Chapter Fifteen
Less than an hour later, Sky slipped out of the Uber with a shaky thank you after paying and tipping using the app on her phone. She stomped down the tears that threatened. She was not being childish or petty, but she had to let Kane know that she was not going to just go along with everything the way he wanted, especially when it came to her career.
The ring felt weird on her hand. Heavy. But so beautiful. The square-cut diamond caught the light and glimmered. Hope for the future, she thought, although she didn’t feel exactly buoyant with optimism at the moment.
She’d wanted Kane to come to the end of the auction with her. She wanted to thank Jonas for his support and for inclusion of her western collection in his gallery. She wanted to introduce him to Dr. Sheridan, who had been the one who had first noticed her work and invited her to donate to the auction. He had been so interested in The Ride, and she thought he’d be surprised and happy to meet the actual inspiration for the original sculpture. And she was hoping to meet the “off the hook rich” potential client Jonas had enthused over.
And now she was here to do all those things but alone.
Kane had been suspicious and more than a little reluctant to attend the auction. Thinking he was just tired from the ride and all the adrenaline, she patiently waited while Kane speed-showered and signed some autographs, posed for pictures.
“I really want to go, Kane,” she’d said near his ear when he was ready to leave. “I know, Sky, but we just got engaged. Tucker and Laird are going to keep Montana tonight. I thought we could spend the time more…”
“The engagement was for show,” she’d said.
“It meant something to me,” he’d said after a long pause.
She’d sighed. The night had gone from scintillating with promise to feeling thick and dark and tangled. “You’ve done your work. What about mine?” she’d asked quietly.
He’d slipped his arm around her and began to walk. “Is that why you dressed up tonight—the auction?”
“Is that why you proposed tonight—the auction?” she’d countered, feeling a cold dread slither inside her and dig its sharp fingers into her heart.
“No, I proposed because I wanted to do it properly, and publicly. You said I’d kept you hidden away, and I wanted to show you that wouldn’t be the case anymore.”
Sky had stood ballet straight and dug for courage. She had to go into this marriage and be the strong and respected woman she wanted to be, and she couldn’t do that without veering away at the first hurdle. She wanted a partnership. She’d chosen her words carefully. “Kane, it’s important for me to be there.”
“I understand the importance of your work, Sky. And I admire it, and I want to support your career. I will support it, but the auction, the invite, the donation—there’s more at work there than you think.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” He’d suggested that once before, and now Sky truly felt insulted.
“It’s not as black and white as you think. There are undercurrents at work.”
“Because my work doesn’t belong with the work of the other artists?”
“I didn’t mean it like that. Don’t put words in my mouth I’d never say.”
“Kane, congrats.” The owner of Cactus Whiskey Distillery she’d met last night hurried over, slapping Kane on the back. “Great win tonight. Exciting to watch. Know I’ll see you in the finals in Fort Worth.”
“I aim to be there,” Kane said politely, his marketing smile in place. His voice even changed, the cadence slightly more country, easygoing.
“You don’t mind if I steal him for a few minutes, little lady?” The man turned to her, but he already had his hand ready to steer Kane toward a knot of men much further back down the hall. “After all you’re going to be spending a lot of time with him in the future.”
Kane’s eyes shot to hers, gauging her mood. Sky smiled politely, showing the even, white teeth her parents had paid a lot of money for. She too had a social smile.
“Go right ahead,” she said sweet as could be.
“Sky,” Kane had said. “You can wait in the VIP tent or with…” His words were lost because she’d turned around and started walking away. Wait and VIP tent had not been in her future.
So now, Sky walked into the hotel and took the escalator up to the ballroom. She was a featured artist. She belonged here, and she wouldn’t let Kane’s suspicions or her father’s voice from the past squash her back down.
She texted Jonas and felt relieved that he met her at the entrance.
“Perfect timing,” he said. “The Ride is up for bid, and there are a lot of paddles being raised.
“Maybe we should stay out here until it’s over,” Sky suggested. “I can’t watch.”
“Better get used to it, Sky. I think you are going to have a lot of patrons vying for your art in the future.”
“Thank you, Jonas. You believed in me so early.”
“No-brainer.” He snagged two glasses of champagne and handed one to her. “Dr. Sheridan may have brought you to my attention, but I needed no persuasion. To an artistic partnership.”
Sky clinked his glass, and gulped a little.
“Where’s your cowboy?”
“Doing cowboy things.”
Jonas laughed. “I hope that doesn’t mean he intends to steal another piece of art.”
“No, that would be bandits. Cowboys are the good guys.”
“I’m not really in agreement there, but Dr. Sheridan did show me your cowboy’s winning ride tonight on his phone, which scared the crap out of me, and I was blocks away, and even though I still think he’s an arrogant pain in the ass, he’s your problem so let’s forget about him and mingle.”
Kane was not an easy man to forget, and Sky didn’t even try. She hated being here without Kane, but she’d felt like she’d had no choice. She’d needed to make a stand. Hopefully he wouldn’t carry her off again. Hopefully he’d realize how important meeting potential clients was to her.
“I know Dr. Sheridan wanted to meet you. He’d hoped the cowboy would also come.”
“Jonas, the cowboy has a name. It’s Kane, and we got engaged tonight.”
Jonas looked at her ring and then her, his face concerned. “Congratulations,” he paused, clearly thinking something through. “Why didn’t he come with you tonight then?”
She kept her smile in place. “Like I said, busy with cowboy things.”
“Are you okay?”
