When I wake up the next morning to find her gone, I realise my heart can’t take much more. Although I could just easily wait—and then we could be together—what I can’t abide is the fact that she’s being treated like my dirty little secret. Anyone who didn’t know us would jump to the same conclusion. They will all believe I am a dirty pervert and that she’s either been bewitched by me or is choosing to act inappropriately with a blatant disregard for decency. I’ve never once thought of her as anything other than the brave, beautiful soul that she is, and knowing what people will think of her in all this is what makes me act.

I don’t want to spend another day worrying like this. I can’t wake up again to find she’s snuck out so that we won’t be caught.

I’m done.

That’s why I’ve just made a phone call to someone I know in the Department of Education, expressing my wish to hand in my notice. I won’t be able to leave until Easter, but luckily, that’s only two weeks away. I just need to bide my time until then. I’ll stay until Sasha completes her exams, and then we’ll see. I don’t know what the future will hold, but whatever shape my future takes, I want it to involve Sasha. Maybe I’ll get another job close by, or maybe I can even convince her to move to Edinburgh with me, and I can teach there. What I can’t do any more is work in the school where the person I’ve fallen in love with is a student. If we’re caught, it will tear us both apart.

After the long phone call where my friend tried to convince me to continue teaching at the girls’ school, I immediately sit back in my chair and let out the deepest sigh on earth. I wait for the regret to come, but all I feel is relief.

Not wanting to wait another moment, I dial Sasha’s number to tell her, but there’s no answer. I leave a message on her voicemail and then decide to send a message as a back-up plan just in case she misses the voice message. After that I take a long, hot shower, make myself some very late breakfast and sit watching TV for a good two hours. Every now and then I’d pick up my phone wondering why she hadn’t texted or called. This was so unlike Sasha. She would always answer. Sometimes it was straight away, and sometimes an hour later, but she would always answer. I check the time. It’s been almost five hours and nothing.

That’s when it hits me that she could be in trouble. Mindlessly I go through my phone but I don’t have her home number. It will be in file at the school, but it’ll be quicker just to turn up at the door. I’ll be risking bumping into her mother, but that’s a risk I’m willing to take just to make sure Sasha’s okay.

My decision made, I put on my Nike trainers, grab my keys and bike helmet. I’m about to rush out the door when I hear my phone ring. I look down at the number, and a surge of relief hits me when I see “Sasha Calling” lighting up my phone.

Closing my eyes, I answer the call. “Sasha, thank God. I’ve been worried sick. Is everything okay?”

“Easton.”

My blood runs cold when I hear the sob escape her. “Laura?” I ask. “Laura, what’s wrong. Where’s Sasha?”

When I hear her say the next three words my world comes to an end.

“He’s taken her.”

“I’m on my way.”

Despite nausea wanting to erupt in my stomach, I leave my house and make the speediest ride of my life on the bike towards Sasha’s flat where I find at least four police cars in the parking lot. I run like the wind up to her flat where I’m immediately greeted by a policeman stopping me in my path.

“Excuse me, sir, who are you?”

“Laura!” I shout, ignoring him at first. “I’m a friend of the family. Laura’s expecting me. Laura!” I shout again and that’s when she appears a tissue in hand and tears streaming down her face.

“Easton,” she cries, rushing towards me and taking me in for a hug. She sobs into my shoulder. I feel helpless. What solace can I offer a woman that’s not only had her daughter taken from her once, but twice?

“How do you know he has her?” I ask, needing some sort of hope that this is all just some bad dream.

She pulls away sniffling and wiping her nose before she answers. “She called the police, but didn’t say anything. They tried calling back three times but she didn’t answer. She also left a note.” Her eyes look up to mine, and I can tell there’s more. “She said some things that I know she wouldn’t say. I know he’s made her say those things, but I just don’t know why.”

“Can I see it?”

She looks at the officer before looking back at me. “The police have it.”

“You’re Easton?” The officer asks, directing my attention to him. I nod my head. “She mentioned you in the note.” He looks at my mother again and my frustration levels hit new heights.

“I told you she would never say those things about Easton. She adores him.”

Any other time those words would make my heart soar, but right now I just want to know what the hell is going on.

“What did the note say?” I ask again.

The officer walks into the flat, so I follow suit. He motions to a lady who’s holding an evidence bag and she passes it to him. Once he has it in his hands he turns to me, handing the note in my direction. I take it from him and read it.

Mum,

I can’t go on like this. I feel suffocated and need my space. The pressure of exams is getting to me, and Easton is piling onto that pressure too. I just need some time away.

