Chapter Two
Lindsay
At the end of my shift, I gather my things and make a beeline for the door. Customers begin to file in again, and I quicken my steps before the boss asks me to stay a bit longer. I would gladly do over time, since I need the money, but not today. I’m ready to drop because of exhaustion, and I haven’t seen much of my daughter in a week. Running from one job to the other is taking its toll.
Sitting in my ancient Toyota, I take out my phone, remembering that Amanda had called. There’s a voice message. “Let’s hear what it’s about.” As I listen to Amanda’s excited voice, a smile appears on my lips. She was always so full of energy. By the end of the message, my smile has fallen away. My heart begins to race. It’s not because Amanda has just said she’s getting married. That’s great; I’m happy for her. The problem is that she wants to have the wedding here. That means her brother will be here as well. “Oh, my God,” I whisper, as memories overtake me and I spiral back into the past. The last time I saw Ethan Taylor was almost four years ago.
I was eighteen, graduating high school. I found out from Amanda that Ethan would be flying in from Texas to attend our graduation. Excitement to see him after so many years mounted in my chest. It wasn’t because I grew up around him and he was a great guy, but because I had a massive crush on him. I had since the day I hit puberty and was old enough to know what goes on between boys and girls. Ethan was five years older, so I knew I didn’t have a chance. I didn’t mind admiring him from afar and in secret, though. Not even Amanda, who I told everything to, knew I was in love with her cool older brother.
Ethan was always nice to me. The day he left for college, I was heartbroken. I wouldn’t set eyes on him again until my graduation. By that time, he was an up and coming NFL player. I didn’t like football much, but I kept up with it because of Ethan. I didn’t see him during the ceremony, but knowing he was in the crowd watching made me sweat just a little.
After graduation, I finally saw him. He was talking with a few of his old high school friends. I was alone with my gushing parents. My mother fussed over me as usual, fixing my collar and smoothing my hair.
“Mom, stop fussing. Have you forgotten I’m eighteen now?”
My father chuckled, pride shining in his eyes. “Leave her be, Janice. She wants to go and chat with her friends.”
“And don’t forget that I’m going to Amanda’s party after, daddy,” I reminded him.
He sighed, not too happy about me attending some wild graduation party. “Right,” he murmured. “Just be careful, sweetheart, and don’t stay out too late.”
“Okay, daddy.” I kissed him on the cheek and skipped off, flying high on my excitement. I had just completed a major life milestone. Exhilaration coursed through me, giving me the courage I needed to approach Ethan.
He had his back turned as I came to a stop behind him. “Um, h-hi Ethan.” The words came out so low than I didn’t think he had heard me. But he turned and looked down from his six feet, four inches height. He seemed not to recognize me for a second, and then recognition flashed in his mesmerizing green eyes. I could tell he was shocked. Anyone would be if they had known the skinny kid with braces I was years ago. At eighteen I had grown into my own. I didn’t look too bad with my five foot seven slender frame and full breasts.
“Lindsay? Holy hell, I barely recognize you.” He looked me over from head to toe appreciatively, and then pulled me into an embrace. He pulled back and studied me. “Look at you, all grown up.”
I blushed. “I’m happy to see you, Ethan. How are you?”
“I’m alright. It’s great to see you, too. Congratulations on graduating. You’ll be at my sister’s party, right?” I nodded. “Great. We can catch up later then, huh?”
“Uh, y-yeah, of course.” I blushed again, annoyed that I had been reduced to a stuttering idiot. So much for the air of sophistication I tried to put forth.
All through Amanda’s party, I searched for Ethan. He was nowhere to be seen. Disappointed, I had detached myself from a group of girls and stepped into the backyard. Thankfully, everyone preferred to stay in the air-conditioned house, so I had a moment’s peace. Parties weren’t my thing, but I couldn’t miss my best friend’s party. She would never forgive me.
“Bored with the party already?”
I gasped and wheeled around, clutching my chest. “Oh, Ethan, you scared the hell out of me.”
He chuckled. “Sorry.” He was reclining on one of the patio chairs with a beer in his hand.
“I didn’t get bored. I just wanted a little quiet, you know?”
Ethan sighed and sat up. “Oh, yeah, Lindsay, I know the feeling. I haven’t had this much peace and quiet in a while. I prayed that none of Amanda’s giggling friends made their way to the backyard.”
My shoulders fell. I supposed I was in the category of giggling friend. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know anyone was out here. I’ll go back in.” I turned to leave.
“Lindsay, wait. I didn’t mean you. You can stay. Have a seat, kid. We haven’t talked since you were what, fourteen?”
“Yup. But I’m not a kid anymore.” I took the chair beside him and crossed my legs. My dress hiked up to expose my thighs.
He cocked a brow. “I can see that,” he drawled. I nearly swooned when his lips curled upward. “Skinny little Lindsay Williams is now a woman. I bet you have boys fighting over you.”
