Chapter Fifteen

Knox

Every time I saw his face, I saw hers.

It was unfortunate.

I often wondered what he thought when he saw my face. Did he see the friendship that used to exist in the empty unspoken space between us? Or just death?

My fries tasted like sand in my mouth.

The burger, I ended up tossing to Finn, who couldn’t even stomach it enough to take one bite.

We were all quiet.

The three of us.

And for the first time in years, we had a free night.

Which meant we had nothing but our thoughts and fuck-ups to keep us company.

“Do you think he’ll ever get over it?” Finn asked, throwing a basketball in the air every few seconds and catching it, only to throw it again.

Leo shifted in his chair; it creaked under his weight as he looked to me then back at the cheap tan carpet. “If we’re not over it, he sure as shit isn’t over it.”

I sighed. “We should go to a party or something.”

Both guys looked at me as if I’d just grown a third nipple.

“Knox Tate?” Leo said with a gasp. “Party? You don’t party. You sulk. Sure you don’t have a fever?”

“Very funny.” I rolled my eyes. “I don’t know, we have a free night tonight. It just seems—”

“Better than sitting here thinking thoughts,” Finn finished for me.

We all stared at each other then jumped to our feet and grabbed all of our shit. Sometimes memories were the worst company you could have, especially when paired with mistakes you couldn’t take back.

I was the last to leave the room. I’d taken two steps toward her door when Finn pulled me back.

“Maybe it’s for the best. Maybe there’s a reason she’s his roommate…”

“Yeah,” I croaked, “maybe.”

“I miss it too,” Finn said in a low voice. “We all do.”

“Right.” Anger punched me in the gut first, followed by regret as I slammed the door behind me and looked straight ahead. I either needed to get drunk, or laid, or both.

And what better place to do that than Greek Row?

We were there in minutes.

Our choice of party.

“Four parties, three look ready to be shut down already, which is a bit early if you ask me.” Leo shrugged. “But…” He pointed to our old frat from freshman year. “…at least we know they don’t put shit in their beer.”

“Cheers to that.” We bumped fists then the three of us walked up to the house and in the front door.

It was one thing I would never get tired of.

The sheer power behind what we did.

The way that the other guys obviously wished they were us every pathetic day of their lives, and the way the woman sucked their lips the minute they saw us smile in their direction.

If royalty existed on campus…

We were it.

To the guys, we were gods; to the women, unobtainable. It worked well in our favor and worked really well for Wingman, Inc.

“YES!” Eli, the house president, shouted over the music. “Our prodigals are home!”

Cheers surrounded us as we moved through the crowd. Girls tried to grab; guys glared at their girlfriends for fanning themselves. All in all, it was turning out to be a great night.

I made my way toward the keg and grabbed a cup.

Leo and Finn followed, though they looked like they’d both just been groped; Leo’s button-down shirt was legit missing its top three buttons, and the top button of Finn’s jeans was undone.

“I forget how crazy girls get.” Leo wiped some lipstick from his neck. “It’s like a free-for-all buffet whenever we go out.”

“For them,” Finn added as he buttoned his jeans back together.

I eyed the room over the rim of my cup and surveyed all the dancing bodies ripe with sweat, right along with the smell of alcohol, Axe Body Spray, bad choices, and fake tans. My mind buzzed from the taste of the alcohol.

I shouldn’t have taken a sip.

Because taste, smell… they always brought me back.

Back to the beginning.

Back to the end.

 

“What’s your name?” I handed the beautiful girl a drink. She had autumn-colored hair and an easy, wide smile that was impossible not to return.

“Ah, I don’t share such private information.” She winked, took a sip, scrunched up her nose, and leaned in. “Got anything better?”

“In my room,” I tried.

She burst out laughing. “That work on all the drunk freshman girls?”

“It would sure as hell work on a drunk freshman guy.” I pointed at myself then held out my hand. “Knox Tate, and you are?”

“Sophie.” She chewed her lower lip. “Sophie Jackson.”

“I like it.” I grinned, and I really did. I liked her. She had this magnetism about her that made me want to get closer, made me want to touch, taste, smell.