I’ll be in touch.

Ray. xx

Immediately, I look to Laura. “She wouldn’t write this.”

She nods. “I know.”

“She put her name down as Ray. She’s not Ray anymore.”

I watch with that pain in my gut as Laura hugs herself, fresh tears streaming down her face. “I think she signed that deliberately so that we knew.”

“We need to know her last movements so we can pinpoint a timeframe. CCTV cameras will hopefully pick up the rest.”

I bite my lip knowing I will have to tell them I was the last one to see her. Laura will know that we betrayed her trust. I had already felt guilty enough as it was earlier, but now—seeing her in so much pain—the guilt is amplified.

Closing my eyes, I let out a deep breath. “She was with me last night.” I hear nothing, so open my eyes and find the policeman and Laura staring at me. Laura doesn’t seem angry by the news. In fact she seems very calm under the circumstances.

“Are you her boyfriend?” The policeman asks. I nod my head. “And at what time did she leave you?”

I run my fingers through my hair, trying to think. “I’m a late riser, so I think it was around eight this morning.”

The officer looks from me to my mum. “And neither of you saw her from that time onwards?” We shake our heads. “Okay, I’ll let the relevant team know. I did notice on the way into the flat that there were cameras, so it’ll give us the time that they left. We’ve spoken to neighbours and none of them recall seeing or hearing anything out of the ordinary.”

I close my eyes again. This doesn’t make any sense. Unless of course he had a weapon of some sort to keep her quiet. I know Sasha and I know she would never go with him willingly.

Pain starts to radiate in the back of my head. All I can think about is my Sasha and that fucking arsehole together and it makes me feel sick to the stomach. She was happy, but I knew that deep down she always had that sense to look over her shoulder. No eighteen-year-old should ever have to go through something like that.

Ever.

“Please, just find her and bring her home. I don’t think I can go another three years of having her missing like before.”

The officer gives Laura a half smile before placing his hand on her shoulder. “I promise you we will do any and everything within our power to get your daughter back.” She timidly nods her head and the officer sees that as an opportunity to leave us.

“He should have been found and locked up ages ago!” she seethes.

“I couldn’t agree more.” She glances in my direction, but I can’t tell if she’s angry with me or not. I’m about to open my mouth when she puts her hand up. “Right now, I don’t care about what went down last night. All I care about is getting Sasha back.”

“Sir, we found this on the floor in her room!” I hear a woman shout.

I look to the source and see another lady handing the officer an evidence bag again. It looks to be another note or letter. He reads it and then looks in my direction before walking towards me.

“Does this mean anything to you?”

He hands me the bag, and I start reading. Laura peeks over my shoulder, so I bend the note down so she can read it too.

To Our Kiss

I was a lost girl sitting in the bar that day.

Given a dare, I decide to play.

A kiss, that's all I needed to ask.

At the time, it sounded like such a simple task.

One taste and that was all it took.

You read me like an open book.

The spell was cast; I was immediately under.

No reason, no rhyme, no need to wonder.

With that kiss, you showed me the beauty out of my despair.

You taught me to live again, laugh again, and have feelings to share.

You brought me out of my darkness and showered me in nothing but light.

So brilliant, so beautiful, so marvellous, so bright.

And I owe it all to that fateful kiss.

That left me reeling from your eternal bliss.

To my Nike rider, my feelings are so strong and true.

I should have told you this long ago:

I love you.

“It’s about you,” Laura begins. “Her teacher told her to write a poem involving something or someone dear to her heart.”

The police officer frowns at this. “So she writes a note saying that she needs space, but at the same time deliberately drops this poem on the floor for you to find.”

Despite the dire situation, I smile. She loves me.

She fucking loves me!

“She’s letting me know that the note she’s written is bullshit. He forced her to write that.”

“Of course he did,” Laura interjects. She places her head in her hands and starts to cry again. The police officer smiles timidly then gives us some space. “I’ve never wanted someone dead in all my life, but right now murdering that scumbag seems like a pretty good idea to me.”

I don’t know whether she wants it, but I wrap my arm around her. When she places her head in the crook of my neck I know I’ve done the right thing by comforting her.

“She’ll be okay,” I say, trying to soothe her as best I can. “She was with him for so long last time thinking you were dead. She knows that’s not the case now.” I pull away a moment and watch as she wipes her tears. “Listen, one of my brothers is a police officer. I’m not sure how much weight he can pull, but I’m going to ask if there’s any way he can help out from his end of things. Okay?”

