Chapter 22
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“Hey man,” Troy joined Evan at the large window that overlooked the town proper. “I think we’re going to take off.”
They’d been at the Red Card Warning wrap party for about an hour. It was being held at The Cove which was an upscale restaurant that overlooked the valley in which Hope Falls was nestled.
“Are you sure?” Evan felt like shit. He’d been a terrible host.
Troy and his little sister, Mila, had taken the detour Troy had promised on their way back from Disneyland and come to visit him.
They’d arrived early this morning. Evan had shown them around town, and done his best to be a good tour guide, but he’d barely slept since he’d fucked things up with Shayne three days ago.
Luckily, Mila had met several of her favorite celebrities today. Between meeting Shayne and Kyle at the party, and running into Karina at Sue Ann’s diner, at least she had some cool pictures to show for the day trip.
“You guys are more than welcome to stay tonight. Get a good night’s rest.” Evan had planned to stay at Mountain Ridge tonight, with Shayne, but since they hadn’t spoken since bursting into her trailer and springing the news of her brother on her, he didn’t think he’d be using the cabin after all. “I’ve got plenty of room.”
“Nah. I like driving at night. She sleeps and I don’t have to listen to what she calls music.”
“Damn, you sound old.” Evan chuckled, remembering when he was a teenager his own father complaining about him and his brother’s musical taste. He was constantly yelling at them to “turn down that noise.”
“I am old.” Troy tilted his head forward so Evan could get a good look. “You see these gray hairs? Raising a kid will do that to you.”
Evan glanced over at Mila, who was busy speaking animatedly to Shayne.
“Well, you’re doing a good job. She seems like a sweet kid.”
“She is. Hey, thanks again for today. She keeps saying it was her best birthday ever and I don’t think it’s because she met Mickey Mouse.”
“Of course. Any time.”
“And if you’re ever up my way, you better let me return the favor. We don’t have movie stars but I’ll kick your ass on a round of golf.”
“Golf, huh? Sounds good,” Evan chuckled.
Evan and Troy had always been competitive. It was their thing. Whether it was ping pong, pool, or eating hot dogs, they battled it out over anything and everything. They loosely kept score for the overall competition that would probably never end, and if he remembered correctly, they were tied.
“All right, then.” Troy started to leave but turned back. “Hey, did you get what you needed from Clark?”
Evan was wondering if his friend would bring up the private investigator. “Yeah.”
Troy waited, but Evan didn’t elaborate.
“Is everything okay with you? You seem…distracted.”
He was distracted. He was more than distracted. He felt completely at loose ends. “I’m good, man.”
“You’re a shitty liar.” His friend deadpanned.
Evan didn’t try to deny it. “I know.”
“I’m here if you need to talk. I still owe you, remember?”
“You don’t owe me shit,” Evan said the same thing he always did when his friend tried to say he owed him.
When Troy had lost his parents, Evan had been there for his friend and supported him when he’d made the difficult decision to step away from professional baseball and move back home to raise his sister.
“Bubbas!” Mila ran up to them bubbling with excitement. “Shayne just followed me on Snapchat! Riana and Tinsley are going to freak! I can’t wait to get home and see their faces when I tell them I met Kyle Austen Reed, Karina Black, and Shayne Fox!”
Evan grinned. Shayne spread joy everywhere she went. She was truly a star that brightened people’s lives. He’d sure as hell felt like the sun was shining on him whenever she was near. And now, he felt the cold darkness of separation.
He had no one to blame for it but himself. He’d fucked up.
Evan always thought things through before acting. He was deliberate. His actions were premeditated and planned. But around Shayne, he was impulsive. He acted first and thought later. Turns out he was really bad at spontaneity.
After Troy and Mila said their goodbyes, Evan considered leaving as well. He really had no reason to stay here. He’d made an appearance and being near Shayne and not being able to touch her and kiss her was killing him. Slowly and painfully.
He’d texted her several times, apologizing and asking her if they could talk. But he hadn’t gotten a response. He’d called once and it went to her voicemail.
Tonight he’d kept his distance, but he’d been watching her closely for any sign, any signal, any hope that she wanted to speak to him.
There’d been nothing. She hadn’t so much as glanced in his direction since that day. Once, she’d turned a corner and hadn’t expected him to be there and their eyes met and he thought, for a split second, that he’d feel that same connection, that same unspoken bond, but there was nothing. No spark. No recognition. Nothing.
She looked at him as if he didn’t exist. And maybe she wished that he didn’t.
As much as he didn’t want to leave without talking to her, she’d made it clear that she wanted nothing to do with him. So, he chose to respect the boundaries that she’d clearly drawn and resist the urge to say goodbye.
