Imperial

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Pushing against his shoulders, I forced our lips apart. “What the hell was that? I don't know what—”

Forcing me into silence, he asked, “I thought. . . I don't know. Did you want that?”

I do. . . I don't. . . I—

What the hell do I want?

His eyes searched my face, hands falling free from my hair. Sliding his palms up and down his thighs, he stood up, turning away from me. “You're right, that won't happen again.”

“It's not that, it's just. . .” Fiddling with my lips, I could still feel the warmth from his skin against mine. “I don't know, everything is just too much right now. I'm not sure if it's real, fake, another fucking show.”

“Too much? Can things be anymore fucked up than they already are?” Dropping back down, he gripped the sides of his head, rubbing his temples. “None of this is right, not one fucking second of it. But you, I can't understand it, but you are.” Grunting to himself, he threw his hands onto the back of his scalp, bending into his waist. “You're getting into my head, Imperial, I don't know if that's good or not.”

Kicking my feet back and forth over the floor, I tucked my hands under my thighs. My nerves were twisting, coiling tight and fast like a tornado. They were reeking havoc on my insides, making me question everything I thought he was.

He was supposed to be evil, he was supposed to be a killer, a bastard, a piece of fucking shit for everything he was putting me through. But that wasn't who I was seeing anymore.

I saw kindness, I saw weakness, I saw all the things he wasn't allowed to ever show outside these walls.

Machi was a man.

Shaking his head in his hands, he jerked his body upright. “It's not good, none of this is good. This—” Drawing long lines with his finger between us, Machi's voice tumbled out quick. “This can't happen, it just can't. If we cross this line, then everything I've been working for is gone, it's done, all of it will be over. Not that it matters, I'm barely living as it is.”

“But—”

“No,” he snapped, jumping to his feet and pacing in small circles. “I have to do what I came here for. If I get lost in you, if one ounce of my head isn't thinking straight because I'm thinking about you, then all of this will be for nothing.” Throwing his arm out, it hit an invisible wall at his side. “Fuck, Imperial.” Spinning on his heel, his fingers clenched the bridge of his nose as he turned his back to me.

“Will you just shut up and let me finish?” Opening my eyes wide, I let my head dangle over my shoulder. “I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me, but I want it, and I don't know why.”

“What?” he asked, his head slowly ticking over his shoulder. “What the hell do you mean?”

“You're not what I thought you were, I can see that now.” My heart impaled my ribs, crashing so forcefully I expected it to leap from my chest and land on the floor. “I just don't know what to do with that.”

Chuckling, Machi groaned in despair. “I'm exactly what you thought I was. You have no idea, Imperial, the things I've done—” Lowering his gaze to the floor, he shook his head. “I'm going to hell.”

“Tell me then, tell me so I can be afraid of you. Tell me so I can stop my heart from hitting warp speed when you touch me, tell me so I can stop thinking about how it felt in your arms and how good it felt to have your hands on my body.”

“I can't tell you shit because it doesn't matter. I'm here, I don't want to be, but I am. But you, you don't belong here, and whatever you think you feel, forget it.”

“Yes, it does matter. You want me to trust you, you're telling me you're going to help me get out. Then give me something to hold onto, give me something to cling to so I can understand. You say you're not a monster—but now you say you are? Which one is it? If you don't want to be here, why not just leave? What's keeping you?”

“I'm a bad man, I'm a horrible person, but I wasn't built this way. I'm here for a reason, for a purpose, and I'm not leaving until it's done. Knowing why doesn't change anything for you. Knowing what created me, knowing why I'm here, that would only hurt us both. You're innocent here like this, just the way you are. If you knew, blood will be on your hands too. If they found out that you knew the truth, you'd be just as dead as me.”

He wasn't scaring me, he wasn't forcing me to see him in a different light. If he had wanted me to hate him then he would have just let this place have me.

If he wanted to be the man he claimed he was, he wouldn't have penetrated my mind or found a way to claw into my heart.

And he wouldn't be trying to save me.

Standing up, I pushed in close, brushing my fingertips over his jaw, forcing him to look at me. His eyes were glossy, lost in a memory that he refused to share.

I felt for him, for the pain he kept hidden and the hate he had to live with. Something was eating at his insides, pushing him into a world he didn't want to begin with.

“Tell me or don't tell me, but I can see who you are. I can really see what sits behinds the surface and it's not evil, no matter what you think.” My thumb ran over his bottom lip, swiping against the stubble on his chin.

Machi watched me as a soft twitch pulsed in his jaw. Running his eyes over my face, they settled on my lips. Drawing in a slow breath, he reached out and gripped my wrists in his hands.

The feel of his skin on mine sizzled up my arms, lighting a fire in my chest and that made my heart pound. There was something there, something that I couldn't put into words.

It was just a feeling, an emotion, a warmth and a chill all in the same breath.

Leaning forward, he steadied himself, stopping just before our mouths touched. “No matter what happens, I meant what I said, I promise I'll keep you safe.”

