FOURTEEN
AFTER THE FINAL day of their ravraxia ceremony, Cara and Devix returned to the Golden City. She hadn’t wanted to leave, if she was being honest with herself. Out there, on the plains of the Ravrax’tor, it had felt like just the two of them again, just like at their home in southern Rozun. Cara hadn’t realized how much she missed just being with her mate.
And the blood bond had brought them closer than ever, something that she hadn’t thought was even possible.
But when the twin suns rose after their third day, Devix had told her they needed to return, even though the mating call had not quite worn off. The strange lingering energy still pulsed within them, but it was much more manageable than it had been.
On their flight back to the Golden City, however, Devix put the hovercraft on auto-pilot and they’d mated right on the floor, hovering in mid-air as the wind rushed around them. It had been exhilarating, yet frightening, but they’d laughed about it afterwards, once the high wore off.
When the city came into view, Cara was in the circle of her mate’s arms, clutching one of the fur blankets from their tent against her body—Devix had torn her dress off her after all. She sighed when she saw it, thinking that their ‘honeymoon’ was over.
“We’re back,” she whispered, even as the wind whipped away her words.
Devix still heard it however. He stroked a soothing hand down her arm before reaching around to cradle her growing belly. Even since they’d landed on Luxiria, about six days ago, Cara had noticed the dramatic change in her body. Privanax, that jerk of a doctor, had been right when he’d told her the growth of the baby would be quick, almost three times as fast as it would’ve been with a human child.
In reply to her words, Devix murmured, “I have to be at the command center when we return. Will you stay with Sessela?”
Cara frowned. “Why do you have to go?”
There was something else that had been bothering her during their ravraxia. Through their bond—something Devix called the fellixix—she felt that he was keeping something from her, worrying over something. He’d told her he was just worried about the child, about her health, and Cara had accepted that that was part of it. But there was something else, something he wasn’t telling her.
And it put her on edge.
Devix could feel that it put her on edge too, through their bond. It was a vicious cycle, something that they’d never needed to contend with in their relationship before. But they needed to learn how to navigate it quickly, or else Cara was worried that they’d become even more secretive with one another.
She didn’t want that. They’d always been honest with each other. Even when Devix had first encountered her, he’d been honest about his intentions, about the role he’d played when Sarkon had employed him.
Devix took his time answering her, but finally said, “I am training with Rixavox.”
Through their bond, Cara felt it was the truth. But she still couldn’t help but ask, “Why? Do you feel like you’ll need the training?”
“I am not as strong or as quick as I once was,” he admitted to her, which was hard for Cara to believe. She’d seen him training. He trained almost every day back on Rozun to keep his skill level up. “Luxirian warriors are more intense about their regiments. I am learning more.”
Again, he kept something from her. But Cara knew it wasn’t the right time to push him about it. They hadn’t even made it back to the Golden City yet and, perhaps a little selfishly, she didn’t want to ruin the good mood they were both in, coming off three days of amazing sex and bonding.
But eventually, she knew they would need to confront this.
“Will you?” he asked again.
“Will I what?”
“Go to Sessela while we are at the command center?”
Cara relaxed a little. None of the Luxirians seemed able to pronounce Cecelia’s name right, but she thought it was charming.
“Yes, I will.”
* * *
“So…” Cecelia started, her tone a little too casual.
Cara took another bite of a delicious berry-like fruit. It was tart, but sweet. Refreshing. Already, she couldn’t help but think that it would make a delicious glaze over the pillerva pod custard dessert she’d made back on Rozun, especially if she added in a drop or two of bunreb oil to add a spicy, cinamon-like flavor.
“Yes?” Cara urged, biting back a smile.
“How was it?” Cecelia asked, wriggling her eyebrows. There was no doubt in Cara’s mind that she was asking about the ravraxia.
She chuckled. “As you well know, it was pretty damn amazing.”
“Right?” Cecelia asked, sighing. “How were the plains of the Ravrax’tor?”
Cara cocked her head. “You two didn’t have your ceremony there?”
