Chapter Seventeen

Fire crackled and flickered, reaching for the stars, the parking lot full of people talking and laughing, the noise humming around me. Like Hunter and I had done, the winners shared their prize with everyone, a huge water trough full of all kinds of drinks, creating a jubilant atmosphere.

I was still not recovered from the tequila the night before, so I sipped a soda, wishing it could numb me like alcohol.

My lingering feelings were too much. I hated how I yearned to touch him, kiss him. But I couldn’t get my feet to walk away either. Jones and Doug were off talking to a group of girls who all came together for a ladies’ night, leaving Stevie, Chris, Hunter, and me.

Not awkward at all.

Stevie sipped her drink, looking around as if she wanted to do a dive roll out of here, the tension between her and Chris sprouting like weeds in manure. Neither one talked to the other, which put the burden on me because Hunter never minded strained silence.

“You like New York?” Chris finally spoke, each word like it was being ripped through his teeth.

Stevie’s head jerked to him, her defenses rising.

“Yes. I love it there. It’s everything this place is not,” she snipped. I flinched, despite myself. It was a simple question. He was trying. As though she could hear my thoughts, she huffed, “What about you? When are you going back on tour?”

Chris took a long swig of his beer. He and Hunter were propped against the car, all of us back together like magnets. Even though it felt like hell for all of us, we gravitated toward each other. What a difference a year and a half made. There had been tension then, giddy and forbidden. Heartache, too, but it was innocent then. Now it seemed years and endless baggage sat at our feet.

“Gonna take a break for a while.” Chris shrugged, downing the rest of his drink, not looking at Stevie. My friend’s head tilted, her gaze digging into him as if she knew he wasn’t telling her something.

“Why?” She folded her arms. “You love it and you’ve been in the top ten all season.” Did Stevie realize she had given herself away as someone who still cared enough to watch his races and know his standing?

“I’ve wondered the same thing.” Hunter twirled the water bottle in his hand. “Don’t be in a hurry to come back here.” His eyes went to the ground, a wince of bitterness laced through his voice.

“I just want to take a break,” Chris snapped, running a hand over his short brown hair. “Jesus, sorry I didn’t ask for approval.” We all stared at him in surprise. Besides Doug, Chris was one of the most laid-back guys I’d ever met. His short temper seemed ill-fitting on him. He blew out a deep breath, shaking his head, pointing at Hunter. “Like you’re doing so bad. You own a garage and have doubled the business.”

“What?” I faced Hunter. He owned the garage?

“Partial owner.” Hunter shifted uncomfortably.

“You bought it. Just because Doug’s name is on the front doesn’t make it any less yours,” Chris snapped.

“You bought the garage from old Frank?” I probed, wanting to hear any tiny insight into Hunter’s life since I left. Frank had owned the garage before I was even born.

He shrugged, glancing to the side. “Needed to invest my earnings from racing in something. Frank wanted to retire, and I needed a job.”

The last word made him swallow. The agony of not being able to race anymore pinched his features. I tried to imagine what he must have gone through the last six months. As if he hadn’t already lost enough when his twin brother was taken from him.

I watched the condensation from the soda can dripping onto my hand. My heart thumped in my chest, and I choked back the urge to wrap my arms around him, which seemed as natural as taking my next breath.

“I still don’t get it.” Stevie hadn’t taken her critical gaze off Chris. “I know how much you love racing, more than you ever let on. It’s the middle of the tour, you are doing great, and you leave?”

Muscles coiled down Chris’s shoulder’s, an expression flickering over his face too fast to read.

“Fuck, woman. Why do you care?” Standing up, he chucked his beer bottle into the garbage, the glass shattering into pieces against the metal. “You’re not my fucking girlfriend. You made that clear, so get off my ass.” He strode past her, clipping her shoulder.

She spun around, fury clenching her hands. “You’re right,” she screamed after him. “I don’t care!”

He ignored her, walking toward Jones and Doug.

“Fuck you,” she yelled, stomping off the opposite way. “Think I might revisit Pocahontas.”

“No, Stevie… don’t.” I tried to reach out, but she slipped from my grasp, on a mission to find the girl on the other side of the campfire, the girl who was already watching Stevie’s every move like a surveillance camera.

Cringing, I watched her over my shoulder. “Crap.”

“That a regret in the making?” Hunter crossed his legs, leaning into the car, motioning to Stevie.

“Oh yeah.” I nodded, turning back to him.

