Brooke’s heart hammered against her ribs. Yes, she’d just committed to sex with this man. For real. But she wanted it, and she intended to get there as soon as possible with him. He did things to her insides that made her warm and tingly. He also made her feel safe and protected.

Would it all change if they had sex? Possibly, and that’s what scared her. But, right now, the drive to be with him was strong. Shockingly strong, because while she’d missed sex over the past couple of years, she’d never actually had the desire to do it with anyone.

Until now. And oh my stars how she wanted it.

Cade grinned that sexy grin of his. “You just let me know when you’re ready, angel. I’ll take care of the rest.”

There was something comforting about that idea. Letting him take charge and take control while all she had to do was feel. It was also frightening since the last time a man had been in charge, she’d had no say in what happened to her.

Tell him.

She bit the inside of her lip. Yes, she needed to tell him, but she wasn’t quite ready for that yet. Soon. Her turmoil must have shown on her face because his expression grew serious.

“I mean that, Brooke. When you’re ready. If that means an hour from now or a month from now, I’ll still be waiting.”

“And if it means a year from now?” Because she had to ask. Not that it was going to take a year, but what if Cade wasn’t as serious as he pretended to be? Shouldn’t she know that now?

He blew out a breath. “I’m not gonna lie. It won’t be easy to wait a year—but if I have to, then I have to. Just don’t shut me out now that we’ve progressed to actual conversations, okay? If you try to take this back to text only, that will be a big problem for me.”

He made her heart wallow in warm fuzzy feelings. “I’m not taking you back to text, Cade. Though I can’t promise never to send you a dirty emoji.”

“I look forward to your dirty emojis, angel. Though not today.”

“No, not today.” Because she didn’t think she could handle that either. Sexting him when he was in her condo? No way.

“You want to get out of here for a little while?”

Her heart thumped. “What do you have in mind?”

“I need a change of clothes. Thought we could ride over to my place so I could get some things.”

She loved how he didn’t push her to talk about her experience or to move forward faster than she was comfortable with. He told her about his mother, set it out there for her to examine, and then moved on. He was patient and calm, and he managed to gift some of that calm to her.

“Sounds like a plan.” She had work to do, but she could get to it later. And maybe getting out for a while would be a good thing.

“You want to take Max?”

“That would be nice, if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t or I wouldn’t have asked.”

Some people wouldn’t want the dog hair in their car. But Cade didn’t seem to care even though he had a big, beautiful truck with a black interior that was about to get haired up. Brooke sighed. Was it possible to fall in love with a man you hardly knew?

Stop being silly. It’s lust.

Yes, it was definitely lust. But she also liked him a lot. Maybe she needed to be careful about that though. Because what if she started liking him too much and he didn’t return the feelings? Sure, it was fun now, but it was still new. What about when it wasn’t? Or when he got sick of her insecurities?

“How about we grab lunch while we’re out? I know a place near the bay where we could take Max.”

“That sounds amazing,” she said.

“Then get your purse and your dog, angel. Let’s get started on our fun-filled day.”

---

Two hours later, they were eating lunch at a little restaurant by the bay. They sat on the deck overlooking the water, and Max lay at Brooke’s feet and watched the sailboats glide by. It was a warm day in spite of it being late September, and the sun shone down overhead. They sat at a table beneath an umbrella and ordered shrimp and crab cakes along with slaw and french fries.

The food was delicious, the setting perfect, and the company gorgeous. Brooke told stories about her marketing clients, laughing and using her hands to illustrate a point. Cade sipped his water and watched her. She was beautiful with her baby blues and her long blond hair. Her smile was infectious, and he found himself smiling more than he usually did. Because she made him want to.

Of course, there was a low-level humming in his veins, a spark and sizzle of attraction that wanted to roar into a flame—and would with the right incentive. He was mindful of what she’d said earlier, when she’d asked if he would wait a year to have sex with her. The question had shocked him and challenged him.

Because he wanted her now. He could wait, but how long? How long?

As long as it took was the answer that came back to him, especially sitting here with her now, listening to her talk about sperm stress balls and sperm pens and sperm mouse pads. She laughed about sourcing those things for a client, and he laughed with her.

