Thirty-One

Jensen

Leaving Emery at the hospital was much harder than I’d thought possible. Her words had put my entire life in perspective. I was the one letting Vanessa continue to ruin my life. And I wouldn’t do it any longer. I wouldn’t be ruled by her dictatorship in our relationship. I didn’t care what she wanted or what she thought she could threaten me with. Colton wasn’t a game piece in an adult battle. And I refused to let her use him in such a manner.

He was a six-year-old boy. Vanessa using me and our past as weapons only hurt him. And the last thing in the whole world that I wanted was to hurt my son.

I spent the rest of the night fighting with myself to go to sleep. Even for a half hour. But it never came. When it was finally time that normal humans would be awake, I stumbled out of bed and decided to do something about it. I texted Vanessa to find out where she was staying and then drove the Mercedes over to the hotel downtown.

I parked the car out front and took the elevator to the top floor. I knocked on the door and the nanny, Jennifer, answered the door. She was a twenty-something live-in that Vanessa had hired last year full-time.

“Hey, Jensen!” Jennifer said. “Oh, Colton has been talking about you nonstop!”

“Hey Jennifer. Good to see you too.”

I stepped inside, but before I even fully entered the living room, I heard the familiar ring of, “Daddy!”

Colton launched himself from the couch in the living room and straight into my arms. I picked him up off the ground and swung him around in a circle.

“Hey, champ,” I said, squeezing him tight.

I could never get enough of this. I could never have enough hugs or enough of these moments. Him living in New York was a vise on my chest at all times. I hated it. The week I’d seen him before Christmas wasn’t long enough by far. He’d been in Paris with Vanessa for the two weeks before that, and it had been so hard to let him out of the country. Even if he had done it before, I still worried. Having him here with me always made me less nervous.

Most days, I still couldn’t believe that I had moved back to Lubbock. I’d had to admit that the two years I’d lived in New York were bad for the company. It had been a devastating decision, one I could never take lightly. But I also couldn’t take Colton out of New York. I wanted what was best for him, and even if Lubbock had good schools, I’d be stripping his known environment from him and taking him away from better schools.

On days like today, I wanted to not care.

“God, I missed you so much,” I told him as I moved him to one hip and carried him into the living room.

“I missed you, too! Are you coming home with me and Mommy and Nanny Jenn?” Colton asked. He was an adorable kid with unruly dark hair and big brown eyes that got him anything he ever wanted.

“Home?” I asked, setting him on his feet on the couch. My eyes jumped to Jennifer’s. She shrugged helplessly and the nodded her head to the bedroom as if to say leaving was Vanessa’s idea.

“Yeah, Daddy. Mommy said that we’re going back to New York today. I want you to come with us. You can meet my new art teacher when I start school again.”

I grinned down at him. Colton loved art. Vanessa had sent me pictures of the dinosaurs he had drawn after I’d taken him to the American Museum of Natural History. I wanted to take him all over the world and feed his addiction. But I definitely did not want him to leave today.

“Going to have to talk to your mom about that,” I told him.

Just then, Vanessa walked into the room. She leaned her hip against the wall to the kitchen and crossed her arms. Her eyes were guarded and wary. It was a look I was used to getting from people today. Vanessa’s was warranted after the way I’d spoken to her at the New Year’s Eve party. She’d deserved it, but I didn’t like to argue with her. It wasn’t good for Colt to see us angry even if simply being in her presence pissed me off.

“You’re leaving?” I asked. “I thought you were staying for a couple of days.”

She shrugged. “Changed my mind.”

“Hey, Daddy!” Colton said, still holding my hand. “Look at my new drawings.”

I gave Vanessa a look that said this was not over and then sat down on the couch next to Colton.

“This one is a pterodactyl,” he said, showing me a flying green dinosaur. Then, he showed me another one with horns. “This is a triceratops.”

“Wow. These are really good, champ.”

I inspected the one he was working on now. They were good for his age. It made me proud, how much he loved this. He was excelling in school, but I never wanted to suffocate my kid’s love like my father had.

“Are you going to be an artist when you grow up?”

