad’s later years, so it needed a lot of work. I didn’t have the time to put into it, nor did I have the money. The property taxes were about all I could afford that first year.

“I’d met Colleen when I was twenty-two, and married her a year later. She already owned a home, and when I mentioned this place, she said she had no desire to relocate. She had friends in town, and if we came here, she wouldn’t have anyone—plus, she’d have to spend a lot of time updating the place. She wasn’t interested in it, and we never spoke about it again. So I moved in with her and continued to let this house sit empty.”

“When did you fix it up?”

He drew my attention when he shifted on the bed, turning his entire body to face me with his leg pulled up between us, his foot hanging off the edge of the mattress. “Over the years, I’d do things here and there, but nothing major since no one ever stayed here. It started after someone had vandalized the outside. They used spray paint on the walls and smashed the front window. Obviously, I had to get that taken care of, and then after repainting the outside and replacing all the doors and windows, I just kept it up—one thing at a time. There was a leak in the ceiling in the back bedroom, so I had to get a new roof. The carpets smelled because the electricity had been off for so long that the moisture in the house from the humidity soaked into them, so I ripped it up and put down wood. After that, I couldn’t leave it empty without running the air conditioner, so I replaced that.”

“And your wife had no clue where all this money was going?”

It was his turn to drop his gaze, but I wasn’t sure if it was because of embarrassment or a need to contemplate his answer. But while he studied the fabric of his comforter, he said, “Before we got married, but after I’d proposed, I learned of her spending habits. She’d accumulated quite a bit of debt and had several maxed-out credit cards. She lived well above her means. I spoke to my parents about it, because they’d raised me to be financially conscious, and they suggested I protect my assets. It wasn’t that I believed we’d get divorced and sought to keep her from gaining anything. My worry was that she’d blow through my savings, and I’d be left scrambling to pick up the pieces. At that time, I was making decent money, but not enough to last too long if she had unlimited access to it. And as far as this house, my dad was concerned a bank could put a lien on it because of marital property.”

“So what’d you do?” I found myself enthralled with his every word.

“My mom opened a bank account in her name and gave me access to it. Colleen never pushed the issue to open a joint checking or savings account, just asked that I made sure the bills were paid. So I paid her mortgage, car loan, and all the other household bills, which let her keep every paycheck she earned to do with as she pleased. I put this house in my dad’s name after having a lawyer draw up a contract that would protect us both.”

“That’s a lot of hoops to jump through to keep things from the woman you planned to marry and spend the rest of your life with.” Out of everything he’d told me, that was the one thing that left a sour taste in my mouth. If he was willing to be so deceitful to the person he claimed to love, I couldn’t imagine the lengths he’d go to so he could lie to me, someone he barely knew.

“I have really good instincts about people, but back then, I think I was just learning how to listen to them. Now, I can look back and see the writing on the wall, but at the time, I was young and in love. I refused to believe she would hurt me. It’d been my parents’ persuasion that made me do all those things in the first place. Trust me…I fought them. In my mind, I was only worried about the money I’d been saving for years, not caring to have that wasted on shoes Colleen didn’t need, or her purse collection that she kept in the corner of her closet. They convinced me to do it, saying we could reverse it at any time, but that they felt it was needed for at least the first two years. That’s the only reason I agreed.”

“But you never changed it?”

He shook his head and sucked in a full inhalation before relaxing his shoulders again. “Nah. I’d gotten used to the way things were and never really thought about it again. It wasn’t like I needed to have my name on all those things, and Colleen had no idea they even existed.”

“So this house is still in your dad’s name?” When he nodded, something hit me that I hadn’t thought about before. “You said he’s full Italian. So where did Nicholson come from? That doesn’t sound like a very Italian name.”

A slow smile stretched across his chiseled face, bringing my attention to the shadow of scruff he’d yet to shave. “My dad was adopted.” His answer almost made me roll my eyes, but I refrained in lieu of hearing him out. “His biological parents were both really young—I don’t remember how old they were, though. Anyway, they had to go back to Italy to deal with a family emergency, but they couldn’t take their baby with them. I was told their families didn’t know they had a baby, and for whatever reason, they couldn’t tell them. So they decided to leave my dad, who was only a few months old, with an older couple who lived next door until they came back. But they never returned, so the neighbors ended up adopting him.”

As much as I wished I could pick apart the story and find holes, reassuring me it was a lie, that was hard to do. So I just sat there and nodded slowly, letting it all sink in. He must’ve sensed my hesitation, because he pushed himself off the mattress, walked around me to the dresser against the wall across from the bed, and grabbed a framed photo from the corner. When he handed it to me, I realized I could try to pick his words apart until the end of time, but I wouldn’t find any holes.

