Chapter Ten
He’d actually done it.
Chris had shown up on her doorstep like he’d promised, both when he’d left and when he’d called a few days ago while she was working. While she was waiting on Zach’s table, to be exact.
Damn him.
“Chris,” she said, holding the door open and blocking the doorway. Half convinced it was going to be Zach paying an unexpected visit with a lame excuse like he needed some sugar, but really wanted to flirt, she’d flung the door open with far too much enthusiasm.
Zach had been on her mind each and every day. More specifically, his mouth had been on her mind. After he’d issued that challenge about kissing her, it was all she could do to keep her wits about her. And her vibrator in its drawer.
Yeah, she’d failed at that one.
“What are you doing here?” She kept her body in the doorway.
A frown marred Chris’s otherwise perfect face. He was handsome, she had to give him that. But in a refined, snobbish, moneyed kind of way. Not like Zach, who was…well, Zach was straight up hot. Rugged. Muscled. A little dangerous. The kind of man who would know exactly what to do with a woman. Whether that was to throw her down on the bed, or slam her against the wall…
And she was fantasizing about Zach again. Why?
Whatever the reason, her body reacted to her wayward thoughts and she had to resist the urge to stick her head in the freezer.
“I told you I was coming. Remember? I told you we had some space and it was time to discuss our relationship and future. Hit the reset button. Any of this ringing a bell?” Chris stepped closer, as though he expected her to move back and let him into the house.
She didn’t. He wasn’t welcome.
“And I told you, as I told you before you left here, that it wasn’t a break. It was a break up. I specifically asked you not to come.” This was the last thing she wanted to deal with. He was making her miss the sunset. “We broke up, Chris. I’m sorry if you’re hurt or upset, but my decision is final. There isn’t anything for us to discuss.”
He scoffed and had the gall to remove her arm from the door frame so he could push his way inside. “We didn’t break up, honey. You were upset about your parents and it made you emotional. Irrational. Not to mention the unwanted interruption by your thug neighbor. Now that you’ve had some time to get your head on straight, we can talk about it like adults.”
The snort that left her made his frown deepen. He was now standing in her living room, of course, wearing a perfectly pressed suit that seemed to defy the fact that he’d been on a plane only a short time ago. With no other choice but to deal with him, she released the door and let the screen slam shut. But she didn’t have to be happy about it.
Toni jammed her hands on her hips. “That’s rich coming from someone who not only wasn’t invited but isn’t wanted. And Zach may have interrupted us, but I’d already told you we were through and I repeated it to you on the phone the other day. So you can’t blame Zach for your actions.”
Chris advanced on her, and even though he wasn’t an intimidating figure, the hair on the back of Toni’s neck stood on end. Something about the look in his eyes screamed of desperation. Desperate people were unpredictable. “Seems like you and Zach got pretty friendly. You fucking him now?”
She gasped. “What? Geez, Chris. No, I’m not fucking him. Or anyone, for that matter. But you know what? If I wanted to fuck the whole damn MC, it wouldn’t be any of your business.”
Where on earth was this coming from? Wasn’t Chris the one who always said swearing was the mark of an uneducated person? Not that she agreed with the comment, since she could swear like a sailor when riled and quite enjoyed it, but to hear him ask if she was fucking someone was so unlike him. The unease she’d felt seconds before morphed into anger as she stood on her toes in an attempt to get in his face.
Instead of firing another insulting question at her, he threw his head back and laughed as though she’d told the funniest joke in the world. “That’d be just like a whore like you, wouldn’t it?”
“Excuse me?” The unease was back in full force. Unease and nausea as his comment hit a little too close to home. Could he know? Was is possible he knew about the mistakes of her past?
“Look at you,” he flung a hand in her direction. “What the hell are you wearing? You look like a slut.”
Gazing down at herself, Toni fought for control of her tongue. And her fists. Ramming one into his arrogant mouth would feel great. “I’m wearing a halter top and cutoffs. I’m alone in my home and it’s hot out. What would you have me wear, thermals?” She took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. Hitting the jerk wouldn’t solve anything.
But boy, would it be satisfying.
“It gets hot in Chicago. You never dressed like that. Like you were for sale.”
For sale? Red clouded her vision. “Oh my God. Who are you? The clothing police? Do you even hear yourself?” She marched away and stared out the window. The sky was a gorgeous picture of pinks, purples, and oranges swirling as though an artist’s brush had created them. As had become custom, the sight brought an inner peace.
Something flickered in the corner of her field of vision. A squirrel or other small creature on Zach’s property drew her attention to his house. He had the habit of arriving home for a few minutes in the evenings when she was out on the porch. Probably going from his job at the gym to the clubhouse. He’d throw her a wave, run in his house, and be back on the bike before she fully had the chance to appreciate the view.
