Chapter Eleven

“What’s wrong?”

Saffron looked up at him and smiled. It had been two days since they had made love in the tub. It felt like she had grown apart from him instead of together, and she knew it was her fault.

She stood and moved to the window. They were in the living room; he had asked her if she wanted to watch television, but the secret she was keeping was eating at her soul.

“I have something I need to tell you. I know it was wrong of me to keep it a secret.”

Normally, she kept everything secret but hiding things from Xander made her uncomfortable. She knew it was because every day she cared about him a little more, but telling him could mean losing him.

“Tell me, Saffron.” He was sitting on a chair looking totally composed.

Saffron, not wild cat. She flinched because she had brought that one on herself.

“I remember everything.” It had come back to her flooding her mind when they left her apartment. She hadn’t told him because she didn’t want to lose him.

“I know.”

“What?”

“I know you well enough to know when you’re overcome with something. I didn’t press you because I knew you would tell me when you made peace with yourself.”

Wasn’t he the smart one? That’s exactly what she had been doing. Making peace with all the bad decisions she’d made over the past two years. That’s when she felt like she stepped onto this crazy train.

“I know where to find Richard. We should go end this.”

He still sat not moving a muscle.

“I’m sorry.” Her voice was low. Was this how it felt to disappoint someone you cared about?

“Don’t be sorry.” He said each word slowly making sure she heard them all. He stood and walked over to the window wrapping her up in his arms. His front was squeezed against her back making her feel warm and secure.

“Everything takes time wild cat, including trust. What did you fear?”

“That we would find Richard, and then you would no longer want me around or need me around.”

“That brings us back to the conversation you have been avoiding.”

He turned her around kissing her before leading her back to the couch to have a seat.

She swallowed hard. It was still too soon for this conversation.

“I—.”

He put his finger to her lips and shook his head. She stayed silent and waited.

“Where I come from there are no mates for males or females created the way I was. We have no future except to fight and eventually die. Not too long before we found ourselves stranded on Earth, I was in a battle. Caden and I were always a team. We know each other’s thoughts without trying. We can see out of each other’s eyes. Right now, he’s making lunch and worrying about whether I have eaten.” He started laughing, his green eyes glittering with amusement.

“Caden says to tell you he couldn't care less if I have eaten. He is not a mother hen.”

She smiled because of the love they had for each other. His smile disappeared, and she felt her stomach tighten.

“We were on a mission to take down two separate teams with fire bombs. We had done it thousands of time. It was routine. This time there was a third team we didn’t know about. That’s where my scars came from.”

Right, the scars. She never really noticed them. She was too busy looking at him and how beautiful he was. The scars added not detracted from his rough masculine look.

“I was cut off, maybe I died. I had no idea why I was brought back from death until the day I met you. Then everything fell into place like one of your puzzles, and I knew I survived to meet you. You’re what I was told I could never have. My rage has been growing, and I wondered if I would have to be put down. What would happen to Caden? You focused the anger. My werewolf is all about keeping you safe. I’ve had hundreds of years to process what I was feeling and to be prepared to accept you when you arrived. You’ve had days.”

He was right. This was all new to her since she never really thought of having a husband or a mate. She wasn’t one of those girls who planned their wedding or looked through bridal magazines. Maybe it was because her dad raised her. She wasn’t sure it just wasn’t ever on her horizon.

“Tell me about what it means to become mated.” Her hand was over her heart, and she was trying to be casual about it. He had told her that she brought the stability he needed back into his life, and her heart was racing a mile a minute to know that someone could need her like that. What scared her was that she seemed to need him to. The wildness she had pushed down years ago was beginning to rear its head, but around him, she had control.

“For me, mating is a forever bond. There is no divorce for the Kur’ik.”

“What if you no longer want me?”

“I’ll always want you. I realize forever is a long time. Whatever happens, the two of us will work it out.”

She nodded. That was a promise she wanted to believe, but even now she thought of her parents who parted when she was a young child. Her dad never said he divorced her mom. He simply told her that it was necessary for them to go their separate ways. She ached to hear her mom’s voice or to see a picture of her.

“That’s what we say Xander, but so many people give up. On the other hand, they may be in a relationship where they are being abused. Divorce happens; I think at times it’s inevitable.”

“Then why do so many of your people stay together?”

That was a good question. She heard older couples say that love is a determination to grow together, to show your partner respect, to honor their wishes and goals. Still, she hadn’t seen that displayed in her life. Did that mean she had to be a casualty?

