Holden’s car hums around me as we make our way to Cresthill Home for the Elderly. I’m trying really hard not to be nervous, but I am.

I’m sitting in Holden Carter’s Mustang, for crying out loud.

I don’t want to be impressed by it. And I’m not. It’s just a car.

It’s the guy I’m sitting next to that I’m struggling not to be impressed by. I can’t believe he works at a home for the elderly. A small part of me is still waiting for him to pull up to some lookout, smile at me and say, “Just kidding about the old people thing. Let’s make out.”

As thrilling as that might be, it’ll score him a punch in the face.

I’m far more interested in the Holden who reads Catch Me If You Can and looks after the elderly on a Wednesday evening.

If the look on his face in the library was anything to go by, he wasn’t lying.

I steal a glance at him from the corner of my eye and notice the way he’s gripping the wheel. Looks like I’m not the only nervous one.

“So, what’s your grandpa’s name?”

Holden glances at me. “John.” He smiles. “He was always my favorite, you know. Dad’s parents were kind of aloof, I guess. They were older and couldn’t be bothered with kids by the time I came along. I never felt like I could relax at their place. Mom was always nervous that her boys would be too loud or break something. We just had to sit there and listen to adult conversation. Dinner was served on painted china and we got glared at if even one elbow was on the table.” He snickers. “It was just not a kid-friendly environment.”

“But your Grandpa John, he was different?”

“Oh, for sure. Mom’s parents were the ones who snuck us candy bars and took us someplace special any chance they could. We’d stay with them every summer and over Christmas. I loved going to their house.” A deep sadness sweeps over his expression and my chest constricts.

“I’m sorry things have changed,” I murmur.

Holden shrugs. “When Grandma died, he never got over it. That was about four years ago, and things have just gone downhill from there. Poor guy. I’m sure some days he just wants to die so he can be with her again.”

He clenches his jaw and grips the wheel a little tighter.

And things go quiet for a while.

I glance to my right and take in the sparse suburb. It’s not as nice as mine, but not as bad as the Derelict-ville we drove through when we first arrived. The streets around Armitage High are definitely the nicest. Holden’s place is just five minutes southeast of my house and it’s the most expensive street in town. There’s only like three houses in the little cul-de-sac, and they’re all lush. That’s what Rahn told me, anyway.

I didn’t realize being a mayor paid so well, but there it is. Holden’s dad must be making bank…or he came with plenty of money. It’s obvious in the way Holden dresses, and the car he drives. This red beast is a chick magnet, for sure.

Chloe thinks it’s the hottest car she’s ever seen.

Oh man, I’m so glad she’s busy tonight.

I waited until the locker rooms had cleared out. My sisters are used to me jogging home after practice and I told them not to wait for me today. Max looked almost happy with my request and said something about checking out a batting cage Kingston told her about, while Chloe said she was going to hang out with Rahn.

Problem solved.

It made the lying part easier, although the guilt didn’t weigh any less.

If she knew what I was doing right now, she’d flip. I tell myself it’s for her sake, but either way, she’ll hate it. She doesn’t want me checking up on Holden because she wants him to be perfect.

He’s not. I know that much.

I hold my breath and steal another glance at him. He catches my eye and grins. I whip around to look out the window, my insides skittering.

I’m so not here just to check that he’s good enough for Chloe.

I should seriously stop lying to myself and own it already.

But then if I do that, I’ll have to get out of this car and call everything off. I can’t fall for the guy Chloe’s into.

I’m a bad person.

But I’m also a curious one, so I grip the seat beneath me and keep my mouth shut.

“Wait on Me” by Rixton is filling up the silent space so it’s easy enough to stay quiet. I focus on the beat and chew the inside of my cheek, wondering how much longer it’ll be until we get there.

Holden reads my mind. “It’s about another five minutes.”

I glance at him and nod.

“They say it’s on the outskirts of town, but it’s basically outside of Armitage. I think they originally hoped to have some more development around it, but the town hasn’t exactly taken off, you know?”

“How long have you been here?”

“A few years.”

“Do you like it?”

“It’s okay. I’ve made some good friends. I like playing baseball. It’s not all bad.” Clearing his throat, Holden shuffles in his seat and hits the blinker.

I study his profile, wondering why he’s just lied to me. I thought he wanted to show me who he really was this evening. I guess the fake-it-till-you-make-it thing is ingrained.

We turn left into a gravel driveway and are soon pulling into the small parking lot outside Cresthill Home for the Elderly.

I look at the chipped cream sign with the blue lettering.

“Here we go.” Holden gives me a small smile. “You ready?”

With a short nod, I get out of the car and walk around to his side.

