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For the Heart of an Outlaw by Joyce, T. S. (11)

 

When a knock sounded on the cabin door, Karis laid the washrag she’d been using to wipe down the counters across the lip of the sink. “Coming!”

The afternoon sun reflected off the snow and nearly blinded her as she opened the door. Genie ran past her legs and into the house before she could react, but whatever. The squirrel hadn’t bit her, so there was that.

A growl rattled up her throat as she turned and stared at the squirrel, who glared back at her as she crapped on the counter Karis had just cleaned. If Genie was a grape, she would be the sourest one.

“Sometimes, I strongly dislike that animal,” Ava muttered from the porch.

“Same,” Karis gritted out.

“I have to go into town to get groceries for the boys to cook while they’re out on the trail. Do you want to come? Or do you need anything from the store?”

“You’re okay with me tagging along? I mean, you’ve already spent three days teaching me about the ranch. I figured you needed time off.”

Ava laughed and shook her head, her black curls brushing her cheeks with the movement. “Honestly, I was lonely before you came along. Well, really, I’ve been lonely my whole life. I didn’t let anyone close to me after Dad left. But since I’ve come back here, it’s like Trigger broke me.”

Karis pulled down the sleeves of her sweater and followed her out of the house toward Colt’s truck. “What do you mean?” she asked.

“I was a really tough girl before I came here, and now Trigger makes me feel things and want things, and he makes me reevaluate myself all the time and take stock of how I feel with every situation. And sometimes I think I would like a friend. You know? Like one outside of the guys.”

“A girlfriend,” Karis said.

Ava giggled. “Yes, apparently I’m not as anti-social as I wish I could be and I need a girlfriend. And seriously, now I get scared like Colt does.”

Karis opened the driver’s side door. She’d been getting good at driving his truck around the ranch. “What do you mean?”

“I’ve never seen my brother scared over anything. And, oh my God, never tell him I talked to you about this. But he’s tough. You have probably figured that out. He’ll work the ranch until his hands are raw and bleeding and never complain and get up first thing the next day and do it all over. Time’s infinity. He’s a hard-worker, a good provider, and he’s focused on helping Trig. Well, if he doesn’t run this place into the ground killing the damn cows first. And he isn’t a complainer either. He’ll do his work quietly and joke in his off-time, but I’ve never seen him scared. Not until you came along. Now I can see it, and I recognize it because I feel the same. He’s scared to lose you and this life you’re building together, just like I’m scared to lose what I’m building. And it’s a big deal him being scared over anything. You’ll understand someday. You haven’t watched him in a brawl yet, but you will.”

“What’s it like?”

“Fearless. Reckless. Violent. He’s not the brother I left a decade ago. He’s different. Harder. Jail don’t scare him anymore, getting hurt don’t scare him…fights definitely don’t scare him.”

“Why not?”

“Because he wins them all. He and Trigger always do. They’re titans in a town of mice. But it’s eye-opening, too. He can be gentle and funny and sweet, and then he can be…”

“Monster.”

“Yes.”

Karis turned the key, and the engine roared to life. “Me, too.”

Ava turned the heater vents toward her. “I have a theory.”

“Lay it on me,” Karis dared her as she pulled out of Colt’s front yard.

“I think you’re a predator shifter. You don’t bother Trig and Colt too much, but Kurt won’t give you his back. Have you noticed?”

“I have,” Karis agreed with a nod. She was trying to contain her smile. Kurt had asked her three times over the last three days, “What the fuck are you?” But it was fun to keep him guessing.

“So you have to be bigger and meaner than a mountain lion. And Kurt isn’t a submissive one either. He killed an Alpha.” Ava tossed her a significant look. “Killed him.” Out the passenger window, the winter woods were blurring by behind Ava, who looked striking with her blue eyes and black hair and bright red earmuffs.

Now, Karis had always been the type of girl who was good at instincts on people. And Ava hadn’t given her any red flags. Not a one. She said things like they were, gave the boys as much shit as they gave her, and she always looked Karis straight in the eyes when she was telling her something important. She was an honest woman, and Karis respected and genuinely liked that about her. She was trustworthy, so Karis shared with her something she was very protective over. “I’m a bear.”

“Grizzly?”

“No. Polar.”

Ava straightened up, and her dark eyebrows arched up to her hairline. “You’re a polar bear shifter? I didn’t even know those existed! I thought it was just brown bears and black bears!”

“There aren’t many of us. And I’m one of two females.”

“Who is the other one?”

“My mom. We were Turned by my step-dad.”

“Oh, my gosh. So you’re like…famous shifters.”

Karis shrugged. “I don’t know. I don’t pay attention to that stuff. We were the only shifters in the town I grew up in. I met a lion shifter on a blind date. Jackson. But he wasn’t my match. I don’t think he’s anyone’s match. He lies just to see if he can get away with it.”