A breeze blew in softly from the water, ruffling her blond hair. She tucked a stray piece behind her ear and stabbed her fork into her crab cake. She didn’t miss a beat as she ate and talked and dealt with her hair.

He thought of all the guys in HOT who’d gotten married lately. Hell, even the colonel had tied the knot. Cade had always thought he wanted that, but he’d never found anyone he’d remotely want to spend that kind of time with.

And he couldn’t say that Brooke was any different really, because they’d been together in person for less than twenty-four hours. But she was funny and sweet and vulnerable without being helpless. Brooke was anything but helpless, no matter what she thought.

She knew her foibles and she fought them. That was more than many people could claim. But she also sold herself short over them.

“Well, I think I’ve exhausted the topic of sperm. What do you have to talk about?” she asked.

Cade stole one of her french fries. “Nothing as interesting as sperm.”

“But you’re familiar with the topic.”

“Intimately.”

Brooke rolled her eyes. “I see what you did there. Niiiice, Cade Rodgers with a D.” She nibbled a fry. “We’ve talked about a lot of stuff through text. But not everything. I’m assuming you don’t have a girlfriend, though I don’t actually know that.”

“Do you really think if I had one, I’d be jerking off to your dirty texts?”

“Maybe. Some people are kinky that way.”

“Yeah, and what did I tell her when I spent the night with you last night?”

“Mission planning,” she shot back.

Cade shook his head. He had to give her points for that. “Good one, angel. Yeah, I could have done that. Hell, I could have a wife and six kids stashed away somewhere—but I don’t. Too much trouble to try to sneak around.”

She propped her chin on a hand and gazed at him. Damn, she was pretty. “I believe you. Just had to tease you a little bit.” She sighed. “Okay, that’s not completely true. The truth is it’s something I’m a little paranoid about. I dated a guy for eight months and I thought we were getting serious, but it turned out he really did have a wife and kid stashed away. He spent the week working in DC and took the train to New York every weekend. He told me he was spending time with his elderly parents, but of course he was going home to his wife.”

Cade wanted to punch the guy for her. “How did you find out?”

She frowned. “His wife came to DC to surprise him one day. She’d left the kid with his parents, who weren’t all that elderly, and taken the train down. I answered his apartment door while wearing his shirt. We’d ordered food, you see…”

“Ouch.”

She nodded. “Yep, it was awkward. She lost it, of course. Surprisingly, she didn’t seem all that pissed at me. It was him she took her fury out on. So, yeah, I locked myself in the bathroom, threw on my clothes, and got the hell out.” She gave him a look. “I didn’t really think you had someone, by the way. Grace would have told me. I guess I sometimes still feel pretty ashamed about what happened. I could have just told you without the drama, right?”

He reached for her hand across the table and squeezed softly. “You told me, angel. That’s all that matters.”

She squeezed his hand in return. “I’m full of drama and weirdness, Cade. You should really rethink this whole thing. Even when I try to be normal, drama finds me. I attract it like a magnet.”

He didn’t believe shit like that for a second. But she clearly did. “I’ve thought about you a lot. And I’m right where I want to be.”

She still didn’t try to extract her hand. Her touch was electric, singing through him like a living current. He could only imagine how good it would be if they were pressed together with nothing between them but skin.

“You’re too good to be true,” she said. “Do you know that?”

“No, I’m not. I’m just really, really patient when I want something. And I definitely want you.”

Her pretty features clouded. “I’m nothing special, Cade. You’ll be disappointed if you think so.”

“Why don’t you let me be the judge of that?”

She shrugged and dropped her lashes over her eyes. “Well, don’t say I didn’t tell you when the time comes.”

“You know what I think, Brooke?”

She lifted her head. “What?”

“I think you’re full of shit.”

He didn’t expect her to crack up, but she did. “You don’t mince words, do you? You just tell it like it is.”

“For the most part.” He leaned toward her. Her eyes widened just a little. Her gaze dropped to his mouth. Excellent. “Here are some words for you, angel. Take note… You and I are going to be epic together. Fucking epic. You think your vibrator is any match for my tongue and cock? You’re gonna find out what you’ve been missing, and you’re gonna kick yourself for waiting so long. Trust me.”

