Felicia

Awakening in Rex’s arms, a myriad of feelings from last night immediately floods my mind. I don’t have any regrets, but there is still an uneasiness inside me due to his former profession. His ability to effectively detach feelings from sex makes me wonder if he’s capable of a deep, meaningful relationship. Will he be able to find happiness in the long term by being monogamous? It only took Kip two and a half years to get sick of me, and he didn’t have anywhere near the experience that Rex has. Of course, I’m basing that on the level of his skills. I snicker to myself.

Rex is still sound asleep, and he’s every bit as gorgeous with his eyes closed. He’s now sporting a next morning shadow and it looks great on him. The stubble only accentuates his masculine jawline and cleft chin. I want to run my fingers through his wavy brown hair, but I refrain. Instead, I just snuggle back into him and close my eyes, relishing his body heat.

Just as I begin to drift off, I feel his hand moving along the curve of my hip. “Good morning, gorgeous,” he whispers when I crack my eyes open. “Did you get some sleep?”

“I did.” I smile, giving him a quick kiss. “It felt a little strange waking up here. It’s been a long time since I slept with someone new.”

“Yeah, me too. Like a decade or so.” He chuckles, gliding his hand up the curve of my back.

“What?” I roll onto my side, wondering what the hell he’s talking about. “You’ve slept with hundreds of women.”

“No, I’ve had sex with lots of clients,” he counters. “I haven’t actually slept with anyone since my last girlfriend in college. I told you, it was a business, and I had a firm rule to never spend the night. Otherwise, it would ramp up their future expectations.”

“That sounds so cold. I totally don’t get how you can detach that way,” I reply, still amazed by the fact. “I mean, how can you feel okay fucking someone but it’s not okay to sleep next to them?”

“It was a service that I was performing to help them overcome a problem they were having in their life,” he explains in a calm, calculated tone. “Spending the night with someone is an emotional commitment. Why do you think most guys sneak out of a one-night stand before the sun comes up? It has a certain finality to it.”

“So that’s why men sneak out?” I ask, having heard Becca bitch about it on several occasions.

“That’s it. Most men are scared of emotional commitment even if they find someone attractive.” He pauses with a conflicted look crossing his face. “It’s not right. Men suck at dealing with their emotions. That’s why I was always very upfront with my clients. They knew in advance that there was no chance of anything more than the therapy session. That’s also why I avoided dating for an entire decade—because that made it harder to keep things compartmentalized.”

“That’s crazy.” I can’t imagine putting my personal life on hold for my entire twenties. Of course, I can’t imagine having sex with hundreds of men, even if I were some sort of therapist. “That had to be kind of a lonely existence.”

“Which is why I quit,” he says, brushing his nose against mine. “That and the fact that I was always worried about STDs due to the law of large numbers. I knew it would only take one error in judgment or one accident to change everything.”

“I find it hard to believe that you never caught anything,” I reply, as it seems nearly impossible that someone could avoid them under those extreme circumstances. “Even HPV?”

“It was always negative,” he says with curl of his lip. “I went in and got retested for everything again last Friday just to be positive. Everything came back clean and negative.”

“Well, that’s good, because I don’t handle latex very well,” I inform him. “I can have sex with condoms once or twice, but then I start to get irritated. I have an IUD, so we don’t have to worry about getting pregnant.”

“Have you been tested?” he asks, shocking me just a bit. “I’m sorry, but I trust Kip about as far as I can throw him.”

“Good point.” A wave of anxiety washes over me. “You’re right though. I’m not so sure he was being faithful during those out of town games.”

“I always told my clients to get tested if they had any doubts. There is no upside to not knowing. It only endangers you and your partners,” he adds, sounding like my high school health teacher. “For now, I have some polyurethane condoms we can use. I don’t like them as much because they’re so goddamn tight.”

“I’m sorry. I normally see my gynecologist in the fall, but I’ll see if I can get in on Monday.” The thought of having an STD once again sends my anxiety level through the roof. “I get so embarrassed having to talk about stuff like this. Especially to her. She always seems so judgmental.”

“Just tell her that you suspect your long-term boyfriend was cheating on you and you want to be sure,” he says, caressing my cheek. “She will respect you for it.”

“That’s a good idea. I’m not a ho, but my last boyfriend might have been.” I giggle in relief, liking the thought of addressing it that way. “I still feel a little weird that you were the one who slept with hundreds of people and you’re worried about being with me.”

“I’m not worried,” he says, pushing my hair behind my ear and giving me a warm smile. “I just want to make love to you without any worries.”

“That would be nice. Did you get tested last Friday for me?” I ask, suddenly curious of the timing.

“I got tested for me,” he says with a spark in his eyes. “But yes, I wanted to be able to tell you that I’m one hundred percent sure there are no issues. I knew at some point, you would find out about my past, and I wanted to be able to reassure you.”

I sigh and let out a long breath. “It does bother me that you were a . . .”

