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Chapter One
Claire
Narrowing my eyes, I watch him from my covert position inside the house. Even when we’re nowhere near each other, the man is still able to burrow his way deep under my skin. Like an itch I just can’t scratch. It’s irritating as hell.
No… he’s irritating as hell.
Someone needs to explain to me why he even bothered showing up today.
This is hardly his scene.
At this very moment, he’s lounging on the patio in a pair of vibrantly colored board shorts. His long, thickly muscled legs are stretched out lazily in front of him. Even though there’s a small smile curving his lips upwards, he can’t possibly be enjoying himself. He’s probably bored out of his ever-loving mind. This is, after all, some G-rated, Disney-esque family barbecue. This is hardly some wild, drunken orgy where women are going to be abandoning their bikinis in an hour or two because they’re so liquored up.
Just in case you were wondering- JT Higgins is more of a drunken orgy kind of guy. Trust me, my conclusions haven’t been drawn from a few questionable lapses in judgment on his part. Oh no. It’s taken years for him to cultivate this kind of reputation. He was already making a name for himself at whatever Big Ten university he attended before being drafted by Green Bay three years ago. He may play professional football, but he’s even more notorious for his alcohol induced antics, bar brawls, and of course, the females who flock to him in droves.
For the life of me, I can’t figure out why any self-respecting woman would actually want to be with him. Let alone broadcast it to the world at large. It’s a well-known fact that the guy dips his wick in anything that moves. Gross. The only possible upside I can see to all his activity is that he’s probably keeping some clinic in business with penicillin and swab tests.
And it’s not just groupies who lose their minds over him either. He’s been linked with his fair share of actresses and models as well. I think he was even seeing two chicks from the US Women’s National Soccer Team last year.
At the same time.
From what I read online, it didn’t end well.
“Why is who here?”
Not realizing that I must have muttered those words out loud, my brother’s wife, Gia, steps beside me before slowly scanning the backyard as if she can pick out who I’m talking about. Gently she bounces four-month-old baby Max in her arms.
Yanked right out of my thoughts, I try covering my slip up. “Hmmm? What? Did I say something?”
Since her arms are full of baby, she nods towards the patio where about seventy people are enjoying the early September sunshine. It’s definitely a loud, boisterous group. All football players and their wives or girlfriends and offspring. People are lounging in the pool or playing bocce ball in the sand pit. A volleyball net has also been set up on the wide, expansive back lawn. Others are just hanging out at the many tables that have been scattered around the brick paver patio.
This is the fifth year that my brother, Liam, has hosted a Labor Day party at his place. Everyone from the team is invited. Since it’s always more or less of an open house, friends and teammates will drop by throughout the day. The party starts around two, lasting well into the night before ending with a professional firework display.
This is my fourth year attending. It’s something I look forward to all summer long. Everyone always has a good time. Liam and Gia are gracious hosts and go out of their way to make everyone feel welcome and included. Plus, there’s plenty of food and drinks being served. If you walk away hungry at the end of this party, it’s your own fault.
Gia gives me a knowing look before asking again, “Who were you talking about?”
A slight blush creeps its way up my cheeks as the fib slides right off my lips. “No one. Just mumbling to myself.”
Narrowing her blue eyes, she gives me one of those deep speculative stares that under normal circumstances would leave me squirming on the spot. Thankfully she doesn’t push the issue.
As far as I’m concerned, JT is a complete ass. He’s definitely not worth wasting my breath on. Especially when there’s a party in full swing. I’m just going to ignore him. Should be simple enough. It’s not like I haven’t had lots of practice.
Out of all the players on the team, why did my brother have to take an interest in JT Higgins? It was bad enough having to run into him every so often at team events and functions, but now he seems to be hanging around all the time. It probably wouldn’t be so bad if he weren’t always trying to strike up a conversation.
But that’s exactly what he does.
Even though he knows perfectly well that I don’t care for him.
This is JT’s fourth season with Green Bay. Fingers crossed, it might just be his last. It seems as though the powers that be of the organization have finally had enough of his shenanigans.
JT was told at the end of last season to either shape up, or he was getting traded. That’s unfortunately when my brother decided to step in. I think the GM and coaches see my older brother as being settled and mature even though he’s only twenty-seven. Liam has been married for almost six years now and has three small kids. Ty who is five, Charlotte who is three, and baby Max. I think the higher ups were hoping that Liam would miraculously rub off on the younger man.
I narrow my eyes again.
Because it’s entirely possible that he has.
It’s been at least eight months since JT was involved in any kind of fight. He’s still photographed with women, but it doesn’t seem to be at the crazy extent it once was. And it’s never with the same woman twice. There’s a revolving door of them as if he just can’t choose one.