Behind the glass sat a picture of an older man with green eyes so bright they reminded me of grass in the spring, just coming back to life after a dry winter. His skin was light and his hair a copper color. To the side, slightly in front of him, stood another man, younger than the first. His short, black hair was combed to the side with an off-center part, reminding me very much of Cash’s, just worn in a different style. His eyes squinted with his infectious grin, making it appear that the image had been snapped mid-laugh. So much about this man, from his olive skin color to his muscular build resembled Cash, who I assumed was the child in the photo, standing in front of both men. They all looked happy, and I could tell they were a family, even though it was obvious the eldest didn’t share the same blood.

I handed it back to him with a smile.

After returning the frame to its original place, he ran his finger along the edge and came back to sit next to me, facing me. “What other concerns or doubts do you have?”

I was amazed at how much of an open book he was, considering he’d always come across so closed off—guarded. He’d given me opportunities to ask questions before, and even though I had, I’d never expected him to be so willing to offer such personal information. Then again, that wasn’t his fault. It was mine for assuming.

With only one question left weighing on my mind, I opened my mouth and asked, “Why did you offer to let me live here?” I held out my hand to stop him from responding before I could clarify my question. “I understand you were looking for a roommate and the rent check wasn’t important to you, but why me? You were aware I didn’t have a job, no income, and I’d be bringing along a two-year-old. Good deeds aside, you had to have some motivation behind your decision. Anyone else would’ve walked out of that restaurant, but you didn’t, and for the life of me, I can’t figure out a reasonable explanation that doesn’t make you look either pathetic or criminal.”

Cash dropped his chin close to his chest. At first, I thought it was to shield me from seeing the truth in his eyes, but when his shoulders began to bounce and he lifted his head to reward me with the same squinty eyes as the man in the photo, I recognized the humor he’d found in my question.

“I must be pathetic because I’m not a criminal.” His laughter slowed when I couldn’t bring myself to join him.

“I’m being serious, Cash.”

“So am I, Jade.” He swallowed so harshly his Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat, his gaze now set to the open doorway leading out to the empty living room. I wasn’t sure if he was looking at something or staring off into the distance, but I could tell by the way his eyes softened, whatever ran through his mind wasn’t a joke. “In all honesty, I enjoyed our conversations and found you incredibly easy to talk to, which was exactly what I was looking for in a roommate. I thought you were funny and you made me laugh.”

“So you’re saying you only offered me a room because I made you laugh?”

“That…and I found myself looking forward to your calls and texts. That’s when I realized, lies or not, I was interested in seeing it through. And somehow, during that month we talked on the phone, I guess I started seeing you as a friend. You were literally the perfect roommate. But before I moved forward, I had to see your face.”

“Why? To make sure I wasn’t an ogre?”

He shook his head, lips pulled wide in a contagious smile. “No. Honestly, I was hoping you were.” He must’ve sensed the question burning the tip of my tongue, because he continued to explain. “Considering I was only looking for a friend, someone to talk to and spend the weekends with, it would’ve been a deal-breaker if I found that person sexually attractive.”

“Oh…” I whispered, the wind in my sails falling flat.

He placed his warm palm over my hand and met my stare. “That came out wrong. To me, personally, there’s a big difference between a beautiful woman and someone I’m physically attracted to. With that being said, I find lots of women good looking, ones I would even testify in court as being drop-dead gorgeous, yet I don’t have any desire to be with them romantically—or physically. That’s all I was trying to say.”

Which translated into “I don’t ever think about you naked.”

“No, I totally get it. You went looking for a roommate, not a bed buddy. Sex complicates everything, so it makes complete sense.” I tried my best to shove down the insecurities and ignore the bruise to my self-esteem. He hadn’t said I was ugly, just that he’d never have sex with me—because he had no desire to. “Trust me, I’m the one who had a baby at twenty and now has to care for her all alone. So you don’t have to explain anything to me.”

His eyes shifted between mine as though he tried to read my mind. He did say he was good at reading people, so I only hoped I had been convincing enough. The last thing I wanted to do was make him think I felt rejected, because that would mean I’d thought about sleeping with him.

“Okay…so you met me and realized there was nothing to worry about on that front. But then I told you about Aria and how I didn’t have a job. And still, you offered me a place to stay. Why? Why open your home to a woman who admittedly lied about several things? Someone you had no ties to, no obligations to help? A single mother with no income. I don’t understand your motivation.”

“You needed a place to stay, Jade,” he said quietly, holding my stare as if his answer was the most obvious and I was blind to have not seen it. “You and your baby were sleeping on a couch. You had to pee in a sink—and not just any sink, but in the kitchen, where I’m sure you had no privacy. You needed a room, and I needed a roommate.”

I licked my lips and hesitated, needing the answer to one final question. “Then why are you so against me moving back? If Stevie got a bigger place, I wouldn’t be in the same situation. So really, you shouldn’t have any reason to want me to stay…but you do. What is it?”

His gaze swung once again to the open doorway, but rather than stare off into the distance, he blinked and allowed his posture to practically melt. His smooth forehead relaxed until not one muscle in his entire face strained, betraying the sorrow that danced in his eyes.

“I can’t imagine being here every weekend without Aria.”