Brooke stared out the window on the way back to her condo. She couldn’t think of anything to say now that she’d basically told Cade the worst thing that had ever happened to her. In the scheme of things, it could have been much worse. She hadn’t endured something so terrible she couldn’t get over it. So many people endured so much worse than that.

She’d been groped. Violated. Threatened with violence. She’d gone from a world in which everything made sense to her, in which her choices were her choices and no one could force their will upon her, to a world in which she was no longer safe. She’d learned in the space of a heartbeat that she wasn’t really in charge of what happened to her, and it had terrified her.

She didn’t trust people. Didn’t trust their motives. It had taken her almost two years to work up to dating a man, to being alone with him. Scott hadn’t been threatening, but she’d still had to force herself to see him the first time. When there’d been no spark, she’d blamed herself and gone on another date.

But she’d quickly realized she wasn’t ever going to get to a place where there were sparks with him.

There were sparks with Cade. Lots of sparks. Cannons of sparks. He didn’t scare her on a physical level, though his life as a warrior scared her. How did Grace stand it? How did she watch Garrett go off on a mission and not lose her mind?

Brooke asked herself if it was worth the risk getting involved with him would mean. But she was already involved. She’d told him her darkest secret, the thing that had kept her up at night for so long. The thing that had made her feel broken. It wasn’t just the violent way she’d been ripped from her bed and threatened. It was the way she’d had no control over who had touched her body and how.

Cade said it was rape. There was a certain comfort in having someone believe her and in being free to call it by so violent a name. She’d been raped. Not in the conventional way, not for long, but a man had shoved his fingers into her body and told her he was going to do whatever he wanted to her.

That he’d never gotten the chance didn’t change the fact he’d violated her body. Or the feelings she’d carried for so long. Why hadn’t she told Dr. Higgs what had happened? Dr. Higgs would have understood. It was her job to understand.

But Brooke had always been intimidated by the doctor. From the moment Dr. Higgs had seen her shortly after she’d been rescued, Brooke had thought that the doctor was a woman who couldn’t possibly be anything but in control of her circumstances. She was just too confident and self-aware.

Brooke sighed and rubbed her temple. That was a crock of shit and she knew it. Anyone could be ripped from what they knew and thrust into a nightmare. Anyone.

“You okay?”

She gritted her teeth and then turned to Cade with as sunny a smile as she could muster. “Of course.”

He flexed his fingers on the wheel, and she knew he didn’t believe her. Cade knew her pretty well for someone who’d only been in her life a short time.

“Not really,” she admitted. “I’ve fought myself for so long, rejecting the term rape because it seemed too strong. Like it made me a crybaby when other women have gone through worse. I’m mad at myself for it and mad I didn’t tell Dr. Higgs. Maybe I could have avoided wallowing in self-pity for so long if I had.”

“Angel, self-pity is allowed when you’ve gone through something traumatic. Nobody gets to tell you how to feel.”

She stared at him in amazement. “Why do you make me feel so normal?”

He glanced at her. “Because you are. If you were locked up in your house, refusing to leave, not eating or showering or taking your dog out for a walk—well, then I’d say you weren’t normal. But you are. This is life, angel. It’s what we do.”

They turned into the parking garage of her building and drove to her guest spot. Cade grabbed his backpack and waited for her to precede him into the building. She swiped her key card at the entry and the door opened.

“Do you need a card for entry everywhere?” he asked from behind her.

“This is the only other entry, besides the lobby, but that’s staffed twenty-four hours a day. You need a card to get into the building from the garage.”

“But you can walk into the front entry without one.”

“Yes, but visitors are supposed to check in.”

“Supposed to. Presumably they don’t have to.”

“No, I guess they don’t. But if a guard didn’t recognize someone, he would ask for identification.”

Cade looked thoughtful. “What about service entrances? What are the procedures there?”

Brooke frowned. She hadn’t considered that. What if Scott’s killer hadn’t passed the front desk after all? Could he have just entered the building through one of the delivery entrances? “I don’t know. Do you think that’s how the man came in?”

“It’s possible. Or it’s possible he didn’t use his real name when he checked in.”

“You mean he had a false name and Scott either knew it was fake or only knew him by that name?”

“Either one. But the service entrance seems the more likely route if he didn’t want to be seen.”

They reached the elevator and stepped in. Max sat quietly as Cade punched the button for her floor.

“But wouldn’t there be some sort of security procedure for the service entrance?”

“Should be. But maybe he paid somebody off.”

“You make it all sound like cloak-and-dagger stuff.”

His eyes were troubled. “It’s my job to think that way. But angel, you don’t really think it was a random event, do you? Scott Lloyd was involved in something or knew something he shouldn’t. It’s the most logical explanation.”

Brooke put her hand on Max’s head for comfort. “I know. But that doesn’t mean I like it. What if I’d been with him? What if that man had shown up the night Scott wanted me to have dinner with him?”

“But he didn’t. Don’t dwell on the what-ifs.”

She knew he was right, though the thought lived in the back of her mind. Part of the reason she didn’t want to be alone just yet. But Cade had a life, and he wasn’t staying forever. She would have to get her shit together soon if she was going to face the nights alone.

“I know you’re right. I just get a little paranoid, I guess.”

“Understandable. But don’t let it eat you up inside. Besides, I’m here. Nobody’s getting through me, Brooke.”

