Chapter Twenty

Carson

It was being hailed as the Blizzard Battle of the Midwest. The Cannons were hosting the Ospreys and it was going to get ugly. The snow fell relentlessly for days on end and even before we took the field, I felt like my bones were frozen from the inside out. It was going to be the hardest game of my life, but also the most important. If we won this game, we’d be flying out to LA to play in the Super Bowl in two weeks and my whole life would change.

Not that it hadn’t already.

“You ready to kick some ass, Stiles?” Langston asked, sidling up to me in the tunnel.

I grit my teeth and forced a nod.

We took the field to a deafening roar from the fans, and I took a moment to marvel at the fact that every seat had an ass in it, even though most of the seats were open and exposed to the frickin’ blizzard. True Cannons fans. I’d arranged for Gwen to be in the club level with the other wives and girlfriends. She wasn’t in a luxury box by any means but at least had an overhang to protect her from the snow and wind a bit. Cassie would be there with Kenzie, so I knew she wouldn’t be alone. I raised a hand to wave to the crowd, silently thanking them for putting their faith in my untested hands. They’d embraced me as the leader of our team, and I knew that no matter how many playoff games I’d play during my career, I’d never be able to top the love and support from the Cannons fans in this final push.

“Coin toss, Stiles, move your ass.”

I hustled to catch up to Rose and made it to center field where the refs were waiting to get the game started.

The weather was more than a major factor in the game. At times, visibility was damn near zero and made it impossible to even make a handoff. I gave up any thoughts of a real passing game and it was all about ball control. The only positive effect of the snowy weather was it kept my head in the game.

When the final whistle blew, I stood on the field, stunned into silence as I stared up at the scoreboard. It was like I’d been captured inside a snow globe come to life. Everything around me was frozen and icy but I was immune to it, a statue in the blowing snow. I couldn’t even see the score—and could barely hear it over the crowd!

Cannons WIN! Super Bowl bound! LA here we come!

I shook my head and started to laugh. A low rumble that bubbled up until I was howling and hollering with the rest of my teammates. “We fuckin’ did it! We did it!”

****

When Coach Wheels finally got us all corralled into the locker room, he gave us his final speech and though we all were still humming with excitement, a wave of emotion swept through the room and more than a few guys were caught swiping a mysterious something from their eyes. My own throat was clogged with a mixture of feelings that would likely take a few days to swallow. There were so many milestones to celebrate and many more still to come. I was proud of the way I’d played for my team, and I knew my future was forever changed thanks to the unexpected opportunity.

“Take the day off tomorrow,” Coach said, standing in the center of the circle of all of us players. “Don’t do anything stupid. I don’t want late night calls that one of you lost their damned mind and landed themselves in trouble.” Everyone laughed as his eyes lingered on a few of the notorious wild cats of the group.

Langston was beside me and laughed. “Damn, I really must be losing my touch. Normally that warning would explicitly mention my name, Coach.”

We all laughed and I slung an arm over my new friend’s shoulders. “Secret’s out, Rose. We all know you’re just a big pussy-whipped cream puff these days.”

He flashed a wide grin. “Damn it.”

Coach clapped his hands. “This is for you, gents. Each and every one of you left your guts out on that field today. So take the day off and spend it with your family, you’ve earned it. But Tuesday morning, I expect every single one of you here bright and early and we’re gonna double down until we’re all boarding that plane to LA. Ya feel me?”

We all nodded and added our agreement and then scattered, everyone eager to go off to whatever postgame activities they’d lined up. For me, there was only thing I wanted to do, and it involved Gwen and my bed.

Langston clapped me on the shoulder. “Should we go get our ladies?”

“Damn straight.”

He led the way and we went out into the hallway. Cassie was there, and started bouncing in place as soon as she locked her eyes onto Langston. She rushed forward and he picked her up, effortlessly spinning her around. “I’m so proud of you, babe!”

I peeked around the corner and then doubled back to where Langston and Cassie were making out—much to Kenzie’s chagrin. The small girl looked up at me, a grim look on her delicate face. “Can you make them stop?” she asked.

I laughed and patted her slight shoulder. “Sadly, I don’t think so. Hey, do you know where Gwen is?”

Kenzie shook her head. “I don’t think she was here.”

