My sister, Bree, has been binging on any and everything she can find to eat. I get it. But at the same time, I don’t want her sitting in her room, feeling bad. So, when I enter our childhood home and find her five slices into an extra-large cheese pizza, I drag her outside to take a walk. It’s cold out so we don’t walk too long but she does need to get some air. She says Will has been trying to call her, trying to patch things up. He even said that he’d go to marriage counseling.

“Are you gonna do it?” I ask.

“I don’t know. I don’t know anything anymore. He was my solid ground and now I’m free floating into crap. Don’t know. Don’t care. All that matters is Lily.”

“Where is she this weekend?”

“She’s at Will’s mom’s house. She needed to spend time with daddy. I didn’t want to get in the way of that.”

“That’s good, Bree. Some women play the kids against their spouse. I’m glad you’re not doing that.”’

“No but if he so much as winks at a woman while he’s out with my baby, I will castrate him with a dull butter knife.”

Wow…

We enter our childhood home and take off our coats. It doesn’t matter how old I am, I still love coming home, it always feels safe for me. Mom has decorated the house in warm colors and although she can overdo it with the knickknacks, her home is really lovely. Normally the house is neat but now that Bree is staying here, it’s undergone a sight change. There are pizza boxes, candy wrappers, and a box of melted chocolate ice cream spread out on the coffee table. I can look at the table and know what Bree has eaten for the last few days. She’s basically a frat boy now.

“How are things with you and Wyatt?” she asks.

“I think things are good but he’s on edge because they haven’t been able to find the members of the gang that gave the orders to destroy the center. Until he finds them, he’s always going to be on high alert.”

“Did you guys screw yet?”

“Bree!”

“What?! Oh come on, life’s too short not to get good dick. Trust me. Do you know how much time I spent pretending to like my sex life with Will? Wait, do you know how much time I spent pretending to have a sex life?” she says as she starts to laugh.

“It couldn’t have been that bad.”

“I’ve gotten more excited pumping gas than I have with Will.”

“Ouch.”

“I was such an idiot. I lived on the hope that he’d excite me in bed one day. But that asshole couldn’t find his way out of a Wal-Mart parking lot, let alone my G-spot.”

“But you stayed because you love him and love beats sex.”

“Oh grow up! If you love someone, you figure a way to make them feel good. Yes, Will’s dick is the size of Tic-Tac, and yes, he never lasted longer than the length of a commercial break. But if he had put some effort into knowing me and what I liked, and what made me feel good, it could have saved us.

“Or maybe it was doomed from the start. What the hell do I know? Just tell me that you’re having some great, fantastic sex. The kind of sex that requires medical attention when it’s done. I need to know that someone out there is happy,” she says as she drapes herself on my lap. I can’t help but laugh at her.

“You don’t like Wyatt, remember?”

“That was before he kept me out of jail.”

“Yeah he’s good like that,” I tease her.

“ARGH!” She groans as she buries her head in my lap.

“Bree, it’s gonna be okay. You won’t always feel this lost, sweetie. I promise,” I say as I stroke her hair.

“You know what I need?”

“No more pizza!” I reply as I push the box away.

“No! I need a ‘revenge’ lay!”

“What?! No, that is not what you need.”

She stands up and I can see her eyes lighting up with ideas of how to get laid. This is so not good.

“Bree, you can’t just go out and sleep with another guy.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s the wrong thing to do.”

“You get to have an exciting life, why can’t I?”

“My life is not exciting at all.”

“Oh please! You confront gang members, you’re staying with a hot cop, and I know you gave him some.”

“I haven’t!” I reply. She narrows her eyes and places her hands on her hips.

“Okay, I gave him a little and he gave me a little. But we haven’t had sex yet.”

“I knew it! I knew you had to give up something! Well I’m sure he was happy with what you gave him but what was his performance like?” I don’t reply but apparently she doesn’t need words from me.

“OHMYGOD, that good huh?”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“You moaned and damn near arched your back.”

“I did not!”

“So, then tell me. How was it when he went down on you?”

This time I hear the moan but can’t stop it from escaping my mouth. ARGH!!! She bursts out laughing.

“And wait until you two have sex, I bet it’ll peel the paint off the walls. Well I want some damn paint peeled off my walls. And I’m getting it,” she says. She jumps up off the chair and runs to her room. “Stay right here, Winnie, I’m coming with you,” she says as she takes the steps two at a time.

“Coming with me where?” I ask.

“Back to Manhattan. Mama’s getting laid!”

***

Bree is not kidding about returning to the city with me. In fact, she’s so damn serious, she gets dressed in under ten minutes. That has never happened before. I call Jana and ask for advice about what to do with Bree. I know she needs to let off some steam but I don’t want her doing anything too crazy in the state that she’s in. Jana agrees to go out with us tonight. I’m glad she’ll be there because I could use the backup.

Bree wants to go shopping; apparently revenge sex demands a whole new outfit. I am prepared to go with her but at the last minute I get a call from Wyatt saying he needs me to come down to the station right away.

“Aw, does that mean tonight is cancelled?” Bree asks, pouting like a little girl.

“No, you wanna go out, we’ll go. But I need to see what’s going on at the station first. In the meantime, why don’t you call some of your friends and see if they can go shopping with you?”

“No, they are all moms. Nice. Respectable. Moms. I want to shop with someone who thinks panties are optional.”

“Seriously, that’s the criteria?”

“Right now, yes!”

God help me.

“Okay, I will ask Jana to go with you; she wears underwear but I think she’ll do,” I reply as I call my best friend. She comes to pick up Bree, and I take a Lyft and head for the police station. When I arrive, Wyatt greets me and takes me into an office around the corner. He’s so different when he’s working. He’s so serious and stern. His voice, his movements, and his facial expression are all stone and would scare the shit out of me if I didn’t know him.

