CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Ramsbury Castle
Late April
Spring was coming.
Belladonna could smell it in the air. The heavy snows from winter had melted away and the land was beginning to turn green once again, although the weather was still very cold at times. Still, the land and sky had a fresh feel to them, signaling the approach of a warmer season.
At Ramsbury Castle, things had been very different for the past two months. As Belladonna passed from the kitchen yard and into the keep, she found herself reflecting on the past fifty-one days since their return from Chadlington. She’d counted every one of those days, because every single day she woke up expecting the events with Dash, and Chadlington, and Clayton, to have been a dream. She kept expecting to wake up to a world that was just as it had been for the past three years, but every morning Dashiell would greet her with a discreet kiss that told her she was not dreaming.
Her love for Dashiell, and his love for her, was very real.
Real and growing.
It was like heaven. Belladonna never knew she could be so happy. But even in her happiness, there were things around her that were very different – Clayton was imprisoned in the vault of Ramsbury, where he had been since the day they returned from Chadlington, and Acacia had, indeed, committed herself to Amesbury when the time came.
Since their return from Chadlington, Acacia had locked herself in her chamber and remained there, only emerging to travel to Amesbury on the designated day without a word to either sister. She wouldn’t speak to Dashiell, or Bentley, but she would speak to Aston. She blamed Lily for her troubles, and for Clayton’s troubles, and Lily refused to even acknowledge Acacia’s accusations, so her departure to Amesbury was met with no great fanfare. Lady Acacia Eleanor de Vaston left for Amesbury Abbey, and barely a word was said about it.
That had been four weeks ago and, with Acacia’s departure, the last of the uneasiness for the inhabitants of Ramsbury seemed to go with her. The mood, for the most part, was back to normal.
People were happy once again or, at the very least, at peace.
“M’lady!”
Someone was calling to Belladonna before she could step inside the keep and she turned to see one of the kitchen servants heading in her direction. Politely, she paused as the woman in dirty woolens and frazzled hair rushed up to her.
“M’lady,” the woman said. “We’ve got a side of pork we must cook because if we don’t, it’ll go bad. Can we prepare it for the men tonight?”
Belladonna shrugged. “Why ask me?” she said. “Did you ask Lady le Cairon?”
The old woman nodded her head. “We asked this morning, but she didn’t give us an answer,” she said. “If we don’t cook it, it will spoil.”
Belladonna lifted her shoulders again. “Then go ahead, I suppose,” she said. “Where is Lady le Cairon?”
“We’ve not seen her, m’lady.”
“She must be around, somewhere.”
The old servant simply nodded her head and rushed off again, heading back towards the kitchens. As Belladonna watched her go, she happened to catch a glimpse of Dashiell and Bentley on the battlements near the top level of the armory.
Instantly, her heart swelled at the sight. She paused a moment, shielding her eyes from the bright sunshine as she watched Dashiell move across the battlements in conversation with Bentley. He was in a tunic she’d made for him, dyed nearly the color of his auburn hair, and she thought he looked exceptionally handsome in it.
Belladonna had to smile when she noticed that he wasn’t wearing mail underneath it. Since the Chadlington celebration, he genuinely tried to dress to please her, wearing the tunics she would make for him but not hiding them with mail coats or hoods, or any other type of protection. He would, however, wear a belt with a sheath for his broadsword, or he’d have daggers or other weapons shoved into the belt, but he was genuinely trying to please his favored lady, which touched Belladonna immensely. He was starting to look a little more like a gentleman, or a court dandy as he called it, and a little less like a warrior armed to the teeth. It was the look of a man in love, and who was loved.
It was a wonderful transformation.
As Belladonna stood there watching him, he caught sight of her and lifted a big hand in greeting. She waved back, eagerly, and Bentley caught sight of her, too. He waved at her and she waved back. Truly, Belladonna liked Bentley a great deal. She always had. Now that Clayton was in the vault, he seemed happier because Lily was happier.
Oh, Belladonna knew they loved each other. They always had, and it was something that was established. But even though Clayton was in the vault, Lily and Bentley had maintained a completely proper relationship with one another as they did even when Clayton had been roaming free.