He glances down at me. Oh man, I love how tall he is. Patrick and I were basically the same height, so it was impossible to feel dainty around him. But Holden’s nearly half a head taller than me, and with his broad chest and muscly arms…

Placing his hand on my lower back, he leads the way forward. I shuffle beside him, taking in the green lawn to my left and the cobbled patio to my right. An old lady in a wheelchair is sitting by a white table, wrapped in a blanket and staring out ahead of her. I don’t know what she’s looking at but she seems kind of lost and bored.

“Hey, Mrs. Duggan,” Holden shouts past me and raises his hand in the air.

She jolts and turns towards him, squinting our direction and adjusting the glasses on her nose.

“I’ll just go say hi,” Holden murmurs before brushing past me and crouching down by her wheelchair. As soon as he’s within sight range the woman’s entire face lights with a smile.

She pats his cheek like he’s her sweet grandchild.

I’m not sure what he says to her, but she giggles and kisses his forehead. Holden grins, then stands and gently touches her shoulder before heading back to me.

“She’s a real sweetheart. She comes out here every fine night after dinner just to sit and feel the breeze on her skin. That’s what she says, anyway.” He smiles down at me before walking forward like he hasn’t just shown me a part of himself I never thought existed.

Blinking my surprised eyes, I head after him and walk up the ramp.

Holden holds the door for me and we step into a reception area.

“Hi, Natalie. How’s it going?”

“Oh, hey, Holden. Nice to see you.” The woman’s round face brightens with a smile before her curious gaze lands on me.

“This is my friend, Maddie. She’s going to help out tonight.”

“Oh, another volunteer! Wonderful.”

“Wait, you volunteer?” I spin to look at Holden. “I thought you worked here.”

He doesn’t have a chance to reply as Natalie starts going on about what a champion he is. “We’ve tried to employ him, but he just won’t have it. I don’t know what we’d do without this beautiful boy. The people here absolutely love you, Holden Carter.” She’s so enthusiastic.

He smiles and shakes his head, which only makes her laugh and roll her eyes at me. “He’ll learn to take a compliment one day.” She pats my arm with a friendly wink. “Welcome to Cresthill, sweetie.”

“Thank you.” I smile at her. “What can I do to help?”

“Stick with Holden, he knows what he’s doing. I’ll let him direct you.”

“Okay.” I nod and she turns to Holden.

“Carrie will let you know when it’s time to round them all up. A few of them are still finishing off their dinner.”

“Is my main man done?”

“Yes, sir. He’s back in his room already. He wasn’t very hungry tonight.” She gives Holden a pained smile.

He cringes and bobs his head. “Got it.” His smile is kind of sad and resigned. “Thanks, Natalie.” He winks at her and takes my hand, pulling me down the corridor.

His strong fingers wrapped around mine feel so good. I wish I could thread my fingers between his and give them a little squeeze. But it’s not my job to comfort him right now. I’m not his girlfriend.

It takes all my willpower, but I wriggle my hand free and soften the move with a smile. Holden doesn’t say anything, just shoves his hands into his jacket pockets.

My stomach clenches. It’d be so natural to walk through this new place holding his hand.

So natural…and so inappropriate.

Bunching my fingers, I shove them into my hoodie pockets and trail after Holden.

Cresthill smells like a mixture of cleaning agents and old people. I didn’t even know old people could have a smell, but they do.

My grandparents all passed away within about three years of each other. Grandma Barlow was the first to go. I was only seven at the time, and Dad took it pretty hard.

“So…” I clear my throat. “What exactly are we doing tonight?”

“Just helping out. I wheel these guys into the rec room for bingo and help them play the game. Sometimes I read to a couple of them as they wait for the nurses to come and help them get ready for bed. Other times we just sit and chat. Bingo night’s like rush hour, though. These guys are really into it.”

I glance at my watch. “What time do they play?”

“About six thirty.”

“And they’ve already had dinner? Wow, that’s early.”

Holden pauses outside a door to wink at me. “It’s the circle of life, right? They kind of end the way they began.”

I don’t have time to respond before Holden pushes the door open. “Hey, Grandpa.”

There’s a pause and then a shaky voice asks him, “Who are you?”

Holden’s jaw clenches, a sadness kind of washing over his expression before he pastes on a smile and steps into the room. “My name’s Holden.”

The man grunts. I peek my head inside the door to see what he looks like.

He’s a small, shriveled figure, sitting in an armchair by the window. He still has a full head of white hair, but his cheeks are sunken in and his shoulders are curved over.

I bet he used to be really handsome. I can tell by the shape of his jawline.

Holden takes a seat on the ottoman beside him and smiles. “So, how’s your day been?”

“Why do you want to know?” the old man grumbles.

