Chapter Fifteen

Stevie’s white hatchback Corsica barely pulled up to the curb before I jumped in it, causing her eyebrows to crinkle.

“Drive. Now.” I pointed in front of me.

She eyed me but did as I asked. “What’s wrong, Whiskey? You look like it was your cat I ran over on the way here. Oh shit, that wasn’t your cat, right? A brown fuzzy thing… Actually, never mind, pretty sure it was a squirrel. Or maybe a mongoose. Do those exist around here?”

A brief snort vibrated out of my nose; she was only trying to make me laugh.

I hoped.

“Fuck.” I pinched the bridge of my nose. “Why does the drinking age have to be twenty-one here?”

“What happened?” She turned the car back down Main Street. “By reasonable deduction and common sense, I’m figuring your car is part of this story, since I picked you up at a garage. See?” She tapped her head. “Don’t let people tell you college is a waste of money. I’m so smart I should be a freaking detective.”

I tilted my head back into the headrest.

“Uh-oh. This is serious.”

“My car overheated, and I had to call the garage to get towed. Well, guess who works there.”

“Hunter.” She didn’t say it like a question.

“You knew?” I exclaimed.

“Yeah. You told me not to talk about him.” She cringed. “I’m guessing he picked you up. That had to be awkward.”

“Not as awkward as when Krista came in with Cody.”

“Ouch.” Stevie sucked in, giving me a quick pained look.

“Did you know they were together?”

Stevie nodded. “I’m sorry. I heard something like that.”

“So you knew about the baby?”

Turning the car into a strip mall parking lot, it came to a skidding stop. “What? Baby?” She whipped to me as soon as the car came to a shuttering stop.

“Krista.” Tears stung the back of my lids, my hands twisting in my lap. “She’s pregnant…” My voice teetered off at the end. “She’s having his baby, Stevie.”

The silence was so palpable, I finally turned my head to look at Stevie. She sat there with her mouth and eyes wide open.

“What?” She spoke slowly. “No. Fucking. Way.”

“Why should it be a surprise?” I lifted my shoulders, feeling them collapse back down. “They’re happy together. They were always meant to be in the end.”

“No. They. Weren’t!” Stevie yelled, almost like she was mad at me. “No. No! You two are fuckin’ perfect for each other… not that wench. And meant to be? They are freakin’ twenty years old! I don’t even know what wine I’m meant to drink tonight. That bitch got herself knocked up on purpose, I’ll bet.”

“Stevie…” I shot her a look. “Don’t. Krista’s done nothing wrong. I left. I saw this coming… and it happened.”

“She’s done nothing wrong?” Stevie’s sputtered. “You’re the one who gets brother fucker on your locker when she is the one actually doing it.” Stevie gripped the steering wheel. “Screwing Colton behind your back for who knows how long and seamlessly switching over to Hunter. Two babies with twin brothers. That’s fucked up.”

“I should be the last one to judge her for that.” Fanning my hand over my face, the heat seeping through the window. “I dated Colton because he was shiny and happy.” I stared off into the distance. “But later Hunter clawed under my skin and claimed me without even my noticing until it was far too late.”

“Shit.” She exhaled heavily. “You’re still in love with him.”

“No.” I shook my head. “I loved him at one time. I won’t deny it, but I’ve moved on. I fell in love with Luca.”

“You can tell that cute little story all you want, even to yourself, and maybe some people would believe you. Not me, Whiskey. You can’t bullshit a bullshitter.”

A crack cut down my ribs, one dry sob breaking free. “It doesn’t matter.” I shrugged. “He’s having a baby… and nothing in the world will break him away from Krista. Look how he is with Cody, and this really is his child growing inside her.” Saying the last line out loud made my chest feel like it sank to the bottom of the ocean, the weight of the sea crushing it.

“Good thing you called me.” She grabbed her bag, opening the door.

“Where are you going?”

She flicked her chin at the sign a few stores down: “Liquor and More.”

“Stay here, I’ll be right back.” She hopped out of the car, jogging to the entrance. Only a few days ago I could go into places like that, now I couldn’t. It was an adjustment I didn’t like. My adult card had been stripped, telling me I was back to being a child in America’s eyes, though old enough to purchase a weapon.

Staring at my phone, I scrolled through my messages, landing on Luca’s name. I felt almost desperate to feel loved, to know someone cared about me. To run back to his open arms and leave all this behind like a bad dream. My finger hovered over the dial button.

Jayme, that’s not fair. You’re only calling him because you’re lonely and hurt. But I almost didn’t care. I needed to hear his voice.

Only the sound of the door opening as Stevie got back in the car with a grocery bag stopped me from hitting the button.

“What’d you get?”

“Everything for a broken heart.” She placed the bag in the backseat. “We’ll drop my mom’s car off and walk to the lake from my house.”

“The lake?” I scoffed. “Yeah, that’s a perfect place for me to not remember Hunter.”

“There’s no avoiding that.” She reversed the car and pulled out of the lot. “Need to face it all head-on. Make the place no longer meaningful.” She tilted her head to me, waggling her eyebrows over dramatically. “Or remember it as the place you finally stopped the pretense and had sex with me.”

I sniggered, shaking my head. The girl could always make me smile. I knew she didn’t feel that way about me either. Not one little bit. Our friendship was everything. But it was the way she teased.

The bag was loaded with tequila and bourbon. “Wow, no cider or beers?”

“For something like this?” She lifted one eyebrow. “Fuck the chasers. This is hard-core shit.”

I couldn’t agree more. It was one level of pain to know Hunter and Krista were a couple, another to see them together, and about forty more to see her pregnant.

I wanted to swim in a lake of tequila.