Nothing had changed on that account, at least as far as Belladonna could see, but the pair did seem more at ease around each other. They smiled more. But Belladonna thought it was a terrible pity they still couldn’t be together.
Tragic, even.
In fact, that was on her mind as she continued on into the keep, looking for a sister she hadn’t seen in a while. Preparations for the evening meal were well under way, something Lily was usually heavily involved in. Wandering to the upper floor where Lily’s chamber was, she knocked softly on the door.
“Lily?” she called.
No answer. Again, she knocked. “Lily?”
Then, she thought she heard a voice, so she opened the door into Lily’s resplendent chamber. She was greeted by the smell of rushes as she entered, but also the smell of something else – something rank. She could see her sister lying on her side on the bed and as she approached, she saw Lily vomit into a bowl.
Belladonna rushed to her sister’s side.
“Why did you not send for me?” she asked gently, noting that the other smell she’d sensed upon entering the chamber was the vomit. There was quite a bit in Lily’s bowl. “How long have you been like this?”
Lily wiped at her mouth with a cloth she had in her hand. “It does not matter,” she said. “It will pass.”
Belladonna frowned. “If you are ill, then I must send for a physic,” she said. “Was it something you ate?”
Lily put her hand on Belladonna to ease the woman. “Nay,” she muttered, rolling on to her back, exhausted. “It was nothing I ate, Bella.”
“Then what? Clearly, a sickness of some kind.”
“Nay, not a sickness. I… I have been trying to keep this from you, but I am afraid I cannot keep it a secret much longer.”
Belladonna was confused as well as concerned. “Secret?” she repeated. “What are you talking about? Let me go to the kitchens and bring you something to settle your stomach. Broth, mayhap? Or a bit of bread?”
Lily shook her head, but the mere mention of the food was enough to cause her to heave into her bowl again. There wasn’t anything in her stomach, so she mostly dry heaved. When she was finished, she lay pale and panting on her bed as Belladonna took the bowl from her and set it on the table next to the bed.
“Lily,” she said softly, putting her hand on the woman’s forehead. “Please let me get you something to…”
Lily cut her off. “Do not say it,” she begged. “Do not speak of food. Not now. Mayhap, I will be stronger later.”
Belladonna was genuinely perplexed. “You needn’t worry about anything,” she said. “I will see to the meal tonight. You must rest if you are going to be well again.”
Lily grasped her hand, weakly. “It will take a long time for me to be well again, I think.”
“Why would you say that? How long will it take?”
“About seven months, I should think.”
Belladonna still wasn’t grasping what she was being told. “Seven months? Why seven months?”
With a sigh, Lily put Belladonna’s hand on her belly, making sure that her sister realized there was a nice, round bump there. When Belladonna stared at her sister’s belly, starting to realize what she meant, Lily spoke softly.
“That is when my child will be born,” she said quietly. “I am with child, Bella. It is the child causing the sickness.”
The news hit Belladonna hard and her hand flew to her mouth, stifling the gasp. “Oh… Lily!” she whispered through splayed fingers. “But… but you said the pessaries from the apothecary would prevent such a thing!”
Lily’s hand found her way onto her belly, caressing it lovingly. “This is not Clayton’s child,” she whispered. “It is Bent’s.”
Belladonna’s mouth popped open, her eyes widening in shock. “Bentley is the father?”
Lily nodded. Then, the tears began to come. “I do not care what you think of me,” she wept. “Acacia was right. She was right when she said I have always loved Bentley and this child was conceived in love, Bella. Had Clayton not come along, I would be married to Bentley now and this would be our first child, and I would be rejoicing. I would be so happy that it would put all other happiness to shame.”
She was starting to weep, which caused Belladonna to tear up. It was such a terrible, tragic situation that she simply couldn’t help it. She gripped her sister’s hands tightly.
“I know you love him,” she said. “I have always known. But you and he… you hardly look at one another, so I never knew that… oh, Lily, this is truly his baby?”
Lily nodded as tears streamed down her temples. “I do not know what to do,” she said. “Clayton will know it is not his.”
Belladonna’s brow furrowed. “But why? He is your husband and…”
Lilly interrupted her. “Bella, I have not lain with my husband since before he left for the battle campaign to the north,” she said. “Not since last autumn, when he forced himself upon me. When he returned home two months ago, I managed to avoid him until Dash put him in the vault. Therefore, he will know this child is not his.”