“You’d better not say that G-word again.” He cuts me off, arching an eyebrow. “I was a sex surrogate. It’s a real profession, and I’ve helped lots of women move forward and have more fulfilling relationships. Unfortunately, those aren’t the ones you see calling my phone. Believe me, though, ninety percent of my clients are better off than they were before me. Like any business, you can’t help everyone.”

“Sex surrogate—that’s what I was going to say.” I smile and give him another kiss. “I’m sorry for using the G-word. But reluctant gigolo sounds a lot funnier than a sex surrogate.”

He bites his bottom lip as he begins to tickle me in a way that I haven’t been tickled in years. I can’t hold back my screams as his fingers travel up my ribcage and into my armpits. “Okay, I give. I’m sorry,” I gasp, not liking the feeling of being completely at his mercy. “I hate being tickled.”

“Why? It’s fun,” he counters, giving me one last dose.

“Yeah, fun for the one tickling. I have an older brother who used to tickle me until I practically peed my pants.” I think back to how he used to treat me when we were home alone. “I hated him for it. He was so cruel.”

“Hmm, I thought you were an only child,” he says, since I haven’t mentioned my sole sibling. “I’m not very close to my sister either. She’s six years older than me, so I didn’t really grow up with her. When I was eleven, she received a scholarship to Princeton and I didn’t see much of her after that. Except Christmas and an occasional holiday.”

“Yeah, I get it. My brother is five years older. Does she still live out east?”

“Yup. She’s the administrator of a big hospital in Boston, so my parents are very proud.” He smirks before a sullen look settles on his lips. “Okay, enough of this family bullshit. I’d much rather pick up where we left off last night.” He gives me a devilish smile that immediately sends a wave of energy through my core. “Do you have any requests?”

“It’s funny you ask, because yes, I have one request.” I hesitate momentarily, wondering just how honest I should be with him. “Don’t treat me like a client.”

“Is that what I did last night?” he asks, taken aback by the bluntness of my request.

“Yeah, it kind of felt like you were trying to keep your winning streak alive,” I explain, again coming off harsher than intended. “I’m sorry. Your technique is great, but I don’t want it to be some sort of competition.”

“You didn’t fake that last part, did you?” he asks, narrowing his eyes.

“No, I didn’t need to fake anything,” I reply, feeling a flutter of nerves in my stomach. “It was amazing, but . . .”

“You’re right,” he says, leaning in and giving me a reassuring kiss. “I was totally focused on giving you the best orgasm of your life. I really wanted to rock your world.”

“You rocked my world, but I want you to relax and be with me. Don’t worry about which spots will send me into oblivion. Just be in the moment and really be with me,” I try to explain. “It might sound selfish, but I spent the last few years with someone who was almost never present. By the way, I never want to hear Chris Berman and Sports Center in the bedroom again. I want someone who wants to really be with me.”

“Thanks for being honest,” he says with a reflective look in his eyes.

“Can I be honest with you?” he asks, causing an involuntary cringe. “It’s nothing bad.”

“Of course. You should always be honest. If we can’t be honest with each other, we won’t last at work or here.”

“I’m probably going to really suck at some of these relationship things in the beginning,” he says with a look of regret. “I’ve spent so much time compartmentalizing my feelings that I’m really going to have to work on having a normal relationship.”

“We both need to work on it,” I reply, running my fingers through his hair. “I’ve never had a good relationship either, and I’m sure plenty of that was my fault. I tend to be a little too direct, overly judgmental, and maybe even a bit prudish.”

“Honestly, that’s why I’m sort of shocked by the fact that you’re here,” he replies, his hand once again gliding across my skin. “I thought it would take a month or two before I coaxed you into my bed.”

“I honestly don’t know how you managed it either.” I smile and shake my head, still struggling with my own disbelief. “Actually, I do know. You’re so different from anyone I’ve ever met. I really like how relaxed you are about things. Sending that dildo home with me didn’t hurt either.” I reach down and take his cock in my hand. “It’s a great dildo, but I like the real thing a lot better. Although, there was quite a resemblance between the two.”

“You didn’t know that it was an actual copy? That’s why it’s called the RH Signature line,” he explains with a smile. “I’m just sorry the real thing didn’t get you off as easily as the copy.”

“Don’t say things like that,” I counter, snuggling into him and stroking him more aggressively. “You just tried a little too hard.” A rush of horniness washes through me as his cock becomes rock hard in my hand. “Last night, you kept telling me to just relax. That’s all I’m asking of you.”

“Okay,” he replies with zero hesitation, rolling over onto his back. “The condoms are in the second drawer down. The ones in the red wrapper don’t have any latex.” He smiles broadly as he flexes his rock hard dick, making it bounce for me. “It looks like it’s ready to roll.”

