Adrenaline shot through my veins like quicksilver. Maya’s voice came to me as if she were underwater. She clawed at me as I jammed the SUV into gear and hit the gas. She fumbled with the lock on the passenger door but I had it set so she couldn’t open it. Even if she could, I’d hit sixty miles per hour as I hit the backstreets. Thank God there was no traffic to impede me. I checked the rearview mirror. We drew some stares from pedestrians on the boardwalk when my tires squealed, but nobody was following us.

I settled back into the seat and exhaled. Now I just had to deal with Maya. She buried her face in her hands and let out a wail that tore at my heart.

“Baby,” I said. “I’m not going to hurt you. Let me explain.”

She drew her hands away from her face. From my periphery I could see her eyes turn dark. The color drained from her face as she turned toward me.

“You’re a monster,” she said. “You’ve been lying to me from the very beginning. Was this fun for you? What was I, Axle? Huh? You figured you’d get your kicks in and fuck me for a while before you finished Junior’s dirty work?”

Her words stabbed through me. Of course, that’s what she thought. Why wouldn’t she? God. The pain in her voice tore at me. I’d give anything to be able to take her in my arms and make her understand. Except I didn’t know how I would. I’d only thought far enough to get her the hell off the street.

“Maya,” I said, weaving through the traffic we did hit as I made the turn along the coast toward Port Az. I wasn’t taking her there though. We had a safe house just outside of town. If I could convince her to stay there with me, we had a shot at putting an end to this by the end of the day. “I know you have every reason to hate me. But I’m trying to save your life.”

A truck stopped in the middle of the road right in front of me. I hit the brakes and swerved to avoid it. Maya struck. She reached over me and tried to get to the controls for the door locks. She was like a wild animal, her eyes wide. Her face glistened with sweat. Keeping one hand on the wheel, I took her wrist with the other, turning my body to keep her from reaching what she sought.

She clawed at me, scratching her nails down the side of my face. Heat poured from the cut she made. But I deserved it. I deserved all of it. Though it killed me to think it, she could hate me forever as long as she was still alive.

The truck moved to the side of the road and I hit the gas pedal again. Maya sank back into the passenger seat, her tears finally falling.

I smashed my palm against the steering wheel as we picked up speed again. “I need you to trust me,” I said, knowing she probably never would again.

“Fuck you, Axle,” she said, her voice low and ragged.

I took another hairpin curve. It pushed Maya against the passenger side door. “Put your seatbelt on,” I yelled.

“Why?” she yelled. “Won’t that make your job easier? Just do it, Axle. Do it.”

“Do what?” I said, turning to her as we hit a straightaway.

“Kill me. That’s what you’re here for. That’s what you’ve always been here for.”

Clenching my jaw, I gripped the steering wheel harder and took the last turn. Now we hit the rural highway. We had the plains on either side with the Gulf in the distance. The road had been newly paved, the bright yellow center stripe stretched in front of us and disappeared into the horizon. My heartbeat settled. The worst of the danger was over now that I’d gotten her out of sight. Except to Maya, she thought the opposite was true. Where I saw salvation, she saw despair. She let out a whimper that twisted my heart. I couldn’t take her pain for another second.

I took the SUV up to one hundred miles an hour. I would have given anything to have been able to ride her out on the back of my bike. There might be time for that later, if she could ever bring herself to forgive me.

“Do it,” she said again. She pressed her hands against the dashboard, bracing herself against the thing she feared. God. I’d done this. I’d put terror in her heart when all I wanted to do was shield her from all of it.

“Axle.” She pleaded with me. I slowed the car and turned to look at her. “Please. Just do it.”

She buried her face in her hands and my heart splintered into a million pieces. I checked the rearview mirror. There was no one behind us, no cars coming from either direction. Ahead, the road curved back toward the beach. I took my foot off the gas and pulled to the side of the road.

My breath came hard and I pressed my forehead against the steering wheel. Then I reached over and unlocked the passenger door. Maya lifted her head. Her eyes went wide. I opened my door and got out. Maya gutted me as she sat in the car, trembling. She wouldn’t come out. I went around to her side; standing in the berm, I opened her door.