“What’s going on?” I ask.

“We have a witness, someone who saw what happened at the center that night and can identify the gang members involved.”

“Really? That’s great!” I reply. His lips twitch and his eyes narrow as they focus on me.

“Wyatt, what is it?”

“You’re not gonna like this…” he warns. He opens the door and signals to someone just outside to enter and join us. A little boy and his parents enter the room. I quickly go up to Luis.

“What are you doing here, sweetheart?” I ask. His parents tell us he hasn’t been acting like himself. He’s been jumpy and having nightmares. It took some doing but they finally got the story out of him. He was supposed to be in bed but he couldn’t sleep and so he snuck out of the house to go in front of the center and play on his skateboard. He saw the car pull up and the guys get out. He hid while they tore the place apart.

“Oh Luis, sweetie, why didn’t you tell anyone?” I ask.

“He thought he’d get in trouble for being outside, also knowing what kind of people we’re dealing with, I’m not surprise our boy didn’t say anything,” his foster mom says with fear in her voice.

“We brought Luis here because it’s the right thing to do, but that’s it, we can’t let our son be involved in any of this,” his father says.

“No, of course not!” I reply.

“But I want to help. I’m not scared anymore. I can be tough,” he pleads with me.

“I know you can, Luis, but we will figure this out another way, okay?” I reply.

“I’m not afraid. I can be brave like Mr. Hunter said in the class when he came to the center. He said you have to do what’s right even when you’re afraid. I didn’t do it before but I’m ready now,” Luis says.

Aw, this kid is breaking my heart.

I don’t get a chance to reply because Decker enters the room at that moment with a stack of large black photo books. Decker greets me with a quick nod and places the books on the table for Luis to look through.

“Like we said, we don’t want him involved in this,” the father says as he places his hand over the books so that Luis doesn’t open them.

“This is just to confirm who we already know was involved. If you decide to stop here, we understand,” Decker says.

“So he’s just looking at some pictures, you’re not gonna force him to testify or anything?” his foster mother says.

“No! I promise Luis is not gonna do anything of the kind,” I assure them. Wyatt looks over at me and signals that he wants to see both Decker and me outside.

“Alright, Luis, we’ll be right back,” Decker says as we exit the room and walk out into the hallway.

“You can’t promise them that, Winter,” Wyatt says as soon as we are alone.

“There’s no way I’m gonna let anyone put Luis in danger,” I counter.

“I get not wanting anything to happen to him, I am on the same page. But he’s the only witness and we have no other leads,” Wyatt replies.

“Then find another lead, honey, because I won’t let Luis be involved in this in any way,” I swear.

“He might not have a choice. The Street Kings might already know about Luis and if that’s the case he’s already in danger,” Decker says.

“So you need to give him protection. But don’t drag him deeper. This is my kid,” I remind them.

“Babe, I get that you are looking out for him but putting him on the stand might be the best way to get rid of all the danger he’s around,” Wyatt says.

“No. There has to be another way,” I push.

“There isn’t another way. We’ve been at this for days now and I’m telling you, there’s no other way,” Wyatt says, pushing back.

“Well, that’s not exactly true…” Decker says, then hesitates. Wyatt glares at him and Decker raises his hand as if to surrender.

“Hey, what are you two not telling me?” I demand.

“It’s nothing babe,” he says, clearing holding something back.

“Yeah, he’s right. Let’s just get back in there and see if the kid can even make an ID,” Decker says.

“No! I’m not leaving this spot until you two tell me what’s going on. And I think you both know me well enough by now to know that I am not bluffing. Talk,” I demand as I fold my arms across my chest.

“We found out that they’ve been having your place watched. They really are pissed at you for denying them a new member. The word is out and it makes them look weak. So if they were to get you, it would show everyone just how serious they are. You’ve become very important to them.”

“They are watching my place? How long have they been doing that?” I ask as the hairs on the back of my neck stand up and a shiver passes though me. Shit. It’s so creepy to know that someone is watching you so they can hurt you. Wyatt steps closer to me and reads the sudden panic in my eyes.

“Hey, you know I won’t let anything happen to you,” he says firmly.

“Yeah, I know. It’s fine. What does this have to do with Luis?” I ask.

“Decker suggested that we give them what they are looking for,” Wyatt says, clearly unhappy with the thought.

“That’s perfect! We could use me as bait and you guys would be standing by. Then we could get them and Luis wouldn’t have to testify. Decker, that’s brilliant!”

“You. Me. Office. Now,” Wyatt demands as he pulls me away from Decker and into a small empty room across the hall.

“Wyatt, I—”

“No!”

“But—”

“No!”

“You would rather put a little kid in danger instead of putting me in danger?” I ask.

“I would rather neither of you face danger. If Luis can ID them, we will place him in protective custody, we’ll keep him and his family safe.”

“Yes, and you’ll do the same for me.”

“Him testifying in court, in front of a judge, security, and half the police department, is different than you being used as bait.”

“Wyatt, I am the reason this all happened. I need to do this. I can’t keep Carlos away from these guys forever. This is the only chance we have to get them. Let me do this.”

“No. No. No.”

“You are not the only one who wants to help. Just because I don’t have a badge doesn’t mean I can’t be useful.”

Wyatt rakes his hands through his hair as his jaw tightens. “I can’t put you in danger. Please try and get that,” he pleads.

“I won’t be in any danger.”

“Oh really? You have that much faith this plan?” he demands.

“No, I have that much faith in you…”