Chapter 4

JL hadn’t dated in over a year, and even then those men had never lasted more than a few weeks. She was sure that things with Enzo weren’t going to go anywhere. They were just too different. His job, his car, his upbringing…it was all too much. But at least they could have fun for a while. Well, if he’d even agree to go out with her after today.

She gave him directions, and ten minutes later they were parked in front of a large warehouse. “Where are we now?”

“Have you ever been rock climbing?” she asked as she climbed out of his car.

His arm brushed against hers, and she tried to ignore the electric current the touch sent down her arm all the way to the tips of her fingers. She took a small step away. “Let’s grab a hot dog first.” She pointed to the street vendor in front of the warehouse. “Best hot dog you’ll ever have.”

“Uh…yeah, sure,” he said, not looking too excited to eat from a hot dog cart. She snorted, loving the fact that she was obviously taking him out of his comfort zone yet again. If there was one thing she wanted to get out of this date, it was to show him who she was. If they ended up going out again, he’d know what he was getting himself into. She was the kind of woman who ate street food, who didn’t plan things, who liked to dip her feet into the water just to think. She was the kind of girl who might not be sure whether she’d be able to make rent this month, but she did make sure to stop and smell the roses every now and again—or in this particular instance, stop and grab the best-tasting hot dog in all of Florida.

“Hey, Harry.” She skipped over to the man flipping hot dogs and kissed his cheek.

The man beamed. “JL! How’ve you been? Haven’t seen you in a few months.”

“I know. I’ve been busy. Harry this is my friend Enzo. Enzo, this is Harry. He makes the best hot dogs in the world.”

“Pleasure to meet you,” Enzo said with a nod.

“Likewise,” Harry said. “Everything on yours, too, Enzo?”

Enzo looked at the hotdogs and the jars of “everything” and crinkled his nose.

“Yeah, give him everything, Harry,” JL answered for him.

Harry prepared two hot dogs, slathered them with all the homemade things that made up “everything,” and handed one to Enzo and the other to JL. She closed her eyes and took a huge bite of the hot dog. “Mmm. So good.”

She nudged Enzo in the ribs, and he hesitantly took a bite. He was frowning as he chewed, but the frown slowly morphed into a smile. “Oh, wow, this is really good.”

“Told ya, darlin’,” she said with a mouthful of food. “I was starved.”

“You’ve been eating this whole time. How are you starved?”

She shrugged and took another bite.

“How’s Rita these days?” Harry asked.

JL stiffened and swallowed what now felt like cement lodged in her throat. “Oh, you know,” she said with a shrug. “Rita’s Rita.” She didn’t want Enzo to ask questions. Harry nodded, sadly understanding.

“Who’s Rita?” Enzo asked, stuffing the last of the hot dog into his mouth.

“My mother.” She tossed the rest of her hot dog into the garbage, suddenly not so hungry. He looked as if he was about to ask questions, but she didn’t give him the opportunity. “You all done?”

“Uh…yeah.” He reached into his pocket and took out his wallet, but JL shoved it aside.

“Harry, what do I owe you?” she asked.

“You?” He leaned over and kissed her cheek. “Nothing, honey. Come by and visit an ol’ man once in a while, will ya?”

“Absolutely, Harry. Thanks.”

Enzo put the wallet back into his pocket and shook the old man’s hand, then followed JL into the warehouse. “How do you know him? Seems nice.”

“Yeah, Harry’s the best. Known him forever.” She leaned into the counter and asked for Miles. The girl working there left to find him.

“Who’s Miles?”

“The owner.”

“Do you know someone everywhere?”

“Not everywhere,” she said with a sassy smirk.

A man in his early thirties came around the counter, lifted her up, and spun her around. “JL, how’ve you been? Finally made it down, I see.”

“Yeah, came to redeem your offer.” She moved aside after he set her back on her feet. “This is my friend Enzo. Enzo, this is Miles.”

“Nice to meet you, man,” Miles said with a firm handshake, then turned back to JL. “You sure you’re up to it?”

“Yep.” JL practically bounced with energy. “I think.”

“How about you?” Miles asked Enzo.

Enzo looked over his shoulder to the huge open warehouse. There were rock-climbing walls with makeshift cliffs as much as forty feet high, with harnesses that hung from the ceiling.

“Absolutely. Always wanted to do this,” Enzo said, genuinely excited.

“Cool, man. Let’s get you guys all set up.”

Again Enzo took out his wallet, but again JL shooed him away. “Stop doing that.”

“I don’t feel comfortable with you paying for this. I know this is expensive, and anyway, I’m the man and I like to pay—”

“Oh, stop with that ‘I’m the man’ bullshit. I already told you—I invited you, so it’s my treat. Regardless, he owes me a favor. He’s not going to charge me.” Enzo’s full lips tightened and she noticed a tic in his jaw. “Oh, relax. It’s not whatever warped thing you’re thinking. He needed a face painter for his daughter’s birthday party last year, and I volunteered. I was there for four hours in a roomful of kids. Trust me, this is the least he can do.”