Would he do that tonight? Would he wonder why she wasn’t in her spot on the porch? Would he notice Chris’s car? She almost laughed out loud at the idea of Chris seeing the women that hung around the MC. If he thought she was a slut, his prude ass would drop dead right then and there.
“You know what I hear?” he asked after a few moments. “I hear you. Or I remember hearing you. ‘Fuck me harder, Chris. I want more, Chris.’” A look of disgust twisted his features as he spoke, mimicking her in a breathless tone.
How. Dare. He.
How dare he take what was supposed to be intimate, pleasurable, and special between them and turn it into something shameful. How dare he mock her desires. Sure, she liked sex. Liked it a little dirtier, a little rawer, a little rougher than he did. Hell, she just seemed to like it in general more than Mr. Missionary and Mr. Once-a-week did. He thought she was too much for him? If he only knew how much of her sexual self she suppressed when she was with him. How much she hid. How she squashed her own desires.
None of that really had anything to do with him. It was her own self-imposed restraint due to her past, but still. Nothing she asked of him, and nothing they shared, even bordered on kinky. It was as vanilla as it came.
If she was smart, she’d ask him to leave. Tell him the conversation was over and show him the door. But she was getting tired of always trying to do what was right. Always trying to pay penance for the way she’d lived her life as a teen. Instead of sticking with the character she’d created for herself, she said, “I’m sorry if my actually trying to find some enjoyment in having sex with you and your one boring position makes me a whore.”
Chris bent forward until his nose was millimeters away from hers. “You know what? My career is important. I’m a corporate attorney, for fuck’s sake. I can’t take you to meet clients, or to company functions like this. You’re an embarrassment, and I wouldn’t be caught dead with you on my arm.” His tone was low, threatening, but she wasn’t scared.
Fury is what she felt.
“So why the hell are you here?” she asked, throwing her hands up and taking three steps back. “Why would you claim we haven’t broken up if I’m such an embarrassment? If I’m such a whore. If you can’t stand to be seen with me.”
“Because I have no choice.” He spun and paced away from her, dropping to sit on her couch.
“No choice? This conversation is getting really tired, Chris. You have three seconds to explain yourself before I kick you out. Which is three seconds more than you deserve, considering the way you just spoke to me.”
He sagged like a balloon that just had its air let out. All the anger and ugliness he’d carried into her house disappeared and what remained was a defeated man. “They passed me by,” he said, in a voice so low she had to move closer to hear more. “Your uncle passed me by again for junior partner.”
A sheen of tears glistened in his eyes.
Mark never really discussed business with her. He kept his opinions about Chris’s work performance to himself. He was big on separating business from personal and thought running into Toni at firm functions and client wine-and-dines was enough line crossing. They didn’t need to talk about it afterward. She appreciated the distance, never wanting her relationship with Mark to cause Chris issues at the office.
As far Toni knew, her uncle never had any gripes about Chris’s work performance. But would he have mentioned if he did? Probably not. Though he let it be known he didn’t think Chris was the right man for Toni. Maybe that had something to do with poor performance at work and he’d never wanted to voice the concern.
With a sigh, she relaxed her posture and tried to be sympathetic to Chris’s troubles. “I’m sorry about that, Chris.” And she was. She understood spewing vile words under immense pressure. Words that would be regretted when the dust settled. But no amount of job strain gave him a pass for calling her a whore. Still, she’d try to deescalate the argument.
“I know you’ve been working yourself to the bone to make junior partner. And I can’t imagine how disappointed you feel, but if you came here hoping I’d have some insight into Uncle Mark’s thinking, you wasted your time. We don’t talk about work, especially your part in the firm. You know that.”
“Do you have any idea the pressure I’m under to make partner?”
Toni frowned and lowered herself to the couch next to him. “No, Chris. I honestly don’t. You’ve never really discussed it with me.”
“My father is displeased. He’s threatening to cut me off.” Chris dropped his head to his hands. “Everything’s a mess.”
None of this really made sense to her, but then she’d been on her own for a while. Independent and taking care of herself for years. “Chris, regardless of whether or not you made partner, you have a good career. You make good money. What does it matter if your father cuts you off at this point? You’ll survive just fine.”
Chris’s father was a jackass on a good day. He had money coming out his ears. Old money and plenty of status and prestige. He was a retired attorney himself and had worked on multiple newsworthy cases that rocketed his career to the big leagues.
“You just don’t understand.” Chris straightened. “It’s not about money. It’s about connections, status, power.”
He was right. She just didn’t get it.
