Bam
TUESDAY CAME FAR too quickly, and I found myself dropped back at the hotel watching Lucy driving away with a sadness I hadn’t expected. As I crossed the lobby of the hotel, I was greeted by Jeff, the perky-as-shit day manager. He let me know in his “most helpful” tone that it was well past my scheduled check out time and that all of my belongings were safely stored for my convenience. Apparently, the band had only been booked at the hotel through Sunday and I had forgotten to extend my stay before leaving for the beach house.
“Are you able to book me into another room?” I asked.
“I’m sorry, sir, the hotel is completely sold out. There’s a conference in town.”
“Hmm, okay, any suggestions on another place?”
“I’m sorry, sir, the city’s essentially sold out. It’s a large conference.” He waved me toward the concierge desk. “Let me see if there’s anything outside of the city.”
“Thanks, Jeff,” I said, and followed him. I spent several minutes standing at the desk while Jeff typed away on the computer. In the end, the closest hotel he could find was a Motel 6 almost thirty miles away. Not conducive to caring for a new relationship when one doesn’t have a car.
“Thanks for checking.” I handed Jeff a folded five dollar bill.
He then went to retrieve my bags as I dialed Lucy’s number.
“Hi, Bam,” she answered.
“Hey. Are you guys far away?”
“Not too far, we’re in traffic. Did you forget something in the car?” Lucy asked.
“No, I sort of got kicked out of my hotel.” I chuckled. “The manager tried to find something else…”
“But the conference is making it hard to find anything?”
I sighed. “Exactly.”
“We need to turn around and go back to the hotel please,” she said to Sully.
“No, I don’t need you to do that,” I countered. “I just need a recommendation on where to stay.”
“If Jeff couldn’t find something, I’d imagine there isn’t anything. He’s very helpful.”
“No shit,” I said with a chuckle.
“Okay, give me a few.” I could hear the smile in her voice. “I’ll make some calls and let you know what I come up with. Sit tight and we’ll be right there.”
“Thanks, baby.”
I hung up and dragged my bag outside. The hotel was busy, and after my idyllic weekend, I needed some fresh air.
Sully’s Town Car had barley stopped moving when Lucy swung the back door open.
“Hey, mister, I hear you’re looking for a place to stay,” she said playfully.
“Sure, but that back seat looks a little small for the two of us. I was hoping for something a little roomier.”
“Get in. I’ve got somewhere special to take you.”
Lucy and I held hands as we drove through downtown Seattle. She was silent for most of the drive, choosing to communicate most through a series of adorable grins. She looked like the canary that had eaten the cat. I had no idea where we were going, but I didn’t care because it meant I got more time with my girl.
Twenty minutes later I was standing at the front door of a palatial mansion that looked like something from the Italian countryside.
“Welcome to my parents’ house,” Lucy said with a triumphant smile on her face.
“Are you fuckin’ kidding me?” I said in a low tone.
“What? You need a place to stay, they have plenty of room, and you were going to have to meet them at some point anyway―no time like the present.” Lucy looked very pleased with herself.
“Lucy, this is the third time within a week I’ve worn these clothes. I’ve got a black eye and I just spent the weekend rolling around on a couch with you like a horny teenager. You really think this is the time to meet the folks?”
“Don’t worry, just be yourself and they will love you. It’ll be fine.”
Oh yeah, no fucking problem, you’re just about to meet a rock legend and you look like a rented sack of turds.
Lucy opened the large front door, which was unlocked. We had driven through a private security gate on the way in, but I was still surprised at this. Where I come from, people don’t have shit, but what little they do have is protected tooth and nail. I thought about the Haddon’s hiring Sully and how seriously he took his job of protecting Lucy. People tend to protect what is most valuable to them.
“I don’t think this is such a great idea. I can find a hotel… really,” I argued while we stepped into the grand entry way.
“Don’t be silly. I told you they have plenty of room.”
“It’s not the space I’m concerned about Lucy, I—”
I was interrupted by Roxie Haddon as she descended one side of the double staircase.
“Lucy girl, what are you doing here, everything okay?” Roxie was stunning. Her energy immediately filled the entire room and her welcoming smile immediately made me feel at ease.
What is it about these women that has such a calming effect on me?