Nodding, ours lips brushed and the electricity snapped across the surface, making my mouth tingle. “I know,” I whispered as my eyes darted up to his and back to his jaw.

Is he waiting for me?

Am I supposed to control this kiss?

His hands swept around my back, tugging me into his chest, silencing my thoughts. Our bodies pressed together as Machi crashed his lips onto mine, sucking and kissing, tasting and devouring.

That kiss, that one single instant of passion was all I needed to know he was real. Machi had secrets, he held onto something that he couldn't let go of, but whatever it was, it didn't make him evil.

I knew he would stand by his promises.

Scooping me up, he carried me to the bed and set me down, never allowing our mouths to break apart. His eyes were open, drowning my body with a tsunami of unspoken words.

Not one piece of my brain was questioning what I was doing. Machi was a tall glass of water and I had just walked through a desert. Need was all around me.

I needed him.

I needed his help, his hands, his voice, his eyes. . . Everything.

Pressing down on my chest, my nipples perked, eagerly begging to be plucked and nibbled, suckled and licked. Arching my back, I rocked my hips, scratching my nails down his back.

Sucking my bottom lip, Machi broke our kiss with a tender exhale. “I don't know why you make me feel this way, Imperial, no woman has ever made my heart come to life with just a single touch.” His cheek brushed mine as his lips found the delicate skin behind my ear. Biting softly, he growled into my ear. “Fuck, what I want to do to you. . . It's going to get me killed.”

Jerking my head away, Machi lifted his eyes to mine, peering deep into my stare. “Is that what this means?” Following the lines of his tattoo on his neck, I traced it lightly. “Does this mean you belong to them?”

“No, it has nothing to do with them. That's for me.”

“What does it mean?” Angling my head, I continued to swirl my fingers over the black ink.

“It's the symbol for pain.”

“Why pain? Why not something else, something that isn't so dark?”

His eyes turned to glass, glancing away as he swallowing hard. “Pain is the only thing I can remember feeling; not love, not happiness—just the hurt of the life I lived. I have nothing left outside these walls. And when I'm done here, only pain will set me free. Once you're gone, so am I.”

The last thing I wanted was for anyone else to get hurt, I didn't want him to risk his life for mine. Maybe it was stupid and immature, but in my head I imagined both of us walking away unharmed.

I shouldn't have been so naive to think that coming out unscathed was possible. Not here, not in a place like this. This was a dark business, one that ran off the buying and selling of women.

There were no second chances built off promises of unspoken words. Deep down I knew I was in denial, because willingly accepting the truth of certain death doesn't come natural.

No one can stand tall knowing that they're going to die. How do you go on knowing the end was close?

He's in and they'll never let him out. The only way out is with his life.

“I don't want you to die because of me, it's not worth it.” Scrunching my brows, my lips pursed tight.

Trailing his thumb down the curve of my jaw, his fingers swept over my throat. “I'm not telling you that to scare you. I'm telling you because you are worth it.” Lowering his mouth to my neck, he dragged his teeth over the skin. “I already have a reason to die, but you, you gave me a reason to want to live. But choices—my choices, they'll decide what happens to me.”

There was so much emotion in his voice, filled with raw truth and nothing else. He meant what he was saying, he breathed the words he played for my heart.

And I inhaled every last one.

Wrapping my hands around the back of his head, I crashed my lips onto his. Machi might have been the man who had taken me, but he was going to be the man that set me free.

Whatever sparked between us, it went deep. I barely knew him and yet it felt like I had known him for years. His weaknesses were strengths, his black soul was a blend of good and evil.

Comfort, protection, safety, desire, lust; Machi was all of that.

Touching his cheek, I whispered. “And you gave me a reason to survive.” Forcing my voice into his head, his face snapped up, eyes fluttering in the sockets.

Holding his breath, Machi studied me as I laid beneath him. He never expected me to embrace who he was, to see behind the mask and understand the man he had to be.

He wasn't a monster, he wasn't like the other men around us. Machi had blood running through his veins, but it wasn't thick as tar, it flowed with tragedy from a past he still lived in. He was there because of the pain he held onto, he was there because something had driven him into it.

I wasn't going to hate or condemn him for choices he had to make. Because he wasn't his choices, he was his words.

Machi didn't speak, he allowed the air between us to heat on its own. There was nothing he needed to say.

His fingers dipped under the seam of my bra, pushing it up to expose my breasts. My nipples were hard as diamonds as goosebumps broke over my skin.

Raking my nails through his hair, Machi circled one breast with his tongue, swirling in closer and closer to the hardened bead.

Arching my back, I clutched his skull and forced my breast against his mouth, pressing my nipple into his lips and moaning. The tip of his tongue teased his mouth, jetting out in fast laps as he flicked and tasted the tender skin.

My pussy was pulsing, growing wetter and wetter as I ground against his lower belly. “Fuck me, Machi, please fuck me.” Moaning loudly, I rolled my head to the side and scratched my nails down his chest.