“Well, Chris. I really am sorry things didn’t work out this time around, but that doesn’t mean you’ll never make partner. And I think you know we aren’t right for each other.”
“It doesn’t matter if we aren’t right for each other. We are going to be together.” There was a hardness to his voice that hadn’t been there moments ago, and the tinge of desperation was back.
“What?” She shook her head and screwed up her face. It was like he’d lost his sense in the past week.
“We are not done with each other. You will come home and we will continue to date. You’ll dress better. Classy again. You’ll accompany me when I need it. You’ll act like a lady. And you’ll put in a good word with Mark. More than that. You’ll get him to make me a junior partner. That queer would do anything for you, wouldn’t he?”
Toni clenched her teeth so hard they squeaked. She’d never experienced anger like she was feeling in that moment. White-hot fury. If there was one thing she wouldn’t stand for, it was a homophobic attitude toward her uncle and his husband. Two of the most loving, supportive, and all around incredible people she’d ever met. Anyone would be lucky to have half as wonderful a relationship as they did.
With as much calm as she could muster, she stretched her hand toward the door. “It’s time for you to leave now, Chris.”
“No, Toni. You aren’t the one calling the shots here. I hold all the cards.” This wasn’t the man she knew. Wasn’t the man she’d shared meals with, spent her weekends with, shared her goals and dreams with. This was a frantic man who’d do anything to get what he wanted. He’d lost the ability to be reasonable.
“What freaking cards, Chris? Ooo, what are you going to do? Tell everyone your monogamous girlfriend is a whore because she likes to be fucked? News flash, you’d have to admit that you couldn’t give a woman an orgasm with a roadmap and a set of instructions!” She was screaming and she didn’t even care.
A rap on the door made her spin and dropped her jaw. Zach’s bulky form filled the space on the other side of the screen. The jerk wasn’t even pretending he hadn’t been eavesdropping on the conversation. A giant smirk was plastered across his face.
Great. Just great.
What had she just screamed? Something about liking sex and Chris failing to satisfy her. All true, but mortifying.
Something like a combination of a growl and a whimper came from Chris. Like he was both warning off and intimidated by Zach at the same time. The intimidation she got, Zach would probably annihilate Chris with one half-powered punch.
But the warning? Did all men have to engage in pissing contests?
“What do you want, Zach?” she asked in a bright voice, as though false cheer could somehow erase the humiliation of what he’d overheard.
The smug grin only grew. Zach braced his arms on either side of the door frame and stared at her through the screen. Damn man. He had to know what he was doing, showing of the long, firm bulge of his biceps and stretching his shirt across his fitness model shoulders.
“You weren’t in our spot. I came to see if you needed my help.” His gaze flicked to Chris before dismissing him and returning to Toni. “I’m glad I did because, from the sound of it, you really need my help.”
Our spot? Might as well wave a red flag in front of an angry bull. Ugh. Why did a grin so smug she’d want to slap it off anyone else look like a promise of sex and sin on Zach?
It didn’t make a difference what Zach looked like, or how hot a night or two he was offering. Toni was looking for substance. Meaning. Connection beyond physical. She’d missed the boat with Chris, but at least that was an honest try. Getting tangled with Zach would be a backslide.
A delicious and mind-blowing backslide, but a regression, nonetheless.
“Thanks for the concern, but I’m good. Got all I need waiting for me in my nightstand.”
A shocked gasp burst from Chris, but Zach’s lips twitched in amusement. It would take a lot more than the threat of passing him over for a vibrator to get under his skin.
“I’m all for adding some battery-operated devices to the mix,” Zach said.
“If you’re done making vulgar propositions to my girlfriend, you can just scurry on home to your bike and your little leather orgy. I can take care of her myself.” Leave it to Chris to be all mouthy with a closed door and a woman standing between him and Zach.
She clenched her teeth. How dare Chris talk about her like she wasn’t standing right there. She didn’t need Zach to help her in any way. Time to shut this shit down herself.
Giving Zach her back, she faced Chris. “Take care of me? Please. You take care of no one but yourself. I went through a pack of batteries a week with you. Get. Out. Now.” She stepped to the side.
“Let me get the door for you, buddy,” Zach said as he opened the screen and stepped to the side.
Chris stalked forward and stopped in front of her. Leaning forward he spoke next to her ear with a promise only for her. “This isn’t over. Think about what I said.”
“I don’t need to think about anything, Chris. It’s beyond over.” She jerked her head back, very aware of Zach observing the entire exchange.
Chris righted and gave up whispering. “We can do things the easy way or the hard way, Toni. Your choice.” He walked through the open door, knocking into Zach’s shoulder in the process. If she wasn’t so fed up with men at the moment, she’d have laughed. The shove didn’t even budge Zach, but Chris bounced back as though he’d run into a rubber statue.
