Chapter Twenty-Eight

I pulled my jeep into the parking lot as I stared at the numbers on the door, my blurry eyes burning from lack of sleep.

Sleep would not be a luxury, nor would my mind let me anyway. After returning Stevie’s car, Mom drove me home where I took a much-needed shower. Her endless questions made me want to jump out of the moving car on the ride back. I knew she was concerned, but my brain couldn’t sort through anymore of what had happened last night. What just happened this morning.

Hunter’s declaration ran on an endless loop in my head, all the memories I had of them together tainted in a different light. The guy at the party talking to Krista wasn’t Hunter. I knew it in my gut now.

It was not his baby…

They weren’t together.

The acute relief I felt from knowing that led me here. I had no doubt where my heart was. Where it always had been.

My knuckles rapped on the door. After several moments it swung open. No happy smile greeted me.

“Luca.” I twisted my hands. “I came to apologize for last night. For leaving you like that.” No matter what, I still cared about him. We had been close; he brought be back from the brink, let light into my darkened heart. I never wanted to hurt him.

He turned away, leaving the door open, heading back to the bed. I stepped in, the air conditioner softly humming in the corner. The drawers were all pulled open, his bag on the bed, clothes folded inside.

“You’re packing?” I came to the other side, watching him fold a shirt and stuffing it in the luggage. His return ticket wasn’t until next Friday. A week from now.

“As you see,” he clipped, strolling into the bathroom, collecting his items.

“Why?” My throat strangled around the dumb question.

He stopped, his brown eyes flicking to mine with a sadness. “You know why, bellezza.” His pet name for me came out soft and pained. “My eyes were finally opened last night.”

I tucked my hair behind my ear, staring at the updated cream comforter. A year ago this place was a relic stuck in the eighties with dark colors, cheap bedding, and heavy furniture, but now it had been renovated to a more modern, sleek look.

“You warned me from the beginning. I did not listen.” He crammed his toiletries in his bag. “I really hoped you loved me. That we had something. I wanted to marry you.” He swallowed, agony twitching his mouth. “You were everything to me. But last night I saw… The way I look at you…” Through his lashes, his gaze found mine. “Is the way you look at him.”

My mouth pinched together, my eyes fluttering, unable to deny it.

“And he looks at you the same. Like your whole worlds pivot around each other.” He cleared his throat, pushing down his clothes to make more room. “You lied to me.”

My head shot up, my lips parting in question.

“You told me you were not capable of loving.” He shook his head. “But that is untrue. You only love him.”

“I am sorry,” I whispered, stabs of his pain driving through my heart.

“We cannot help who we love, bellezza.” His gaze drove into me with a poignant expression. “It is time I go home. Caterina is thrilled I’m returning early.”

“I’ll bet.”

He tossed a few more items in and zipped up his bag, his shoulders slumping with defeat.

“Luca, I didn’t want it to be like this. Believe me. I wanted to love you more than anything. You are perfect, and it would have been so easy to love you. To have that life in Florence together… .” My voice wobbled, tears watering my eyes. “I wish I could have been that woman.”

“Me too.” He nodded, his Adam’s apple bobbing.

“There will always be a part of me that will regret letting you go.”

His mouth flattened. “I was prepared to love you forever.”

A horn honked outside, jerking our heads to the window. A taxi waited outside. In this last moment together, knowing I would probably never see him again, a ghost of pain rose in my chest. He had been such an important part of my life. He’d helped put me back on my feet, giving me strength.

“Luca…” I gulped, stepping to him. “I have no doubt you will find someone who loves you with her whole heart as you will love her. You are an amazing man. I was lucky to have met you.”

His lids blinked, grief rippling over him like a wave. He leaned over, his hand cupping my cheek. He drew me in, his mouth covering mine. I could feel the goodbye in his kiss.

He pulled away, leaning his forehead on mine, sighing deeply. “Sarò sempre dipendente dai tuoi baci.” I will always be addicted to your kisses. “Goodbye, Jayme.” He kissed my cheek and twisted away, walking out to the taxi.

The taxi driver put his luggage in the back as Luca climbed into the car. I couldn’t move or speak, feeling a tear slide down my face. He dipped his head and climbed in, the car curving out of the lot, turning down the street and dissapearing forever.

I would never see him again.

A sob burst inside my chest, and I stumbled back on the bed, my knees too weak to hold me. I leaned over my legs, cupping my face in my hands, and I cried.

All the pain, loss, devastation, and trauma came barreling over me, letting me know my heart was still in there and could still be broken.

 

 

“Watch me! Watch me!” Reece yelled as she cannonballed into the pool, splashing water on the patio where Stevie and I lay in the lounge chairs. I was on babysitting duty as Mom was taking Grandma Penny to the doctor to finally get her cast off. I think she was looking forward to it more than anyone. Grandma loved her independence and wanted to go back home. Mom complained when Grandma was with us, but I could see she didn’t want Grandma to go. She actually told her she should move closer to be near us.

Grandma had stayed in the same house after losing Grandpa Jaymerson and had a nice group of friends up there in Connecticut. But she had been spending a lot of time with her new friends here, and I think she wouldn’t mind being closer to us. Funny that my grandma had become the cool family member I wanted to hang out with.

“Come on, you got a bigger splash in you,” Stevie challenged Reece, sipping her lemonade. Snacks were piled between us, along with magazines, but nothing held my attention. Both of us were in shorts and tanks curled under the large umbrella, avoiding the intense sun rays.

Reece grinned, hopping out before running full speed back into the pool. Sprinkles of water landed on my leg, feeling amazing against my hot skin.

“One more sigh and I’m pouring my drink on your head.” Stevie gave Reece a thumbs up as she spoke to me.

“I didn’t sigh.”

“Whiskey…” She curved an eyebrow at me. “Have you tried calling him?”

“Yeah.” Okay, that time I did hear the sigh. “And texted and messaged through email and Facebook. I feel like a stalker. There are only so many places he can continue to ignore me.”

It had been a full week since everything happened. Through Jones, I heard Julia had been able to come home. Mitch and Hunter were both at the house with her. I understood they were going through a lot, but it hurt me more that I wasn’t there for him. He was all I could think about.

“Just because he and Krista aren’t together—”

“Which I still think someone needs to tell her.” Stevie held up her finger.

I didn’t disagree. I also couldn’t stop thinking about what he meant that they had tried…

“So, who do you think this baby daddy is?” Stevie popped a chip in her mouth.

“Have no idea. Might be no one we know…” I shrugged, eyeing her. “It might be Chris.”

Her head practically snapped off, turning to me. Seeing my mischievous grin, her lids narrowed.

“You’re an evil bitch, Whiskey.” She shook her head. “I’m proud.”

I chuckled. Reece flopped down at the end of my lounge, reaching for the chips.

“What are you going to do?” Stevie set her drink to the side.

I rubbed my nose with frustration. “I don’t know. All I know is I can’t just walk away from him.” After Luca left, the truth of how I felt about Hunter had become an urgent pressure inside me. Every reason not to care peeled away like the feathers on my arm.

“What about New York?”

Sagging back in my chair, I groaned. “I’m still going. The one thing I learned is I can’t stay here. My dreams are out there. But…” I wrapped my arms around my legs, knocking my head against my knees, feeling like I was torn in two. “He means everything to me. If there is a chance…”

Stevie nodded, her mouth pinching together like she could relate to my frustration and pain. “Don’t give up… on either.”

I twisted my head to her. “It might not be my choice. He may be done with me.”

Stevie laughed. “Oh Whiskey, if you saw the way he still looks at you… It’s far from done.”