“Are you sure you want this?” he asked, dragging his tongue up my chest and throat. “I come with danger, Imperial, can you handle that?”

“Is that a threat?” My hips thrust into his waist, rubbing against the thick bulge in his jeans. “Because I'm not afraid of you.” Tracing his abs with the tips of my fingers, I drew long strokes up and down the hardened stone.

“You should be. . .” His voice trailed off as his lips found mine, kissing me forcefully. Tugging away, he plucked my lower lip between his teeth with a grin. “You should be.”

Sweat had beaded up across his forehead, making his skin glisten. I watched a small drop break free, trickling down his temple and curving over his cheekbone.

That single drop held my gaze, it forced me still as I followed its path around the curve, watching it come to a stop on the edge of his lip. Balancing on the crest, it dangled dangerously, wiggling in fear when it couldn't hold on any longer.

I'm that drop, I'm that one insignificant drop, teetering on the edge of sanity.

And I was ready, I was ready to break free and fall into whatever the future had waiting.

“I'm not, now shut up and fuck me.” Wanton need flashed in my eyes as my lids lowered, brushing lashes to lashes.

Sweeping his hands around my back, Machi lifted me off the mattress as his fingers worked to tear open the button on his pants. Freeing his cock, he pulled me onto his lap and flicked my panties to the side.

The tip of his cock pressed my entrance, slipping in with ease. Our eyes stayed on each other, never looking away, never leaving the other alone.

And that, that sealed me to him. The way his eyes saw me and not just my body, the way they spoke emotion and weren't just lifeless mirrors showing me my own reflection.

Maybe he plans on buying me for himself.

The thought was quick, it zipped through my brain and brought comfort and excitement to everything he was hinting at. If he bought me for himself, he could send me home. If he bought me for himself, he could do anything he wanted with me.

I'd be his and his alone.

No one could touch me, no one could tell him what to do with me. He would have the power to set me free and there was nothing anyone else could do about it.

It made sense to me, his small hints and signals about just listening to him. If I was going to be sold, how else could he be sure I'd end up safe?

Only if he buys me himself.

Machi's fingers dug into my hips as he lifted his waist slowly. “Fuck,” I moaned, curling my arms around his neck as his cock slid deep inside.

My skin was hot to the touch, igniting like a fresh fire, breathing in the fuel it ached to have. I didn't think about where I was, I didn't think about what had happened or what was coming my way.

I gave myself to him.

Machi had all of me; my body, my heart, my fucking soul. He might have been my captor, but right then, he became my freedom.

Pushing up on my knees, I dropped back down, forcing his cock to hit my lower belly. Slipping his fingers down my waist, he clutched my ass, giving one hard snap of his hips.

Pump after pump we lost ourselves in each other, not paying attention to anything else. There was no time, no schedule, nothing.

It was just us and the all seeing eyes of the room that didn't have a voice. Another story that would get lost in the walls and paint the room in more than just pain.

My nipples scraped his chest as I lifted up on my knees and fell down hard, driving him inside as far as he could go.

Heavy grunts spilled out from the back of his throat as he fucked me. Grinding into him, his muscles tensed, arms stiffening as his lids slammed shut. Moaning loudly, Machi's pace quickened, thrusting harder and harder.

Tingles swept through my body, buzzing over my skin and hitting my stomach. In one final pump, I felt his cock throb, filling my pussy with his life blood. Beat after beat, his cock twitched against my walls as he bit down on his lip and groaned.

My body electrified, exploding with sensations that traveled from head to toe. Curling my toes, the orgasm rose until I finally fell off the peak, tumbling down the other side.

Dropping my head against his shoulder, my heart raced inside my chest. I couldn't feel anything else right then except us. Our lungs were heaving together, our muscles were shivering together, and in that moment, I finally felt safe.

His fingers tickled across my back, following my spine and circling my shoulders. “You know what this means, Imperial, right?”

“What?” I asked, taking in long, slow breaths of air. “What does this mean?”

Raking his fingers through my hair, he teased the ends, pulling them and twisting them around his hand. “Either we live or we die, there is no in between now.”

Sitting up straight, I had to see his face. I had already known that death was sitting by just waiting for the right moment. All I could do was wish for the end or the chance to live. . .

What else was there?

How could there ever be an in between?

“I don't understand, isn't death or staying alive the only options anyway?”

Drawing his lips in tight, he gently placed his palm against my cheek. “The in between is where you feel everything you want to run from, it's where you beg for hell to gobble you up or you wish for the heavens to swoop down and save you. It's the worst place to be in and it's how I've lived for the past few years. Every last second needs to count and it's what we do with it that will make the difference.”

“Machi,” I said, laying my hand over his. “I've been counting the seconds since I got here.”

He wanted to think that choices needed to be made now, but he was wrong.

He started making choices the moment he took me.

And I had been counting down the time since.