“Ah.” Hunter nodded, his gaze returning to mine with an intensity that made my mouth run dry.

Leave, Jayme. Walk away. It’s better for both of us. But neither of us moved, tension twisting through me.

“That’s amazing you bought the garage.” I shuffled my shoes against the gravel.

He scoffed, taking a drink.

“It’s not?” My brow curved up.

“Gee, Jayme, I don’t know. I’m doing exactly what everyone imagined I would.” His lids narrowed. “Not moving farther than this town, working at the garage, having a kid… It’s all stuff people predicted, even my father. And here I am.” He opened his arms, looking around with disdain. “Not quite twenty, and I fulfilled everyone.”

“That’s not true.” I put my hand on my hip. “And when did you start caring what other people think?”

He shook his head, tossing the empty water container over my shoulder into the recycle bin.

I could feel his rage right under the surface, the bitterness of his lost dreams. On the outside, I couldn’t deny he fulfilled what people expected, but at the same time, he was nowhere close to the “loser” the high school crowd tagged him. What he had already accomplished and lost was immense. And his losses were more than anyone should bear for his age.

“Hunter, you’ve achieved more than most will ever do in a lifetime. Do you know how famous you were? Guys in Italy knew who you were.”

“Guys?” His head punched up, then he wagged his head, standing up. “And the operative word is were.” He stood over me, his look telling me to move out of his way, but I didn’t budge.

“Your life isn’t over because you can’t race anymore.” I planted my hands on my hips, my neck cranked back in a challenge.

“Really?” He leaned over, his body encompassing, his mouth only a few inches from mine.

“No.” Heat ballooned under my damp clothes. I itched to rip them off, to feel his naked skin against mine, to lose myself in his touch. “Your life doesn’t end because your dream had to change.”

He blew air through his nose, his eyes drinking in my face. “Always the cheerleader.” A twisted smile hitched up his mouth, inching even closer to me. “And Jayme? My dream left me months before the accident,” he rumbled, sliding by me, walking away.

My mouth gaped open, and I stood there, his words like a hand plunged in burning coals. I had to grit my teeth to keep my emotions in check. Did he really mean what I thought?

Peering over my shoulder, I watched him greet his friends like he didn’t have a care in the world. No matter what we might still feel or not feel for each other, it didn’t matter. Time and circumstances had changed. His life was here with his kid—soon to be kids—and mine would be moving on in two months. We had gone through so much to be together only for fate to laugh at us and take it all away. He would be always be that hole in my soul.

My desire for him was still so strong. I knew the only thing I could do was stay far away from him. After I got my jeep back, I needed to cut all ties to Hunter Harris. Daggers dug into my heart at the thought, but my feelings no longer mattered.

He had a kid coming. Nothing competed with that.

 

 

“You look nice.” Mom smiled at me as she stepped into the living room, handing Grandma Penny a glass of water and some pills. My grandma’s leg was propped up on pillows, and she was glaring at my mother like an insolent child. She was not following the doctor’s orders to “take it easy” very well.

“Mom, stop being a baby. Take your pills.” Mom dumped them in my grandma’s palm.

“They make me feel sleepy.”

“Exactly.” Mom sighed, as though she wanted nothing more than for my grandma to sleep.

“Amy, I’m old and don’t have many days as it is. I don’t want to sleep them away.” She frowned, glancing at me like I’d back her. “Sleep when you’re dead, right? Just because you act my age doesn’t mean I have to.”

“Mother…” I could hear the exasperation in my mom’s voice.

“Ammmyy,” Grandma sighed back, mimicking her. “See… now you know when Jayme uses that tone on you how annoying it is.”

Mom’s mouth pinched together, her attention going to me. “What are you up to today that has you looking so nice?”

I brushed down the pretty, soft yellow summer dress I barely ever wore. I was a jean-shorts-and-tank kind of girl, but today I had to put my best foot forward.

“I’m going to look for a job.” Even though I was only going to be here for a few months, I needed money to pay for gas and to bring some funds with me to college. My scholarship to Virginia Tech only covered some of my tuition. We scraped by, but my parents made just enough to push me out of running for a full scholarship. My grandparents helped with my tuition, or I would never see the inside of a college classroom. I was lucky they wanted to help so I didn’t have to think about being saddled with student loans.

“Where are you going?” Mom perched herself on the arm of the sofa next to Grandma. The house was silent of giggles and screaming. My parents decided it was in everyone’s best interest to sign Reece up for camp this week, letting her exuberant energy work itself out in a larger space with friends. She was a handful lately, driving the house a bit mad.