My eyebrows knit together and I slapped Langston on the shoulder. He removed himself from Cassie and shot me a glare. “Damn, dude. Kinda busy here.”

Kenzie swooped in and took the opportunity to grab Cassie’s hand. “He’s looking for Gwen.”

Cassie looked up at me and shook her head. “She wasn’t with us. Did she sit down in another section?”

Panic fluttered through my chest. Where was she? Had something happened? The roads were beyond treacherous even with the snow plows running around the clock. Had I been playing the best game of my life while my girlfriend—the woman I was falling in love with each and every day—was lying in a tangled mess of metal and glass?

With shaking hands, I fumbled through my coat pockets until I found my cell. There were two missed calls from Gwen. My stomach sank even lower. Was she trapped? I’d never forgive myself if she was hurt. I should have thought to send a car to get her and bring her to the game. Damn it, why hadn’t I thought about that? I shouldn’t have asked her to drive in this nasty snow storm.

I held up a finger to Cassie and Langston who were both wearing confused expressions. I listened to the phone ring, panic swelling higher with each long pause. Finally, I heard her pick up and heaved a sigh of relief. “Gwen, where are you? Are you all right?”

“I’m at home,” she said, her tone almost like it was a question.

“Home?”

Langston and Cassie exchanged a look and then reached for Kenzie’s hands. “See you later,” Cassie mouthed to me as they turned away to head for the nearest exit.

I offered a weak wave before they were lost in the crowd of other players and their families. “I thought you would be here, at the game, we just finished. Uh—we won. We’re going to the Super Bowl.”

“I know. I saw the fourth quarter on TV. You did great. Congratulations.”

I dragged a hand over the back of my neck. Something was wrong. I felt like I’d just taken a wrong turn, landed in a bad neighborhood, and had the ill sense to seek directions in a rough and tumble biker bar. “Is everything okay? Are you sick? I saw you tried to call before the game, but I was—”

“I’m fine, Carson. I was calling to let you know I was going to miss the game.” Her tone was still too frosty. It set my nerves on edge. She sighed. “I’m sorry. I wanted to be there, to cheer you on, but something came up with Vinnie’s case and I didn’t have a choice.”

“What happened?” I asked, trying to keep my own voice under control and not let the irritation seep through.

“I had a meeting scheduled with this attorney who my new boss thought could help me with the case. It was supposed to be a cup of coffee tomorrow afternoon, a chance for me to pick his brain, but he called me last night and asked if we could move it to today. I had to go.”

The hairs on the back of my neck stood up. She’d been working, with another guy, on a Sunday, instead of being at the biggest game of the season? I knew I had no right to get territorial and jealous but it felt like hot coals had been dropped into the pit of my stomach all the same. I forced myself to draw in a deep breath. “All right. Well, I’m uh—I’m sorry you missed it. You want me to come pick you up and we can go get something—well, nevermind, I’m assuming you already ate?”

“Carson, I said I was sorry I missed the game. You don’t have to be that way.”

“Be what way, Gwen? Disappointed? Upset?” I shook my head and scanned the room. Everyone was celebrating with their families. No one was so much as glancing my way. “Well, like it or not, I am. This was a huge night for me and when it was all over and done with, I wanted to see your face, to kiss you and spend the night with you. But instead, I’m here, watching everyone else…”

“Carson, I’m—”

“No,” I snapped, interrupting her. “It’s fine. You have your big case and I’ve had a long night, too. I don’t want to argue with you.”

“I don’t want to argue either, but, Carson, you can’t expect me to be there for every game or be able to drop everything and be the big football fan! I have a life too!”

“Right.” Anger swelled to the surface and I swallowed hard, pressing it back. I wasn’t going to allow myself to break. It wasn’t worth it. She wasn’t worth it.

Fuck. Yes, she was. And I knew it. She’d gotten closer to me than anyone had before and now that I’d let her in—she was trying to find her way out. Just like everyone else. I was a temporary, fleeting thing. Her fling. Her distraction until her real life started.

I squeezed my eyes shut and pinched at the bridge of my nose. “I’ll call you later. Have a good night, Gwen.”

I clicked off before she could object, pocketed the phone, and made a quick exit, not stopping to smile at anyone or make small talk. I hit the exit and started running.