He was heading out the door when he heard her laughter ring out. The sound still reminded him of the wind chimes that had hung outside of his window growing up. His heart cramped in his chest knowing that he wasn’t going to hear that sound again.
Evan handed the valet his ticket and waited for his truck to be pulled around. The pain in his chest was increasing and it felt like someone had sucker punched him in his gut.
“Really?!”
Evan turned to see Nolan standing beside him, arms crossed with his left brow rose so high it almost looked like it was touching his hairline. He’d developed an unlikely friendship with Shayne’s friend and stylist. Evan didn’t usually forge new friendships but since the two men both had a lot of downtime on the set, they’d ended up talking about everything from politics, to sports, to family, to religion. They disagreed on about ninety percent of everything they discussed but both shared a dry sense of humor and it was clear to Evan that Nolan loved Shayne almost as much as he did.
“That’s it? You’re just going to leave it like that? You’re gonna bounce like Wendy Williams’ tatas on a trampoline?” Nolan threw his hands up in the air as he lowered his voice so quiet that Evan had to strain to hear him. “How are you just going to drop the Benji bombshell and blow up her life like you did and then walk away? Who do you think you are, Denzel in Man on Fire?”
“She doesn’t want to talk to me.”
“You might be pretty but, damn, are you dumb.” He shook his head in disgust.
“I’ve tried to talk to her but she doesn’t want anything to do with me,” he explained.
“You’ve tried to talk to her.” Nolan’s disbelief was evident in his condescending tone.
“Yes. I texted her. Several times.”
“A few tired-ass texts is you trying to talk to her?” He shook his head in disgust. “If that’s you trying then I was wrong about you. About the man that I thought you were. I thought you loved her.”
“I do. I do love her,” Evan admitted out loud for the first time as he scrubbed his hands over his face in frustration. “You don’t understand.”
“You’re right. I don’t. If that’s what you call love, I don’t understand.” Nolan turned on his heels and left Evan staring after him and feeling more confused and agitated than ever.
The valet arrived with his truck and as Evan reached out to take the key, he froze.
He loved Shayne and he couldn’t let her leave without telling her.
“Sir?”
Evan heard the valet call out to him as he turned and went back into the restaurant. He didn’t look back or stop to explain. He was on a mission.
He stepped into the main dining area and scanned the room, searching for her. His eyes tracked the faces of the cast and crew three times and was about to do another scan when he heard Nolan’s voice beside him.
“She’s out on the patio.”
Evan looked out the windows and saw her standing against the railing, her blonde hair blowing lightly in the wind, the moon shining down on her like a perfect spotlight as if Mother Nature was her personal lighting tech.
He beelined it out the double doors. He stilled a few feet away from her, not wanting to startle her.
“Shayne.” He said her name with raw emotion.
She jumped slightly, surprised by his voice. When she turned around and saw him, there was a flash of recognition, a tiny spark of what they used to share, but then it was gone.
“Damn, I miss you.” He hadn’t meant to say that, it was just what came out. He’d wanted to open with another apology, but he couldn’t help himself.
Her head shook back and forth in tiny movements and he saw her eyes look past him at the door he’d just come through. He could tell that she was plotting her escape route. He figured he’d better say what he needed to say and quick.
“I’m sorry, Shayne. For the way I handled things. It was careless and inconsiderate but I never meant to hurt you. I would never hurt you. I could never hurt you, not intentionally, because I love you.” He took a deep breath and repeated the words he’d been holding in for what felt like forever, “I love you, Shayne.”
Her eyes rounded to the size of saucers and the color drained from her face. It wasn’t exactly the reaction he’d hoped for, but he was too far in to back out now.
“Last week, before…everything, I booked the cabin at Mountain Ridge for us tonight. Our last night together in Hope Falls. I’m going to be there. Waiting. And I hope that when you’re done here, that you’ll come. But if not, if this is the last time that I see you, I just had to tell you that I’ll always be grateful for the time that we got to spend together. You opened up a part of me, a part of my heart that no one ever has. Being with you, these past few weeks, has been the best thing that ever happened to me. You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Falling asleep with you in my arms, waking up with you beside me, it was like finally coming home. Your smile, your laugh, your heart, your eyes…you…you are my home.”
“Evan…I can’t…I don’t know….what to say…” Shayne’s eyes began watering and his heart sank.
“Then don’t. Don’t say anything. I’ll be at the cabin. If I see you, great. If not, just know that I love you, Shayne.” A sad smile tilted on his lips. “I’ll always love you.”
Evan turned and walked away from Shayne for what might be the last time in his life. If it were, at least he could walk away knowing that she knew how he felt. She knew that he loved her. And he always would.