“I don’t know. Maybe The Grill or something.” This town wasn’t big, and jobs were scarce in my age range.

“You should go to Café Lula.” Grandma wiggled higher on the pillows, looking at Mom. “I met Lula the other day in the waiting room. Nice lady. We might start a Bunco group here, since I’m going to be here for a while more. Her daughter and son-in-law mainly run it now. Let me call and see if they’re hiring.” Grandma didn’t even wait; she grabbed her mobile from the coffee table and tapped at the screen faster than my parents did on theirs.

Café Lula? Of course. The café next door to Doug’s Garage.

“No, Grandma—”

“Hey, Lula! This is Penny.” A huge smile turned up her mouth. “Oh, that’s funny. You were about to call me?” A pause. “Drinks by the pool playing cribbage sounds amazing.”

“Mom. You can’t.” My mother shook her head, but Grandma batted her away.

“Ignore my uptight daughter. Fun isn’t in her vocabulary anymore. I’d love to, Lula.” My grandma smiled into the phone. A laugh darted up my vocals. Crap, I adored that woman. “But I also had another reason for calling. My granddaughter is home for the summer and looking for a job…” She tapered off, listening with a nod. “Oh, that’s wonderful! I’ll send her down right now. She’s such a hard worker and so responsible you won’t regret it, I promise. And thank you. I’ll be over to your house by noon? Fabulous! See you then, Lula!” Grandma hung up, satisfaction and pride radiating off her. “Looks like you have an interview to go to.”

“You are a force.” I shook my head, leaning over and hugging her tight. “Thank you.”

“Anything for you, my dear.” She squeezed me back. “Hard work gets you the job, but connections never hurt to open a door.”

Especially in this town, where most summer jobs were probably taken by now.

It was Monday and I still hadn’t gotten the call about my jeep. When Mom dropped Grandma off for her playdate, she added me as an extra stop.

“Good luck. Though, I know you won’t need it.” Mom pulled into the parking lot.

“Thank you.” I hopped out. “And don’t worry about a ride later, I’ll call Stevie if my jeep isn’t ready.”

“Okay.” She nodded, looking relieved; I knew she had a lot of work to do.

I stepped into the cute, colorful café. Bright walls and multicolored chairs gave it a warm, eclectic vibe. It was mainly a coffee shop, but it sold packaged foods and bakery items for those who used the café as an office or quick spot to grab a bite.

Two people stood in line, a barista taking their orders. Then I groaned, dropping my shoulders in distress.

Seriously? Of all the luck.

Savannah, my ex-friend and nemesis, stood behind the counter, wearing tiny shorts and a clingy white tank top. Her dark hair was streaked with caramel and tied back in a messy ponytail. She looked bored to death as she took orders.

What the hell was she doing here? She wasn’t the “I need a job” type. Her parents treated her like a spoiled child and with one stomp of her foot she got whatever she wanted.

I needed a job. Badly. I didn’t have a wealthy family, but could I work with her? Maybe I can find can something else?

The moment the thought ran through my head, annoyance gnashed my teeth together. I would not let Savannah drive me away from a possible job. I was stronger than that, than her. I would not cower away from anyone anymore just because it was uncomfortable or awkward.

The patrons moved to the side to wait for their orders to be served. I recognized one of them as a guy from school who had been in the year after ours. I think his name was Paul. Savannah’s eyes lurched up and met his before noticing me. She blinked a few times before a snarl curled her lips.

“Just when you think the trash had been put out for good.” She tilted her head, staring around the guy to me, her hand going to her hip.

I shouldn’t engage. I shouldn’t…

“It’s not nice to talk about your relationship with Jason like that… Oh, wait, he’s dating Aubrey now, isn’t he?”

Savannah’s glare narrowed on me. I knew her well enough to understand his moving on to Aubrey bothered her more than their own breakup. She would want him to keep pining after her, while she played him, stringing him along to sedate her own ego. She probably didn’t want him, but she sure wouldn’t want him dating Aubrey.

“Like I care who Jason sees. I’ve moved on to college guys,” she snipped, twirling the end of her ponytail. “So many text and call me I can’t keep track.”

“Hmmm. And they called me a slut?” Okay, Jayme, stop. This was a game I couldn’t win; Savannah had years of being bitchy and horrible to me.

“Uh. Excuse me? Can I order?” The guy at the counter tried to get her attention, but she ignored him.

