“Anyway…the cell reception sucks here, so if you don’t hear from me much, that’s why. But I’ll call you at night from my room.” Cash’s smooth voice lingered through the line and plastered a smile on my face.

A wave washed over my feet, and when it drew back into the ocean, I watched the tiny bubbles pop up beneath the sand around my toes. “That’s okay. I’m hoping to wear Aria out today at the beach so she’ll go to bed on time tonight. She’s been in one of her moods.” Like every Monday.

“I still think you’re making this shit up. She never acts like that when I’m home.”

“Yeah, yeah.” I giggled and watched my daughter run up to me, the floaties around her arms and chest making her waddle. “Speaking of the devil, I think she wants to talk to you.” I passed Aria the phone and listened while she blabbered on about jumping and waves and crashing. At least, I assumed she’d said “crash.” It could’ve very well been “Cash.”

“She’s cute,” a voice came from just over my shoulder. When I glanced behind me, I noticed a woman, couldn’t have been much older than me. Standing near her, watching Aria walk in circles while holding the phone to her ear, was a little boy. And it dawned on me that this was the woman and child I’d seen a couple of weeks ago after my phone call with Stevie.

She was striking. Her long, dark hair was the color of a midnight sky, and her creamy complexion set off the most alluring green eyes I’d ever seen. Women paid thousands to have a nose that perfect, and when I took in the rest of her, there didn’t seem to be a flaw anywhere. But what caught my attention even more than her tiny frame and petite build was the ginger who accompanied her. Her son’s fiery-red mop was in desperate need of a cut, but the way the sun reflected off it made him appear angelic. I couldn’t help but notice his large, brown irises and the smattering of freckles that dotted his face and arms. But where she was rather short, he was exceptionally tall. The only thing hinting at his younger age was the innocence in his sad eyes.

“Thank you.” I beamed at her and then held out my hand. “I’m Jade, and that’s my daughter, Aria.”

Her soft hand held mine before she gave it a slight squeeze, which kept me from feeling like I’d held a limp noodle. She had a good shake, which immediately earned my respect. “I’m Cora, and this is Legend. He’s five. How old’s your little girl?”

“Oh, she’s two and a half.” Just then, Aria came back, holding the phone in my direction. I pressed it to my ear long enough to hear Cash say he had to go and that he’d call me later. After saying goodbye, I flipped it closed and tossed it into the beach bag sitting in the sand next to Aria’s toy shovel and pail.

Legend and Aria played in the surf while Cora and I regarded them and fell into easy conversation. “He’s having a hard time adjusting…” Her gaze cut to mine before shifting back onto her son. “He’s used to being home, and now that he’s in school, I’ve been in a battle with him almost every day of the week.”

“That sounds familiar—except the school part,” I added with a laugh. “We actually just moved here a couple of months ago…” I pointed behind us to the house across the street. “And I just recently got a part-time job at the library, so Aria hasn’t adjusted to that yet.”

“Oh, that sounds like fun.”

“Once a month they host a kids’ theater. They have games and activities…you should bring Legend one night and check it out. I’ll grab more information for you tomorrow when I get there. I’m sure he’ll love it.”

“That sounds amazing. Thanks.” Her smile was gentle and sincere, and I knew right then and there I’d found a friend.

We talked a little more while the kids played together, then she announced that she had to leave. Her husband would be coming home so they had to get back and clean off. It was getting late, and Aria would need to be fed and bathed, but I wasn’t ready to go home. The silence in the house was stifling on Mondays. So I relaxed in the sand on a towel and fell in love with my child all over again while watching her scoop water up in a green pail, only to dump it out and repeat the process all over again.

Just after five, I called her over to head back across the street.

