I stood in front of the mirror and wiped off the fog from my shower. Staring at my reflection, I saw someone unfamiliar to me. Unrecognizable. A shadow of the man I used to be.

Anyone looking at me would never know the loneliness that lived inside. The desperation that had carved itself a spot and made a permanent home where my heart used to lay. But I knew because I struggled with it on a daily basis. It taunted me every day and refused to let me forget about the hollowness surrounding me.

I worked out often, and it showed in my physique. On the outside, I appeared to be well put together. My dirty-blond hair was always kept short, neat, never long enough to be considered unruly. I trimmed my close-cut beard every morning—weekends included. During the week, I sported business-men ties and pressed pants, wore shoes that shined, and I carried a briefcase.

Professional.

Composed.

But looks can be deceiving.

Staring at myself now, I noticed how dull my blue eyes had become. No longer vibrant and full of life. I’d spent so long paying attention and pouring everything into Gabi that I hadn’t seen the effects her depression had on me. The toll it’d taken on me.

I ran my hand over my scruff, the same place Eden had touched me earlier, and tried to remember what it felt like when Gabi used to scratch the short hairs. I fought to recall the feel of her hands on me, the way her breath used to warm the skin on my neck when we’d curl up together, even if only to watch a silly movie. I could no longer remember in vivid detail what it was like to be with her intimately. Instead, all I could feel was Eden’s hand on my face, her breath on my lips, her legs around my waist.

It disgusted me.

Giving up on the self-deprecating thoughts, I turned off the bathroom light and went to the bedroom. Gabi was already asleep, on her side facing away from me, so I carefully climbed beneath the covers to keep from disturbing her. But the longer I lay there, the worse my desperation became. I needed her, and I knew she needed me.

Something had to give.

Rolling onto my side to face her, I wrapped my arm around her waist. I no longer cared if I woke her or not. I wanted her awake. I needed her voice, her touch, her lips on mine.

Depression affects more than the person struggling with it. It reaches out its talons and hooks everyone close—and I was tired of being ripped apart by it.

I hauled her into me. Her back met my chest and warmth instantly flooded me. It was as if I’d been locked outside in the cold without a jacket, and then came inside to sit by the fire. Comforting. But it didn’t last long. She stirred and fought against my hold until I finally relented, letting her roll onto her stomach with her face buried into her pillow.

And the frosty chill returned.

I stared at the ceiling, knowing something had to give. A woman—a stranger—had made me smile, made me laugh, and I had enjoyed it. I craved it more than I thought possible. And I needed more of it. But there was a line I couldn’t cross, a point at which it was wrong. Sadly, I wasn’t sure I knew where that line was.

The darkness took over while I contemplated it all. I loved Gabi, more than anything else in the world. However, at some point, I had to learn how to put myself first when needed. Only, I didn’t think it possible to ever put myself before her. She wasn’t whole. She wasn’t in a place where she was capable of taking care of herself.

Gabi moaned in her sleep—a sound I hadn’t heard in ages. She became restless, flipping her head from side to side until she settled and faced me. Her eyes opened and a smile lilted her lips. It was the most beautiful sight I’d ever seen.

She slowly removed her arm out from beneath her and stretched it out to lay her hand on my bare chest. The heat from her palm flowed through me like the rays of the sun at noon.

“Hey,” I whispered, completely unsure of how to act. Everything had been so difficult between us lately, and the last thing I wanted to do was scare her off or upset her somehow. I could upset her without even meaning to.

Her smile grew wider while she blinked at me. “Hey,” she repeated in a sleepy voice, almost scratchy. “I missed you.”

My chest grew heavy, as if the weight of the world settled on it, and a sigh escaped. Relief flooded me, as well as complete and utter joy. “I missed you, too, baby.”

She softly ran her nails over my skin and scooted closer. “Make love to me. I need you, Dane. I love you so much. Please, make love to me.” The way she asked made it sound as though she were begging, although she never needed to. I’d do anything for her, and she knew it.

I rolled into her, forcing her onto her back, and then covered her body with mine. The feel of her beneath me was something I’d longed for. Craved. Needed more than air to breathe. She was my oxygen, and I realized I’d been suffocating without her.