“Maya,” I said, trying to make my voice gentle, but I realized it was futile. I knew what I was. I knew what she saw. She saw a monster in leather and ink. I held out my hand. “Baby, come on.”

Finally, Maya turned to me. Her tears had dried and stony resolve came over her face. She stared at me with those sharp green eyes. Her nostrils flared but she didn’t falter. She straightened her back, took my hand, and stepped out of the car.

I took a step back. A flat, barren strip of land stretched in front of me. I tore a hand through my hair and turned my back to Maya. I walked a few steps away from the car before I finally turned back. Maya stood there next to the car, staring at me, her expression mixed with confusion and a little bit of fear.

“Yes,” I finally yelled, taking a step toward her. “You’re right about who I am. The club works for the DiSalvos. Junior wants you dead. I was supposed to make that happen.”

Her lips pursed into a bloodless line but Maya didn’t move.

“You probably won’t believe anything else I tell you, but I’m going to tell you anyway. Everything I’ve ever told you about myself … it was the truth. You changed everything, Maya. You are everything. I was willing to walk away from all of it for you. I still am.”

“You’re a liar. How can you expect me to believe anything that comes out of your mouth?” she said, her voice low and toneless.

“I can’t,” I said, throwing up my hands. “But the minute I found out you were the witness, I’ve tried to keep you safe. I couldn’t do it. Do you get that? Do you know who I am? Who I really am?”

She put her hands on the top of her head as if she couldn’t hold all of this inside it. Like it would pop off at any moment. I knew the feeling. Then her shoulders went lax and she covered her hands with her face.

Maya broke.

She sank to her knees, sobbing. My world shifted on its axis. It was as if everything that had been solid beneath my feet had churned and swirled, becoming liquid. I thought I knew who I was. I thought I had a path. A gift. That gift was death and loyalty to the club.

Maya Ballard had changed it all.

But as I stood there, I realized she hadn’t really. I was the one who had changed. Or rather, she’d peeled back layers of armor and steel. Everything I’d built up to protect myself and justify the choices I made. It was gone. All that was left was my beating heart. She’d made that raw too.

Without her, I couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t see. I knew at that moment that nothing else mattered but this woman and what I’d done to her. I could never make it right.

I went to her. I stood before her as her shoulders wracked with sobs.

“Maya,” I said, though my voice sounded distant and unfamiliar. “God. Maya. Please. I love you.”

Her whole body flinched at the words. She stiffened then slowly rose to her feet. Her tears were gone. Her eyes seared through me, her expression raw and filled with pain.

“I love you.” I said it again.

Maya shook her head. “I can’t.”

“No one is ever going to hurt you again,” I said. “Not Junior, not Langley. Nobody. I swear to you. It’s what I came to tell you.”

She just kept shaking her head. But something flickered behind Maya’s eyes. Maybe it was arrogant of me to think it, but I knew in my heart that she wasn’t all the way lost to me. I couldn’t allow it. I couldn’t.

“You’re a liar,” she said through a sob. “That’s all you’ve ever been.”

“I’ve told you the truth,” I said. “I’ve risked everything to keep you safe. But now, it’s not just me. You have the club’s protection too. We’re going to make it so Junior can never come near you again.”

“Liar!”

Her voice was brittle and it eviscerated me. In desperation, I gave her the one thing I knew she thought she didn’t have. Control.

Before I could even think it through, I unholstered my Nine. She made a strangled sound and took a step back. I flipped the gun, pointing the handle toward her. I reached for her. She tried to pull away but I was too strong. I took her right hand and closed it around the gun, fitting her fingers over the trigger.

I made her point it at me and stepped into it, so the barrel was pointing at my chest, straight over my heart.

“Do it,” I said. “If it’s the only way I can earn your trust. If it’s the only way you’ll feel safe.”

“Axle,” she cried.

“It won’t matter,” I said. “You already have my heart. I’ll do whatever I have to prove it to you. I love you. Do you hear me? I love you. I can’t live without you anymore so do what you have to do.”

