“Where the fuck is she?” I growl into the phone, panic seizing my chest.
“Where is who?” Amber seems so confused that I almost believe she has no idea what I’m talking about—almost.
“You know who? Don’t fucking play games with me. I know Rae called you,” I bite, trying my best to keep my anger, which is only a product of my fear, in check.
“Honestly, Gabe. I have no idea what the hell you’re talking about. Is Rae okay? What’s going on?”
“When’s the last time you spoke to her?” I get out through gritted teeth.
“I don’t know, like two or three hours ago.”
“Did she say anything to you?”
“What’s going on?” she asks again, worry evident in her voice.
“I came home about twenty minutes ago, and she’s not here. I searched the house only to find all of her and Landen’s stuff gone. I’m not sure why she would just leave without at least talking to me.” I pinch the bridge of my nose between my thumb and index finger.
“Wait. What?” she blurts.
It’s becoming clearer to me that she truly has no idea where Rae is or why she left.
“When I talked to her a while ago she seemed fine. She didn’t mention anything to me about leaving. In fact, we discussed me coming to visit in a few days. Did something happen?” she asks.
“How the hell should I know? I haven’t been fucking home.” I hate to talk to Rae’s best friend like this, but I’m too pissed and scared to have any real control on how the words leave my mouth.
Just then, I spot a couple pieces of paper on the floor next to the kitchen counter. I found an empty manila envelope on the island when I got home but didn’t really think much of it until now.
Kneeling down, I pick up the paper and what appears to be an ultrasound picture off the floor. I wouldn’t even know what type of photo it is if it wasn’t for the ones my sister posted all over social media when she finally announced she was pregnant with her third child.
“Gabe?” Amber’s voice is distant in my ear as I flip the piece of paper in my hands and read the contents.
My heart clamors inside my chest, and I suddenly feel a bit off balance. Rising to my feet, the picture and note in hand, a sort of fog settles over me. For a moment, I almost feel like I suddenly exist in some sick alternate reality.
“Gabe?” Amber speaks again, somewhat pulling me back to my senses. “What’s going on? Is everything okay?”
“Find Rae.” My voice comes out void of emotion, the magnitude of the situation not quite catching up to me yet. “Find Rae and call me the moment you do.”
I end the call without another word, my heart beating so fucking hard I feel like it might burst straight out of my chest at any moment.
Andrea—I toss the name around in my head for a moment, not sure how to place who this is. That is until I look at the ultrasound picture again and see the name Andrea Marks printed across the top.
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” I mutter to myself, running my hands through my hair as I try to process all of this.
Andrea Marks is someone I met on the road earlier this year. If I had to guess I would say about four or five months ago, but that’s a very loose estimation. Most of my time on the road is blurred together, and I have trouble focusing in on one specific moment of time.
I do remember sleeping with her, very vaguely, and then she went all stalker on my ass and had to be banned from shows after causing quite a scene, which is the only reason I even remember her name to begin with.
Looking down at the phone still in my hand, I numbly type in Sean’s number before pressing it to my ear. As the band’s manager, I hope he can help me figure all this out. It rings four times before his voicemail picks up, and by the time I’m leaving a message the anger and fear have resurfaced tenfold.
“Sean, it’s Gabe. I need you to call me back as soon as humanly fucking possible. We have a problem.” I end the call, hoping he can get the label’s attorneys on this immediately.
While I don’t deny sleeping with the woman, it seems highly suspect to me that she shows up here out of the blue two weeks after I’ve returned home to drop this bombshell on me. Something seems off—or maybe it’s just that I don’t want to let myself believe that I fathered another child, this time from someone who has proven more than once that she’s bat-shit fucking crazy.
Rae’s face flashes through my mind, and I imagine what she looked like when she saw this, the realization that I truly am the man she feared me to be. Fuck. I can’t imagine how hurt she must be.
She moved all the way here so we could be a family, only to learn that Landen may not be my only child. Of course, she went running for the hills, and honestly, I can’t fucking blame her.
Fuck. I know where she’s going. Of course, it’s not that hard to figure out. She’s going home. She’s going back to Georgia. She left me without even giving me a chance to fucking explain. But what would I have said if she had? I don’t have an answer for this. I can’t suddenly make this go away. And if this ends up being true and I fucking lose her forever, I know for a one hundred percent fact that I will never forgive myself.
****
“How much longer until we know something?” I pace Sean’s office, my hands shoved deep into the pockets of my jeans.
“Hopefully pretty soon. Jackson is verifying the authenticity of the ultrasound picture as we speak.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means he’s making sure that everything on there is accurate, that it is, in fact, her ultrasound, and that the due date has not been altered in any way.”
“Do you think she did? Change the ultrasound to make it look like I’m the father?” I stop, hitting Sean with hopeful eyes.
“Let’s just say it would not be the first time I’ve seen it happen.” He sits back in his black leather office chair, crossing his arms in front of his chest. “Right now it’s just a game of wait and see.”
I’ve considered this as a possibility, of course. Given Andrea’s history with me, I can’t say it’s something I would put past her, but I thought maybe that was just my way of reassuring myself that this wasn’t real.
A sudden rush of relief floods through me at the knowledge that I’m not alone in this suspicion. Nothing has been confirmed yet, but just the thought that maybe, just maybe, this baby isn’t mine, is the only thing that’s keeping me from totally losing my shit.
I keep hoping that maybe I still have time to fix things with Rae.
I haven’t been able to shake the loss of her since coming home yesterday to find her gone. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I feel utterly fucking exhausted, but I refuse to stop until I know what I’m facing.
I have to get Rae back. I just need to know what ground I’m standing on when I do.