“No, Daddy, I’m going to be just like you.”

I laughed, and then life flashed before my eyes of Colton being just like I was with my father. I shuddered at the very idea. God, I hoped I wouldn’t ruin him.

“You can be and do whatever you want.”

“I’ll fly on planes then!”

“Like a pilot?”

“No. I’ll run my business in the air.”

I chuckled again. There was no deterring him. Perhaps, it was normal for your child to want to grow up to be like you. At least at this age. I knew he’d grow up to have huge dreams, and I wanted to be there to encourage every one of them.

“You know, little man, I have someone very special that I want you to meet when you’re ready. Would you like a new friend?”

“Yeah!” Colton agreed. “I love friends. Do you think he’d color with me?”

“Jensen!” Vanessa snapped from the kitchen.

Vanessa clearly was unhappy with the idea that I was going to introduce him to anyone. And I was sure she was pissed that it was coming on the heels of meeting Emery.

“I’m sure she would color with you,” I said. “But I’m going to go talk to your mom for a minute, okay?”

“Okay, Daddy.”

I kissed him on the cheek and then left him to his drawings. Jennifer moved into to play with him while I stepped up to Vanessa.

“We need to talk.” She strode into the bedroom of the suite without another glance.

I took my time, following her inside and closing the door. I took over the space, stretching in height and crossing my arms over the bulk of my chest. She might want to have this conversation, but I wasn’t going to give her any concessions.

She whirled around on me and then took a step back. I knew that look on her face. I’d made my point. I wasn’t going to give an inch to the woman who frequently took a mile.

“You are not introducing your latest fling to Colton.”

“She’s my girlfriend, Vanessa. I can, and I will introduce her to my son.”

“Jensen, absolutely not! You don’t even know if she’s going to be in your life past tomorrow! I won’t allow you to disrupt his life like that.”

“Let’s get to the bottom of this, Vanessa. You don’t like that someone new is in my life, and you don’t want it to disrupt your delusions. This has nothing to do with Colt.”

“I don’t like that you’re going to introduce him to someone that might leave. That’s selfish.”

I ran a hand back through my hair and sighed. “You’re right, Vanessa. Under any other circumstance, it would be selfish. But it has been four years since we divorced. It’s not unreasonable for me to meet someone new in that time.”

Vanessa rolled her eyes. “She’s not someone new in your life. She’s another fling. I know you have them all the time. I know the signs.”

“Emery is different.”

“Really? How did you meet?” she asked, crossing her arms.

“At Sutton’s wedding.”

“Let me get this straight. You met her a month ago, probably banged her that night, didn’t tell her about Colton, and now think you’re ready to introduce her to him? I don’t think so.”

“What I do in my free time is none of your business. Emery is my girlfriend. You may not like that Vanessa, but that’s not about to change. Good try showing up last night and trying to break us up though.”

“I was just trying to tell her the truth. You’re the one who was a raving jackass,” Vanessa spat.

“The truth. Right,” I said sarcastically. “You were trying to break us up. Even though you were, I am sorry that I spoke to you the way that I did.” I had been harsh in the moment. Normally I never would have spoken to her that way, but after seeing Emery’s reaction, I’d lost it. “I didn’t come here to argue with you about last night. I wanted you to understand where I’m coming from.”

“Oh, I understand where you’re coming from,” she spat. “You’re thinking with your dick.”

“I can’t handle this Vanessa. I’m tired of arguing. I apologized for how I treated you, but you can’t dictate who Colton meets. Emery is in my life, and Colton is my life.”

I turned and opened the door to go back out to see my son. I knew that I needed to talk to Emery about again. I wanted to make things right and get us on the same page.

“I’ll tell Marc,” Vanessa spat.

I shook my head. I’d heard that one before. “Empty threats, Vanessa.”

“They’re not empty threats,” she spat. “I will tell him.

“I don’t believe you. If you think meeting Emery isn’t in his best interest, then I have no idea how you could think Marc would be either.”

Then I strode away from her. After kissing Colton good-bye and promising to come back later, I left the hotel and went to go see Emery. We had some catching up to do.