Chapter 22

Mason

Jared and I waited at the counter of our favorite New York City deli for our food. It had been his idea for Nicole and Callie to meet us in Central Park for lunch—even if the temperature was chilly. Although I wouldn’t have been too surprised if he had come up with the idea as an excuse to cuddle with his wife some more.

“Having a wife and kid has made you go soft,” I told him with a laugh. “Since when do you do picnics?”

“My family used to have them all the time when I was growing up. Still do, especially since Logan loves them.”

My parents used to love them too when I was a kid. Back before I was too cool to hang out with them. Back before my family disowned me.

“Anyway, you’re going to thank me for this,” he said.

“How so?”

“You need to make the most of the time you two aren’t on the bus with the rest of us, and this is the perfect way to do that.”

I chuckled, the sound a little forced, as were my next words. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Except I knew exactly what he meant. I’d been living under the delusion that no one, including Nicole and the band, had figured out that I’d been falling for her since day one, even before I realized it myself.

He leveled his gaze at me, as if the answer to my question was so obvious that only an idiot wouldn’t see it. “It means you’re in love with Nicole.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” My gaze darted around the crowded deli, searching for anyone who might have overheard him. I didn’t need to find myself suddenly engaged on the front page of whatever trash some asswipe paparazzi worked for.

“Right,” Jared said, his voice heavy on the skepticism. “When was the last time you hooked up with a groupie?”

I shrugged. “A few weeks.” More like two and a half months.

“My guess is you haven’t screwed around with anyone since before my wedding, with the exception of Nicole. And it’s not just that. Before she joined us, we always had to be on the lookout for you pranking us. You haven’t done anything since she joined us on tour.”

“That doesn’t mean I’m in love with her. It just means I’m tired from all the touring and haven’t had the chance to fuck a groupie.” And it meant I was too distracted by Nicole to even think about pranking the guys.

He raised his hands, palms out. “All right, you’re not in love with her…so why do you keep looking at her like you are?”

“I don’t…” The words faded away at Jared’s I-don’t-buy-it-and-neither-will-the-guys expression.

“So when are you going to tell her how you feel about her?” he asked, apparently not ready to drop the topic of my love life anytime soon.

“I’m not telling her,” I grunted, “because I’m not boyfriend material.”

A couple of teenage girls stepped into the deli, giggling. One glanced in our direction, and her mouth flopped open as she stared at Jared and me.

“How do you know you’re not boyfriend material?” Jared asked, oblivious to the girls. “It’s not like you’ve ever had a girlfriend.”

“Maybe I don’t want to be a boyfriend. I like being single. It’s simpler.” What was the point of having a girlfriend if you had to worry about her walking away because you were always on the road and were never there for her? My music was all I had left after everything else that had happened in the past. It was the only thing that had never turned its back on me.

Jared didn’t say anything for a moment, and I figured he had dropped the topic. But then he spoke again. “It has nothing to do with whether or not you think you’re good enough to be someone’s boyfriend. This has to do with what happened with your family.”

My gaze slid back to the girls still standing near the entrance. All three were now staring at us, prepared to let out a fangirl scream at any second…or maybe implode from seeing us here. Fortunately, they were too far away to hear our conversation.

“It has nothing to do with that,” I grumbled, already regretting that I’d let Jared talk me into this picnic.

“You’re not a gambling addict anymore, Mason,” he said, dropping his voice so that there was no chance of anyone overhearing him. “You haven’t gambled in years. Maybe it’s time you let go of the past and move on with your future. Tell Nicole how you feel about her.”

I snorted a laugh. “When did you develop a pair of ovaries?”

“When did you become such an idiot? Look, I know what I’m talking about. I screwed things up big-time with Callie, in case you’ve forgotten. Don’t make my mistake, and don’t make the same mistake Nolan made. We both nearly lost the women we love. At least learn from our mistakes.”

“Order for Jared,” the blonde at the counter called out, ending our conversation, for which I was thankful.

He was right, though. What was the point of him and Nolan almost fucking things up with the women they loved if I couldn’t at least learn from their mistakes?

But it wasn’t as easy as that. Nicole had said she couldn’t be with an addict. True, I wasn’t an addict anymore, but did she feel the same way if the person was a former addict?

We grabbed the bags with the food in them, and after chatting briefly with the teenagers (who looked ready to faint at any second) we walked to Central Park. After searching for a few minutes, we found a spot on the grass far enough away so no one would disturb us, yet easy for Nicole and Callie to find. He texted Callie with the exact location. Fortunately, while we waited Jared didn’t bring up the topic of Nicole and me again.

But the moment I saw her, I realized he was right. I’d been too afraid to tell her how I felt because I didn’t wish to go through the pain again of what I’d experienced with my family. Plus I had no idea how she felt about me. After I revealed my feelings for her, she might bolt across the park, screaming, unable to get away from me fast enough.

She dropped onto the grass next to me, a couple of bags in her hand. She was wearing the pair of jeans I liked best on her, cowboy boots, and a warm cream-colored jacket with brown buttons down the front. She had recently bought it because of the cooler fall temperatures she now had to deal with on the road. Between that and the light sweater underneath, it didn’t look like she needed me to warm her up anytime soon.