She held up her plastic cup and tapped it against mine. “I guess I’ll see you around Knox Tate.”

“You’re leaving me already?” I put a hand to my chest and faked being heartbroken.

She threw her head back and laughed.

Both Finn and Leo joined me and raked their gazes up and down.

“Mmm… looks like you have enough people to keep you company.” She eyed them both.

“Keep us all company,” Leo piped up. “Trust me, we’re good for it.”

“Eh, I’m a one-guy kinda girl.”

Finn sighed. “Then I guess we’re out. Have fun with the sexy one.”

They left us.

The music slowed. “One dance.” Was I begging?

She downed the rest of the beer. “One dance.”

We linked hands and started swaying slowly. I could taste the beer on her breath, smell the sweet sweat on her skin as her body moved against mine, our hands intertwined. I leaned in and kissed her neck, and she let me. I was so shocked, I did it again to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating.

Then she was wrapping her arms around my neck.

And as I looked into her crystal blue eyes, I knew. I would be gone for this girl, and I would love every fucking minute of it.

“Sophie Jackson.” I whispered her name, measured it across my tongue, kept it in my soul. “I think I just fell in love.”

She didn’t laugh.

She just held on to me tighter as if it was true.

And my heart beat a little bit faster.

And I fell a little bit harder.

 

“Hey.” Finn knocked me on the head. “You okay? You look lost.”

I shook my head a bit and grabbed more beer. “Yeah, yeah. Hey, let’s get shit-faced.”

He eyed me tentatively. “You don’t get shit-faced — Correction, we don’t get shit-faced. Last time, poor Leo almost got pregnant.”

Leo flipped us both off.

I joined in their laughter because I had to, because if I didn’t, I was afraid I would do the opposite.

I gulped down another beer, well on my way to being buzzed, when I scanned the crowd again and saw Shawn walk in with one of her teammates, Alexa. It was my business to know everyone.

The hell was she doing here?

I’d told her to go to bed!

I slammed the cup down on the table and marched over to her. “You don’t belong here.”

Her mouth dropped open. “I’m sorry, what?”

Alexa’s eyes widened as if one of us was about to throw down.

“You—” I pointed to the door. “—need to leave.”

“What crawled up your studious ass and died?” Shawn snorted at me. “I’m here because my friend invited me. I was perfectly happy in my sweats, getting ready for bed when she texted.”

And just like that, I was checking out her leather skirt and short white crop top that made me want to devour her whole and come back for seconds, thirds, fourths— There was no end to the tasting I would do.

“You’re dressed… inappropriately.” Yeah, that’s all I had. Maybe I was already drunk, because it came out almost like a stutter, which I’d never done in my entire life, not even when I was getting laid as a freshman in high school by the senior homecoming queen.

Alexa looked between the two of us, snapped her gum, and patted Shawn on the shoulder. “I’ll just go get us some beer. You wait here.”

Shawn crossed her arms in a protective stance.

Shit, how tall are those heels? And why the hell am I sweating?

“Are you drunk?” she asked.

“Not yet.” Not enough, never enough.

“Oh good, so you have plans for public drunkenness. Great.” She grinned. “Well, try not to puke in your backpack before the tutoring session tomorrow afternoon.”

I glared. “I can hold my alcohol, but thanks.”

She just waved me off and walked by like I wasn’t fucking Knox Tate.

Again.

Leo and Finn both flashed me dumb-ass grins while students standing around us looked ready to tweet every single individual on their profile with the hashtag #royallybitchslapped.

“Twice.” Leo came up behind me. “That’s twice she’s blown you off.”

“I can count. Thanks, though.” I was barely keeping myself in control when I noticed Finn talking to Shawn across the room. She was laughing as if he was the funniest idiot on the planet, and when she stopped laughing, she glanced up and flipped me off.

“Oh shit,” Leo said under his breath. “He’s bringing his A-game, isn’t he?”

I glared. “Let him have her.”

“How noble of you.” Leo grinned. “One would think you’re actually… jealous.”

“I don’t get jealous,” I muttered, sucking air from an empty cup only to find out I needed a refill.

