Chapter
36

He didn’t take me to the bedroom. No, not my Caesar. He lifted me into his strong arms and slammed me, face first, into the wide windows framing his penthouse. Agony screamed through me and warmed my blood. I tasted metallic liquid as my tongue licked the window, leaving a reddish smear.

“Fucking weak!” I yelled at him.

“We’ll see,” he argued.

Then he positioned me, my breasts pancaked against the frigid glass, palms flat next to them, and my ass pushed out. “I’m going to turn that pretty ass of yours black and blue, and then I’m going to fuck it.”

I curled my toes and waited on baited breath.

He didn’t give me time to assimilate. He slapped my ass, the hit echoing in the room. “Count that shit, Ash.”

“One!”

He struck again, this time on the other cheek.

“Two!”

“Good fucking girl.”

Counting blurred in between the initial sting and warmth left behind. Tears pooled in my eyes and my throat worked. There was beauty in pain, a release where I didn’t have to make a choice. I didn’t have to wonder if he’d hurt me, I knew he would. I didn’t need to think, only listen to his commands. The darkness didn’t scare me as it dimmed the sides of my vision. It warmed me and took me deep into my mind. To the place where my brain function streamlined to a fuzzy place. He shifted down to my legs and pushed them apart roughly before he released me.

“Don’t move,” he said.

And I didn’t. I couldn’t imagine not obeying his every word. Even when I heard his belt buckle and the material slide against fabric, I kept myself still for him.

“This will hurt, baby.”

I know.

He stepped back away from me, taking his heat away, and then he replaced it with sweet anguish. The belt sliced along the inside of my right thigh, stealing my breath. It took a second, my synapses misfiring in confusion, before the fire spread. Then I cried out. But Caesar didn’t stop. He swung again, hitting the other thigh, before he struck again at the first. Over and over.

One, two. One, two.

And my flesh peeled away. I was a bloody mess, but he pushed me further.

“Does this feel like a pussy? Hmm?”

“No,” I gasped out. Drool slid down my neck and pooled between my breasts.

“Tell me your secret, Ash,” he demanded.

“Fuck me,” I challenged.

“Bad girl.”

The belt blazed across my back, my thighs, calves, and back to my shoulders. He hit me everywhere, too fast and random to prepare. I twitched and moaned, screamed my agony, but it released me. I paid for every day I spent without him, all those moments I’d been afraid and hadn’t called him. I paid for letting him send me away and the pain it caused him. He worked out his agony on my skin, and I castigated myself at his altar. This was how we worshipped, how we fucking loved. I felt it, in the way he caressed me with the belt, in the way he begged me to never leave with hits.

“Tell. Me.”

“No.”

He tossed the belt aside, and the clink of the buckle on the ground was loud. Then I heard him spit, and a glob of wetness slid between my ass crack.

Don’t prepare me. Rip me. Make me yours again. Punish me for wanting to be without you.

“That’s all you get,” he warned, and I moaned.

Yes.

The broad head of his cock pressed into my anus and I sucked in a breath.

“One last time. Tell me.”

I shook my head. I needed it. I knew what he’d do, and I craved it, more than my next breath. I needed him to break me, and I’d still be standing at the end. I’d know how strong I’d always been. How much stronger he’d made me.

“You’re always going to be mine.”

His words were my lube, his hot hands on my hips the balm. He slammed his cock into my ass, claiming that last place he hadn’t. I split around him and screamed. Screamed my secret because, connected with him, I couldn’t hold it in any longer. “I love you.”

He fucked me with deep, hard thrusts, pushing the pain in deeper, cracking me open wide. “Say it again.”

“I love you!” I hollered.

“Fucking again!”

“I love you.”

He didn’t stop, and I couldn’t talk any longer. I clenched my ass around his thick cock and took him as deep as he wanted to go. His balls slapped my clit with each thrust, and pleasure streaked with the pain. The two opposing sensations merged and swelled inside of me. His cock hurt and revitalized me. His balls pleased and taunted me. His body curled around my sore form, both caging and protecting me. This was what we were, what I’d come to need without realizing it.

I needed to be hurt and cherished, understood and released, controlled and set free. But Caesar had known, had been formed in the fires of Hell to give me what I wanted. His hot breath pelted my shoulder as his sharp teeth sank into my flesh. He anchored me in place, a rabid animal staking his claim. My womb clenched, and my legs shook under the weight. I could die, just like this. Fade into nothing, and at least I’d know I had a love like this. Felt pleasure deeper because pain was there, too.

“Fuck, so good, baby. Take it all.”

He screwed his hips against my sore ass, sparking more sensations over my nerves until I was overwhelmed. It pulled me under, that foggy place in my mind exploding with need and pleasure. I came, my body bearing down around him, and it was deeper, more profound than it had ever been before.

“I’m not through with you,” he said.

He let us sink to the floor but kept my body pressed against the window. I was on my knees, having left a trail of spit, blood, and mist behind. On the floor, his leverage changed. He fucked up into me, the angle shift changing my orgasm. Our bodies slapped together as the musk of sex filled the air. I creamed down my legs, my pussy clenching around nothing, aching to be filled there, too.

“More,” I forced out.

“Your pussy, too? Greedy little cunt.”

But he reached around my hip and pushed his hand between my legs. I moaned as he speared me with his fingers. Not one or two, like a gentleman, but all his fingers, like the fucking boss he was. He forced me to take it all, filling me, pressing against the thin membrane separating my pussy and anal cavity. I felt full, too full, and riding on a razor-sharp edge, ready to fall over at any time. He controlled every part of me, spun my world around him. The faded lights of Miami disappeared behind nothingness, and I couldn’t focus on it if I wanted to. The small specks of people, like ants from this high, meant even less.

What did they know of a world like this? Caesar had fooled them all. He was a monster within their fold, a predator stalking them at every step. And I’d become his prey—trapped, controlled, and kept. From the moment I’d first seen him at that movie theater so long ago, I belonged to him. There could’ve been no other outcome between us. He always told me he kept what belonged to him, and he’d been right. Even when he’d let me go there was an invisible thread—a leash—holding me to him. I only went as far as he allowed, no matter what we’d both thought.

His thick cock slammed into me, and my body went limp against him. I couldn’t do more than hold on, ride the wave of his possession until we both faded. He gripped my hips, and I knew the skin would bruise, that the insides of my thighs would be black and blue, scarred from his touch. The scars would fade, but I’d wear them inside. I’d know his touch, what it meant to be owned by him. But in his touch, I also felt desperation. In beatings, I felt need and obsession. He hurt me because he had to, because I fucking loved it. He did these things to me because, for the first time, he had someone who could handle it, love it and him with equal fervor. His cock swelled inside me, and he pushed into me in jerky movements, his climax near. I arched my back until it hurt and clenched my ass around him.

“Fuck yeah, just like that, Ashlyn. I love you. I fucking love you.”

He came as his words faded, and the world exploded. I didn’t even realize I needed those words, more than just his actions. That I needed reassurance that I had claimed him. My Caesar. The man of my dreams. He loved me, hurt me, cared for me, and was darker than my night, so I could know what it was to have the light.

THE END