Four Months Later…
I HAD NEVER been as terrified as I was that day in that cold room. Not until I saw Cade had I begun to relax. I drawn on his strength because I’d been losing so much of mine.
When I told him I trusted him, I meant it with every fiber of my being. I loved him fifteen years ago, and I loved him in this moment.
Now, Cade sat at my head while a man named Blade tattooed ink into my skin. The needles poked into my skin, the buzz of the machine echoing throughout the small, enclosed room. The pricks really didn’t hurt; I was pretty numb to it.
The external wounds had healed, leaving two very disturbing words etched into my flesh. I had put the ointment on them just like the doctor said in hopes it would allow the cuts to heal without marking my skin. It didn’t work, and even though Cade said he didn’t give a shit, I did.
There was no way I would be able to go through life, head held high, with those words from that dickhead etched into me, let alone have Cade see them every time I was naked in front of him. No. That wasn’t happening.
Getting a tattoo never really crossed my mind over the years. I thought they were hot as hell on men and pretty sexy on some of my girls at Sirens, but never had I thought of doing it myself. Not until this.
I’d been lying in his tattoo-covered arms when I came up with the idea. I got up from the bed that moment, grabbed my laptop, and began my search for ideas. Cade watched then joined me, holding me while I looked. It was the first time I felt like I was going to be okay.
“You good?” Blade asked, looking up from his needle, and I heard Cade shift.
“Yeah, keep going.”
The buzzing started again, and I closed my eyes, letting this man wipe away the last physical reminders of that fateful night.
I’d checked in on Nanette, who was living with a girlfriend of hers. Her outside wounds had healed, but her internal ones seemed to keep her on edge. Cade told me the Vipers offered to help Nanette, which she accepted. At this point, it was mostly monetary, but I’d talked to her about seeing a professional. Last time I’d talked to her, she’d said she would think about it. That was the best I could do.
As far as Stacy, she’d disappeared one day, only to be found in a ditch off the highway a few days later. She’d never spoken to anyone, refusing to take any help from the Vipers. I hated to think about what had happened to her, and I was so damn sorry she’d had to go through it.
Cade admitted he carried Lee and Stacy’s deaths on his shoulders. But like he’d told me, It’s part of the life, and I accepted that when I took the job as president. It didn’t mean that I couldn’t comfort him in hopes of relieving some of that weight.
We all attended both of their services. Lee’s parents were utterly distraught, and I felt that guilt. If Lee hadn’t been with me that night, he’d still be alive. Cade told me to let him carry that load, but I’d never forget. Never forget either of them.
Stacy’s service only consisted of the Vipers and myself. She had no family, and no friends had showed up. Sad didn’t even cut it. I hoped she’d found her peace.
As I looked into the mirror four and a half hours later, tears came to my eyes. In that moment, I didn’t give a shit if Blade or Cade saw me cry. No, because this moment was for me. The intricate design was outlined. It would take at least one more session, if not two, to get all the shading right.
Along my stomach and rib cage, up past my breasts was a dazzling mix of roses, stems with thorns and leaves that all interconnected, making one large piece on my body. Not fully shaded, it still looked beautiful. I looked beautiful. For the first time in four months, I felt it. I felt me.
I took back something that had been ripped from me. I erased it and survived it. I was alive and had a good man at my side. Happy didn’t even sound like a good enough word for me at the moment, but I was running with it.
Cade stepped behind me, his chin coming to my shoulder. “You’ve always been the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever seen.” He kissed my shoulder.
Shivers went down my spine, and a tingle started between my legs. My breathing picked up as I stared into Cade’s eyes.
A snap of gloves in the room made me jump.
“On that note, keep it clean and put this on it.” Blade handed me a tube of ointment. “And if you’re gonna fuck, make sure not to get his sweat or any friction on it. Be creative.” He winked at us both as he exited the room.
“Creative, huh?” I said to Cade as I pulled the shirt over my bare body, sans bra because of the tattoo. I figured that was going to be my norm for a while, and I was totally fine with that.
“I can do creative.” Cade grabbed me, consuming me with a kiss that I’d missed and never wanted to end again. I needed this, needed him.
I threaded my fingers through his hair, pulling him as close to me as I could.
A cough came from the doorway, and we broke apart, looking at Blade who wore a wide smile on his face.
“Next client’s comin’ in.”
“Fuck,” Cade growled, grabbed my hand, and pulled us out the door then onto his bike, which I fucking loved riding, and took us home.
*****BONUS MESSAGE FROM THE COLONEL******
You hate me. That’s the way it’s supposed to be.
Always remember, looks can be deceiving.