Belladonna was shocked to the bone at the dilemma, horrified for her sister and the woman’s reputation, but more horrified at Clayton’s reaction. The man was in the vault but, at the moment, that didn’t much matter. He would be a husband shamed, a future duke whose wife was to bear a child that was not his.
The implications were staggering.
What should have been a joyful time in life for Lily and Bentley could turn into something dark and horrible. Belladonna felt a good deal of panic on her sister’s behalf.
“You must not worry,” she said, trying to reassure the woman. “Mayhap you can go away to have the child. Mayhap you can go to a town where no one knows you and have the child there. No one has to know, Lily. Surely there is a way.”
Lily was struggling to still her tears. This was a secret she’d kept since she realized she was expecting a few weeks ago, when her stomach would lurch at odd times of the day, with or without a prompting of food. Some days she was fine and some days, like today, she was ill. But the one thing she had felt constantly was fear.
She was positively terrified.
“Mayhap there is a way,” she said, wiping at her eyes. “I thought that I might take a small home by the sea and wait until the child was born. I could simply say that I was ill and needed to go away. You would support me in this, of course.”
Belladonna nodded eagerly, stroking her sister’s dark head. “Of course,” she agreed. “Anything you wish. But… have you told Bent?”
Lily shook her head sadly. “I do not wish for him to feel this burden. It is mine and mine alone.”
Belladonna squeezed her hands. “You are so wrong,” she insisted softly. “You know that Bent loves you. This is his child, Lily. You must tell him.”
Torn, Lily simply lifted her shoulders, unable to do more than that. She knew her sister was right, but she wasn’t sure she could bring herself to agree. She knew Bentley was an honorable man and he would want to do the honorable thing, but given that he couldn’t marry her, it would tear his noble heart to shreds.
It was a terrible situation all around.
As the sisters sat there and held hands, pondering the uncertain and frightening future for Lily and her baby, they could hear the sentries at the gatehouse announcing visitors. Belladonna turned towards the lancet window that faced over the bailey, hearing the commotion.
“I did not know we were expecting any visitors,” she said. “Did you?”
Lily sighed heavily and tried to rise. “I did not,” she said. “I must see who has come.”
Belladonna pushed her down onto the bed. “Nay,” she said firmly. “I will see who has come. I will return to you when I know, I swear it.”
Lily still wasn’t feeling very well and she wasn’t sure she could even make it down to the bailey, so she had to let her sister take charge. Defeated, she simply lay there.
“Return to me quickly,” she said.
Belladonna kissed her hands and stood up. “I will.”
Lily lay there, listening to Belladonna’s footfalls fade away. She wasn’t thinking about the visitors or the fact that she was unable to perform her chatelaine duties. Her mind was centered on the child in her belly and the complications that it brought. They were the same thoughts she’d been having since she realized she was with child, the same chaotic fears she had been entertaining.
What will happen when Clayton finds out?
What will happen to me?
God, what will happen to my child?
In a time of her life that should have been her happiest, all she could feel was devastation.
Dashiell had been standing on the battlements when the incoming party had been sighted.
He had men stationed at the gatehouse with very fast horses, just for an occasion such as this. Ramsbury was surrounded by open plain for the most part, so their line of sight on the road leading to the castle was about a mile. At that distance, they couldn’t make out any details, so Dashiell had riders stationed at the gatehouse to be the eyes for the sentries.
Two riders took off, racing down the road and heading for the incoming party. Dashiell and Bentley watched curiously for at least one of the riders to return with information, which happened very quickly. As the rider approaching, flying at full speed, he came near the gatehouse, shouting the identity of the approaching party.
De Nerra… Canterbury…
Now, Dashiell and Bentley made haste down to the gatehouse to greet their incoming guests. Truth be told, Dashiell was surprised to see de Nerra, but it wasn’t completely unexpected.
In the week following the return from Chadlington, Dashiell had sent de Nerra a missive about Clayton. He explained that the man had tried to kill the duke by releasing him on the mass competition field and, based on that action – which was the last in a long line of similar actions – he’d arrested Clayton and the man was currently being held in the Ramsbury vault.