Savannah’s chest puffed, her manicured nails curling into her palm. “There isn’t a day I don’t wish you died instead of Colton. Colton’s life is worth so much more than yours.”

I tried to not show the way her words struck home, a knife to my own suppressed guilt. She inflicted it in my gut as if I didn’t still carry guilt of Colton’s death with me. I’d realized a while back I would always bear the pain and the what-ifs. I wished he could have lived, but sadly he didn’t, and I couldn’t live in the crippling world of regret.

“So, you work here.” I cleared my throat, flipping the subject around to her, my eyebrows arching.

“It’s not like I need to.” She took the bait, her eyes flaring with defense. “So boring being back here for the summer. Daddy thought it would be good experience.”

Her parents weren’t rolling in money like Jason’s, “Daddy” had gotten the family in debt with his exuberant spending, trying to keep up with the McKees and Harrises of the town.

“Savannah. Customer.” A tall blonde, looking to be in her thirties, came out of the back, frowning at her employee.

Savannah rolled her eyes and turned back to the customer.

“Hey, you must be Jaymerson. I’m Kayla.” She reached out her hand for mine. “My mom called and told me you’d be coming.”

“Hi, Kayla.” I shook her hand, watching Savannah’s eyes widen in understanding.

“Grab a table and I’ll bring over an application. You ever work as a barista before?”

“No, but I was at the one in Florence so often, they thought I did.”

Kayla chuckled, nodding her head. “I’ll be right back.”

I headed for an empty table, only to hear feet stomping behind me.

“Hell no,” Savannah hissed. “You are not working here. I will not work with you!” Her gaze raked down me like I was sludge.

“Oh good. Does that mean you’re going to quit?” I sat in the chair, peering sweetly at her.

“No,” she exclaimed. “You’re the one leaving. Not me!”

“If you don’t need to work here, then why bother?”

“Because…” She glanced around like she was afraid someone could overhear her. “Maybe I want to work here.”

“Please, Savannah.” I burst out laughing. “Like you wouldn’t rather be lying by the pool, flipping through a magazine, having someone wait on you.”

The fury growing behind her eyes told me that was exactly what she’d rather be doing, and this job wasn’t because she wanted to be here.

“Fuck you, Jayme,” she hissed, leaning over me. “You are so fucking pathetic. You’re just getting this job so you can stalk that loser.” She flicked her head to the garage viewable outside the windows. “You know he’s having a baby, right? With Krista? At least he saw you for the slut you are. Not that he’s any better. God, maybe you two were actually perfect for each other.”

“Savannah?” Kayla stepped behind her, tilted her head. “Do we have a problem here?”

Savannah jerked up, placing a fake smile over her mouth.

“No.” She shook her head. “Catching up with an old friend.”

“There’s someone at the counter.” Kayla nodded for Savannah to leave, watching her walk away before sitting in the chair across from mine, sighing deeply. She didn’t say anything, but I thought I detected some dislike of Savannah in her narrowed gaze. This made me wonder who got her the job. Did she get it on her own merits, or had her daddy made it possible?

“We only have a few shifts open; summer gets a little quieter.” Kayla slid an application to me. “Is that okay?”

“Yes.” I nodded, though I knew I needed more shifts to get the money I needed. “I’m thankful you have any.”

“Yeah, jobs are tough right now, but…” She leaned back in her chair, touching her stomach. “Jon does want me to work a little less. We just found out I’m pregnant. It’s been really rough.” She squeezed her eyes shut. “Let’s just say we’ve been at this place several times before, struggled for a very long time… and the doctors think I need to take it easy.”

My heart went out, seeing the pain behind her eyes she tried not to show.

“Your timing is actually perfect.” She rolled her shoulders back, tucking away the raw emotions. “Can you start tomorrow?”

I nodded. “Am I hired? Don’t I need to fill out the application?”

“Yes.” She waved at the paper. “You do need to fill it out, but I have a gut feeling about you. I think you’ll be a perfect fit.”

“Thank you.”

“Your normal shifts will be early Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Saturdays. Does that work?” She didn’t wait for me to respond, pointing at the guy behind the counter. “I’ll have Tim train you this week before you go on your own. There’s no real uniform, except hair back and closed-toe shoes. We provide aprons.” She pushed back from her seat. “Welcome to the team, Jayme. Jon will be here when you come tomorrow. You’ll meet him then.”

“Again, thank you, Kayla.”