He even bought a house in the same gated community as my brother about six months ago. Which means that he is forever dropping by unannounced. Thankfully I don’t live here, so I miss a lot of that. But I usually have dinner with Liam, Gia, and the kids every Thursday night. It’s a family thing we’ve been doing ever since I moved out here to attend college three years ago. I’m all too aware that at the end of the day, family is all you have.
When I was ten years old, my mother just disappeared from our lives. One day we came home from school to find a note propped up on the kitchen table. My father couldn’t deal with her leaving and spiraled into his own abyss. Drinking. Job loss. Gambling. Eventually, we lost our house. My dad’s unreliability forced Liam to grow up fast and take responsibility for everything.
My other brother, Cullum, who is two years older than me, took her leaving the hardest. He also got the shortest end of the stick. To keep us financially afloat, Cullum ended up quitting wrestling and football so he could get a job and help financially support the family.
So yeah… I don’t take family lightly. I know exactly how important we are to one another. And Gia is now part of that family, too. She’s the sister I never had, but always wanted.
So getting together for family dinners on Thursday night is kind of our thing. Except for Cullum, who doesn’t live here, it’s a chance for us to all be in one place at the same time and talk about everything that’s going on in our lives. Even though school can get pretty busy, I make a point to never miss them.
What doesn’t make sense is that JT has started showing up to our Thursday night dinners. The first time, I thought it was merely a fluke. But then it happened the following week and the week after that. I have a difficult time even being civil to the guy. I’d prefer for our worlds to not collide, but apparently my wishes don’t matter because I swear he’s around more than ever before. So I do the only thing I can and grit my teeth all the while pretending he doesn’t exist.
Which is rude, I know.
But I don’t particularly care.
When JT first arrived in Green Bay, I was eighteen years old. I’d just moved here to attend the University of Wisconsin- Green Bay because my brother had been drafted as a quarterback three years earlier. And I wanted to get out of the city I’d grown up in. I could have easily gone to Barnett University like my brother, but I didn’t want that. I wanted a fresh start some place new. Plus, I’d wanted to be near Liam and his growing family.
So really, JT and I came here at the same time.
At that point, I knew absolutely nothing about him. Just because Liam plays football doesn’t necessarily mean I follow it.
I’ll freely admit that when I first glimpsed JT in person, I was completely bowled over. Say what you want about him- he’s absolutely gorgeous. Tall and muscular with a face that is angular and chiseled. All of that coupled with his shaggy blond hair that usually gets pulled back with one of those headband thingies that some guys wear for sports. I’m not into that kind of look, but he wears it well. Add in a blindingly white smile, unusual light green eyes, and a sexual magnetism that’s hard to resist and you have JT Higgins wrapped up neatly in a package with a bow.
Needless to say, he made my heart go pitter-patter the first time I caught sight of him. And I hadn’t had that kind of thing happen very often. If at all. Because academics have never come easy for me, I spent most of high school focused on my studies and little else.
Since JT was part of the Green Bay organization and I ended up attending a lot of team functions with Gia and Liam, I found myself coming into contact with him upon occasion. Almost all of the guys on the team treat me like something of a little sister. No one has ever hit on me or made me feel uncomfortable in any kind of sexual way. I don’t think they would dare mess with their QB’s little sister. Plus, I think they all know just how crazy protective Liam is regarding his family.
The exception to that, of course, would be JT.
Apparently, he didn’t get that memo.
Or he just doesn’t care.
The first time he came on to me, we were at some season opener party. He was actually there with a date. A tall, stunning model. But still… I could feel his eyes lingering on me as I floated around the room. Numerous times throughout the evening, he joined the same group of people I was talking to. As the event wore on, I noticed him becoming progressively drunker until he finally approached me, asking if I was interested in leaving with him.
And his date.
Ummm… no thanks.
And just like that, JT Higgins didn’t seem quite so great anymore. I have zero interest getting involved with, or even befriending, a guy like him.
The second time it happened was at a wedding. Since it had been about six months since I’d seen him last, I let the entire incident go. Chalked it up to him being young and new to the team.
But just like before, I could feel his eyes on me. As unaffected as I wanted to be, I wasn’t. His gaze felt like a physical caress. Gooseflesh continued to break out across my skin. When he finally approached, it was to offer me a drink and an elevator ride up to his room for the night. That’s when I knew my initial impression of JT Higgins was spot-on. The guy was a major player. Not to mention a jerk. And I wasn’t interested. No matter how spectacular looking he was.
You’d think at some point he would get it through his thick skull that it wasn’t going to happen between us, but no. The last three years have played out much the same. He has constantly hit on me, and I have continually shot down his offers.
Because I’m a big girl, and I can handle some guy who is nothing more than an irritant, I’ve never said one word to Liam or Gia about JT’s persistent pursuit of me. It’s more irksome than anything else. It’s not like JT has ever touched me or gotten handsy. I’d deck him if he did.
