I woke up at five, the old battery-operated watch on my wrist beeping faintly. If I weren’t such a light sleeper, I probably would have slept right through it.

With my body sore from sleeping in a weird position all night, I got up, hearing my bones crack with my every movement. I didn’t know how these people managed to live their whole life like this. I had been here no more than six months, and I felt like I had aged five years in that short amount of time.

Quickly, I tossed on some clothes. I opted for a long-sleeve shirt, despite the heat, knowing that jungle mosquitos were notoriously aggressive, even in the daylight. I shook my can of bug spray, but of course, it was empty. It had been empty ever since the first month of my stay. Why I hadn’t thrown it out by now was beyond me.

With my bag on my shoulders, I was about to slip out when Chau suddenly appeared in front of me, blocking my way.

She asked me where I was going, a disapproving look on her face.

I tried to explain to her that I needed to work today, but she didn’t look convinced. It probably didn’t help that I had mixed up some of my words.

Eventually, however, the crunch of footsteps caused her to turn around.

Kirk was standing there in his full gear, looking inexplicably handsome. I couldn’t quite understand how baggy cargo shorts and an army-print vest could make a man sexy, but somehow, it did. I felt my heart kick-start in my chest just looking at him. It was almost as if we were in a movie. He was the handsome hero played by Brad Pitt, and I was the helpless female victim he was supposed to save.

Only, I wasn’t going to fall for him again.

“Do you need a minute?” he asked, noticing the look on Chau’s face.

“No.” I waved to her as I followed Kirk.

“Are you really planning to travel the jungle in jeans?” he asked the second we were alone. His eyes traveled down my body like he was drinking in every curve.

“My face is up here,” I said, tilting his chin upward.

“Sorry,” he mumbled with a pout.

“Just because I’m going on this crazy mission with you doesn’t mean I’ve forgiven you for what you did. Just remember that,” I said, moving a few feet ahead so that I wouldn’t have to be so close to him.

“I’ve already apologized. What more do you want me to do?”

“Shut up and walk,” I said, my voice a little crueler than I’d intended it to be.

“Fine. But, you promised to talk about this, and I plan to hold you to that promise.” Without another word, he pulled ahead, stepping into the tree line.

I followed closely behind him, paying attention to my surroundings so I wouldn’t trip and accidentally break an ankle. If I hadn’t been worrying so much about my footing, I probably would have noticed how incredibly beautiful the jungle was. Verdant foliage. Bright, blooming flowers. Colorful birds flying from tree branch to tree branch.

“How are you holding up?” Kirk asked, looking at me over his shoulder.

“I’m fine. Do you know how much farther we have to go?”

“Trang said to follow the path to the river, but she didn’t specify how long it would take to get there.”

“She’s trying to lure you into a trap.”

“Then why did you want to tag along if you knew the whole thing would just blow up in my face?”

“Someone had to save you from yourself.”

He suddenly stopped, and before I knew what was going on, he had pinned me to a nearby tree. “Admit it, Sidney, you still care for me the same way I care for you.”

“Of course I do, you idiot. I never stopped caring. If I had, I would’ve probably found someone else by now, but instead, here I am on this suicide mission with you.” The words spewed out of my lips. “You’ve been on my mind constantly since the day you disappeared. I blamed myself for months, trying to justify what you did. A part of me never lost hope that you’d come back, but eventually, all of that was replaced by despair and anger..”

“Then why didn’t you write to me? For months, I waited for you to write back. Even if it was a letter telling me how much you hated me. I needed something, but it was like you had never received it.”

I was quiet for a moment. “I did receive it. I must’ve read it a thousand times - a million even.”

“So, why didn’t you say something?”

“I couldn’t. I just couldn’t accept the fact that you had left without saying goodbye, just because you were too scared to talk to me about your decision to join the Navy. I thought we had the kind of relationship where we could tell each other anything…” I looked away. “I’m sorry I never wrote to you, but it was just too painful…”

Despite my best efforts to keep them away, tears started to stream down my cheeks. I had spent so long trying to convince myself that Kirk was an asshole for leaving that I had forgotten all of the reasons why I had loved him so much.

As I looked up into his eyes, it all came crashing back to me. His compassion. The way he always made me feel safe. His humor. That heart-warming smile of his. How he always remembered the little things. How he could always cheer me up.

Once I shucked away all of the pent-up negative emotions that had built up over the years, I felt a thousand times better. And even more so when I finally gathered the courage to lean forward and kiss him.