She smiled, turning toward the back of the café.

“When you’re done, leave the application at the front… Actually, give it to Tim.” A knowing grin tipped her mouth, like she understood that trusting Savannah with anything related to me was a mistake. She stopped at the counter and said something to Tim and Savannah that made Savannah frown.

I could feel Savannah’s glare boiling my skin as I finished the application. She was a bitch and would try to make my life hell here, but I didn’t care. High school was over; all that crap was in my past. If she still had to play the role of mean girl to make herself feel better, then so be it. She’d realize fast my give-a-fuck quotient was set to zero.

Just then, I caught movement out the window and my insides clenched before my conscious mind even realized what, or who, I was seeing.

Hunter moved to the open garage doors, a mobile pressed to his ear, his hand rubbing his forehead as he paced. I couldn’t hear him, but I knew how he acted when he was annoyed. He kept shaking his head and staring at the sky. When he hung up, he looked like he wanted to toss his cell across the street, but he walked over to the table under the trees instead, sitting on the bench. He leaned over his legs, his palms pressed into his head.

It felt like an ache in my own heart, convulsing my muscles to move to him, but until I heard the squeal of wood on the floor, I didn’t realize I was actually doing it. Half standing and about to go to him, I forced my butt back in the chair. I hadn’t seen him since Friday, when he walked away from me.

The weekend had been one long pretense that I wasn’t thinking about him. He wasn’t there when I helped Mom make dinner, or when I went swimming with my sister, or curled on the sofa and watched a movie. Nope, he was never dancing at the edge of my consciousness like a sliver in my finger. Or so I told myself.

He stayed there for a full minute before he sat back, flipping his phone around in his hands like it would give him an answer, then stabbed at the screen.

Buuzzzz.

My cell hummed in my bag, jolting my spine straight. I peered at my bag then back at Hunter, who stood again and paced around the table outside.

Was it just a coincidence? Reaching into my bag, I saw an unfamiliar number scroll over the screen.

“Hello?” A hiccup of air stuck in my throat.

“Jayme?” His deep voice slid into my ear. I glanced back at him across the street. “Hey. It’s Hunter.”

My heart pounded against my chest like it wanted to leap out and run over to him.

“Hey.” I swallowed, tracking his every move. He looked pained, like this was the last call in the world he wanted to make.

“Sorry to bother you. Wanted to let you know the part still hasn’t come in for your car.” His voice held no emotion, but his expression was clenched and he tapped his forehead with his fist. “Hopefully tomorrow. Sorry for the inconvenience.”

Was that what the call was about? My radiator hadn’t come in? Did he want me out of his life so bad he’d get that angry over having to keep my car another day?

“Oh.” I felt strange watching him without him knowing. “It’s not your fault.”

He ran his hand down his face again. “I’ll have your car done as soon as I can. I’m sure you need it.”

Actually, with this new job, I did.

“Thank you.” I wasn’t sure why I felt like crying.

“Yeah. Okay.” He put his hand on his hip, the cell pressed to his ear, but he didn’t say goodbye or hang up, his boot digging into the small lawn.

“Was there something else?”

He exhaled, like the weight of the world was all on him.

“Hunter?” Why was I so desperate to hold on to this call, to not let go of even the tiniest thread between us?

I saw his head shake before he answered. “No. That’s it.” He pinched his nose. “Bye, Jayme.”

The phone went dead in my hand. I felt like someone had just snipped the ropes of the fragile bridge I was standing on, plunging me to the river below.

He stomped into the garage, the shadows gobbling him up from view.

“Wow. Stalk much?” Savannah stood next to me, a smirk on her glossy lips telling me she heard everything. “That was even more pathetic than I imagined. I was half kidding earlier, but you really are still in love with him, aren’t you? He’s hot; I won’t knock you on that. But he’s a fuckin’ loser. A man who has not one but two kids with another girl. At nineteen. He’s working as a mechanic and will probably be bald and fat by the time he turns thirty. Glad you’ve set the bar so high.” She snorted, turning back for the counter.

I longed to punch her in the face. Crap, what happened to not giving a shit? Taking a breath, I finished the form and handed it to Tim, getting out of there before I actually hit Savannah.

You can do this, Jayme. Two months, that’s it. You’ve been through hell. Working with Savannah should be nothing.

I was disappointed in myself that I could go through the worst pain and life changes ever, losing my boyfriend, learning to walk again, traveling the world, and yet all it took to sink me was Savannah tapping at my one weakness.