4
Man with a Plan
A grating alarm sounds in my ear. My eyes pop open and my heart jolts into overdrive. I grab my phone. It’s flashing 23:00 hours at me.
Shit! How can it be that time already?
I dismiss the alarm and it’s then I notice the sound of chatter coming from the living room. I sit up on my elbows.
Who the hell…?
And then it dawns on me.
Oh, of course, it’s him. The beautiful stray I picked up this morning. It sounds like he has the TV on.
To be fair, it’s not as if I ever worried that a burglar might break into my apartment. This block is owned by the hotel, for the sole use of its employees, so we’re not exactly going to be rich pickings. We get subsidised accommodation, which means a tiny open-plan apartment, with the only concession to luxury being a separate bedroom. But I do really appreciate such a luxury. It means I can invite someone over and depending how the night goes, they can either sleep on the sofa…or with me. Of course, I haven’t had anyone over since I’ve been working nights.
I toss the sheets aside and notice I’m wearing boxers. I usually sleep naked. I must have slipped them on because I have a guest in the apartment. It’s strange how having someone stay over can turn every detail of your routine on its head. I wonder how long it takes to get totally comfortable with sharing your space with another person? I’ve never been in a relationship long enough to find that out.
I quickly dress and fling open my bedroom door to find Ray on my sofa, watching TV. His back is arrow straight and he’s sitting crossed-legged, with his feet resting on his thighs, in what my sister used to call the lotus position. He looks like such a neat little package sat like that and I lean against the door jamb to admire him for a few seconds until he makes me aware he knows I’m watching.
“I hope I didn’t wake you,” he says, without taking his eyes off the TV.
“No, my alarm did a good job of that.”
He picks up the remote control and lowers the volume. Twisting his head to look at me, he waves the remote in the air. “I studied how you used this device this morning when we watched the movie. I’m still not sure what all the buttons are for, but I’m getting the hang of it.”
“Are you into yoga?” I ask.
“Yoga?” he repeats, leaning forward to deposit the remote on the coffee table.
“The way you’re sitting. The lotus position.”
“No, I just find it comfortable to sit like this.”
“You’re very flexible,” I note, with a suggestive arch of my brow.
“I am perfect,” he tells me matter-of-factly.
“Well, not quite,” I scoff. “You need to work on your modesty.”
He shrugs. “Why? There is no point me being reticent in pointing out my assets if I wish to attract a female.”
I stroll over to sit down beside him on the sofa, giving his jutting knee plenty of leeway. “Is that all you ever think about?”
“It is my main focus at this juncture of my life.” He nods towards the TV. “This programme is very interesting. Not only is it helping me develop more natural language skills, but I’m also learning a lot about human relations.”
I laugh. “You’re watching re-runs of a soap to learn about human relations?”
“It’s called Bell End,” he informs me. “Apparently that’s the name of the commuter village in the Thames Valley where all these people live. I don’t think it’s very realistic, but it is fascinating to watch. They all seem incapable of sticking with their own partners and are constantly attempting to bed someone else’s mate, which gives me lots of opportunities to study the mating ritual. I need to be able to mimic the intensity of emotion the male demonstrates towards the female, if I’m to seduce one effectively.”
“Why do you need to mimic anything? It should be a natural response if you find her attractive. You thought Sophia was attractive, didn’t you?”
“Your work colleague?”
I nod.
“I was excited to meet a female, but only because I’d found a suitable one so quickly and I thought I’d be able to get it over and done with.”
“Over and done with!” I scoff. “That’s not the right attitude.”
“I know,” he sighs. “I’m trying to learn.”
I pat his knee, reassuringly. “I think you just haven’t met the right one yet.”
He uncrosses his legs and swivels to face me. “How do you go about it? I mean, what method do you use to seduce a female?”
I huff. “I’m afraid you’re looking at the wrong person, my friend.”
He scowls at me. “Who else should I look at if it’s you I’m speaking to? Besides, there’s no one else here.”
I laugh. “It’s just a figure of speech.” I get to my feet. “I’m making coffee, would you like one?”
“Does it come with sugar?”
“It certainly can. Have you eaten?”
He shakes his head.
“I don’t normally eat at this time of the day,” I tell him, “but I’m bloody starving.”
“Yes, I think I’m hungry too.”
“Think?”
He presses his palm to his stomach. “It feels uncomfortable inside here and it keeps making a strange gurgling noise.”
“Do you fancy pizza?”
He shrugs. “Whatever you’re having.”
I decide to pop out and pick one up, since it’s quicker than getting one delivered. I order my usual pepperoni with extra cheese and on my return Ray sniffs the air appreciatively. “That smells sublime!”
“Tastes even better.”
I drop the box on the coffee table and we each tear off a slice. “Oh, wow!” Ray enthuses, tomato sauce slathered down his chin.
I hand him a paper napkin. “Here. Wipe your mouth. You’re going to have to learn better eating habits if you’re going to take a girl out on a date.”
“How do I arrange to take a girl out?”
“First, you have to find the girl. Then you arrange the date.”
“And how do I find the girl?”
I shrug. “Dating app. Nightclub. Pub.”
“Which is the fastest method?”
“You’re very impatient, aren’t you?” I note.
“I am conscious of having only two nights on your sofa before I have to leave.”
I feel a pang of guilt at putting such a tight limit on how long he’s allowed to stay, but I still don’t understand his desperation to have sex. If he really is a virgin and he’s waited this long, why the sudden rush to get it over with? Why doesn’t he take his time and find the right girl? I don’t want to be guilty of rushing him into anything he might regret.
“Look, when I said a couple of nights, I only meant that this isn’t a permanent arrangement, but I don’t want you to feel pressured into making any hasty decisions. You want your first time to be special, don’t you?”
He lowers his head, declining to answer.
“Don’t you?” I repeat.
“It will be…an important event,” he replies cryptically.
“Well, I suppose losing your virginity always is, but you should still try to enjoy it.”
“I will try,” he tells me, but somehow I’m not convinced. It feels to me like he’s too desperate to get it over with and his next question only confirms my suspicion. “When can we begin looking for the girl?”
“We?”
“You said you’d help me.”
“If you want my help you’ll have to wait a few more days. Tonight’s my last night shift and then I’ve got a couple of weeks off before I switch back to the day shift. If you give me a few days for my body to readjust to daylight hours, I’ll help you find a girl.”
“How?”
“We can go out for a liquid lunch over at Canary Wharf, where all the sexy office workers are. How does that sound?”
He gives me a soft smile. “It sounds like a plan.”
“If you see a girl you like, maybe you could ask if she wants to go out clubbing with you one night and then take it from there.”
His smile broadens to a grin. “I like your plan, Blake.”
“Good, then it’s a date.” I blush at how that sounds. I’d like nothing more than to be going out on a proper date with this gorgeous boy, but I have to push those thoughts aside. I’m just accompanying him while he goes on the prowl. Still, I’m pleased I’ve persuaded him to take a breather before he rushes headlong into something he might regret. Even if it’s only a few days, it’ll still give him a chance to reflect on things. There’s something he’s not telling me. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but there’s a sadness about him. I only get a brief glimpse of it every now and then, but he’s hiding something and I’ve no idea what. Maybe once he gets to know me a little better, he’ll open up and chat to me about what’s bothering him. I’m convinced someone’s put him up to this. It feels almost as if he thinks he has something to prove. I wish I could get inside his head and figure him out.