Her lips were soft, her tongue warm. She wrapped her arms around my neck and held me against her. This could go on forever. The feel of her warm skin on my hands filled me with life, and the sounds of her desire urged me on.

In an instant, she lay beneath me naked, her body bare for me to appreciate. To love. To worship like my life depended on it. She wrapped her legs around my waist and locked her ankles together to keep me there, like she’d always done, as if she were afraid I’d disappear. But it was her I was scared would vanish…more so than she already had.

I filled her and swallowed her approval. She felt like heaven. Like home. Like all was right in the world. Her nails dug into my skin and urged me on. I couldn’t get enough of this woman.

“Dane…” she whispered into the quiet room.

I pulled away, needing to see her face. I had to make sure she wasn’t crying, because it’d been so long since I’d seen her eyes without the sheen of tears lining them. But what I saw beneath me made me stop everything. The world quit spinning and all the air had been sucked from my lungs.

Instead of wide, brown eyes, I was met with the darkest shade of green I’d ever seen. Rather than the dry, cracked lips I’d spent so long staring at, longing for, I found perfectly plump ones painted red, curled into a heart-stopping grin.

I sat back, not understanding what had happened. I was with Gabi, making love to Gabi…but beneath me lay Eden. Bare. Smiling up at me.

She reached out and held my face. “Don’t stop, Dane. Keep going.”

I glanced down and realized I was still inside her. Although, her body was nothing but a blur. I could see she was naked, but other than that, I couldn’t make out any features.

“I can’t…” I tried to get away from her, but I couldn’t. I was frozen, unable to move.

“I want to make you happy, Dane. Let me make you smile and laugh. You deserve that much.”

Before I could respond, a buzzer sounded somewhere far off, but loud enough to echo in my head. My thoughts became fuzzy, my limbs tingly and heavy, and then finally, I opened my eyes, realizing it’d all been a dream. A dream I didn’t care to dissect.

On my way into work, I stopped by the front desk and immediately earned a welcoming smile from Gina. There was a reason I’d given her this position. No one could come into this office and feel like shit after a smile from her. It helped when clients came to me, on the brink of losing their companies, and were greeted so warmly.

“Morning, Gina. Have you by chance seen a young woman come in? Red hair?”

“The one from yesterday?” She drew her brows together in thought. “I haven’t seen her yet. But you know no one comes in before you. Do you want me to give her a message or call you when she arrives?”

I tapped the desk and stepped away. “No, but thank you,” I said as I left her and headed for my office.

I had a lot of work to catch up on after skipping out so early yesterday. My inbox was full and so was the stack of missed call memos. The light on my desk phone blinked, alerting me to voicemails I needed to retrieve. But I couldn’t focus on anything other than my dream.

Shortly after sitting down at my desk, a soft knock came from the door to the adjoining room—Eden’s office. My heart raced and my palms grew clammy. I couldn’t understand it.

Eden opened the door but didn’t make a move to come in. “I’m sorry to bother you, but I don’t know what I should be doing.” She offered a shy smile.

I took a moment to appreciate her. She had her hair down and in loose curls that hung past her shoulders. Her makeup was light, like yesterday for her interview. Black pants and high heels made her legs appear to go on for miles—long, curvy miles. And a light sweater covered her arms. For some reason, I found myself yearning to see her ink.

“Can we talk?” My voice practically got stuck in my throat, coming out hoarse and gravelly. I cleared it away and tried again, pointing to the chair in front of my desk. “Please, Eden, take a seat.”

With her hands clasped in front of her, she did as I asked and walked toward me, meekly.

“About last night—”

“No,” she said with a stern shake of her head, interrupting me. “Please, let’s not go there. It’s embarrassing enough not talking about it. I’d prefer if we pretended it didn’t happen.”

“I just need to explain.”

“There’s nothing to explain. I made a move I shouldn’t have, and you led me to believe you were available…which you shouldn’t have. No need to make ourselves look more foolish than we already do.”