After Aria was cleaned off and fed, I went into the laundry room to wash her suit and towel. The sight of the tote sitting on top of the washer—riddled with sand both inside and out—reminded me of the phone I’d tossed inside after Aria’s conversation with Cash earlier. I dug around the sunscreen and lotion, random hair ties, and a few sippy cups half-filled with water before taking everything out. Once I had every last item placed on top of the dryer, I realized my phone wasn’t there. I’d interrogated Aria, accusing her of removing it, but she never copped to it. Then, like a slap in the face, I remembered the pail she’d played with. After she’d handed the phone back and I said goodbye to Cash, I’d tossed it in, not paying attention to where it had landed. And if it had managed to get inside the bucket…

All I could think about was Aria filling it with water and dumping it out.

And my phone—as cheap as it was, the only thing I could afford for myself—washed away at sea. I groaned, praying I was wrong, hoping I’d stuffed it into my pocket and it’d fallen out somewhere in the house. But that was a pipe dream.

I’d been looking forward to my paycheck ever since the moment I’d gotten the job. Just the thought of putting money back into my account gave me a sense of peace. The thought of spending it on a phone left me frustrated beyond belief. I’d gone back and forth about what to do. My savings was depleting on a weekly basis, and I only got paid twice a month—and the amount wasn’t much—so I’d decided to forgo the phone. I figured I’d wait until I had gotten the bank account into a place where I no longer stressed about how much milk Aria drank.

In the end, I didn’t have much of a social life, so there was really no point in having a cell. The only two people I spoke to were Cash and Stevie, both of whom had email addresses I could use to correspond with in the meantime. Aside from them, I didn’t care if I missed a call from my mother, and it wasn’t like I couldn’t inform the library of my situation and request they reach me by email if necessary. I had Cash’s computer, so at least I’d be able to keep in touch that way until I could afford the luxury of replacing the phone.

After putting Aria to bed, I snuck into Cash’s room—it never stopped feeling strange to go in there when he wasn’t home—and grabbed the laptop. Even though it had a way to send and receive messages, I had no clue how to use it, nor did I have Cash’s number memorized, so I couldn’t send him a text that way. Instead, I resorted to the old-fashioned method of messaging and typed out an email, explaining what had happened with the phone, and asked him to help me figure out how to use iMessage on the account he’d set up for me.

By the next morning, I still hadn’t received a reply. Before heading off to work, I tried again, informing him that I’d be at the library until four, but I’d check my email when I got home. However, the only response I had waiting for me when I returned was from Stevie, who’d asked for my Apple username—she was smart enough to give me instructions on how to find it—and said she’d send me a message.

I actually had somewhat of a life prior to Aria, filled with advanced technology such as smartphones and computers, though none of which were made by Apple. Cash had laughed at me at first, saying I was a visitor from the past, which was exactly how I felt when using his laptop. But I’d gotten the last laugh when I’d introduced him to Netflix.

Before going to bed Tuesday night, I tried again. I assumed he must’ve been busy or the cell reception was even worse at the hotel, but I figured as long as I sent him emails, he’d at least get them at some point.

Cora found me on the beach Wednesday and sat with me while the waves wore Aria out. She asked for my number, and I sheepishly explained how I was currently without a phone. The pity in her stare nearly killed me, especially since I’d just gotten through spilling most of my life to her—leaving out the heavy parts only Stevie had been privy to—but I could tell she hadn’t meant it to come across that way. Instead, she told me where her house was, just down the street, and we made plans to meet up next week. I couldn’t hide my elation over having a new friend.

I wasn’t tired, but by ten, I forced myself to go to sleep. I anticipated the next day would be long, despite my shifts only being six hours. Trying to parent and work was no easy feat, but thankfully, Aria had been elected the princess of Geneva Key Public Library. The other women fawned all over her, helping me when I needed it. She now also had her very own makeshift sleeping quarters in the storage room, too. But even with all that, it still took mental preparation before a workday.