My cheeks colored. “I wouldn’t say that. I mean, I’m okay looking I guess, but the boys aren’t interested in girls who like art and reading. They prefer blonde cheerleaders with big boobs like you do.”
Ethan stared at me, and I was afraid I had offended him. Me and my big mouth. When he let out a roaring laugh, I smiled. “What gives you the idea that I like blondes with big breasts, Lindsay?”
“I watch TV and read magazines,” I said, with a shrug. “Mr. Big Shot Quarterback dating some dancer, model or the other. I know your type, Ethan.”
He smirked. “I see your mouth has grown just as well as the rest of you.”
I let out a giggle and quickly clamped a hand over my mouth. “I almost forgot, you don’t want any of your sister’s giggling friends disturbing your peace.”
He tilted his head and gave me a strange look. “I suppose your giggle is fine. It’s cute.”
There was a look in his eyes that I couldn’t identify at the time. The way he continued to stare at me was disconcerting. I squirmed in my seat. “What?”
He blinked. “Nothing, I just- you’re- nothing.”
“Come on, Ethan. You can tell me. It’s not like I’m some stranger.”
He sighed. “I find myself attracted to you, Lindsay, and it feels wrong.”
My heart leaped and I sat erect. “What’s so wrong about that?”
“I’m twenty-three years old, Lindsay.”
“And I’m eighteen.” My voice sounded breathless. I couldn’t believe Ethan had admitted that he was attracted to me.
“I watched you grow up with my sister, for Christ-”
I have no idea what gave me the courage to move, but I was suddenly perched on Ethan’s lap, kissing him. My lips moved over his with a confidence that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. I had only ever been kissed once before, and the thought crossed my mind that Ethan would find my lack of skill less than impressive. Self-consciousness replaced bravado, and I began to pull away.
Ethan’s arm wound around my waist, holding me to him. Apparently he was enjoying the kiss as much as I was. A small moan of pleasure escaped my lips and Ethan gently pushed me away, as if his senses had returned. He sprang up.
“Shit. That wasn’t supposed to happen.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “You should go inside, now,” he roared.
“Ethan-”
“Go, Lindsay!”
I stood up, lips trembling. “I-I’m sorry.” Utterly humiliated, I wheeled around. Instead of going inside the main house, I headed for the pool house. To my relief, the door was open. I sank onto the couch and sobbed. I had foolishly believed Ethan was into me, after he’d seen that I was an adult and admitted that he was attracted to me. I froze when the slight creak of the door announced someone’s arrival. I knew it was Ethan without looking up. Keeping my head down, I tried to hide my tears. I felt ridiculous for crying, and had no doubt he would think me an idiot as well. I heard the click of the lock being turned.
“Lindsay, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to shout at you. You didn’t deserve that.”
“Whatever, Ethan. Just go, please. I didn’t come here so you would follow me.”
“I know.” The couch dipped and I felt the warmth of his body. I made an attempt to move away from him, but he grasped my chin, forcing me to look at him. “You’re so young and innocent. I don’t want to corrupt you.”
Snorting, I wrenched my face away from his grip. “How do you know I haven’t been corrupted already?”
His brows rose. “Have you?” I was confused as to why he seemed so upset by the idea.
“No,” I sighed, hating that I had to admit to him that I was a virgin. That could only make me look even more childish in his eyes. “I want you to be my first,” I blurted out. “I know it won’t happen, but that doesn’t stop me from wishing for it.”
“Why would you want someone like me to be your first lover, Lindsay? I think you deserve much better,” he finished with a small laugh.
Perplexed, I glanced at him. “Someone like you? You’re perfect. I’ve had a crush on you for years.” Okay, maybe crush was an understatement, but he didn’t need to know that.
Ethan rubbed a hand over his face. “Wow, my visit home sure has taken an interesting turn,” he murmured. Turning to me, he said, “Lindsay, I’m a player, and I’m not talking about sports. I’m nothing but honest with myself and women. Your first time should be special.”
“It will be more than special if it’s with you,” I whispered. “It’s okay, though. I know I’m not what you usually go for. I get it.” I understood perfectly. I wasn’t his type, and I was young and inexperienced.
He let out a sigh. “No, you don’t get it, Lindsay.” That was all he said before I found myself plastered to his chest, staring up at his gorgeous face. His mouth captured mine in a searing kiss, melting me on the spot. My heart raced with excitement and a tinge of fear. This was it, one of my dreams come true. I gave myself completely to Ethan.
My heart pounds now just at the memory of what Ethan and I shared that afternoon years ago in his pool house. It was the second most beautiful experience of my life, the first being the birth of our daughter, the daughter Ethan doesn’t know exists. If he shows up to for Amanda’s wedding, what’s going to happen?