“It wasn’t that I didn’t plan on telling you.” I ignored her protests and decided to explain anyway. I needed to get it off my chest. “You made me laugh, and to be honest, I’d forgotten what that felt like. I had hoped to hold onto it a little longer. This…” I wagged my finger in the air between us. “This is what I didn’t want to happen. Things changed. You’re acting differently. I’m acting differently. And all I cared about was continuing to laugh.” My breathing grew deep and my voice quieted down. “I didn’t want to stop living.”

She didn’t say a word. She sat there and stared at me as her face softened and her eyes grew wide. Her tongue peeked out from between her lips as she licked them and all I could do was stare. I couldn’t believe I had blurted all that out. It wasn’t my intention. But regardless, I’d opened myself up for the first time in years.

“I don’t know how else to act. Yesterday, you were some random guy I had met at a bar the night before. Last night, you were…” She shook her head and wrung her hands in her lap. “And today you’re my boss. With all due respect, Mr. Kauffmann, things would’ve changed regardless.”

“Dane. Everyone here calls me by my first name.”

She nodded but didn’t correct herself. “I would really like to get to work, but I don’t know what you need me to do. Is there some kind of training I should start on?”

“Dane,” I repeated. “Call me Dane.”

I couldn’t explain it, but I needed some sort of normalcy with her. It was a ridiculous notion, considering I’d only known her for a little over a day, and honestly, I didn’t know her at all.

“Is there something for me to do, Dane?”

The uneasiness was still there, but I could tell she was trying. The corner of her lip quirked up into the slightest smirk, and her tone held a note of teasing.

“Sure is, Eden.” I gave in to my own grin and settled a bit. “As you already know, when companies are faced with bankruptcy or closing, they call me. I go in and help them change things in order for them to stay open and operating, and for them to understand how to keep doing so successfully. I invest money into the company and hold the decision-making authority. I pretty much buy the business for a limited amount of time.”

She kept her eyes on me, her nod urging me along as I spoke.

“I do this, in the event the company doesn’t succeed, to prevent the owners from selling off its parts and pocketing the profit. If that happens and the organization needs to be chopped up and sold off, any remaining profit goes to the employees. But that’s only happened a handful of times. I pick and choose which companies I bail out for that reason. I won’t take on one that’s too far gone. And my payout at the end of the contract is based upon my initial investment, plus the success of the company. That’s where you come in.”

I waited for her acknowledgment before continuing.

“I have too many prospective options coming in for me to research them all on my own. I outsourced that part once, but it ended up screwing me in the end, telling me ventures were solid returns when they weren’t. I was taking on companies with far too many risks, and it cost me too much money. I won’t make that mistake again.”

“Should I be taking notes?”

I chuckled under my breath and shook my head. “I currently have a department that weeds out the good from the bad and sends me a list of the ones that pass initial inspection. Even that list is too extensive and time-consuming for me to shuffle through alone. I need your help graphing them, charting them, showing me risk factors and where the money flow is. I need extensive information on the organization, starting at its inception. I need statistics and data that a Google search can’t provide. Can you handle that?”

“Absolutely.” Her eyes brightened and her smile lit up the room. As soon as I’d begun to discuss her duties and my expectations, her disposition had changed. For the better. She now exuded confidence, and that was exactly what I’d hoped for.

Feeling invigorated, I grabbed a file from my desk drawer and passed it to her. I had already gone over the information inside, but I was interested to see the conclusions she’d come up with. It was one I had discarded due to the blatant risk factors. From the cover, it looked like a pretty solid business. I called these jumpers—the ones you jump on quickly because they were smart investments. But once I dove into the owners’ personal backgrounds, the risks became too high and the red flags were glaringly evident.

I knew it would take her all day to digest the information I’d handed over. I decided to use it as a way to test her to see what she would find, how long she’d spend on it, and ultimately, what decision she’d come up with. Her transcript from NYU was impressive, but I had hired people with impressive résumés before, only to learn later their intelligence didn’t transfer from college to the real world. But I knew what Eden had to offer and that’s why I’d hired her. Just like I knew which companies to take on. Gut instinct. Now I was interested to see if my gut instinct was right where Eden was concerned. And the only way I’d be able to tell was by analyzing what she returned to me and advised me was a wise investment.

