“Sit with me,” he requested, patting the mattress at his side. I immediately settled down, lacing my fingers through his.

He took a deep breath. He seemed to do that a lot; he considered his words carefully before he spoke. I appreciated that. He didn’t speak in anger, and he’d taken a while to gather his thoughts every time he’d shared one of the deepest secrets of his soul.

I sensed this was one of those times. He was about to reveal another facet of himself to me, even if he wouldn’t tell me a fact about his life. This was far more important than telling me his hometown or even his last name—something I desperately wanted to know, but I understood why he hadn’t volunteered the information.

I waited in silence, allowing him time to prepare whatever he needed to say.

“I want to help you,” he said. “If you just liked kinky sex, I don’t think I could do this. But the way you talk about it… It’s something you need. And I like it. I’m so fucking turned on by what I’ve shared with you, what we’ve done together. I like giving you pleasure, taking care of you. You say being submissive is just who you are, and you’ve always been this way. Well, I’m built this way: to protect those who need it most. I might not be protecting you from an outside threat, but this is its own kind of protection. I can see that now. I just don’t know…”

He trailed off, his eyes darkening with some thought he didn’t voice.

“What is it?” I urged softly. “You can talk to me.”

“I don’t know if I can separate this from violence. The things I’ve seen.”

“Like you said: you’re helping me. I do need this. And it’s okay that you’ve enjoyed it. Do you know how wet I get when you take control? How much it meant to me that you put my own wellbeing above your desire to fuck me last night? That turns me on, and I’m not ashamed. You shouldn’t be, either.”

Acting on bold intuition, I spread my legs and directed his hand between my thighs. “Feel how much I want you.”

His fingers brushed my soaked folds, and I shuddered as pleasure rolled through me. He pressed inside, stretching me and testing my arousal. My breaths quickened, my pulse ticking up. I spread my legs wider, inviting him deeper. He leaned into me, until his lips teased across mine as he spoke.

“Tell me what you want.” The command was roughened by lust.

“Spank me,” I panted. “I want to feel my ass burning under your hand. Then, I want you to fuck me hard.”

“Fuck, you’re creaming all over my hand.”

My inner muscles contracted around his fingers as lust surged. “Please. I want you, Scott.” I brushed my cheek against his so I could whisper in his ear. “I want you, Sir.”

His fingers curled inside me, pressing hard against my g-spot. “You really shouldn’t call me that,” he warned over my ecstatic shout.

My lashes fluttered, but I forced myself to stay in the moment with him. I couldn’t float off into bliss. Not yet.

“Why not?” I managed to whimper.

“Because I like it too fucking much.”

I traced the shell of his ear with my tongue. “Spank me, Sir. I want you to mark me.”

He cursed again, and suddenly his touch left my sex. His strong hands gripped my hips. The world spun around me, and I found myself draped face-down over his lap.

A delighted giggle burst from my lips.

His fingers curved into my ass, squeezing hard through the silky material of my robe. “Is this funny to you?”

“No, Sir,” I gasped out at the little bite of pain inflicted by his harsh hold. “I’m just happy. I tend to get giddy and laugh.”

He eased his grip, stroking the area he’d grabbed. “I like when you laugh. It’s a beautiful sound.”

I nuzzled his calf, rubbing against him like a content kitten as I settled into my submissive headspace. “Thank you.”

“So, you can take a compliment,” he remarked. “I should bend you over my knee more often.”

I wiggled my ass at him. “You definitely should.”

His hand skimmed under my robe, slowly sliding the silky material to my waist so my bottom was exposed. He touched my wet slit, stroking my sensitive folds. I shuddered and pushed back against him with a wanton moan.

“Do you trust me?” he asked, his voice low and serious.

I craned my neck back so I could look up at him. “Yes,” I vowed. “And I need you to trust me, too. I need you to trust that I’ll tell you if it’s too much.”

He rubbed his palm over my ass, lighting up my nerve endings so I became fully aware of his sensual touch. I practically vibrated in his hold, desperate and hot for him.

“I trust you, too.”

I beamed at him. “Good.”

I felt more connected to him than ever. The bond we were establishing was far more significant than being punished by a skilled Top. We were learning to trust one another, but he was also learning to trust himself, even if he didn’t realize it.

When I’d first met him in Nashville, he hadn’t been able to trust himself to get aggressive with me. He hadn’t been able to separate his life of violence from kinky games.

Now, he appeared more at peace than I’d ever seen him. The tormented light was absent from his eyes, and his touch on my body was assured. The idea of hurting me no longer caused him anguish. He understood that this was what I needed, but I wasn’t certain if he understood yet that this was what he needed, too.

Just as he did when he gathered his thoughts, he took a deep breath and let it out on a long exhale. Calm settled over him, and he continued to stroke my ass, learning the curve of my body. I felt precious, revered.

Longing layered over my lust. This was what I’d always fantasized about. I craved this connection, and I never wanted it to break.

I continued to stare up at him, needing to read his expression. His pale eyes were focused on my ass, completely absorbed in what he was about to do.

The first slap was gentle, but there was intent behind it: a deliberate calculation of force. He delivered another on my opposite cheek, spreading out the warmth. He hit lower, catching the sensitive seam where my ass met my upper thighs.

I gasped and shifted away. The movement made my clit rub against his leg. I shivered and sighed, immediately arching my back and presenting myself for more.