I’m even more excited than last night after seeing how easy it is to talk to him. Kip would’ve completely flipped out if I ever mentioned anything about his performance in bed. I’m becoming more confident that Rex is someone who can expand the little box I’ve been living in, especially when it comes to my sex life, which has been incredibly unsatisfying until now. The scariest part is that I actually wanted to settle for an unfulfilling life with Kip instead of being forced to reenter the dating pool. That’s why after seeing his picture on the bettergasms.com website, I just had to meet him. After all, who doesn’t want a bettergasm, especially from a guy as hot as him? I shimmy down his sculpted body, kissing my way over his bulging pecs before lingering a minute or two on his ripped abs. I need to learn his secret for getting so cut.

A surge of energy goes through me as I draw his bulging head past my lips. It reminds me of my first experience with his lifelike dildo, but he tastes a whole lot better. Other than the flavor, the silicone replica is spot on though. It feels exactly the same as I draw it deeper into my mouth. Not wanting to gag myself, I use one hand to massage the base of his cock while stroking his balls with the other. After a few minutes, my thoughts turn to teasing him in order to return the favor from last night. I pull back and swirl my tongue around his head while tracing the length of his shaft with my fingertips. After moving up and down it a few times, I let my fingers continue down to his balls, doing slow, soft circles around them. The moans coming from above are providing all the assurance I need to know that I’m on the right course.

“You’re a good tease,” he says after a few more minutes of persistence. “But I don’t think I can possibly get more aroused.” He reaches down to coax me back up to him. “You’re supposed to be up here, focused on me,” he says with a wink.

“Oh, believe me, I’m going to focus directly on you,” I reply, ripping open the condom and beginning to roll it onto his glistening cock. He’s right, this thing is so snug that I have to use my fingernails to unroll it. “If I ever get this thing on, that is.” He laughs out loud as he patiently watches me struggle.

“They’re a bitch,” he groans. “That shit doesn’t stretch like latex.”

I get to the point where the first six inches are covered, and that’s going to have to be good enough. This thing is definitely not going to slip off. We’ll probably have to cut him out of it. Either that or just have to wait until he goes limp. Probably a better idea. I giggle at my thoughts as I slip my leg across his waist and lean forward to give him a kiss. “All you need to do to make me totally aroused is keep kissing me,” I tell him before taking his lips with mine. After a few attempts, I reach back to slip the tip of his cock inside me. Rocking my hips just slightly, I can feel his head hitting the spot that he was focused on the night before. The curve of his dick is perfect, something I noticed that first night with the dildo. That curve and the size of his head are the perfect combination. “I love how that feels,” I whisper against his lips.

“It’s heaven,” he agrees and begins caressing the sides of my body with his hands. “Everything about you is heavenly,” he adds, grinning against my lips. “I love the way you move.”

I’m pretty sure he loves the way I move because it’s the exact inverse of what he was doing to me. My tongue dances with his as I continue the short, focused strokes that are already causing my thighs to tremble. An overwhelming burst of passion washes over me as we remain locked in an extended kiss. All of my thoughts and worries dissipate into thin air as our bodies melt into one another. I’ve never felt more in sync with anyone, so completely controlled by lustful feelings, and I’ve never come close to reaching an orgasm while being on top. Today is different, however, as my arms suddenly lose their strength and I begin trembling like never before. I drop to my elbows, continuing to thrust against him, not wanting this feeling to end.

I feel his arm wrap around me, and he instantly flips me onto my back. “You’re my sole focus,” he says as the first wave of my orgasm continues to send shudders through me. He pulls back momentarily, allowing me to recover just slightly before devouring my lips with his and thrusting deep within me.

Oh, my God! I cry out in my head, unable to utter a word. He continues to give me deep, full strokes that immediately bring back those orgasmic sensations. I sense my legs trembling once again, but it no longer matters, so I simply enjoy the crazy, out of control feelings that are flowing through my body. Our lips and tongues continue to tangle as he steadily increases the intensity, seemingly giving me everything he has to offer. My body melts into the sheets and I kiss him hungrily as I feel another climax fast approaching. “Oh, fuck!” I cry out as something is unleashed below, delivering a sensation that is so strange and so amazing all at the same time. Part of me fears the worst, but the feeling of him pulsating deep within me immediately obliterates any worry.

“That was amazing,” he exclaims with wide eyes. “I know that has to be a first.” His eyes spark, and I’m still not sure exactly what just happened. I crane my neck, trying to look below, but his body is blocking my view. “Don’t worry,” he assures me. “You just squirted, and it was awesome. The feeling of you doing it immediately sent me over the edge. It was incredible.” He smiles against my cheek, obviously proud of the accomplishment.

We both grow quiet, and a feeling of contentment washes over my body unlike anything I’ve ever felt. Not only have I experienced my first orgasms with a man, but whatever just happened was way beyond anything I ever could’ve imagined. I have to agree with Rex, it was amazing! I wish I didn’t have to leave and get ready for a wedding, but I promised Mom that I would go with her. Otherwise, we probably wouldn’t leave his bedroom for the rest of the day.