“So you’ve done this before?”

“Nope. Never. I’m kind of nervous, actually. Not a big fan of heights.”

Enzo laughed. “Then why the hell would you bring me here?”

“Because it looks like fun.” She looked up, her stomach now full of butterflies. “Sort of,” she muttered as she took a deep, calming breath.

“It’s safe. Don’t be nervous. Or we can just, I don’t know…not do it.”

“Nope. We’re doing it.” For the project she was working on in her spare time, she had to get over her stupid fear of heights. No time like the present, right?

Enzo ran to his car to take off his glasses and put in the disposable contact lenses he kept in the glove compartment. When he returned, an employee came and handed them paperwork, and once everything was explained and signed—and JL was thoroughly freaked out—it was time to get harnessed in and begin.

Slowly she began to climb. One arm up, followed by a leg on a colored peg, then again with the opposite leg and hand. Enzo was right next to her, climbing faster and more assuredly; he’d definitely gotten the hang of it faster than she had. “So why not always wear contacts?” she asked. She needed to make conversation because she was nervous as hell. And also, without his glasses on, she was able to get an unobstructed view of his beautiful brown eyes, which left her a little unhinged and a lot disarmed when he looked at her.

“My eyes are sensitive, and after a while they become irritated by the contacts,” he said as he continued to climb.

She inched her way up, one foot on the next peg, then the other. The higher she went the more comfortable she began to feel, and then she felt dumb for not having done this sooner and for having let her fears get the best of her for so long. She looked up and saw that Enzo was way above her.

“So glad we did this.”

“Yeah, it’s not as bad as I thought it would be.” As soon as she said that she lost her footing. She shrieked as she grabbed for a hold and missed. She dropped maybe half a foot before the rope snapped taut, but it felt as if she was plummeting to her death. In her harness she swung from the rope like a pendulum, both hands gripping the rope. JL couldn’t hear anything but the blood rushing in her ears and the hammering of her heart. She squeezed her eyes shut. When the swinging slowed, she opened one eye tentatively, saw how far up she was, and then promptly shut it again. She was vaguely aware that people were talking to her, but she could hear nothing except the sound of her fear.

And then Enzo was by her side.

“Jamie Lynn.” She couldn’t open her eyes, but she could hear his calm voice. “Listen to me. Look at me.” She shook her head and held the rope tighter.

“Jamie Lynn,” he barked. This time his voice was louder and more assertive, and she opened her eyes. “Listen to me. Focus on me. Only me. Don’t look down. Don’t look at anything but me.” His voice was unwavering. She nodded slightly. “Give me your hand.” When she didn’t, he added, “I let you take control of this date long enough. I’m in charge now. Give me your hand.” She shook her head from side to side, the rope scraping her forehead since she had it clutched so tightly to her. “Baby, give me your damn hand.” She looked into his eyes and—slowly, shakily, fearfully—reached for him. Quickly he grasped her hand. There were voices coming from below, but all she could focus on was his. “Okay, good girl.” He glanced across. “Right by your left hand is a peg. Place your hand on it. Do it now.” Her legs were trembling so badly she wasn’t sure how she could reach for it. He was bracing himself against another peg but at the same time was trying to push her closer to the wall so that she could reach a handhold.

She missed on the first attempt because she had one hand holding Enzo’s and the other holding the rope and didn’t want to let go of either of them to reach for the fucking peg. “Jamie Lynn. I’m going to swing you forward again, but you have to let go of the rope this time. Do it,” he commanded. She took a breath and whimpered as he swung her forward, but she let go of the rope and gripped the green peg. “Okay, now put your left foot on that red peg. It’s a little bit further down, but you’ve got this.” She did as she was instructed. “Okay. Good.” Enzo moved to another hold in order to get closer to her. He placed her hand, the one that had been gripping his, on a peg, and gave it a quick squeeze. “I’m going to let go of this hand now, okay?”

“No, no! Please don’t!” she cried.

“Listen to me.” His voice was firm but not loud or condescending. “You know that ride they have in every carnival, the chair swings? This is the same thing. If you happen to slip again, it’s no big deal—you just swing with it. You’re harnessed. You’re safe.”

“I—I never go on that fucking ride!” she said, her voice almost unrecognizable even to herself. “Travis always wanted me to go on it, but I never would. I hate that ride.”

Enzo chuckled.

“Don’t laugh at me!” She glared at him, almost crying. “I hate heights.”

He began to move up, not letting go of her hand, and she slowly followed. “This is a ridiculous date, babe,” he said with a gentle smile. “You should’ve let me pick. Who the hell takes a date rock climbing? We could’ve been having a delicious lobster meal right this second at the Manhattan in Tampa.”

Moving gingerly from one hold to the next, she noticed that when she slowed down, unsure of where to put her foot or hand, he guided her patiently. “I hate lobster!” she yelled. “And anyway, you’re having a great time.”

“And you’re having the time of your life, I can see,” he said sarcastically.

“Shut up, Enzo! I’m getting over my fucking fears! Epiphany happening here!” Her voice was shaky, though. She was about to look down, but he hollered at her.