 

 

Campfire smoke filled my nose as I tossed a pebble into the lake. The school year was almost over, and students about to graduate were spending the week building up for the big celebration on Saturday.

The stars and fires reflected in the lake tethered me to so many memories of this place. “Fuck him!” I tossed in another rock before falling back on the blanket. I was at that dangerous drunk level: sober enough to not forget my hurt and anger, but drunk enough to do something stupid about it.

In Italy I had learned to enjoy drinking, mostly wine, where I hadn’t before, but I still had a low tolerance for straight alcohol. And I hated feeling like shit the next day. While other kids my age were usually drinking themselves into a coma, partying like crazy at college, I already felt like an old lady. I had gone extreme in Europe, doing all that with gusto. Being in Italy was my gateway to fooling around and drinking all the time. By the time I started to work for the museum, I was already bored with doing that, though I couldn’t deny Sammie and I had a few weekends that were a blur. But now I felt that chapter of my life had closed. I wanted more than that. My wings had been opened, but this town was threatening to close them again.

“The plan is to keep you busy until you leave.” Stevie took a swig of bourbon from the bottle, not even flinching. “Which will save me from killing my mother and ending up in jail. A win-win for us all.”

“Busy? In this town?” I laid back, watching the sky spin overhead as the water lapped at my feet.

“Tomorrow night there’s another one of those scavenger hunts. It’s at the fairgrounds.”

“No.” I shook my head.

“Come on. Do you really think he’ll be there?” She rolled her eyes. “She probably locks him in a kennel every night, not letting him out of her sight.”

I choked on my shot, imagining Krista crating Hunter. She had sort of looked like she wanted to pee on him today, to claim him as hers.

“No.” I sighed. At twenty, Hunter’s life was already set. Two kids and a wife, working as a mechanic. When I put it that way, it didn’t sound so great.

“Good. ’Cause you might have to protect me.” Stevie groaned, standing up.

“Why?”

“Remember Pocahontas? She’s texted me twice already, begging me to come. She wants to see me. Hello? Move on, girl!” Stevie rolled her hair into a bun. “Told you, once they get a sample, they turn into addicts.” She stumbled a few feet. “I’ve got to pee.”

I smirked, watching her curve and meander toward the restrooms.

Addict. I could empathize with Pocahontas. I understood what it felt like to have someone under your skin. Don’t. Don’t think about him.

I picked up my phone, needing to distract myself, feeling the last shot of tequila warmed my neck, hazing my thoughts.

Stopping on a number, my thumb hovered over it again. “Fuck it.” I stabbed at the button, the phone ringing on the other end. I shouldn’t do this. So stupid.

It continued to ring, finally a groggy deep voice picked up. “Jayme?”

“I’m sorry, I know it’s late… or early… I don’t know.”

“It’s four-thirty in the morning.” I heard the rustling of sheets.

“I know. I shouldn’t have called. I’ll let you get back to sleep.”

“No, bellezza.” Luca cupped the phone closer to his mouth, sounding more awake. “I’ve missed your voice so much. You can call me anytime you want.”

My heart warmed hearing his pet name for me. He was such a good man, and hearing his voice made me realize how much I missed him.

He would have made you happy, Jayme.

“I’ve missed you, bellezza.”

“I miss you too.”

“Voglio fare l’amore con te.” I want to make love to you.

Craving that very thing, hoping his touch would block out another, my mouth spoke before I thought. “I wish you were here, so you could do exactly that.”

He sucked in. “Il mio amore.” My love. “Mi torturi.” You torture me.

I couldn’t speak, my brain and heart at war.

Brain: Don’t be an idiot. He is perfect. Girl, you let this one go? You are a fool.

Heart: Yes, it feels good to hear those words, but you love someone else.

Brain: Don’t trust that stupid organ. Has it led you right yet?

Heart: Okay. Fair enough.

“I love you, bellissimo. You have been in my thoughts and dreams since the moment you left. Your smell still covers the pillow.”

His admission was overwhelming, tugging at the back of my lids.

“I should go,” I whispered hoarsely, feeling tears fill my throat.

“Wait.” Luca’s voice rose. “Tell me you do not miss me. That you don’t love me.”

I breathed out, staring up at the stars.

“I miss you, Luca. And I do love you, but not the way…”

“No.” He cut me off. “That is all I need to know. Good night, my love.” The phone went dead.

I hung up, dropping onto my back with a sniveling groan. Stevie’s unstable footsteps returned through the sand.

“Rule one of the summer: Don’t ever let me be alone again. And never leave me with my cell.” I tapped my forehead with my fist.

“Uh-oh. Did someone drunk dial? Just please don’t tell me it was Hunter.”

“Luca.”

“Okay, that’s not so bad.” She plunked down next to me. “At least that one is thousands of miles away, and you don’t have to run into said mistake… or see it when you pick up your car.”

That would have been epically embarrassing. I only drunk dialed Luca because the person whose memories at this lake haunted me was no longer in my cell phone. My gaze landed on where we almost had sex in the back of his truck, before Savannah ruined everything. The exact spot where Hunter posed as Colton, and I fell head over heels for him.

Staying here was torture. The countdown to leave this town had begun. Just get through the summer, Jayme. Then I could officially move on with my life. No matter what, I had been accepted to Virginia Tech, although it was no longer where I wanted to go, if I ever did. Applying there had been for Dad and Colton. What I really wanted was to get into the program at Smithsonian. I hoped Colleen’s letter improved my chances a hair, but it was one of the hardest internships to get in the country. After all, it was the freakin’ Smithsonian. My chances were as good as a penguin learning to fly.

Deep down I knew it didn’t matter where I went. Hunter’s memories had followed me to Italy, and he’d probably continue to plague me when I left here.

I hoped someday I could find peace again. Find happiness like I felt when I was with him.