The steel in his words made her shiver. “You’ll have to go home soon. Back to your life.”

“I’m right where I need to be. Where I want to be. And I’m staying as long as you need me.”

She shook her head. “Don’t say that to me, Cade. I’ll ask you to stay for much longer than I should. Just because I hate being alone.”

---

They ordered takeout, then settled in to watch a movie together. They sat on Brooke’s couch while Max lay on the floor nearby. When Cade lifted his arm and put it on the back of the couch, he gave Brooke a significant look. It was up to her whether or not to sit next to him. When she scooted into the circle of his embrace, he was both pleased and stunned.

She’d been through a lot, more than she’d told anyone else, and he was well aware how traumatic it had been for her. He was still pissed that some asshole motherfucker had violated her body. He’d been thinking hard about how he was going to approach the two of them getting physical, and he finally decided that the way to do it was to make his intentions known and then let her make the final decision.

She snuggled against his side as a romantic comedy began to play. Not his typical type of thing, but he’d let her choose it. He regretted it the instant the sexy scenes started. They weren’t porn or anything, but they featured a naked actress with bouncing boobs pretending to fuck a guy silly.

He wouldn’t mind being fucked silly right about now. Except this was Brooke, and she wasn’t likely to consider such a proposition just yet. Hell, maybe not ever. Which was a depressing thought if he let himself dwell on it.

“Sorry,” she said after the second scene of people pretending to fuck. “Maybe this was a bad idea.”

“It’s giving me ideas, but I can handle it,” he told her gruffly.

She pushed herself upright and looked at him. “I’m not sure I can.”

Jesus, he wanted to kiss her. But he wouldn’t. Let her make the first move. “Then let’s find something else.”

“How about Doctor Who? That’s pretty unsexy.”

“Never seen it,” he admitted.

Her eyes widened. “Never seen Doctor Who? Seriously? Oh my God, Cade! You have no idea what you’re missing!”

She was so excited that he began to get curious. He’d heard of Doctor Who. Of course he had. He’d just never watched it.

“We have to start with season one of the reboot, which is the ninth doctor—” She waved a hand before he could ask what the hell she meant. “Never mind, don’t worry about it. You’ll catch on soon enough. But it’s cheesy at first, okay? Production values get much better as the series goes on. It’s like the BBC sent up a test balloon, the cheapest one they could find, and when it did well, they suddenly threw a massive budget behind it. Anyway, Doctor Who is amazing. You’ll love it, I promise.”

He didn’t know if he would, but he wasn’t going to tell her that. “Then I guess I have to see it.”

She grabbed the remote and started scrolling through her programs. “You really do. But if you don’t love it, just tell me, okay? We can find something else.”

He loved that she cared whether or not he liked her show. And there was no fucking way, even if he hated the damned thing, he’d ever tell her differently. Not when it made her sparkle with happiness like this.

“I’m all in, babe. Let’s do this.”

Somewhere around the fifth episode, she fell asleep. He could tell because of the way her body went limp against his. She’d been right though—the show was interesting as hell. The Doctor had his hands full with Rose and all the adventures they went on. Cade finished the episode, then turned everything off and gently picked up Brooke. She put her arms around his neck and curled herself into him as he carried her to bed. He wanted nothing more than to climb in there with her, but that wasn’t the best idea because he’d want to do more than lie next to her. So he put her down and pulled up the covers.

She mumbled something but didn’t wake. He left her there and went out to clip on Max’s leash and take him out one more time. Bert was at the desk and they chatted a bit. Cade asked about procedures for the service entrance. Bert was happy to fill him in. There was a list of the contractors who were allowed daily access. They didn’t have key cards, but they had identification credentials that allowed them inside once they were checked against the list. Which meant that the man who’d killed Scott Lloyd had either had connections that’d gotten him on the list or he’d bribed someone.

Max did his business and Cade took him upstairs, waving Brooke’s key card over the door to get inside. His phone rang a few seconds later. It was Hacker.

“Been doing some digging,” Hacker said. “You aren’t going to believe this shit.”

Cade’s gut tightened. “What?”

“Black Eagle Firearms is being investigated for possible weapons sales to drug cartels in South America. Entire caches of weapons missing from the shipping manifests—and Scott Lloyd just returned from South America a couple of days ago.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah. The ATF and DEA were working this one together. Ivy McGill Erikson is lead on the DEA side.”

Ivy was married to Dane “Viking” Erikson, the leader of the first SEAL team to join HOT. Which meant cooperation was presumably easier to come by than if they went in cold. That was a plus at least.

“Any idea who bought the weapons? Or where they are?”

“Andreas Lopez is the man Lloyd met in Bogota. He’s with the Espinoza Cartel. But so far as we know, the cartel hasn’t received any new weapon shipments lately.”

“Any ID on the man in the security footage from Brooke’s building?”

Hacker hesitated a moment. “That’s the funny part, Saint. There is no man in the footage. It’s been erased in two spots, presumably his entrance and exit. There’s nothing to tie him to Lloyd’s murder.”

“Nothing except Brooke Sullivan.”

“Pretty much.”

Cade didn’t like the way his stomach twisted at the news. “So how was it done? Somebody hack in? Or an inside job?”

Hacker sighed. “That I don’t know yet. But I do know this. You better watch out for Brooke. Right now she’s the only person who can ID the man who shot Scott Lloyd.”