“Because I’m interested.” Holden’s charm isn’t just a put-on. I can see that it oozes out of him naturally too. He doesn’t need to impress a man who keeps forgetting who he is; he’s just being kind…being real.

A small part of me (okay, a huge part) can’t help liking him just a little bit more.

“Who’s that?” The man suddenly points at me.

I step into the room and raise my hand in a wave. “Hi. I’m Maddie.”

He grunts again, still pointing at me. “You’re a looker.”

I blush. “Thank you.”

Holden chuckles. “John, this is my friend from school.”

“Girlfriend?” His voice is gruff and short.

Holden looks at me as if somehow hopeful before shaking his head. “Just a friend.”

“You need to make her your girlfriend.”

Holden smiles and winks at his grandpa. “I’m working on it.”

I throw Holden a horrified look but my expression is washed away when Grandpa John suddenly bursts with laughter, grabbing Holden’s hand and slapping it. “Smart boy. You’re a smart boy. I used to know a boy just like you.”

Holden gives him a weak smile like he’s heard it all before, then plays along as his grandfather goes on to tell a story about a boy who sounds just like Holden. He was a little rascal, always trying to keep up with his two older brothers and getting into trouble along the way. It’s obvious that Holden was John’s favorite grandson—the youngest of the brood, the one he had a special connection with. If I read deep enough between the lines, I can’t help wondering if John was trying to protect Holden from an ambitious father who was too caught up in his work, and a mother who was only just coping with her three sons.

I take a tentative seat on the edge of the bed and listen in, my heart melting at the tender way Holden holds his grandfather’s hand and listens like it’s the best story he’s ever heard.

“I need to tell Dottie that we have go see him again. You go get her for me, son. Tell her we need to get going.”

Holden holds his breath for a moment and then croaks, “Dottie’s out right now.”

“What?” John frowns, his voice rising swiftly. “She didn’t tell me she was leaving.”

“She’ll be back soon,” Holden replies calmly. “As soon as she walks in the door, she’ll come down and see you.”

This calms John a little. “You tell her I want to go see my boy.”

“I’ll do that.”

“He’s turning five soon. He’s getting big and I don’t want to miss out.”

“You won’t,” Holden murmurs.

My eyes start to burn as I take in the expression on his face. Clenching my jaw, I will the tears not to surface. Holden glances my way and I smile at him. I can understand why he wants to keep this quiet. I can’t imagine Luke or any of the Pitbulls understanding this.

“All right, time to get ready for bingo,” a young female voice calls from the hallway.

I glance at my watch again. It’s still thirty minutes away.

“By the time we get everyone into the rec room…” Holden raises his eyebrows and smiles. “Let’s just say it can take a while.”

My head bobs with understanding as Holden starts getting John ready to go.

“But Dottie’s not back yet. We can’t go to bingo without her. She loves that game.”

Holden cringes behind John’s back.

“I’m staying here until she arrives.”

“Grandpa, you don’t want to miss the start of the game. Why don’t we—”

“I’m not leaving!” He hits the arm of his chair, lifting his chin with a stubborn defiance.

Holden’s expression bunches before he lets out a sigh and looks at me. “We can go get the others first. By the time we’re done with that, he may have forgotten.”

“I’m not forgetting anything, boy! I’m waiting for my wife!”

“That’s okay.” I smile at John, crouching down beside his chair. “That’s a really sweet thing to do. You know, I bet she’s just running a little late. We could go to the rec room and wait for her there.”

John’s face bunches with confusion. “I don’t like the number ten.”

I glance at Holden, surprised by the sudden turn in the conversation. Holden shrugs like it’s nothing new, but he still doesn’t know what to do.

“What’s wrong with the number ten?”

He frowns. “I always get it and I never win bingo. Dottie wants me to win. She likes winning.”

“I’ll tell you what.” I lean up to whisper in his ear. “I’ll check every card and make sure yours doesn’t have a ten.”

John’s lips twitch when I stand back and grin at him. He wags his finger at me. “I like you.”

“I like you, too.” My smile grows a little wider.

“Dottie loves me.” His voice shakes with emotion.

“Oh, I know she does.”

My heart cracks just a little as I watch his blue eyes start to shimmer. It’s like deep down, under all that confusion, he knows she’s not here anymore. His heart is trying to tell him something he doesn’t want to hear.

“Shall we go play?” I take his hand and help him up. He’s heavier than he looks and Holden jumps in to give me a hand, steadying us both before leading the way.

It’s slowgoing down to the rec room. John has gotten it into his head that we’re going outside of the facility to play and keeps asking if he’s dressed okay. I assure him the whole way there, keeping up the charade, as that’s obviously the best way to manage him.

A nurse I haven’t met yet winks at me when I pass the nurse’s station and mouths, “You’re doing great.”