“Says the guy drinking cheap beer like it’s water.” Leo gave me a new cup.

I took it and watched them, staring like a man insane. What the hell was it about her?

Nothing. She was beautiful.

But I saw beautiful on a daily basis.

Maybe it was her attitude.

The way she seemed so hell-bent on not falling for it, falling for us; the way she judged me when any other girl would bend over backward just for a taste of my mouth.

Finn and Shawn started dancing, but soon she bowed out and left Alexa with him. Finn didn’t seem to mind though, as he grabbed Alexa by the waist and pulled her close. The girl seemed ready to combust with excitement. And my eyes, my eyes roamed until they landed on Shawn.

She was in line for the bathroom.

Yeah, good luck with that.

I marched over to her, grabbed her hand, and drug her through the lines of people, despite her angry protests, until we were near the stairs. Then we ducked under the caution tape, and I knocked on the upstairs bathroom door, shoved her in, and guarded it like a dog.

She was in there all of two minutes.

Then the door opened. Her eyes narrowed in on me. “You need to pick.”

“Pick?”

“Yeah, I don’t do this whole hot-cold thing. It’s not sexy on TV. It’s not sexy now. I don’t like assholes, and I don’t like guys who are so inwardly confused that they lash out at other people. So, I’m letting you choose. Are you going to be an asshole or a friend?”

“I don’t…” I was too surprised to form words. Instead, I burst out laughing. Yeah, the beer was starting to hit. “I don’t have friends who are girls.”

“Maybe you should try. Might be good for you.” She winked. “Plus, I’m a pretty good friend. Just ask Slater.”

“Let’s leave your roommate out of this.”

“Ah, because you hate each other?”

I looked away. “Something like that.”

“Uh-huh. All right, I’m waiting then. What will it be?”

I grinned. “Friends means I can’t kiss you.”

“Exactly.” She looked triumphant.

“Hmm…” I tapped my chin then moved closer and trapped her against the wall, my hands on either side of her. I pressed in. “…let me think about it for ten seconds.”

“Ten seconds, huh?” She grinned wide. “All right, one—”

I swept down, tasting the two on her lips, followed by the three, four, five. I tasted each number as if she was speaking it against me, like they were a drug. I craved more. I sucked on her tongue and pressed mine against hers in an act of dominance then I ran my hands up and down her ribs.

“Nine.”

I groaned as she melted under my touch.

Fuck. “Ten.”

“Friends,” I said breathlessly. “I think that will work out just great, don’t you?”

Her swollen lips parted as she dumbly nodded her head and said in a much more confident voice than I thought she’d have, “Yeah, sure, sounds great. Friends.”

“Super.” I licked my lips, still tasting her there, and closed my eyes so she wouldn’t see the truth in my eyes, or my reaction. Hell, anyone could see my reaction if they just looked down; even tight jeans couldn’t hold me back.

Her cheeks went bright pink before she ducked under my arm.

I fell in to step beside her. “So, friend, should we get a drink?”

She looped her arm in mine. “Only if it’s not cheap beer.”

It was so familiar. The situation the same.

The girl different.

The hair on the back of my arms stood on end when I looked toward the door and saw Slater’s look of disgust before he turned on his heel and walked away.

Hell.

It was different.

It had to be.

Because nobody could survive that twice.

Especially not a guy like me.

“Yeah…” I shook off the bad feeling. “…let’s go into the kitchen.”

I wrapped an arm protectively around her while girls around me pouted as if they’d just lost, which in a way they had.

Guys checked her out even more.

And I was suddenly thankful that I had Leo and Finn to surround us, to encircle and protect her when I couldn’t.

Because I knew something she didn’t.

Being my friend?

It wasn’t good for her.

It was bad.

But I couldn’t stay away.

So, I would take what I could get.

“Shower Girl!” Leo shouted and pulled her in for a hug. “How’s my second most favorite person on the planet?”

“Thirsty.” She winked.

“Atta girl! Don’t worry, you’ve got us watching out for you. We’ll keep you safe.”

The sentence hung between the three of us like a fucking curse because we all knew, when it had really counted…

We’d failed.