When she heard the screen door close, Toni dropped her head and massaged her temples.
“What the hell did he mean by that easy way or hard way shit?” Zach asked.
Without opening her eyes, she asked, “What are you still doing here, Zach?”
“Told you. You weren’t on the porch. I saw that asshat through the window. Thought you could use some backup.” She heard the heavy tread of his boots approaching, then he gripped her wrists and pulled her hands from her aching head. “Let me do that.” Strong fingers replaced hers, rubbing gentle circles on the sides of her head.
Tension relief was immediate. As was arousal. Warmth spread from his talented fingers down her shoulders and to her nipples, drawing them tight. Her sex heated too. Anticipation. Desire.
Damn him.
“As you can see, I’m fine. Annoyed, but fine. You can go.”
“Come with me.” His magic hands moved to her neck where he dug those long fingers into the tense muscles. Toni bit back a groan. Letting him know how unbelievably wonderful his touch felt would only grow his already too-healthy ego.
“Where? To your bedroom for fifteen minutes of fun before you move on to some biker bunny who’ll hop along after you with her tits and ass hanging out?” Her fear of being intimate with Zach had way more to do with herself than her worry about other women. But that was a personal tidbit she didn’t share with anyone.
His hands fell away and her eyes popped open just in time to witness him throw his head back and burst out laughing.
Even his throat is sexy.
“First of all, babe,” he said, after the hilarity ended. “Fifteen minutes? No wonder you’re taking out stock in batteries. It would take all night just to scratch the surface of what I want to do to you.”
She swallowed. Hard. All night? She hadn’t had all night in a very, very long time. Before it all went bad.
“But I’ll settle for a bonfire and some light flirting.”
“Huh?” She blinked.
He smiled. Throwing her off her game seemed to amuse him to no end. “Our VP’s ol’ lady’s birthday is tonight. Club is throwing her a party complete with a bonfire. I want you to come with me.”
“Ol’ lady, huh?”
“That’s what we call—”
She waved him away and took a step back. The closeness, the manly smell of sweat and nature was weakening her resistance. “Yeah, yeah, I know. I’ve seen Sons of Anarchy.”
Zach snorted and rolled his eyes. “I’m no Jax Teller, sweetheart.”
“Never said you were.” They stared at each other for a few heartbeats. If things were different. If she didn’t already know how choosing the wrong man, letting hormones and pheromones overrule her brain could destroy her life, she’d jump him right then and there.
“Come with me.” He stepped closer to her.
“A wild biker party, huh?”
He smirked. “Not too wild. Ol’ ladies will be there. Viper’s ol’ lady is pretty…well, let’s just say she’s pretty uninhibited, so it’s probably middle of the road as far as our parties can get. Probably a step above family barbeque and a step below naked frat party.”
That got her laughing. Going would be such a mistake. But it would also distract her from her annoyance at Chris. And she’d meet some new people. Have some fun. Maybe Shell would even be there.
“Come with me,” he said, running his hands up her arms until he cupped her shoulders.
She couldn’t help it, she shivered and her gaze cut to those tanned hands where they rested against her lighter skin. They were strong, roughened, and felt heavenly coasting over her. “I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
“No funny business, I promise.”
She tilted her head. “Just some light flirting, huh?”
The playful grin was back. “That’s right. Scout’s honor.”
Toni snorted. “Right.” Say no. Say no. “Okay.”
Now his grin was one of victory. “You ever been on a bike?”
She shook her head and bit her bottom lip to keep from telling him how much the thought of it excited her.
“You’ll love it. Not that I want anything to cover those sexy stems of yours, ever, but you’d better throw on some jeans. Riding in shorts isn’t fun, especially the first time.”
“Okay.”
“And make ’em tight. If we’re gonna have a look-but-don’t-touch rule for that ass, I want to at least have the best visual possible.”
Toni chuckled and rolled her eyes as she turned toward her room. The crack of Zach’s palm across her ass made her yelp and glare at him, mostly to hide the hot flare of desire that rose from her core.
Being the scoundrel that he was, he raised his hands in a pose of surrender and laughed. “Just the one, promise.”
Light flirting, yeah right. Maybe by his definition. But by anyone else’s, it was bound to be a night of extreme temptation.
Toni was strong. She’d been resisting temptation for years.
But temptation in the form of motorcycle-riding, tattoo-sporting, muscle-wielding Zach was a whole new level of torture.
She had a feeling his light flirting only offer was just the spider luring the fly to its web. It had been exactly one week since he issued his decree after all.
He was coming for her.