She nods her head. “Thank you.”

Immediately I take my phone out and dial my brother’s number. “Easton,” he says after a couple of rings. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Sasha’s been taken again,” is all I say.

I hear him suck in a breath before saying. “What do you need from me?”

“The police here say they’re going to access CCTV, but I can’t just sit here and wait for them to follow leads. It could take them forever to get round to looking at cameras and by then he could have smuggled her to France or some shit.”

“Okay, tell me what road she lives on and a roundabout time she may have left. I’ll take it from there.”

Surprised, I say, “You can do that?”

“I’m not supposed to, but for you and Sasha, it’ll be worth it. I want her safe as much as you.”

Relieved, I smile and for the first time since finding out the tears start to brim in my eyes. “Thanks, brother.”

“Don’t mention it, kiddo. I saw the way you two looked at each other at Mum’s. You don’t get love like that these days.”

Love.

I feel it in my heart, my gut, and my head. Those three tiny insignificant words that mean so much but have never been said. I regret not telling her now. I wanted to so badly when she was wrapped up in my arms last night, but I held my tongue. I regret that now.

“I’m going to marry her one day,” I say, completely surprising myself again.

“Too fucking right you are,” he answers, laughing. “Listen, let me get to work. What’s the name of the road and what time should I be looking from?”

“It’s a block of flats called Brentwood and it’s on the Telgarth Road. She left my house around eight this morning, so I’m figuring he would have forced her into a car around an hour later. Can you check from eight … just in case?”

“On it,” he says, before hanging up. The minute he does I let out a sigh of relief and turn to find Laura sitting on the sofa biting her nails. She looks lost. Immediately, I go to her, sit down and take her hand. She looks up to me with pleading eyes. I wish I could take this all away from her. She should never have endured this the first time, let alone a second.

“Don’t tell anyone here, but my brother’s going to check CCTV for me. If he has any leads he’ll call me.”

She closes her eyes on a sigh. “Oh, thank God. After last time I don’t have much faith that they’ll find her again.” She then starts to sob. “I can’t lose her. Not again, Easton. Not again.”

I pull her into my arms. “Shh. It’s okay, Laura. I’m going to do everything I can to get her back, okay? Even if I die trying.”

She clutches onto my arm like it’s the only thing she has left to hold onto. My heart aches, but it aches for her too. I can’t even begin to imagine what hell she’s going through. I can only imagine my hell.

“Thank you,” she whispers. I nod my head. “I know it’s technically wrong for the two of you to be together right now, but she loves you. I know she does. I feel guilty for having taken away the one good thing in her life, but I did it to protect her.”

“I know,” I say, interrupting her. “That’s why I quit this morning.”

Her eyes widen. “You did what?”

“I quit my job. I know it’s only three more months, but I couldn’t stand the fact that it felt like I was treating her as some dirty little secret when she means so much more to me than that.”

She swallows hard, more tears coming. “You did that for her.”

“I’ve lived my life, Laura. If I lost my job then I still have experience enough to find another. Sasha’s only just scratching the surface. I can’t be the one to get in the way of that. If she wants me, then I’m here for her. I just need to take that step back and allow her time to shine.”

“Oh, Easton,” Laura sobs, covering her mouth.

“We’re going to go,” the officer says. When Laura and I both look up, he says, “We’ve got everything we need, so we’re heading out. As soon as I know anything I’ll call. Will you be okay, Laura?”

She nods her head. “I’ll be fine.”

“I’ll stay with her,” I offer. When Laura nods with a smile the officer says his goodbyes and one by one all of them leave. I’m about to offer Laura a cup of tea when my phone rings. When I look down and see it’s my brother, I answer quickly.

“I managed to find her. She was in the passenger seat of a green Landrover with a man who looks to be in his late thirties driving north along the M6. I’ll keep following their route and see where it leads me.”

I close my eyes in relief. We’re a long way off finding her, but at least it’s a start. “Let me know where they’re heading. I’m going to start out now and see if I can follow the trail.”

“Got it,” he answers, hanging up.

“Did he find something?” Laura takes my hand and looks at me expectantly.

“Yes, he saw them in a car together heading north along the M6. I’m going to start out and see if I can find them.”

I get up and Laura gets up with me. “I’m coming with you.”

“I only have a motorbike.”

“I don’t care. I’m coming with you.”

I nod my head. “Okay. In her room there should be her pink helmet. Go grab it and we’ll get going.”