At this point in time, what Dashiell did was perfectly justifiable. Clayton had made one too many attempts to assume the dukedom and Dashiell had every right to lock the man up to protect the duke. The complications would come when the Edward passed away and Clayton would assume the title. Dashiell needed de Nerra’s wisdom on the matter, but he’d expected a missive from the man and certainly not a visit. More surprising still was that the banners of the Archbishop of Canterbury were flying with him. So clearly, this was a very touchy incident, enough to warrant a visit from Stephen Langton himself.
Knowing that the Itinerant Justice of Hampshire and the Archbishop of Canterbury were about to make an appearance, Dashiell sent his men into a frenzy cleaning up and making room in the bailey of Ramsbury for what would be a considerable entourage. He also sent men rushing into the keep to inform Lady le Cairon that she would need to prepare for guests.
Everyone at Ramsbury was moving with a purpose as the entourage came closer, moving rather slowly up the road to Ramsbury as clouds began to gather overhead. It had been a lovely day, with hardly a cloud in the sky. But this time of year, the weather could be unpredictable, and from that black clouds forming overhead, Dashiell knew they were in for a storm.
He hoped it wasn’t indicative of the message de Nerra and Canterbury bore.
As Dashiell and Bentley stood in the gatehouse, soon joined by Aston, Belladonna emerged from the keep and made her way across the bailey as the wind began to pick up. The sky continued to darken as she headed for Dashiell and the open portcullis of the gatehouse.
The soldiers and servants seemed quite busy as she closed the gap. In fact, she had to move out of the way as one soldier ran past her and almost plowed into her. By the time she reached Dashiell and his knights, she was looking curiously at the busy bailey.
“God’s Bones,” she said. “What on earth is happening that men should be running around in such a frenzy?”
Dashiell smiled at her. “We have important visitors,” he told her. Gavin de Nerra is riding with the Archbishop of Canterbury.”
Belladonna looked at him in surprise. “The archbishop is here?” she asked. “I… I did not know you had asked him to come here, Dash.”
He shook his head. “I did not,” he replied. “All I have done is send word to de Nerra about Clayton’s incarceration. I did not expect him to come to Ramsbury, but he has, and he is evidently bringing Stephen Langton with him.”
Belladonna peered through the gatehouse, down the road leading to the castle that was relatively straight. She could see the party approaching in the distance, flying colorful banners.
“Then the archbishop is not here to discuss our betrothal?” she asked.
Dashiell took her by the elbow and turned her around for the keep. “I am sure that will be discussed,” he said. “But my suspicion is that they are here because of what happened with Clayton. But do not fret; I am sure our betrothal will be discussed also. Therefore, I need you to return to the keep and tell Lady le Cairon that we are expecting important guests. She will need to make all due preparations for the evening meal and also for their lodging.”
Belladonna thought of her ill sister, lying in bed and hardly able to move. “I will do it,” she said quickly. “Lily is… ill. She is not feeling well, so I will attend to her duties.”
Bentley, who wasn’t standing too far away, heard her.
“Lady le Cairon is ill?” he said. “What is the trouble?”
Belladonna looked at the man, unable to tell him the truth. But she was nearly bursting with her concerns and fears, so much so that it must have been in her expression. Dashiell saw it, although Bentley did not.
“Her stomach,” she said after a moment. “It is nothing. She will be fine.”
With that, she turned away and began moving quickly towards the keep. But a word from Dashiell brought her to a halt.
“My lady?” he called after her. “Bella? Wait a moment.”
Belladonna came to a halt, turning to look at the man and trying to make it seem like she wasn’t trying to hide something. He had a way of looking at her that seemed to bore into her very soul.
“What is it, Dash?” she asked as he came near. “I have much to attend to and very little time to do it.”
“Since when do you not have time for me?” he asked softly.
Her shoulders slumped as she eased her stance. “I am sorry,” she said. “I did not mean it the way it sounded. Of course I have time for you, always.”
He smiled at her. “That is good to know,” he said. “But something changed in your face when you mentioned Lily. Is her illness serious?”
Belladonna found that to be a ridiculous question, all things considered. But she was also very upset over it, a burden she didn’t want to assume all on her own. Perhaps, if she shared it with Dashiell, he could think of something. Perhaps, he could advise Lily on what she should do, because he was a very wise man. God only knew, Lily needed help.