A loud crash had me jolting upright in bed, the covers tossed to the side in an instinctual move to flee at the awakening sound. It was still dark outside, not enough light from the moon casting in to see more than a shadow when my bedroom door flung wide open and bounced off the wall. I never shut it all the way in case Aria needed me in the mornings, which had left me vulnerable to the man entering my room. The natural reaction for most was to scream, but I couldn’t. Pushed up on one hand, my arm extended and elbow locked behind me, not even covered by the sheets that now sat piled in the middle of the bed, I was frozen in fear. My mouth hung open, but not a sound came out. Time seemed to pass in slow motion, although it couldn’t have all happened in more than two or three seconds.

The shadow of a large man with wide, broad shoulders moved from the doorway into my personal space. He stalked toward me, practically crossing the room in only a few strides of his long legs until he was on top of me. I closed my eyes tightly and pressed my hands to his chest in a lame attempt to push him away while he sat half on the bed, straddling my legs with one foot still planted on the floor. But the moment his hand came to cradle my face, my skin basking in the warmth of his panicked words, I lost every ounce of will to fight.

“Are you okay? Fuck, Jade…tell me you’re all right,” he begged while quickly running his hands over me—my face, my shoulders, arms and legs. It was as if he’d found me in a ditch, thrown from a car, taking my last breath, and he had to inspect me from head to toe.

I wasn’t sure where the fear had come from, but as soon as I turned to the side and noticed the red digits on the clock next to the bed telling me it was after four in the morning, my first thought was Aria…and my own panic ensued. I must’ve said her name aloud, because in an instant, Cash was off the bed, storming back through the doorway into the hall. I followed him, stopping just outside her room, and with bated breath, watched Cash in the glow of her nightlight lean over the tiny bed. When he stood, his posture deflated, his shoulders no longer holding the same rigidness as before. And in his audible sigh, I felt his relief. She was safe.

He moved into the hallway, and I took a step back, giving him space to pull the door enough to leave her a crack for the morning. As soon as he stood in front of me, he tugged me against him, his arms around my shoulders, his hands woven in my hair as he held me to his hard chest. His whispered words settled over me like a comforting blanket when he said, “I was so worried, Jade.”

I pushed against him just enough to peer into his eyes, made darker by the shadows cast in the unlit hallway. “I don’t understand? Why were you worried? What happened?” Then it dawned on me. Being startled from sleep didn’t leave me with much cognizant thought about what day it was. “You’re home early…why? Is everything okay?”

Rather than answer me, he took my hand, laced our fingers together, and led me to my room, past the dilapidated baby gate that now lay in a crumpled mess on the floor. In his haste to get to me, he must not have remembered its presence.

I headed for the bed, flipped on the lamp on the side table, and climbed onto the mattress with my knees bent, feet tucked beneath me. He followed behind me, but rather than sit like he had the other night, he dropped himself onto the edge of the bed, less than a foot in front of me, his feet still set on the floor, and threw himself onto his back with his arm hooked over his eyes.

“Are you going to tell me what’s going on?” Sleep still hung in my voice.

After a long sigh, he finally dropped his arm, but instead of looking at me, he kept his focus on the ceiling. “I haven’t talked to you since Monday afternoon. When I didn’t hear from you that night, I assumed you’d gone to bed early since you spent so long at the beach. But then you didn’t answer or return my calls on Tuesday. I started to get worried then, but I told myself you had work and had probably gotten busy when you got back home, so I tried to ignore it. I figured I was being paranoid. Until I couldn’t get ahold of you today. Your phone just kept going to voicemail, and I assumed something was wrong. I thought maybe your ex had found you or something.”

I slipped my hand into his, pressing our palms together, and earned his attention for the first time since we came back to my room. “I emailed you…several times. You didn’t get them?”

His brow furrowed while he stared at me. “No.” Before I could offer him the same reassurance he’d gifted me when I’d needed it, his voice lowered and he added, “Are you leaving? Is that why you haven’t answered my calls and only sent me emails? To tell me that what happened this weekend was too much and you’ve decided to leave?”