“No,” the other woman replied. “No, our ravraxia was…well, we had it near Velraxa. That’s the outpost that Rixavox runs, over a half-day journey from here. There is this sacred pool called the Rillirax, deep inside one of the mountains.” Cecelia sighed again, a smile appearing on her lips, and it didn’t take a genius to figure out what she was thinking. “That’s where we had ours. It was…pretty damn amazing,” she answered, repeating Cara’s words.
Cara grinned. All she could think was that Luxirian males really seemed to know their shit when it came to sex and pleasure. Their ridged cocks certainly helped.
“The plains were really fascinating,” Cara replied. “There were these statues of the Fates…I—I felt them. Inside me. It was so…so…”
Still she couldn’t find the words to describe it.
“The Seeing,” Cecelia guessed, nodding. The brunette shifted her position on the cushions where they were sitting in the fire pit. The suns had already set, but Devix and Rixavox still hadn’t returned from the command center.
“Yeah. It was unnerving, but also natural. Back on Earth, I’d never been very religious or spiritual, but here…it’s hard to deny that something greater is at work.”
“Do you feel them on Rozun?” Cecelia questioned, tilting her head to the side. Her hands stroked over her rounded belly. During their discussion earlier, Cecelia said she was only two months pregnant, a little over a month ahead of Cara. She looked more like she was five months pregnant.
“On Rozun? No,” Cara replied, shaking her head. “Devix said he only feels them here. He had thought that maybe…they’d abandoned him after his exile.”
Cecelia’s eyes softened, her lips turning to a small frown. There was a brief moment of silence, but Cara found that it wasn’t uncomfortable. Finally, Cecelia asked, “Are you guys planning to stay? On Luxiria?”
“Stay?” Cara questioned, her brows furrowing. “No. I don’t see how we could anyways, with his exile still in place. Besides, even if we could, something tells me we wouldn’t be very welcome.”
“You could live in Velraxa.” Cecelia suggested. “I’m serious. It’s colder there, but it’s home for us. It’s much different than the Golden City. You should think about it, if you decide to stay.”
“And what do you do there?” Cara couldn’t help but ask. All Cara had done while they’d been there was sit around during the day and wait for Devix to return from the command center. It made her restless. “I feel like I would lose my mind if I can’t be productive, you know?”
“I know,” Cecelia sighed. “In Velraxa, I work as a healer’s apprentice, a healer named Kirzalla. She’s an old, cranky bat, but she seems to like me in her own way and she teaches me a lot. It makes me happy and it keeps me busy. But here, in the Golden City…well, Rixavox has a lot of his duties to attend to whenever we’re here. I don’t mind though. Sometimes, I need all the rest, especially now,” she murmured, touching her stomach again with a small smile. “Not gonna lie though, I do wish they had Netflix here.”
Cara laughed, feeling a friendly affection bubble up in her chest.
“Cecelia,” Cara started, reaching forward to take her hand, “I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate everything…you spending time with me when Devix has been gone, answering all my questions so patiently, making me feel welcome. You’ve been so wonderful during all this.”
Cecelia’s eyes began to water but then she smiled and murmured, “Damn hormones.” They both laughed, but were interrupted by a trilling sound coming from a silver pad imbedded into the wall of their dwelling. “Oh, that’s probably Rixavox. Hold on.”
Cara watched as her friend got up and answered the video call. To her surprise, Rixavox spoke to Cecelia in Luxirian, and the human female seemed to understand every word perfectly, nodding to whatever he said, before ending the call.
“You understood that?” Cara asked in surprise.
“Oh, yes,” Cecelia replied once she returned to her seat in the fire pit. “It was an after effect of our blood bond. I basically got a free language implant.”
“Damn.” That definitely would’ve come in handy.
Cecelia laughed. “It might happen eventually. Sometimes it takes time. Anyways, Rixavox said they were just leaving the command center and that they’ll be here shortly.”
“That’s sweet he calls you,” Cara teased.