I give her a weak smile and keep going, following Holden as he wheels a lady into the rec room. She’s chatting away like he’s her best friend. He’s taking it all in stride, charming her with a few witty one-liners that make her giggle.

“He likes to sit over there.” Holden points to John’s usual spot and I walk him across to the rectangular table. They've been set out in rows facing up to a small platform where Natalie is getting ready with her spinning wheel full of balls.

John takes a seat and looks down the table. “Who are these people?”

I hold my breath, wondering how to respond, then bend down and whisper in his ear. “These are your friends. You’re going to be playing with them tonight.”

He shuffles in his seat, eyeing them warily.

The guy to his right pats his hand and grins. “It’s okay, Johnny-Boy. We’re going to have a good time.”

“Where’s Dottie going to sit with all these fellas in the way?”

“Oh.” I look around me and see a stack of chairs against the wall. Grabbing the top one, I place it at the end of the table. “She can sit here.”

The kind man beside us looks over John’s head and gives me a wink, then starts chatting about football while I chase after Holden.

We spend the next thirty minutes wheeling and walking people into the rec room. Most of them look to be in their eighties, physically struggling with life as their bodies slowly break down.

There’s another younger woman who’s obviously struggling mentally. She shouts a few things out across the rec room as cards and pencils are handed out.

“Hush now, Sally. You’re okay.” A nurse rubs her shoulder and places a card in front of her.

I hover nearby, wondering what I’m supposed to do next.

The nurse turns to me with a sweet smile and holds out her hand. “Hi, I'm Carrie. Thank you so much for coming. Having extra volunteers really frees up the staff to catch up on other jobs.” She grins while I shake her hand.

“So, what do you want me to do?”

“Just cruise around the room helping people find their numbers. A lot of these guys struggle with either sight or hearing. Sometimes both.”

“Okay.” I bob my head and give her a brave smile.

She pats my arm. “You’re going to be great. Just copy Holden, he’s a pro at bingo night.”

With a little chuckle, she walks out of the room just as Natalie starts up the game.

I scan the room for Holden and find him just behind me.

“Myra and Luanne often need help,” he whispers in my ear and points over my shoulder to a couple of tiny ladies two rows in front of me.

“Okay.” I glance at him, trying to put on a brave front.

“Don’t worry. They’re sweethearts.” He gently rubs my back. “And you’re doing great.”

His wink makes my insides shudder, and part of me wants to curse the power of that little eye move. No wonder Chloe’s fallen under his spell so easily.

I head over to Myra and pull up the chair beside the wall. “Hi.”

The poor woman squints at me. “What, dear?”

I lean forward and speak a little louder. “I just said hi, I’m Maddie.”

“Mattie? Isn’t that a boy’s name?”

“Madelyn,” I clarify with a smile.

“Oh, well, isn’t that pretty.” Her wrinkled, bony hand pats the top of mine as she shakily picks up her pencil.

“B25,” Natalie calls across the room.

Myra squints and leans her ear towards the stage.

I lean in and repeat, “B25.”

“B.” She looks at me, then down at the paper, her hand quivering like she’s holding a jackhammer. I scan the page and find column B, pointing to it so she can then scan down for the number 25.

I spot it in the middle, but I’m not sure how much to help her. Will she be offended if I do it for her?”

“Oh, I can’t see it,” the woman beside Myra murmurs in distress.

“Don’t you worry yourself, Luanne. This young lady here’s going to help you.”

I pop up from my seat and stand between them, able to scan the page and tell Luanne she doesn’t have that combination before Natalie draws another ball.

And the next forty minutes of my life screams by in a flash as I jump from those two sweet ladies to the gentleman behind me, then down a row to a woman who kissed me on the cheek when she got a row.

It was Mrs. Duggan.

I seriously never knew people could get so excited over bingo.

It’s adorable.

I totally understand why Holden must love coming here. These people are so sweet: some of them wise, some of them funny, some of them in a constant state of dazed confusion.

I bend down so Myra can say another thank you before she’s wheeled away by Carrie. Standing tall, I move to help Luanne to her room, but stop when I see Holden next to an elderly man. He’s gently wiping some dribble from the man’s face and making a joke that has the guy’s quivering lips rising into a smile. He pats Holden’s cheek with a trembling hand, treating the most popular jock at high school like he’s a precious wonder.

Yet another one under his spell.

“He’s a catch, that one.” Mrs. Duggan gives me a knowing smile as she’s wheeled past. Natalie chuckles and bobs her head in agreement.

I don’t say anything, but I know they’re right.

Holden Carter may put on a big show for the students at Armitage High, but what I’m seeing right now is something else entirely, and I’d have to be an idiot not to realize what an effect it’s having on me.

I like this Holden.

I like him a lot.