His warm palm rested on my enflamed skin, sending heat permeating through my flesh to lick at my core.

“More. Harder.”

He delivered a sharp, stinging hit. “Are you supposed to be this demanding?”

“No, Sir,” I groaned, my head dropping forward as I fell deeper into my submissive headspace. “Harder, please.”

“That’s better.” His voice was rough, but not with anger. His cock pressed against my belly. I wasn’t the only one who got turned on when he took control.

He delivered another stinging slap, obviously affected by my begging. This hit was harder. It thudded deep into my flesh, and he held his palm against me so the heat sank through my skin. My inner muscles fluttered in response, and I squirmed on his lap as primal urges took over.

“I need you to fuck me. Please.” I released my plea on a strangled cry when he spanked me again.

“I’m not finished. Nowhere close.” His voice was hoarse with lust, and his cock strained against my hips.

I whined in need, but I didn’t beg him again. He’d fuck me when he was ready. Now, all I could do was submit to his will. The release I found in surrendering to him was intoxicating. Even as he continued to inflict stinging pain, I let out a long, blissful sigh as my entire body softened in submission.

He paused. “Are you okay?”

“Mmm,” I hummed, past the point of verbal articulation. I wiggled my ass, welcoming more.

When his palm struck me again, it landed on my swollen pussy lips. My shocked squeal melted to a moan when he stroked away the sting. Liquid heat dripped down my thighs, coating his fingers with my desire.

“Is my good girl horny?” he rumbled.

All I could manage was a strained whimper as I writhed on his lap, wordlessly begging him to penetrate me.

He obliged me, thrusting his fingers into my wet sheath in one brutal motion. I cried out at the intrusion, pleasure flooding my system in response to the rough treatment.

“You want it hard? You want me to fuck this tight pussy?”

“Yes, Sir,” I panted. “Yes!” I shrieked my affirmation as his fingertips pressed down on my g-spot, stimulating deep inside me.

I came apart under his hands, my entire body shuddering with the force of my orgasm. “Thank you, thank you.” I released my gratitude in a mindless litany as bliss sang through my veins, sending me flying high.

My inner walls were still spasming with the aftermath of my pleasure when he abruptly withdrew from me. He gripped my hips and shifted my body, moving me easily with his vastly superior strength.

He positioned me so I bent over the edge of the bed, resting the weight of my torso on my elbows. I spread my legs wide, offering my pussy to him.

My eyes were closed in residual ecstasy, but I heard him undressing behind me. I heard the condom wrapper tear, and seconds later, his cock pressed against my entrance.

I gasped in shock when his hand fisted in my hair. He didn’t pull, but he kept me anchored in place as he slowly penetrated me. I tried to push back against him and increase his pace, but his free hand slapped my thigh in reprimand.

I groaned and stilled, bliss washing through me as I sank further into submission. He thoroughly controlled my body, my pleasure.

He withdrew at a pace that made me ache. My core throbbed to the point of discomfort, my body primed and desperate for more. I’d become a purely sexual being, caught up in a torrent of lust. My mind receded to its most primal state, and my entire being was completely consumed by need.

“Please,” I whimpered.

He spanked me, but not in rebuke. He was urging me on. “Again,” he commanded gruffly. “Beg me for pleasure. Beg me to make you come.”

“Please, Sir. Please, let me come.” My sex squeezed him in response to his deviant demand. I was so close to the edge, but his will kept me barely tethered to sanity. I wanted to please him. I wouldn’t come without permission. Gritting my teeth, I resisted the pleasure that tempted and tormented me.

He began to drive into me, hard and fast. “Hold on,” he hissed through gritted teeth. “Not yet. Wait for me.”

His hand left my hair so his fingers could sink into my hips. He pulled my body back, guiding me to fuck him in time with his harsh thrusts.

“Now,” he growled, increasing his pace.

I felt his cock pulse inside me, his orgasm granting me permission to succumb to my own. The knowledge that I’d brought him pleasure sent me rocketing over the edge, and I screamed as I came. He drove in deep one last time, holding himself inside me as he finished. My inner muscles fluttered helplessly around him, ecstasy pulsing through me.

My arms shook, and my muscles turned to jelly. I collapsed onto the mattress, breathing hard. His arms closed around me, lifting me and repositioning my body so I laid on the bed, a pillow cushioning my head. He settled in beside me, pulling me close to his chest.

We lay there for a long time, holding one another. He stroked my back, and I lightly scratched his in the way I’d discovered he liked.

“I have to go,” he finally murmured.

I propped up on one elbow, trying and failing to smother a small frown. “Can I at least get your number? We could text.”

He trailed his fingers through my hair, his touch gentle and apologetic. “I can’t do that. I’m sorry. But I’ll see you when I can.”

My frown deepened. “That’s not fair. I can’t just live my life waiting for you to show up.”

His eyes tightened. “I don’t expect you to wait for me. But I’ll come back for you. I’ll fight for you, if I have to.”

“I don’t want you to fight for me. I just want you to stay.” I let out a shuddering sigh, steeling myself. “But I know you can’t.”

“I’m sorry. I really do have to go now. I’ve already stayed too long.”

I swallowed against the lump in my throat and nodded. He got dressed, but I stayed tucked under the covers, lingering in the warmth of his body heat that had been trapped beneath the duvet.

He brushed a kiss across my forehead and turned from me.

I took a breath as he walked away, reminding myself that he’d promised to return.