“Like Dad didn’t fill you in as soon as I hung up with him,” Lucy droned sarcastically.
Roxie grinned and faced me. “You must be Bam, it’s so nice to finally meet you,”
“Yes ma’am, thank you very much, it’s a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Haddon. I’m so sorry for the intrusion.”
“Please, call me Roxie, and this is no intrusion at all. I hate that my baby girl lives so far away from me. Any reason to get her back here where she belongs is fine by me.”
“Mom, I live ten minutes away,” Lucy said.
“See? Too far,” Roxie retorted dryly.
“With no hotels open, Dad said Bam could stay in the guest house for a few days.”
“Of course, we’d love to have you Bam. It’ll give us a chance to get to know you better before the tour. We saw you play at the Gunnach Benefit and I could see why Lucy is such a big Roses for Anna fan.”
I turned slowly to face Lucy whose cheeks had turned bright red.
“Is that a fact? A big Roses for Anna fan, hm? I’m not sure Lucy has mentioned that.”
“Mom,” Lucy growled.
“What? I didn’t know it was some sort of secret. I just figured with all the posters on your wall when you were younger, that you would have told him you were a fan.”
I couldn’t figure out if Roxie was really innocent or stirring the pot. Apparently, the mother/daughter resemblance extended beyond their good looks.
“Posters?” I gasped with mock surprise. “You had my poster on your wall?”
“One poster! I had one Roses for Anna Poster.”
“Plus the one of Bam…shirtless…against the brick wall,” Roxie added.
“Mom!” The volume and pitch of Lucy’s voice apparently caught the attention of Rex Haddon.
“What are you two fighting about now?” he asked grinning as he walked down the stairs.
I tried not to stare, but I could do little else. Although in his early fifties, he looked like he was ready to kick ass and take names. I suddenly realized that, very, very soon, I’d be sharing a stage with this man. I would get to watch RatHound from the side of the stage every night. The fifteen-year-old kid inside of me freaked out.
“Please tell mom to stop,” Lucy pleaded with her father.
Rex shrugged. “She’s never listened to me before; I don’t know what makes you think she’d start today.”
Lucy glared at her father before replacing her expression with a gentle smile. “Bam, this is my father, Rex. Dad, this is Bam.”
“Of course. How are you Bam? It’s nice to meet you.”
I shook his hand but wasn’t exactly overcome with peace like I had been with the Haddon women. Don’t get me wrong, Rex was friendly enough, but he clearly wasn’t “impressed” with me. I was well aware that any charm I might possess would not work on him. Not that I wanted to charm him or his family. In the same way that I felt a need to fully reveal myself to Lucy, I felt a need to be very honest with the Haddon family.
“I’m fine thanks… doing great actually… it’s… a real honor to meet you sir. Thank you so much for this… ah… opportunity.” Words were starting to lose meaning as they fell from my mouth.
Pull it together, shithead.
“We’re really looking forward to the tour, and please, call me Rex. Are you hungry? I was just going to make us a little something to eat.”
Keep your cool.
“Um… no thank you, sir… ah… Rex,” I stammered. “I’d love to be able to clean up somewhere, maybe do a load of laundry.”
“Of course,” Roxy said. “Lucy, sweetie, why don’t you give Bam a tour of the guest house and show him where he can put his dirty clothes.”
“Oh, I don’t mind washing them myself Ma’am—Roxy.”
“Wow, Rex could learn a few things from you Bam, and Lucy girl over there as well.” Roxie motioned playfully toward Lucy who did nothing to defend herself.
“Lucy Haddon. Am I to infer, from your mother’s comment, that you do not do your own laundry?”
“It’s not like I couldn’t,” she answered defensively.
“Wait just a minute. I thought you hated spoiled kids.”
“Spoiled, who said I was spoiled? I just happen to like the way my mother washes and folds the best.”
“She washes and folds for you? No, that’s not right. That’s not right at all.”
“I don’t mind.” Roxy smiled. “My personal laundry service gets her and her brother to come by the house more often.”
I looked at Lucy sternly and wagged a finger at her. “Not right one bit.”
She grabbed my finger and bent it a little painfully while keeping a serene smile on her face. “Come on, Mr. Shit Stirrer, please allow me to show you to your quarters.”