“What if I’m not sure yet? I know I care about you. Maybe I could grow to love you. I don’t think I understand what love is.”

“One day at a time.”

She smiled. It was what she said every morning she woke up, but she didn’t realize he heard her. She was taking their relationship one day at a time. Yeah, she was scared especially since she knew her past but not enough to run from the only good male she had found.

“Anything else I should know?”

“When we mate, I will have to bite your shoulder.”

“Like what you did earlier?”

He remembered the tub and the taste of her blood on his tongue and felt himself growing harder.

“No, I will have to sink my teeth into your shoulder and share my enzymes with you.” He opened his mouth, and his fangs grew longer.

“What big teeth you have grandpa.”

“The better to eat you with.”

Her mouth opened wide, and she laughed. Her arm went around her waist, and her hand wiped at her eyes. She was laughing so hard that tears were coming. When she was done, she climbed up on his lap. The lingering fear she felt in the back of her mind fled. There was no telling what would happen, but she was his.

“What next?”

“Caden wants to know if we want to come over for lunch?”

She could hear the longing in his voice, not for food. He missed his brother.

“I’d like that. Maybe we could see your house, and I could even stay there with you.”

“I put all your things into our den.”

She smiled. It was time to make another move in their relationship, and she liked the direction this was going.

“I’m ready.” She stood up. “Should we bring something? Wine, beer, soda?”

“Just ourselves.”

She went to where her shoes were located and slid into the sandals since they weren’t leaving the barrier.

“What about Richard? Shouldn’t we be going after him?”

“Tomorrow. I’m sure he packed up the minute the male I sent back to him got there.”

“That’s thing one. It’s a name I made up for him.”

“Well when thing one crawled his way back into Richards office, he cut bait and ran.”

“That makes sense. When do I get to meet the others around here?”

“Tonight, we’ll go to The Wolves Den. It’s a club.” She took his hand.

They walked over to his house. There were several people out who waved at them and called out greetings.

“I love the way you all talk to each other.”

“We’ve been together a long time.”

“It’s nice. I didn’t know my neighbors, and they didn’t know me.”

They came to his house, and she stopped to admire his porch. She lived in a house growing up with her dad, but they didn’t have a front porch.

“I love your porch. I can see sitting out here at night with a glass of lemonade looking at the sky.”

He stopped to look at the porch. They had a few pieces of furniture that they had borrowed, but it didn’t shine the way the backyard did.

“What would you like on your perfect porch?” He took her hand and walked up the stairs.

“A porch swing. Does that sound silly? I would always see one in the old movies, and I could picture myself sitting there with my boyfriend or my mate sitting next to me.”

“It sounds terrific, to be honest. I’m still amazed that we can do different things for ourselves big and small. Before I could live with Caden in a room, and that was it.”

They walked back to the kitchen. There was a young male smiling at her before he opened the oven.

“Saffron, that’s Ven and you know the others.”

“Hi Ven, hi everyone.”

“Hi, Saffron.” They smiled and waved.

“What are we having for lunch?”

“The guys are having steaks. Ven brought us over lasagna. He just learned to make it, so he’s treating different ones to a taste of it.” Sage told her.

“That sounds good. Thanks, Ven.” He turned around and looked at her.

“I don’t want to sound weird, and you probably hear this all the time, but your eyes are fantastic.” There was something about his blue eyes that almost mesmerized her.

“Thank you. I’m glad to finally meet you, Saffron. I wanted to make sure to be here so I could witness what would happen.”

She frowned, that didn’t make any sense.

“We just decided to come.”

“I’m a lot like my mom. Not my biological one, my real one.”

She wanted to classify him as anything but rational, but there was a look in his eyes that said he knew exactly what he was talking about. He was eerie but not in a way that made her worry, but if she had been the enemy, she would run long and hard.

Caden placed plates with large steaks on them in front of Xander, and then one on his plate as well as Ven’s. Sage crossed her arms, and he reluctantly went back to the stove and brought over a vegetable medley. Saffron had to cover her mouth at the look in their eyes when they saw their steaks touching the vegetables.

“I’m sure it will be good,” she whispered to Xander.

“I think you should have some with your lasagna.” She grinned at him and took a bite.

“Oh, this is good. I think you’d make a great chef.”

“He’s not interested,” Sage told her reaching for bread at the same time she did.

Their fingers touched, and arcs of electricity went between the two of them.

“Caden your steak is great,” Ven said breaking the astonishment in the room.