It was evident in not only his downtrodden tone, but also in his sorrowful gaze, that his question hadn’t been meant as an accusation, but rather, it came from a place of utter fear. I couldn’t explain it, but his deep concern over the possibility that I’d leave him did something to me. It gave me an inside glimpse into his feelings, and more than any touch he’d ever offered me, it let me believe he truly cared. There was no false hope on my part. It was as if he’d just given me his heart.

“Cash…I think Aria gave my phone to the fish.”

He blinked several times, probably trying to translate my words. In his defense, not only had I been in a deep sleep less than ten minutes ago, but I’d also been lost in the abstraction of his soft-spoken words, the sentiment hidden in his worry.

“After we spoke on Monday, I tossed my phone into my bag—well, it might’ve landed in the bucket next to the bag—and then later, Aria used the bucket to play in the water. I couldn’t find my phone after I got back, so I’m thinking she might’ve accidentally lost it at sea.”

Immense ease lightened his features until he lay completely relaxed across my bed.

“I sent you emails explaining what happened. Stevie helped me figure out the whole texting thing on the computer, but I haven’t memorized your number, so I couldn’t reach out that way, and when you never responded, I just assumed the cell service was bad everywhere.”

Irritation marred his brow, but I could tell it was directed at himself, not at me. “The email address you have is the one I use for family. I don’t have it set up for alerts, so I never got them. And I never thought to check it. My parents know to call if they need to get ahold of me and can’t wait until I go through my email.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t even consider how you might’ve reacted to my silence. Now I feel bad for making you leave work early. You didn’t get in trouble, did you?”

“Nah. I was just doing desk work—research and shit. Nothing exciting.”

“Do you have to go back?”

“I called my supervisor on my way out this morning, and he said just to keep him updated with what’s going on. But by the time I get back out there, I’ll just have to turn around and head home for the weekend. Kind of seems like a wasted trip to me. I’ll see what he says when I call him tomorrow.”

I glanced at the clock, watching the numbers creep toward five. “You mean today?”

Cash groaned and ran his hand down his face. Exhaustion plagued his eyes, but he didn’t appear to care. “So why haven’t you gotten a new phone yet?”

“I figured I don’t really need one, so there’s no point in rushing out and spending money I don’t have. Now that I’m driving more than I used to, I’m having to get gas more frequently, and even though Aria is basically potty trained, she’s still in pull-ups at night—and those aren’t cheap. I decided to wait until I can get a few paychecks deposited so I’m not feeling like I’m working for free while still draining the account.”

“You need a phone, Jade.” He narrowed his gaze on me. “What’s your plan if something happens and you have to call for help?”

I shrugged, not having given that any thought when debating the phone situation earlier in the week. “I guess run next door and ask them to call?”

“So if Aria starts choking…your plan is to go door to door until you find someone to call nine-one-one?” It meant a lot that he cared this deeply for the safety of my child, although I couldn’t help feeling like he somehow looked down on me or my parenting for not having thought about it. But he didn’t give me a chance to speak before squeezing my hand and softening his tone, adding, “We’ll go tomorrow to get you a new one.”

“There’s got to be another alternative, Cash. Your question was legitimate, but so is the fact I don’t always have a phone on me. I don’t handle fear well—as proven by my lack of fight or flight instincts when you came barging in here tonight. I freeze up. So it’s not very likely I’d even remember where my cell is in a situation like that.”

“We’ll figure something out.”

I had no idea what options I had, but this wasn’t the time to think about them—not at nearly five in the morning when I had Cash lying on my bed. I was ready to curl up and sleep, but I’d missed him and his company, and I wasn’t willing to give that up just yet.

“I’m sorry for worrying you,” I whispered.

He blinked at me for a moment, and then released my hand to prop himself up. His face was so close to mine, yet it didn’t feel close enough. With his free hand, he carefully ran his knuckles down my cheek, stilling at my chin where he held it between his thumb and forefinger. “I’m sorry for barging in here and scaring you.”