“That male worries too much now that my stomach is bigger. Devix will get the same way, if he isn’t there already. With Luxirians…it’s like the moment you start showing for real…everything changes.” Cecelia rolled her eyes but Cara could secretly tell that the brunette loved her mate’s attentiveness. “I wonder how beat up they’ll both be.”
Cara straightened. “Beat up?”
“Well, from training. Luxirians train pretty intensely. Even though they’re amazingly skilled fighters, they always come out a little worse for wear,” Cecelia said, looking at her. Then, it looked like something else came to the female’s mind because she nibbled on her lip for a bit, before asking, “I’ve been meaning to ask…how are you holding up? About the warrior trial? Are you nervous for him?”
“For who?” Cara asked slowly, though the moment the questions fell from Cecelia’s lips, dread began to fill her stomach.
Cecelia’s brows furrowed. “For Devix, of course. Rixavox told me about it.”
Cara stared at the brunette and a strange sensation settled over her, like an out-of-body experience. Her breathing went shallow and she just knew that this was what Devix had tried to keep from her, what he hadn’t wanted her to know.
A warrior trial.
“Oh my God,” Cecelia whispered, watching her carefully. “He didn’t tell you. Oh my God…Cara, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have—”
“Tell me,” Cara said, her voice steady even though everything in her twisted and turned at the worried expression on Cecelia’s face. “Please.”
Cecelia hesitated for only a moment, her brows furrowed in sympathy…or perhaps pity, Cara couldn’t tell. “Rixavox told me that the male who accused Devix of…of…”
“Pidixa,” Cara provided for her, the name of that scum falling easily from her lips, though her mind felt numb.
“Yes, Pidixa,” Cecelia said quietly. “Rixavox said he came to the command center before you left for your ravraxia. That he’d challenged Devix to a warrior trial. It’s a…it’s a fight.”
Cara heard what went unspoken. “A fight where the loser doesn’t live, you mean?”
“Cara,” Cecelia whispered, grappling out to reach her hand, “I’m sorry. I thought he told you. I never meant—”
“That’s why he’s training,” Cara said, blinking, trying to make sense of the last few moments but failing. “That’s what he wouldn’t tell me. I knew something was wrong.”
Just then, she heard movement outside the dwelling, heard the humming of a hovercraft as it landed on the terrace and the deep, urgent voices of Rixavox and Devix conversing in Luxirian.
Cara still felt numb when Devix burst into the dwelling, his eyes immediately landing on her. No doubt he’d felt something was wrong through their blood bond. His expression went grim when he saw her face.
“Luxiva,” he murmured.
Cara stood from the fire pit, looking at him. He was beat up. As was Rixavox when he came to stand next to his brother. There were cuts along their bared chests and arms, from blades or claws, she couldn’t tell. It made her sick to her stomach, seeing her mate like that, knowing why.
Looking back at Cecelia, Cara murmured, “I’ll see you tomorrow.” Then she hesitated before saying, “Thank you.”
Cecelia only nodded, her gaze flickering from Cara to Devix. Without saying another word, Cara walked towards Devix but then brushed past him to step outside onto the terrace. The cool, night air felt good as it ran over her cheeks and she inhaled deeply, feeling like her lungs were constricting.
“Cara,” Devix murmured, coming up behind her.
She didn’t want to have this discussion in ear-shot of Cecelia and Rixavox—it was bad enough that she’d had to hear about the trial from her—so she turned to their temporary house and walked there in silence, still reeling. Behind her, she heard Devix follow.
It was only when they were alone, only after Devix shut and barred the door of the dwelling that she turned to him. His lips were pressed tight, his muscles bunched, and his eyes were completely focused on her.
“You lied to me.”
Devix jolted and he approached her, only stopping when she held out a hand to push his chest away. She didn’t want him touching her. His touch made everything confusing and she needed to be clear-headed.
“Luxiva, please,” he said softly, his voice darkening.
“When were you going to tell me about this warrior trial?” she asked, her brows furrowing. “The morning of, so that I wouldn’t have a choice but to accept it?”
“Cara, I wanted to tell you,” he murmured, stepping closer. “I was planning to tell you this night.”