I took my hands off hers. She wavered for a moment, but held the gun steady. Tears streamed down her face as she held it how I’d aimed it, straight at my heart. I spread my arms wide, making myself vulnerable to her. I dropped to my knees, keeping my hands out, palms toward her.

“No,” she cried.

“You just have to pull the trigger,” I said.

“I hate you,” she said, but the rage had left her voice, growing softer.

“I love you,” I said again. I’d say it a million times. I knew right then, no matter when my life ended, if it was a moment from now or in fifty years, those would be the last words I would ever say and my final thoughts. “I love you, Maya.” I said it again in a thick whisper.

“Why?” she asked. She held the gun steady, as her tears started to flow again.

“I didn’t know,” I said. “I didn’t know I was going to fall in love with you. By the time I did, it was too late. Tell me it’s not too late.”

Maya wiped her eyes with her shoulder. I stayed prone in front of her.

“I should,” she said. “I wanted to. I heard you last night talking to Zig and Benz in the barn. Did they come there to kill me?”

“No! They came there for me. God, Maya. I was never going to hurt you. If I was, you never would have seen it coming.”

A bit of the rage came back into her eyes, making them glint. “I never saw you coming, Axle. I told you. I always do the right thing. You were the wrong thing and I knew it. I knew it from the second I saw you in that fucking bar. But I didn’t care.”

I couldn’t help it, even now she made me smile. “I didn’t care either,” I said. “I only knew I needed you in my life. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I may not have much, but it’s all for you, baby. My heart, my soul, my body, my protection. I’ll lay it all at your feet every single day.”

She sniffed hard and wiped the sweat from her brow with one hand and held the gun steady with the other. “I hate you, Axle Hart,” she said. “Do you know that?”

I let out a hard breath. “You should. You should just fucking shoot me. I don’t deserve you. But God help us both, I don’t care. I want you. You’re the only thing that matters.”

She looked toward the sky. “I hate you. You should have told me the truth.”

“You would have run. You would have put yourself in danger. I know I hurt you, but what I did, I did to protect you, and I’d do it again.”

“I hate you.” She said it again. Her tone had changed. The rage left it. In its place, she was raw and broken just like I was. She’d remade something inside of me and as Maya stood there on the side of the road with my life and heart in her hands, something reknit in her too.

The light came back in her eyes along with the tears. She stopped running. She stopped fighting. There was nothing between us now but the truth.

“I love you,” I said it again and again. “I need you. Look at me, baby. Look at me. You know the truth. You know every breath I’ve taken with you was real. All of it. You know the truth.”

She let out a strangled sob and I recognized it as the last of her anger. She looked toward the sky as the last of her tears fell. Her shoulders dropped and she finally met my eyes again. God, she was so beautiful. Even with her eyes red from crying and her hair wild in the wind, she was everything.

“I still hate you,” she whispered, but this time, she smiled when she said it. “But God help me, I’m in love with you.”

I finally dropped my hands. A silence rose between us. One beat. Two. Then there was nothing else to do but laugh. Maya’s eyes went wide, then her shoulders shook with soft laughter too.

“You broke my heart,” she said.

“You helped me find mine, baby,” I said. “I swear to God, I’ll never lie to you again. I don’t know where we go from here, but as long as you’re with me, I don’t care.”

“Get up,” she said. “I don’t like holding this thing. Plus, I’m probably a terrible shot.”

I put my hands down. “I’ll consider myself lucky then,” I said. Her hands trembled and I reached for the gun.

“It’d be just your luck I shoot your ass anyway,” she said, sighing. “Now would you please get off your knees and take this thing?” She held the gun out. God, I just wanted to spend the rest of my life kissing this woman.

An engine roared behind me and Maya’s eyes flicked to the road. The air sizzled with a crack and heat blossomed in my shoulder. Terror filled Maya’s face as she looked at the gun in her hand then back at me.

I staggered sideways as blood rushed through me. Pain tore into me as Maya dropped the gun.