Eden was in her office when I went to lunch, and she was still in the same place an hour later when I returned. In fact, she never left her desk until almost four o’clock. I’d seen her on the computer and the phone throughout the day. I thought about interrupting her a few times, but quickly decided against it. I didn’t coddle any of my other associates, and I wouldn’t start with her.

She knocked on the door between our offices and opened it, not waiting for a response. However, she didn’t come in. She remained in the doorway with the folder clutched tightly to her chest.

“That was fast. I wasn’t expecting you to come up with a decision so soon.” I motioned her over to my desk and invited her to take a seat.

“So soon? I’ve been working on it all day,” she teased. “Although, I was able to learn faster ways of looking things up, so hopefully, it won’t take me as long in the future.”

I took the folder and opened it, acting as if I were poring over the details of the company. “Appears to be a good choice, doesn’t it?” I asked, baiting her.

“Yes, it does.”

I won’t lie, her answer was a little disappointing and my heart began to sink.

“However, I don’t think you should do it.”

That got my attention. “Oh, yeah? And why is that?”

“Well, although it seems like a good choice on the surface, I started digging into the Johnson brothers—the ones who bought the company a few years ago. They both struck it big at a casino and used their winnings to buy the established firm. The corporation itself is what’s making it seem like a perfect idea because it’s amazing. Great idea, fabulous business plan, dedicated employees…however, the new owners…not so much. I would have had this to you right after lunch, but I was waiting on a call. I just got it and it confirmed my suspicions. The problem is the way they obtained the company in the first place. With their winnings, and they’ve never stopped gambling. Now they’ve been gambling with bigger wages. And even though I can’t solidly prove it’s the firm’s money, I don’t think it’s a safe investment. Too risky.”

I was stunned into silence. She managed to find all this out in less than a day. It was impressive, but I was too shocked to offer much of a response. For some reason, she seemed nervous as she waited for my reaction.

“Was my decision all right?”

“All right? It’s fucking perfect. I’d already canceled this one out last week, but I was curious to see what you’d say. I’ve gotta tell you, Eden, you had me scared when you first came in with the file. But I’ll admit, I’m an extremely smart man for hiring you.”

She finally laughed. “Yes, let’s go ahead and give you all the credit for my hard work.”

“What? You didn’t know that’s what would happen when you took the job?”

“You’re very right, Dane. You’re a smart man to hire such a talented, brilliant, hard-working woman such as myself,” she teased, and it lightened my spirits.

“Good job today, Clare.”

“Thanks, Kauffmann.”

“Go ahead and go home for the day. I’m getting ready to leave, too. It was a good first day. You know, once we got past the morning.” I smiled, as did she. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

She stood and began to return to her office when another thought crossed my mind.

“Oh, and…Eden?” I waited for her to face me again. “You really don’t listen to me, do you? I told you to not cover your ink and to keep in your piercings. Yet you took them out and you’re wearing a sweater.”

“It’s not professional,” she responded, as if it were obvious.

My brows pinched together and I blinked a few times, expressing my confusion. I made a show of my arms, the parts that were visible with my sleeves rolled up. “Clearly, my company doesn’t follow the same idea of professionalism you seem to think. If the founder wears his ink proudly, then so should you. You are my sidekick, by the way.”

She giggled and glanced at the floor.

“And fuck what people say is professional. I like the Monroe and the nose stud. From now on, it’s part of your uniform. Come in without it again and I’ll send you home.”

She nervously played with her large curls draping over her shoulder. I must’ve made her uncomfortable because she turned quiet again.

“That wasn’t me hitting on you. That was nothing more than me giving you a compliment.”

“I know.” She met my stare and offered an uneasy grin before turning to go to her office.

I eyed the closed door that separated us and knew I was ready to accept the changes that lay ahead. Handing over some of the decision-making wouldn’t be easy, but I had a feeling Eden would make things easier.

And in addition, I had an inkling that Eden would also make things more complicated.