---

Music thumped from large speakers at one end of the bar. Laughter and shouted conversations surrounded Jenny as she weaved her way through the crowd. Gail pointed in the direction of a table in one corner, where Ruth and Antonia were deep in conversation. Naomi was nowhere to be seen.

Antonia looked up and waved at them. ‘We used to have two friends that looked like you.’

‘Yes, sorry, there was a… er… a queue.’ Jenny could barely look at her. ‘Does anyone want another drink?’ She was certainly in need of another. A large one.

‘Naomi has just gone up to the bar,’ said Ruth. ‘If you catch her, she can add your drinks to the order.’

Gail put a hand on Jenny’s arm. ‘I’ll go. Vodka and tonic?’

‘Yes, please.’ Jenny sat down again and tried to shake off her stupor. Geoff, Antonia’s husband, was the father of Gail’s child. She had wanted revelations, but this one was off the scale. Now it wasn’t just Naomi she was worried about; she had to keep Gail quiet, too. Gail and Antonia must be kept apart; if they weren’t alone, Gail couldn’t tell her. All Jenny had to do was keep the conversation light and away from any topics which might veer into dangerous territory. Act normal, act normal. ‘Have we missed anything?’

‘Nothing much. Naomi has been queuing at the bar and Ruth’s giving me a bit of impromptu life coaching.’ As Ruth protested, Antonia patted her hand. ‘Just joking, darling.’

‘Tell me to mind my own business,’ said Jenny, ‘but why don’t you just leave him?’

Antonia shrugged. ‘What would I do? Honestly, Jenny, what would I do? I have never worked in my life – I married Geoff straight out of university and basically supported his career from that point on. I’ve entertained his colleagues, accompanied him on trips, shopped for gifts for his business contacts, but I’ve never had a real job. Quite frankly, I find the prospect of having to get one terrifying. I’m not—’ she raised her finger to stop Ruth from interrupting her—‘playing the society wife, afraid to chip a manicured fingernail. I mean that I am actually terrified.’

‘But you have a degree,’ Ruth insisted.

Antonia pulled a face. ‘In Art History. I’m not sure that qualifies you for a great deal. Anyway, it’s not just the job. It’s everything. Looking after Jess, living on my own. I’m just used to the way things are.’

Naomi and Gail arrived with the drinks and a tray of shots.

Gail held up her hands. ‘I couldn’t stop her.’ They pulled over two more seats and sat down.

‘The barman gave them to us for free.’ Naomi giggled. ‘I’ve already drunk mine.’

Already drunk hers? By Jenny’s reckoning, Naomi had had three glasses of wine and now this vile-looking concoction. If she was pregnant, she should not be drinking like that.

Ruth shook her head. ‘I’ll just be sick if I drink that.’

Antonia sniffed at her glass and then sipped at it. Jenny took one and downed it, grimacing at its sweet potency. Then she had Ruth’s, too. She needed it.

Naomi leaned forward eagerly. ‘I’ve had a great idea. Let’s play a game of Truth.’

Half an hour ago, Jenny would have relished this. What better way to get what she needed. Now, she wasn’t so sure. ‘Aren’t we all a bit old for that?’

Naomi wasn’t listening. ‘How many pennies have we got between us?’

Everyone looked into their purses and managed to produce a small pile of coins.

‘Okay, take five each. This is what you have to do.’ Naomi took a deep breath. ‘Each person has to say something that they have never done before, such as, erm, such as, “I have never been on a hot air balloon.” Then anyone who has been on a hot air balloon has to put one of her pennies into the middle. The winner is the person that is still left with pennies when everyone else has lost theirs.’

Jenny tried again to protest, but Antonia and Ruth were already sorting pennies into equal piles. There seemed an inevitability to this. Would they be so keen to take part if they knew what they might find out?

‘Okay, who wants to go first?’ This party animal was a new side to Naomi. Maybe breastfeeding had sucked the life out of her up until now. She was like a wind-up toy, newly released. ‘Ruth?’

‘Oh, er, okay.’ Ruth thought for a moment. ‘I have never… had anal sex!’

‘Hey, that’s cheating! I only told you that tonight – you can’t use it against me!’ Gail cried.

‘No, that’s the game!’ Naomi fidgeted in her chair like a small child. ‘We can use anything we know already – that’s why it’s fun. Come on. Money in the pot!’ Gail dropped a penny onto the beer mat in the middle of the table. ‘You can go next if you like?’

A wicked grin emerged on Gail’s face. ‘I have never had to have a tampon surgically removed.’ She looked triumphantly at Jenny.

‘You cow – I told you that in strictest confidence,’ protested Jenny, as she plopped a penny onto the mat. It had come out during a phone conversation, discussing periods and whether they’d restarted. Motherhood gave rise to some scintillating subjects.

‘Ouch.’ Antonia grimaced.

‘It’s not as bad as it sounds. I was only fourteen and the string broke. My doctor had to get it out with forceps.’

‘Ouch again.’ Antonia crossed her legs. ‘Thank God I didn’t have to go through any of that business with Jess.’

‘Jenny, your turn.’ Naomi was enjoying her role of playmaker.

‘Well, even though I’d love to get my own back on Gail, I’m afraid I don’t have any more inside info.’ Jenny faltered as she realised what a huge lie she had just told. ‘I’m going to have to take a stab in the dark. I have never slept with someone on a first date.’

All four women looked at each other guiltily and then, one by one, they put a penny in the middle. Jenny put her hands to her mouth in mock shock.

‘I doubt very much any of our one-night stands were much to write home about.’ Ruth pulled a being-sick face. ‘Mine was a waiter in Majorca.’