“Gross,” Ava said, relaxing back into her seat. “I wanted to be like Trigger.” She cast Karis a quick glance. “This stays between us.”

“You got it.”

“I wanted to be a bear like him. I can’t even explain why. Maybe it’s a hundred different reasons. He struggled with the animal, like Colt does. He leaves me at night to go Change in the woods, and I want to be a part of his other life, you know?”

“I do. I understand. I didn’t get Turned until I was ten, and all I wanted was to be like my mom and my step-dad and all my brothers. I didn’t like feeling left out.”

“Yes! Exactly. I’ll always be the only human in our Clan. Even my kids will have grizzlies in them. Trigger wants me to stay human, though. He carries too much guilt over what he did to Colton, so here I sit, completely normal and human, in a ranch full of supernaturals.” She pointed at a four-way stop ahead. “Turn left there. That’ll take us into town.”

Karis did as she was instructed, easy on the gas, because even with chains on the tires, the old pickup was an easy slider on sharp turns. “I feel like I’m in driver’s ed again,” she admitted.

“Slow, slow,” Ava said in a deep, studious voice. “Now, ease onto the gas but give yourself plenty of time to stop for that red light ahead.”

Karis snorted. “Shut it.”

“Let’s get a drink before we go back home. It could be an impromptu girls’ night. And then I could get you drunk and convince you to stay with my idiot brother.”

“You don’t even have to convince me. I actually like him.”

“Barf.”

“He’s really good in bed.”

“Double barf.”

“Nice big dick—”

Ava opened the door and made like she was going to get out of the moving vehicle. “I’ll walk from here.”

Karis was snickering at how hilarious she was. “Okay, okay, I’ll be good.”

“Thank you.”

“His dick is satisfactory.”

“Karis!”

She was belly laughing now and nearly doubled over as she pulled to a stop at the light. “For real, for real, don’t get out. I’ll be so well-behaved and boring.”

“I need like six margaritas to purge those words out of my brain,” Ava muttered.

“Are we doing this? Is it margarita night?”

“Fuuuuuck yes, it is. There’s a bar in the new taco place off Main Street. I’ll call Trigger and tell them when we’re already a few drinks in. Otherwise they’ll come up here before we can get wild and probably fight like thirty people. Bar fights are their favorite.”

Karis hadn’t laughed this much in a long time. Since she’d come to the ranch, she’d felt lighter. Happier maybe. There was no pressure on her. It was just fun. Hard work, yes, as she was learning to help Ava with the chores in the barn and around the cabins while the boys were out and about, but it was fulfilling work. Nights were about getting to know the Clan and late-night pillow talk with Colt. She was falling harder and harder for him every day.

Her phone chirped, and she pried her gaze from the red light in front of her to the cell phone hanging from the top of her purse. Already, she could see Jackson’s name on the text.

“Geez,” she murmured, frowning down at the thing.

Ava picked it up and read the message. “‘You aren’t answering. I’m on my way to Darby right now to fix this. I messed up. I’m a different man. You made me different. I love you, Kare-Bear.” Ava scrunched up her face. “Barf. Who is this douche-rocket?”

Karis swallowed hard so her voice wouldn’t break when she answered. “That’s the man who ruined me. He was the biggest waste of time, and now he’s coming here.”

When the light turned green, she eased onto the gas. “I swear he has this sixth sense. It’s like he can tell when I’m happy, and he instinctively tries to pull me back for another round of misery. What am I going to do? I don’t want to see him. I don’t want him here.”

“Oh, he’s not coming here,” Ava murmured, staring down at her phone. Her fingers were moving at a furious pace as she typed something. “Aaaand send.” She twirled her pointer finger in the air and tapped the glowing cell phone screen.

“What did you just send him?” she asked, coming to a stop at the next red light. Apparently, they would hit every one today.

“I sent him this picture.” Ava turned the screen toward her, and Karis gasped.

It was a selfie she’d taken of her and Colt in bed, up in the loft, illuminated by the soft strands of lights he’d hung from the rafters for her. She was wearing a black lacey lingerie set, and Colt didn’t have a shirt on. He was hugging her up tightly, his lips pressed against her cheek but smiling, and she was looking right at the camera with the biggest, happiest grin. She hadn’t looked at the picture since she’d taken it. Huh. Karis took the phone gingerly and studied her face. She was a plain girl, with too many unique features to be classically beautiful, but in this picture, she thought herself pretty. Maybe it was the genuine smile that lit up her face. Colt looked hot as fuck too, scars and all. She should be embarrassed at Ava seeing her in her negligee, or of Jackson seeing such an intimate picture, but she wasn’t. Not at all. She was kind of proud she’d gotten to this point—where she could take a picture where she looked infinitely happy.