I tried to brush it off, but I couldn’t even manage enough strength to lift one shoulder. “It’s fine. I mean, that’s what roommates do, right? They don’t hear from the other in…” I paused to make the lamest attempt at mental calculation before adding, “Roughly thirty-six hours, and then race home in the middle of the night to check on them. At least, that’s how it should be.”

It was meant to be funny, but he didn’t laugh. He didn’t even show a glimmer of a smile. In fact, there was not a hint of humor to be found in his entire expression. His eyes remained on mine, holding the intense stare for longer than what was considered comfortable. It was obvious he had something to say—or he’d fallen asleep sitting up with his eyes open. That was a definite possibility. But then his gaze dropped to my mouth, and his breathing sped up.

“I have to tell you something, Jade.” His voice was heavy, full of grit, and it made my chest constrict painfully, feeling as though I was being crushed by a wrecking ball. “I broke a rule…one of yours.”

“Which one?” My fear increased with each second that ticked by.

His eyes never left my lips when he uttered, “I fell in love.”

The weight on my chest crushed my ribs, collapsed my lungs, and freed my heart. None of the common-sense questions mattered—his lack of sexual attraction toward me being on the top of that list. I’d heard the words I never thought would come out of his mouth, and nothing else existed. I wanted him to kiss me. He was right there, eyes on the prize, but he didn’t. And that was the one thing that halted my excitement.

He either regretted this, or he was just as scared.

My money was on fear. This had likely come as a surprise to him, and I wouldn’t doubt he was in the midst of trying to sort through the confusion. I didn’t care to make matters worse by moving too fast or pushing too hard. I’d be devastated if I awoke in the morning and learned he’d changed his mind—or worse, had confused his worry over my safety as something more.

So I decided to play it by ear, test him, have some fun to see if the moment passed. “Oh, yeah? Does this mean we’ll have another roommate? I won’t have to give up my bed, will I? Because as much as I love Aria’s room, I don’t think we’ll both fit on her mattress.”

Finally, his lips curled at the corners, and I rejoiced in the sight. “No, you won’t have to share a room with Aria.”

Still not satisfied—and also enjoying his smile, wanting it to last a little longer—I kept up the charade. “So I guess you’ll be moving her into your room, then? I mean, I’ll share my bed if I have to, just as long as she doesn’t hog the covers.”

Humor danced in his eyes. He was enjoying this as much as I was. “Where she sleeps is entirely up to her. I’d love to fall asleep next to her, but I plan to follow her lead.”

I soaked up his words, realizing he had turned this game into an easy, uncomplicated conversation full of answers without the insecurities brought on by making it personal. As long as we spoke about the woman he’d confessed to falling in love with as if she were someone else, we’d be able to better navigate this situation.

“And when did you realize you had feelings for her?”

“Well, I guess you could say it was Friday night.” When my body tensed—a natural reaction to assuming he’d confused love with whatever he felt after hearing about Aria’s father—he dropped his hand from my chin and placed it on my knee. “But that’s not when it all started, Jade. You asked when I realized it.”

“So you’re saying you felt something for her prior to that night?”

“Absolutely. And I hope that doesn’t come as a surprise to her.”

“Why would you think it wouldn’t?”

“Because it was obvious. When I finally opened my eyes and recognized it for myself, I was shocked at how blatant I was about my feelings for her. I honestly have no idea why it took me so long to see it for myself.”

I hesitated, only because I worried my next words would blur the line we’d created and leave me vulnerable to his response. But I needed all the facts, so I took a deep breath and went for it. “Knowing you, I’m sure you told her you didn’t find her sexually appealing—beautiful, but not in the way that excites you. So maybe you’re giving yourself too much credit by assuming it was obvious.”

