Chapter 9 – Virginia

We were back in the rented car again and Carl was conspicuously quiet while he drove. In fact, he hadn’t said a word since we had left the hotel.

I still couldn’t get over how amazing the previous night had been. I had fantasized about that night for so long, when Carl would be the one to take my virginity, but I had never pictured it happening the way it did. We hadn’t even had sex, and yet he had made me orgasm just with his fingers. I hadn’t even had the chance to see him completely naked. I hadn’t seen the part of him that I wanted to see the most.

Carl muttered something under his breath as he drove now, and I could see that he was mad at something.

I was hoping that he was just in a bad mood because my dad had called him and told him that I was unsafe at the hotel. In fact, I didn’t even know what exactly Dad had told him because Carl had shared nothing with me.

“Where are we going?” I dared to ask him. He kept his dangerous blue eyes focused on the road. The more I stared at his profile, the more flashes of the previous night whirled through my head.

I could still feel the bristle of his beard on my breasts as he sucked on my nipples. I was dripping wet between the legs by the time he had taken my panties off. I had never imagined that just having his finger inside me could make me explode like that.

“I booked a cabin for us while you were packing your bags. That’s where we’re going,” he replied. Carl’s eyes were bloodshot and he was barely even looking at me. His fury was more than just about my safety. I could see that now. He regretted what had happened the previous night, and I didn’t want him to blame himself.

“Carl . . . about last night,” I said and I saw him clench his jaw. He said nothing and the fact that he didn’t command me to stop talking gave me the courage to keep going.

“I want you to know that it was perfect. It was everything that I could have hoped for from my first time,” I murmured. He was still gritting his teeth. He was driving like he was desperate to get to our destination.

“It can’t happen again. It was a mistake and I take full responsibility for it,” he said. I shifted in my seat, to turn to face him fully.

“I don’t want you to blame yourself in any way, Carl. It’s what I wanted. I’m an adult and you don’t have to take responsibility for anything!” I said, and I could hear my voice getting high pitched. I wanted him to just give himself a break for a minute, to just stop blaming himself and let me in. Maybe then I would be able to convince him that he was exactly who I wanted.

Carl kept driving, clutching the steering wheel so tight that I could see his knuckles turning white.

“Carl . . . I . . . ” I said, and he jerked his head around to look at me.

“It won’t happen again. That’s the end of that,” he snapped and I clamped my mouth shut and turned away from him.

How was it so difficult for him to see me as an adult? To see me as someone who could make her own life choices?

Carl screeched the car to a halt outside a wooden cabin that had been half hidden by the snow. Under any other circumstance, I would have been bubbling with excitement at the sight of the pretty little place. It was surrounded by pine trees and its driveway was covered with snow. Carl drove the car down to the front of the porch, and we saw a man opening the door and stepping out.

“Ah, you must be Mr. Brown!” the man exclaimed excitedly, as he descended down the steps.

Carl and I got out of the car, and I realized that he had given the man a fake name.

“Yes, you’re right. You have the key for us, Mr. Sanders?” Carl asked as I pulled my bag out of the car.

“Right here, there’s one bedroom and a bathroom, and a kitchen where you can cook and a cozy little fireplace in the living room. I can show you around if you like,” the man was saying to Carl.

I had heard the words distinctly. There was only one bedroom.

“That won’t be necessary, Mr. Sanders. I can take it from here. Did you say there is only one bedroom?” Carl asked as I walked past them and on to the porch. I could feel my heart racing in my chest again.

“Yes, will that be a problem?” the man said. I turned to look at Carl, who was refusing to meet my eyes.

“No, no problem,” Carl said and took his wallet out to hand over a thick wad of cash to the man.

“And like I said, Mr. Sanders, we would like it if we weren’t disturbed,” Carl said and the man nodded his head enthusiastically.

“Of course, of course, I completely understand. I hope you enjoy your stay,” the man was saying, but Carl had already started to walk away. He passed me on the steps of the porch.

“Get inside, Virginia,” I heard him say gruffly and I looked around to see Mr. Sanders trudging through the snow and out of the gates of the driveway.

Even though I knew that Carl was in a bad mood, and I also had a pretty good idea that he was going to keep pushing me away, I couldn’t help the smile that was forming on my face. He and I were going to be alone in a snowy wooden cabin together in the middle of nowhere. How much more romantic could my life get?