He watched the flush crawl up her throat. “You…” She cleared her throat, and he could tell she was thinking about it. In detail. “You’re awfully sure of yourself, aren’t you?”

“Satisfaction guaranteed, angel. Think about it.”

He waved the waitress over and asked for the check. Brooke stared at him the entire time. The wheels were turning. That was enough.

---

Cade paid for their meal even though she tried to whip out her credit card first. She thanked him, and he came to pull her chair out for her. Max got to his feet, tail wagging, and they set off for the parking lot.

Except, when they got outside the restaurant, Cade didn’t head for his truck. Instead, he started toward a path that went along the bay. “Let’s take Max for a stroll. Unless you don’t want to.”

“No, that sounds good.” She let out Max’s retractable leash and he ranged ahead of them, sniffing grass and peeing on everything he could find. She should make him heel, but he was having too much fun—and so was she—so she let him keep going.

The water rippled with the breeze, sparkling in the sunshine. Sailboats plied the bay, schooners and skipjacks looking like something from a postcard as they moved along. There was a lighthouse in the distance, an old Chesapeake Bay structure with a squat silhouette. Not at all like what you normally thought of when you thought of lighthouses.

People jogged along the path with some regularity. They also encountered couples strolling with babies and many others walking their dogs.

“I like it here,” Brooke said as the breeze ruffled her hair. She’d never considered moving this far from the action of DC, but maybe she should have. Except for those days when she needed to meet with clients in the city, and then traffic would be a total bitch.

“I don’t live too far from here,” Cade said.

Brooke stopped and faced him. “Really? Wow, isn’t this a distance from work?”

“About twenty miles. I like to get away from it all when I’m done for the day. And when we get home from a mission, I like to be removed from the job as much as possible.”

The day was pleasant, non-threatening, which had to account for why she blurted out her question the way she did.

“Are you ever scared?”

He frowned. “You mean when I’m on a mission?”

She nodded.

“Yes. And no.” He shrugged. “It’s always there, in your mind, that this could be it. But you can’t dwell on it because you’re the best-equipped, best-trained motherfuckers out there. You kick ass, get the job done, and win. There’s no room for fear because that shit will mess you up. But of course it’s there, in the back of your brain. You just wall it off from what you need to do and get busy doing it.”

“You make it sound so easy.” She wished she knew how to wall off the fear. If she could do that, she’d have it made.

“Angel, I’ve trained for a long time. Hard training. You can’t do what I do and get emotional about it.”

Brooke swallowed. A cloud drifted over the sun, making everything a little darker. A little cooler. It brought back to her, forcefully, what he did when he went on a mission. There was violence. Men who killed. And women. She thought of Victoria Brandon, who she knew was a sniper, and her blood ran cold. How could Victoria do that? How could she pull the trigger, knowing the person on the other end would die?

But they all did it. Victoria, Garrett, Cade. All of them. Grace didn’t seem to have trouble with it. Didn’t even dwell on it other than worrying about Garrett when he was on a mission.

“Can you teach me how to wall it off?” she asked.

He gave her a sad smile. “You don’t need to do that yet, Brooke. You need to deal with it first and then you can learn to wall it off.”

Annoyance slid through her. “I’ve been dealing with it for two years,” she snapped. “I think I can be the judge of when I’m finished, thanks.”

He held up both hands, and guilt sliced her soul. “Whatever you want, angel. I’m not trying to tell you what to do. Just telling you what I observe.”

The sun emerged from behind the cloud, but the mood was ruined. No amount of sunshine was bringing it back right now.

“Can we get going? I need to work on a couple of proposals when I get home.”

His gaze was solemn, as if he was disappointed in her. It made her both angry and guilty at the same time. Why was she taking her insecurities out on him? And why was he pushing her when he knew she was having trouble?

“Whatever you want, Brooke. You’re calling the shots here, not me.”

She got the feeling he wasn’t just talking about their day out. He was talking about everything between them. Somehow that wasn’t a comfortable thought at all. Because if anyone was going to mess it all up, it would be her.