If Liam ever found out that JT was trying to hustle me into bed, he’d have a freaking cow. And I don’t want or need that. I’m trying to get the guy to loosen up where I’m concerned. He takes overprotective big brother to a whole new level. Plus, I really don’t want to be the cause of any problems between him and a teammate.
So I just let it go.
And steer clear when we’re thrown together.
Even though JT has apparently cleaned up his act, I secretly think it’s all a PR sham so that the organization doesn’t trade him at the end of this season. Although, I will say that ever since he stopped drinking, he’s also stopped hitting on me.
I’m so lost in thought that I don’t realize I’m still staring until clear green eyes collide with mine. A jolt of electricity spears through my entire body as my breath instantly becomes lodged at the back of my throat before I have the good sense to rip my gaze away.
Gia points towards a group of football players. “Looks like Ryan is here.”
Careful to avoid those unique green eyes, I cautiously glance back out the window only to find my boyfriend standing in the midst of all that testosterone.
He looks… completely awed by the company he’s keeping.
I’m not sure if I should be miffed or not that he didn’t bother finding me first to say hello.
I met Ryan freshman year. His dorm was situated next to mine, so I would see him frequently in the cafeteria or walking to and from class. He introduced himself after the first few weeks of school and occasionally we’d get together to study. Sometimes he would invite me to parties, but I always declined.
Ever since I could remember, school has always been a challenge for me. I’m not one of those people who can cram for a few hours and sail through a test with an A. In fact, that’s a surefire way for me to flunk an exam. I’ve always had to work harder and longer than any of my friends. And I knew college was going to be even more rigorous than high school. So instead of getting caught up in all the social stuff, I concentrated on my studies.
I’ve wanted to be an elementary school teacher since I was twelve years old. I’ve never even considered another career path. I also knew that getting into the program would be challenging. So I kept myself focused and sophomore year, I applied to the elementary education program and was accepted.
This year I’ll actually be student teaching. I’m excited to finally get into the classroom. Now that I’m in the program and have the first three years of college under my belt, I feel like I can finally loosen up on the reins just a smidge. Maybe even have a little more of a social life than I’ve allowed myself up until now. I have no plans to lose my head and go crazy, but maybe I can ease up just a bit and enjoying myself.
Which is precisely why I finally caved after three years of having Ryan hound me to go out with him. We’ve been seeing each other for about two months now. Although we are definitely not the kind of couple who has to spend every single waking moment together. Because we’re both busy, we usually see each other a few times a week. We go out to dinner, grab coffee, see a movie, or hit a few parties.
That kind of thing.
I’ve yet to invite him to stay over at my place now that I finally have an apartment off campus, even though he keeps hinting around at it.
I almost snort.
Alright, he does way more than hint around.
Up until this point, I just haven’t been ready to take our relationship that far. I don’t know what’s been holding me back, but something is. Maybe it’s just first time jitters.
I hate to admit that I’m a twenty-one-year-old virgin, but…
Yeah, I’m a twenty-one-year-old virgin.
It’s not like I planned for this to happen. I didn’t set out to save myself for someone special. I guess I’ve just been so focused on school and spending time with my brother and his family, that it hasn’t been a priority for me.
But now, suddenly, I’m a senior in college. And I’m still a virgin. It’s like I blinked and realized that I’ll be graduating this spring. When I confided in Holly, my roommate, she just about died before telling me that kids graduating from high school aren’t even virgins anymore. She claims I would be hard-pressed to find a junior or senior in high school who was still a virgin.
I think she might just be right about that.
So, yeah, I guess what I’m trying to say here is that I’m finally ready to be de-virginized.
Is that even a word?
Anyway, with the way things are going, I’m pretty sure Ryan and I are headed in that direction.
Just as I’m about to answer Gia, my eyes once again become ensnared by green ones. Another shiver slowly slinks its way down my spine as I yank my gaze away yet again.
I really wish he would stop watching me.
Forcing a bright smile, I say, “I’m going to head out and say hello to Ryan.” I tickle the baby still being held within Gia’s arms. At this point, Max’s eyes look to be a gorgeous deep gray. Even though they could still change at this point, I don’t think they will. Both Liam and I have the exact same shade of eye color.
“Want me to take Max?” There’s nothing I love more than being with my niece and nephews. The two older kids are bundles of boundless energy. I don’t know where they get it from. They’re exhausting, but in a good way.
Almost as soon as the words are out of my mouth, she’s dropping the baby into my arms. “Sure, why don’t you give him to Liam so I can get more food out onto the table. Looks like things are running low.”
“No problem.” I cuddle his soft little four-month-old body close to mine before inhaling a great big breath of baby in the process. As I do, everything within me instantly settles, just like it always does.
Max is like taking a handful of Xanax.
Totally addictive and completely necessary.
Especially when JT Higgins is in the vicinity.