It didn’t take long before Jared and Callie were busy kissing, and I knew from experience they would be occupied for the next few minutes. Suddenly unable to wait another second, I shifted around and my lips were on Nicole’s, our tongues proving how much we both needed this.

I threaded my fingers in her hair, pulling her head back, which allowed me to deepen the kiss. She leaned into me, as if melting at my touch. She tasted and smelled like I’d remembered—like a piece of heaven. A piece of heaven that I wasn’t sure I could walk away from once this was all over.

I removed my lips from hers and rained small kisses along her jaw to her ear. “Are you gonna show me what’s in the bag?” I murmured. Her breath caught in her throat, and it was one of the sexiest sounds I’d ever heard—along with her laugh.

“It’s nothing,” she whispered.

I licked the shell of her ear. She made that sexy sound again, and my dick twitched with interest. “Since when did anything from a lingerie store amount to nothing?” I asked.

I grabbed for the bag, but she jerked it out of my reach at the last second. What she hadn’t counted on was that I had the upper hand when it came to size and strength. Not to mention that my curiosity had spiked, fueling my determination to discover what she had bought while shopping with Callie.

I lunged again for the bag, which she was holding behind her. Giggling, she tried to scramble away, but I was faster and pinned her down with my body.

“I win,” I said, laughing at her adorable pout, and gave her a quick kiss before grabbing the bag from her outstretched arm.

I climbed off her and peered inside the bag. “Doesn’t look like nothing to me.” From what I could tell, it was the opposite of nothing. I just didn’t want to know who the lucky man was who would get to see her in it. The way things were going between us on tour, it wouldn’t be me. That much I was certain of.

Smirking at her, I handed the bag back to her, then removed the food and drinks from the deli bags, placing everything on the blanket Jared and I had picked up after the interview. He and Callie were still in their own world, cuddling and talking in murmurs.

As I watched them, jealousy struck me in the heart. Not that I was jealous of them—they’d been through so much already that they deserved to be happy.

No, I was jealous of how Jared had put his heart out there, risking it all, to tell Callie how he felt about her. In the end, it had worked out for them, and they were even more in love than they had been back in the spring.

“This all looks amazing,” Nicole said, checking everything out.

I handed her the turkey sandwich I’d ordered for her, figuring that she would love it. Based on the bright smile on her face when she saw it, I’d been right.

Jared gave Callie her sandwich, and we enjoyed ourselves for a while, eating our lunch and catching up on our mornings. The sun shone down on us, as if smiling at our cozy little picnic for four. At one point I slipped my hand under the hem of Nicole’s sweater and stroked my thumb against her lower back, enjoying the feel of her soft skin and wishing it was more than just her back I could touch.

I leaned closer to her, so only she could hear my next words. “I want you in my bed tonight, Nicole.” My voice came out as a husky rumble in my chest, and my breath brushed against her cheek.

She inhaled sharply, the sound a soft gasp. “I want that too, but we shouldn’t—”

“Yes, we should. I can’t take it anymore. I…miss you.”

“I miss you too. Are you sure?”

My thumb paused against her skin. She hadn’t thrown out the that-would-be-unprofessional card, the way I’d half expected. I took it as a positive sign. “I’m sure if you are.”

She gazed up at me, and I could’ve sworn the love I had for her was reflected right back at me. I leaned down and brushed my lips against hers. I wanted to tell her right then how I felt about her, but now wasn’t the best time for that—not unless I wanted Jared and Callie to witness me being rejected if Nicole didn’t feel the same way about me as I felt about her.

“You wanna play soccer?” I asked after we had finished eating. During lunch Nicole had been eyeing the ball we’d brought, the same excited gleam in her eyes as when the band was about to play against the roadies.

Nicole snatched it out of my hand and scrambled up. We split into two teams—boys versus girls. And there was a reason for this. With the two women involved, Jared and I turned it into a physical game, if you get what I mean. There was a lot more touching involved than was normally called for.

Nicole tried to dribble the ball around Jared, but I swooped in, wrapped my arms around her from behind, and swung her out of the way. She laughed, not at all upset that I’d prevented her from scoring on our makeshift goal, constructed out of the coats we’d shed. Not that she was much better. At one point while I was trying to get the ball away from Callie, Nicole came up behind me and murmured in my ear, “I don’t suppose you have handcuffs for tonight?”

That was enough to distract me from the game. I spun around to see if she was serious. She laughed, and did her best to block Jared from using one of his dirty tricks on Callie. Callie went on to score.

We eventually headed back to the hotel to get ready for tonight’s performance. There was a notable change between Nicole and me, a shift in our relationship. What surprised me the most was Jared’s earlier comments. He didn’t care if Nicole and I were involved—not like in the beginning, when the band made it clear that Nicole and I couldn’t fuck each other while she was working for us. But maybe the rules changed when love became part of the equation.

Nicole’s room was further down the hallway from mine. Callie and Jared had already disappeared into theirs. As we approached my door, I took hold of Nicole’s hand, making it clear I wanted her to join me. We still had time before the concert, and I intended to show her how much I loved her—even if I wasn’t ready to tell her with words just yet.

“Let me shower first and get my stuff from my room,” she whispered, leaving me to fist-pump the air in gratitude.