Antonia raised her glass. ‘A spotty history student during freshers’ week.’

Naomi giggled and brought hers up to join Antonia’s. ‘My brother’s best friend on a Scouts’ camping trip.’

Gail downed her drink and slammed her glass down on the table. ‘A slimy lawyer two months ago!’

Everyone collapsed into laughter. Either the wine and shots were starting to have an effect, or Jenny was feeling another glow of warmth towards these women. Maybe this game was a good idea after all. They should keep it going.

‘Whose turn is it next? Antonia?’

Antonia rolled her glass between her hands as she thought about it. ‘This is more difficult than you think.’

‘Is that because there’s very little you haven’t done?’ asked Ruth, cheekily.

Antonia laughed. ‘Okay, I’ll have to do a boring one. I have never lied to my parents.’

‘What, never?’ Naomi was incredulous. ‘I might as well put all my money in on that one.’

‘I don’t believe you,’ scoffed Gail. ‘I’m really close to my mum and even I’ve told a few white lies over the years. What about when you were a teenager? Never got drunk and then got a friend to call your parents with an excuse?’

‘Nope.’ Antonia shook her head. ‘I have never lied to them.’

Gail wouldn’t let it go. ‘Not telling them things, that counts as a lie. Have you told them about Geoff’s shenanigans?’

Jenny sucked in air. Please don’t do this.

Antonia didn’t falter. ‘Yes, as a matter of fact, I have.’

‘What?’ Gail was incredulous again. ‘You’ve told them and they haven’t told you to get the hell out of there?’

Antonia sipped her drink. ‘I told my mother. She… understood.’

The table went quiet and Jenny frantically tried to think of something to say: a funny question to ask or a story to tell. Not only because she didn’t like the silence, but because she didn’t want Gail to find a window for her own revelation.

Then Naomi took a deep breath and shared one of her own. ‘Well, I haven’t told my parents that I’m pregnant again and that I’m devastated about it.’

If the table was quiet before, it was in a vacuum of silence now. No one seemed to know what the appropriate response should be. Jenny focused on not looking anywhere near Ruth. She had been so preoccupied with Gail that she had forgotten to worry about Naomi. Why hadn’t she kept her mouth shut? What was Ruth thinking?

Ruth was the first to react. She became very red in the face and levelled a steely gaze in Naomi’s direction. ‘You’re pregnant again already? Was it planned?’

Naomi looked uncomfortable. ‘No. Not planned.’

Ruth picked up her glass and took a long drink.

Naomi sat up straight, fiddling with the neckline of her dress as if it was too tight for her. ‘I’m sorry. I don’t know why that came out. Just forget I said anything.’

Jenny knew that this wasn’t the first time Naomi had faced an unplanned pregnancy and she also knew how unhappy she was. But she couldn’t let on that she knew about it; Ruth might feel it had been purposely hidden from her. Jenny put a hand on Naomi’s arm. ‘I’m sure this has been a big shock for you, Naomi. It must be hard to get your head around it.’

‘Maybe you’re just worried that your body won’t cope with a pregnancy so soon after giving birth.’ Gail was also trying to help Naomi dig herself out; they all felt the weight of Ruth’s unrelenting stare.

‘It isn’t a physical issue,’ Naomi explained reluctantly. ‘I’m just not sure how I’m going to cope with two small children. I’m not sure that I even want another…’

Before she could say any more, Ruth stood up, threw the rest of her drink over Naomi, and walked out of the bar.

---

‘Should I go after her?’ Jenny tried to help Naomi absorb some of the drink on her dress with the cheap bar napkins. Naomi was crying and Antonia was patting her on the back gently.

‘No, I think we just leave her to her own thoughts for a while,’ said Gail.

‘I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,’ sobbed Naomi.

‘Ssshh,’ soothed Jenny. ‘You have no reason to apologise to us. Although maybe your timing could have been a little better.’ She looked pointedly at Gail.

Antonia continued the patting. ‘Does John know yet?’

Naomi shook her head. ‘I haven’t had a period the whole time I’ve been breastfeeding. The only reason I took a test was because I felt really sick for days.’

‘Have you thought about what you want to do?’ asked Antonia. ‘You’ve been drinking an awful lot tonight, darling.’

‘Actually, I haven’t.’ Naomi looked at her sheepishly. ‘That’s why I’ve been offering to get the drinks. Apart from a glass of wine at the house, most of which I tipped on the garden, and a small glass with dinner, I have been on tonic water.’ She started to cry again. ‘Ruth must hate me.’

‘No, no.’ Jenny took her hand. If Ruth did hate Naomi, it would have been understandable, but hatred wasn’t Ruth’s style. ‘She’s just angry at the situation. It must be hard for her to hear that someone can get pregnant by accident when it’s been so difficult for her. To be honest, it must be difficult being around all of us, full stop.’

Jenny wanted to kick herself. Getting them all together this weekend had been a mistake. A selfish mistake. This wasn’t about a stupid blog any more. She just wanted to go home.

Gail went to the bar to get Naomi a glass of water. When she came back and Naomi seemed a little more composed, she asked if anyone wanted another drink, but no one was in the mood.

‘Shall we just head back, darlings?’ Antonia started to slip on her jacket.

‘Hang on. Maybe we should stay, just a little longer.’ Gail nodded over Jenny’s shoulder. ‘There’s a rather attractive-looking man making his way over here.’

Jenny turned in the direction of Gail’s nod and looked the attractive man straight in the eye. Oh, no!

‘Hi, Jen!’ he said.