Jackson had always been the jealous type. He was probably flipping out right now. Karis tried to care, but found she had zero fucks to give.

“Oh, and I also forwarded a screen shot of douche-rocket’s text to Colt, so he’ll handle it the rest of the way.”

“You did what?”

“You heard me. There isn’t enough room in this town for any more ghosts. If Jackson cares about survival, he’ll leave you alone and move on.”

Her phone chirped, and in shock, she looked down at it. There was a text from Colt. It’s handled. Everything is okay. You girls have fun today and we’ll come to town later. Do a double date night. Karis…he’s your past. Nothing more. You’re okay.

The tightness eased in her chest, and she released a long, steadying breath.

Ding.

She checked the text, but it was Jackson. Simply, he said, Nevermind.

Ava was leaned over the bench seat reading and snorted. “God, I would pay money to see what Colt said to him.”

Ding.

It was Colt again. Admission: dealing with your ex makes me want to bend you over the bed and leave a hand print on your ass while I fuck you just to remind you of who you picked and who you belong to. And I know what you’re going to say. You don’t belong to me. But ooooh you do, Karis. Just as surely as I belong to you. See you soon.

“Oh, my God,” she whispered, her eyes glued to the sexiest combination of words she’d ever read. She loved spankings when they were playing rough.

“Okay, I should be grossed out because it’s my brother saying that, but go Colt,” Ava muttered from where she had her face a few inches away from the screen. “When Trig gets possessive like that, it makes me want to have, like, four of his babies at one time.”

All Karis could do was read and re-read the last message and nod her head in agreeance. Yep. Super sexy.

Honk! The car behind her let her know the light had turned green, and with a little squeak, Karis dropped the phone in her purse and pulled through the green light. And for the next three miles, until they were parked in front of the Darby Grocery store, she thought about how nice it was going to feel when he took her from behind tonight. Colt’s book said his favorite position was reverse cowboy? Well hers was doggy style. Or bear style, whatever.

“I need a job,” she said suddenly. It felt right, though.

“You can help with prepping trail rides for the ranch,” Ava said, checking the cash in her wallet.

“Yeah, but you and Kurt and Gunner have a routine. And yeah, I know I help, but you could easily do it without me, and if I get a job in town, I could bring in extra income for the ranch, you know?”

Ava’s bottom lip was poked out as she nodded like she was impressed. “Hmm. I mean, any little bit helps. What did you do before you came here?”

“I worked two jobs. During the day I worked as an administrative assistant for a realtor. I did a lot of paperwork in a cubicle. But at nights, I took shifts at this little hole-in-the-wall steakhouse.”

“Which did you like better?”

“Well the steakhouse paid less, but I didn’t feel trapped.”

Ava shrugged. “Maybe the grocery store? Or there are a few restaurants in town. You could check if they’re hiring. Can I say something?”

“Say anything.”

“That just made me kind of happy.”

“Why?”

“Because it means you’re putting down roots here. Starting to think about building a life. I don’t want you to leave, but I’m trying to keep pressure off you because it must be difficult to be a breeder. I mean, it must be hard to be matched with someone sight unseen and try to squish your lives together. I didn’t know if Colt would have to relocate to be with his match. I’m really relieved you’re nice, you make him smile, you make him scared, and you’re thinking about sticking around. I didn’t want to lose my brother. I just got him back, but you aren’t taking him away. You’re making him better.”

“I don’t know about better. We have a freezer chock-full of steaks because he killed like three cows plus Deadfast.”

“Well, yes, but also he hasn’t punched Trigger in four days. I’m gonna order him a most-improved trophy.”

“Wait, what? Does he punch Trigger often?”

“All the boys fight,” Ava said with a look like “duh.” “They’re boys.” She slid out of the truck, and Karis stared after her as she sauntered toward the grocery store. She paused on the icy asphalt and turned. “You comin’?”

“Yeah,” she muttered, shaking her head for the tenth time today and exiting the truck. Okay, Trigger and Colt liked to punch each other, but that wasn’t just boys being boys. She’d been raised with eight older brothers and, sure, she saw her fair share of arguments, but they rarely went to blows, and it hadn’t happened since they were all cubs. Two grown-ass men with their fists always ready, and one of them was hers. And she knew she was supposed to disagree with the way they settled their disputes, but well…that was just Colt. It wasn’t that she didn’t care. It was more like she accepted him and whatever his inner animal required for him to stay steady. And apparently, blood was what the Warmaker needed.

If Jackson cared about his own hide, he would do best to stay far, far away from here. Because if Karis didn’t skin him, she knew a very tall, beefy, growly outlaw cowboy who definitely would.

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