He sat up straighter, this conversation taking a sharp turn toward the land of seriousness. “True, but I’d hope my actions had spoken louder than my asinine words. The ugly truth is this…I’ve been around women who I thought were very good looking. But rather than salivate at their assets or physical features, I’d simply take note of their beauty. Then there were women who just did it for me. I didn’t need to learn their names before picturing all the ways I could fuck them. That’s what I meant when I said sexually attractive.”

“Yeah…” I dragged the word out, quirking an eyebrow at him. “I’m not sure how to take that. Neither sounds all that flattering.”

At least it got him grinning again. He dropped his chin and shook his head, a breathy chuckle escaping through his teeth. “No, it doesn’t. But I guess that just goes to show you men aren’t all that complicated where sex is concerned.”

“Okay, so you could admire her, but she didn’t leave you with the need to rip her clothes off. Got it. Now how did you get from there to falling in love with her? I think that’s what’s most important here.”

“I’m not sure if there’s an answer for that. Part of it might be maturity. I hadn’t allowed myself to look at anyone in that way since I was twenty-two. During my marriage, I never entertained those thoughts about other women—I wasn’t really around any, other than Colleen’s friends. If I wasn’t at work, I was home with her.”

I rolled my eyes in disbelief. “You can’t be serious, Cash. Married people still have eyes.”

“Yes, that’s true. If I were at a store or out with Colleen and an attractive woman was there, I’d notice. But that’s all it was. Nothing more than a simple thought about another human being. I wouldn’t think about her beyond that or entertain any explicit fantasies with her in it. Who knows…maybe I hadn’t been single long enough to entertain the thought of having sex with someone else, so when I saw…her for the first time, sex wasn’t even on my mind. Or there’s always the possibility that I’d already connected with her on a different level, so my focus wasn’t on the physical aspects.”

“All great answers, Cash. But I’m willing to bet she won’t believe any of them…no matter how true they might be. It doesn’t change the fact you saw her as a friend, nothing more, and then all of a sudden, out of the clear blue, you change your mind.”

“It wasn’t like that.”

“Then how was it? Because to me—and I’m not her, so I can’t speculate how she’d take it—it sounds like she might’ve opened up to you about something personal, something I’m assuming you might’ve had a reaction to…maybe anger on her behalf…and your wires got crossed. Sympathy isn’t love, Cash.”

“I’m well aware of that. But in order for me to have confused the two, my realization would’ve had to come after her ‘possible’ admission. And considering I saw the writing on the wall before that conversion may or may not have happened, I can absolutely, without a doubt, say I didn’t get my wires crossed.”

“Before?” I wasn’t sure I’d be able to get the word out. I couldn’t get enough oxygen into my lungs, and my heart had picked that moment to finally believe him, tapping out a beat that rivaled the tempo of a techno song.

“Yeah.” He nodded, so sure of himself. “Before. We were on the couch, and when I looked at her, it was like my heart stopped trying to deny it. It was always there, I just never saw it for what it was. But that was the moment I couldn’t lie to myself any longer. I couldn’t make up an excuse for the feelings I had while staring into her eyes. Before that, when I found myself thinking of what she looked like beneath her clothes, I chalked it up to curiosity, wondering if I’d be able to see the evidence of the life she created. When I caught myself thinking about her at night while trying to fall asleep, I told myself it was because I hadn’t seen her or spoken to her in a while. But that night, with her in my arms, I had no excuse for what I felt inside.”

I cleared my throat, hoping to hide the way his words affected me. But as soon as I spoke, there was no doubt I’d failed. “Well, I’m pretty sure she might believe that. If you’re lucky. I mean, it could go either way.”

“Any idea what she’d say?”

“It depends.”

“On what?”

“Whether or not you kiss her after you tell her all that.”

His gaze fell to my mouth again, and I took that moment to trace my bottom lip with my tongue. Something akin to hunger flashed in his eyes, but it wasn’t sinister like I was used to seeing. And it bathed me in a fiery desire I’d never experienced.

“Should I kiss her?”

I nodded, eagerly. “Yes, you sh—” And before I could finish my sentence, his mouth was on mine.