“I don’t know if I believe that,” she whispered, her eyes stinging with tears. She crossed her arms over her chest, feeling so, so vulnerable and scared. “I’m not even angry. I’m just hurt. So hurt that you would keep something like this from me. And scared.”
Cara saw the physical reaction he had to her words. She knew that it ate him up inside, knowing that his mate was hurt by his actions. He clenched his horns, his feet pacing around the central hub.
“We’ve always been honest with each other. About everything!” Cara cried. “Why would you keep this from me? Why?”
“I did not know how to tell you,” he admitted finally, his chest rumbling. “You had already expressed that you did not want to come here, but we needed to. For the offspring. I knew you would want to leave if you learned about the trial.”
“You’re damned straight,” she breathed.
“Luxiva, we must stay.”
“What is it?” she asked, feeling that spark of anger begin to burn inside her. “Tell me what a warrior trial is.”
“A Luxirian warrior has the right to challenge an opponent that he felt has wronged him or his family unit in some way. It is a fight to the death. Pidixa challenged me.”
“When?”
“The span after we arrived,” he said.
“No, when is the trial?”
Devix blew out a breath, watching her. His eyes were dilated. Not long ago, they were dilated for a different reason entirely during their ravraxia. And already, that time felt so long ago.
“In three spans.”
“Three,” she whispered, her knees shaking. With an unsteady legs, she sat down on the cushions of the fire pit, running a hand through her hair.
Devix immediately knelt before her until they were eye-level. He cupped her face, forcing her to look at him. She didn’t want to see him, but she had no choice.
“Luxiva, please understand.”
“I don’t understand anything about this, about why you still want to stay when your life is threatened, when we are threatened. We need to leave, Devix.”
“I cannot,” he said. “The challenge has already been issued. Disobeying it would mean my death.”
A laugh tumbled from Cara’s lips but it was ugly and bitter. “Of course, it would. Everything means your death here.”
“There is no doubt in my mind that I will be the victor, luxiva,” he said, his eyes roaming her face. Through their blood bond, she felt his unease, felt his desperation that she understand, and his worry that he’d hurt her too much.
“You can’t promise that,” she exclaimed, trying to shake off his hold. She needed space, needed time alone to process what was happening.
“I can,” he murmured, keeping his hold on her, not allowing her to escape. “I will allow no one to take me from you. I am stronger because of you, because of our blood bond.”
“Is that why you wanted to do the ravraxia?” she asked, a terrible thought forming. “To make you stronger for the fight?”
He physically recoiled. “Nix, luxiva! That had nothing to do with the trial!”
Cara shook her head and finally shook off his hold, pushing him away. She stood on shaking legs, on the verge of a complete breakdown, and he looked up at her, still stunned from her accusation.
“Have you ever thought what would happen if you did die? How I would feel, what I would do if you were gone, how I would raise our child alone?”
Devix swallowed. “Rixavox has vowed to protect you and our offspring. You would be safe here.”
It was like a blade to her chest, hearing him say that. “Y-you talked to him about it, so you know there’s a possibility you might fall in the fight. So really, you can’t p-promise me anything.”
Tears swam in her vision and her throat burned, a sob escaping.
“W-we should have never come here,” she whispered.
“Cara…” Devix said, his tone anguished, reaching for her again.
“No,” she said, strengthening her voice, pushing his hands away. “No. I-I need time to think about this, about what it means. I…I’m going to bed,” she said, meeting his eyes, needing to be alone. For once, she just wanted to be alone.
“Luxiva.”
“You should sleep out here,” she finished. “I need…I need you to sleep out here tonight.”
And then, before he could say another word, she turned on her heel and walked towards the back bedroom. She didn’t bother washing up or changing her clothes, she simply crawled into bed, under the furs, and began to cry.
Just that morning, she’d woken up in Devix’s arms, on the plains of the Ravrax’tor, in the ring of the Fates. Protected, warm, happy. She’d been so happy, just that morning.
And now…now it felt like her heart was being torn from her chest.