“I told you to look at me. Don’t look down.” Again his voice was firm, but the playfulness returned immediately. “I mean, really, don’t you want to look at my ass?”

If she hadn’t been certain she was about to plummet to her death, then yes, she would definitely have wanted to look at his ass. But right at that moment she wanted to get off the wall. “I want to go down. Not up. I know they can make that happen. The guys holding the ropes down there can do shit to make that happen. I give up. So, make it happen. Reverse this fucker.”

“No. We’re going to finish. I told them not to do that when you first let go.”

“I didn’t hear you say anything,” she said, focused on the climbing.

“I think you were having a nervous breakdown or a heart attack, one of those. And I’m fairly certain it made you deaf.” She knew exactly what he was doing by being playful yet argumentative, and she had to admit it was working. And he was right—she hadn’t been able to hear anything but the blood rushing in her ears when she’d first slipped.

He continued to speak. “Look up. You’re almost there. You were closer to the top than the bottom. I made an executive decision.” He placed her hand on one of the green pegs, closed his own hand around hers, and squeezed. “Go on and take another step up.”

“No!” she cried.

“Look at me,” he demanded, his voice assertive but not harsh. “Jamie Lynn, baby, look at me,” he repeated. When she did, he went on, “You’re not going to fall. I’m right here. Focus and go slow.”

She took a breath and did as he said. Slowly she took a trembling step, her hands following one by one. Her palms were clammy and sweat dripped slowly down her spine. She was a hundred percent sure every part of her body would be sore tomorrow. But, he’d climbed up with her and told her what to do to make it all the way up. He’d been firm when he needed to be, and joked around to distract her. He reached the top and hoisted himself up, then turned and he extended his arm to her. She reached for it, still trembling, and took the final step, and he pulled her up. She heard cheering from below.

“Damn, I’m proud of you!” He pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her. Except for the kiss they’d shared a few months back, this was the closest they’d ever been to each other. His hand was at the back of her head and his other arm was wrapped around her waist. “So proud,” he whispered, looking in her eyes. “You’re okay. Take a deep breath.”

She inhaled and exhaled slowly a few times. “Great date, huh?” She gave a self-deprecating smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.

“Best ever,” he replied seriously.

She rolled her eyes and shifted, planning to look down, but Enzo held her in place. “We’re pretty high up. You sure you want to turn around and look?” He knelt down slowly and pulled her down with him. “Why don’t you sit and slowly turn around? I think that’s better than just looking down while you’re standing. You may get vertigo. This way is easier.”

“Yeah. Sitting is better,” she said nervously. He turned his body and let his legs hang down from the top of the wall. He held her hand as she slowly turned and sat the same way. “Oh, God!” She closed her eyes.

“So, what did you have planned next? Scuba diving with sharks?” he asked. At that she opened her eyes, looked at him, and snorted, even though she understood what he was doing—trying to get her mind off the height again. “I mean, I offered dinner, and you said no. Should have listened to me.”

“I thought it wouldn’t be that bad. It’s a controlled environment. It’s not like we’re on Mount Rushmore, untethered. I didn’t think I’d freak out.” The fear was slowly melting away. “Besides, I’m not scared of sharks. Or scuba diving.”

He laughed. “Is that where you want to go next, then?”

“Maybe we can do something a little bit less thrilling. Well, if you want to do something else, that is. Maybe you’ve had enough of me at this point.”

“Nah. I’m good,” he said, and winked. “I’m curious to see what death-defying, fear-inducing activity you’ve got planned for me next.”

They sat on the ledge of the wall for over half an hour, chatting about nothing important. She laughed and swung her legs a few times, the fear that had washed over her body dissipating. “So, how the hell do we get down? And I’m telling you right now, I am not climbing down. There’d better be an alternative. An elevator would be sublime.”

Enzo stood and extended his arm down to help her up. “Option one, you climb down.” She narrowed her eyes at him, which made him laugh. “I don’t think you’ll like option two better. We can just sort of push off. They’ll loosen the give on the rope and we can sort of just slide down as we push off the wall. That’s the reverse you were screeching about earlier.”

“Fuck no.”

He laughed. “Yeah, didn’t think you’d be up for that. Option three is that we just take the stairs.” He undid the harness holding the rope to her body, then did the same with his. He took her hands in his and pulled her away from the cliff toward the back wall of the warehouse.

She looked down at the wide, safe staircase, which even had a railing, and smiled. “God, you already know me so well.” They went down the stairs together, and he didn’t let go of her hand. She felt a little self-conscious about it at first but also liked the feel of his big strong hand around hers. “I’m sorry I broke down up there.”

“It’s cool.”

“I’m embarrassed,” she admitted.

He stopped halfway down and tipped her chin up, forcing her to look at him. “Don’t be embarrassed. I meant it when I said I was proud of you. Anyone who tries to tackle a fear like this on their own is someone to admire. And on a first date, no less.” They both chuckled. “You’re a hell of a woman, Jamie Lynn.”

She smiled shyly as they continued to walk down.