With that in mind, she lowered her voice.
“Nay, it is not serious,” she said, her expression bordering on miserable. “But… Dash, she told me something today that frightens me to death. I am terrified for my sister.”
His brow furrowed. “What is it, lamb?”
“I will tell you, but you must swear to me that you will not say a word to anyone.”
He was growing concerned. “I swear. What is it?”
Belladonna reached out, putting her hand on his arm and Dashiell clasped a big hand over it.
“Lily is with child,” she whispered.
“I see,” he said quietly, failing to see why she was frightened. “She is positive?”
Belladonna nodded, tears stinging her eyes. “She is.”
He paused. “This cannot be terrible news, lamb,” he said. “The birth of an heir is cause for celebration.”
She blinked, tears spattering on her eyelashes. “You do not understand,” she whispered. “The child is not Clayton’s – it is Bentley’s.”
Dashiell didn’t outwardly react but, inside, he was stunned. As was usual with him, the worse the crisis, the calmer he became. He could see that Belladonna was full of brimming emotion and he didn’t want to break the dam. Therefore, he refused to give her any hint of what he was feeling. Instead, he squeezed her fingers.
“And she is certain of this?”
Belladonna nodded, wiping at her eyes. “She says that she and Clayton have not… she has not been with him since last autumn, before you left on battle campaign,” she said. “She says the child is due in seven months, so Clayton will know the child is not his. I am so frightened for her, Dash.”
Now, Dashiell could understand why. Lily wasn’t his sister and, truth be told, he was deeply concerned for her as well.
“Does Bentley know?”
Belladonna shook her head. “She does not want to tell him. She says this is her burden alone.”
He grunted. “That is hardly true,” he said. “If a child has been created, clearly, two people were involved.”
“I know,” she said, sadly. “Whatever shall she do, Dash? She needs help.”
He lifted an eyebrow at the enormity of that understatement. “She does, indeed,” he said, lifting her hand to kiss it because she was so upset. “But I am not sure I am the one to come up with a solution. This is Lily and Bentley’s problem, not mine.”
Belladonna’s eyes filled with tears. “Please, Dash,” she said. “You are so wise. Clayton will know the child is not his and surely he will tell everyone. All of England will know that my sister conceived a child by a man who was not her husband. Please… please think of something. Please help.”
It really wasn’t his problem, as he said, but he could hardly deny her. She was turning to him for help and he wouldn’t disappoint her.
“As you wish,” he said, patting her hand again. “You must let me think on it. But you must not tell anyone else, do you hear? You are right to be afraid because this is a serious problem. Where is Lily now?”
“In her bed. She was vomiting when I left her.”
Dashiell sighed. The problem with pregnancy was that, at some point, people were going to know. Lily wouldn’t be able to hide her condition forever.
“Then go about your tasks, the ones you were going to do in her stead,” he told her. “Everything will be all right, lamb. We will greet the archbishop and Lord Gavin, and we will deal with our immediate problems before we deal with Lily. For now, she is safe. No one will know she is with child because I just saw the woman this morning and would have never guessed it, so her problem is not immediate. We must deal with one thing at a time.”
“Then you will think of something?”
He hesitated. “I will,” he said, “but you must convince Lily to tell Bentley. If she does not tell him, I will. It is not fair to him to keep this from him.”
Belladonna nodded. Knowing she had his help on such a terrible subject gave her great comfort. She was feeling better already.
“I will tell her,” she said. “She will listen to me.”
He winked at her as he dropped her hand. “Go, now,” he told her. “You have duties to attend to. I will bring Lord Gavin and the archbishop into your father’s solar, so please provide them with refreshment.”
Belladonna had many things to complete, which was good. It kept her mind off Lily’s problems, at least for the moment. Dashiell said he would think of something and she trusted that he would.
Smiling gratefully at the man, she turned for the keep, running through the order of business she needed to accomplish. First to the kitchens to tell the cook to expect guests, and second to have refreshments brought to her father’s solar. But just as she stepped into the keep, the clouds let loose and it began to rain.
In hindsight, Belladonna should have taken it for a sign of things to come…
Stormy.