“Never better,” Sky lied. “Let’s mingle.”
*
Kane didn’t even bother putting his game face on. He’d texted Colt fifteen minutes ago, and yes, Sky was at the auction, and yes, she was with Jonas, and yes, Colt agreed to stay put to keep an eye on her, but no, he had not managed to secure the winning bid for The Ride.
“Why not?” Kane demanded the minute he entered the ballroom and spotted Colt looking like security against the wall. “I told you to bid whatever it takes.”
“I don’t think you meant that much dough.”
“I don’t care how much it went for. I wanted it,” he said knowing he sounded like a sulky teen. He felt like shit. Sky had ditched him at the first opportunity without explanation, and he needed to ice himself. That had been a mother of a ride.
“I wanted you to bid on the sculpture until it was mine.”
He saw his biological father, lording it over the room, his eyes, so cold like a shark’s watching, waiting. Manipulative bastard. Colt had better not have backed down to him.
“Some things you just can’t control,” Colt said philosophically. “Like Sky.”
“That’s for damned sure.”
“Laird said you proposed and she said yes and now…?” Colt didn’t make eye contact, which was probably good, because Kane felt primed for a fight. Not that he would fight, but he really, really wanted to. “Even I don’t fuck up that fast,” Colt said.
“I didn’t want to come tonight,” Kane admitted. He hated saying anything because more explanation would be warranted. He couldn’t get the hell out of Phoenix fast enough. Tonight would be good. Now would be better.
“Why?”
“Million reasons.”
“Tell me one.”
“What did it go for?” Kane asked.
“Two hundred K.”
“No fucking way.”
“Way.”
“Who bought it?”
“Some guy.”
“That narrows it down a lot.”
“He had long black hair.”
Sky was now enthusiastically talking to his biological father, who was smiling. Probably right before he ate her. Kane was about to charge in, but Colt caught him by the shoulder. His very fucking sore shoulder that needed ice. And a lot of tape. And then he needed to stretch for about an hour or three.
“Let her stay,” Colt said.
“WTF!” Kane said. “She doesn’t know who that man really is.”
“Probably because you didn’t tell her.”
That was true. Kane swore.
“I don’t know who he is,” Colt said, and Kane flinched guiltily. “Besides, you know when you pose with all those women, and the pictures go round and round on the internet, and you say you’re working, not fucking?”
“Yeah.”
“Sky’s working. Back the fuck off. I’ll get her home.”
Everything about that idea felt wrong except it was right. He kept pushing. Needing to get her back, needing the emotional intimacy that she’d given him so easily before. Needing to be an instant family with her and Montana. He needed so much. Everything from her. And what was he giving back?
Two other couples joined Jonas, Sky and his biological father. Then Dr. Sheridan’s wife and three daughters rounded out the group. Kane felt sick to his bones. Glad he hadn’t eaten yet. He’d been starved and had wanted to take Sky for a romantic dinner but he wouldn’t be able to get anything past the knot in his gut his bio dad and daughters always created. It took all of his control to not go over there and do something stupid.
It burned him to see them so friendly to his wife. Sky laughed at something his bio dad said, smiled at what were technically his half sisters. She looked beautiful and confident and he didn’t have the right to ruin it for her.
She looked up and met his gaze. Then she smiled. Kane felt gutted. He didn’t deserve her. He never had.
“I’ll take you up on that offer,” he snapped at his brother. “Make sure she gets home. I owe you big.” He spun on his heel and walked back out of the room as if he hadn’t a care in the world, but then he mocked himself. He’d always been about image.
*
Back at the hotel room, Kane set the timer on his watch once again and climbed back into the ice bath. Ice had a way of clearing out the junk in his head as well as alleviating the pain in his body and reducing his inflammation. He’d fucked up with Sky. Again. How could a man who was celebrated at being smooth with women act like such an idiot?
He heard the key in the lock. Closed his eyes. Waited. Nothing. What was she doing? He stayed in the bath five minutes and then deciding he’d prefer to let Sky swing at him sooner rather than later, he got out of the bath, toweled off and put on a pair of boxers.
He wasn’t sure what to expect. Sky in a pair of hip-hugging worn sweats and braless in a razorback tank packing up a suitcase was not it.
He strode to the door and stood in front of it, arms crossed.
“What were you doing in the dark?” she asked looking past him to the dark bedroom and darker still bathroom.
She was leaving him. Really leaving him. He repeated the words internally, tasted them, tried to make them real.
“I know I fucked up,” he admitted.
“No, Kane, you weren’t open.” She folded the last of Montana’s tiny clothes into the suitcase after pulling out one flowery pair of leggings and a plain pink T-shirt and cute little panties that said Monday on them. His heart lurched.
“You told me you wanted us to be open with each other. I told you everything. My every fear. My childhood story. The fact that I never met my biological father. The fact that your biological father tried get a meeting with you through me.”
“Christ, not him again. He ruins everything.”
“No, you ruin it,” Sky informed him stalking to a closet to pull out the larger suitcase he’d bought her. First she put her dresses, including her wedding dress and the dress she’d worn tonight, in the garment bag.
“Why didn’t you tell me Dr. Sheridan was your father?” Sky demanded.
“I hate him.”
“That’s not productive,” she said. “And that’s not really what I asked. Why didn’t you tell me that the man who was in charge of the fundraising campaign for the new hospital wing, the man who approached me about my art, was your father?”
“He was trying to manipulate you,” Kane said.
Sky stood up and came over to him.
“I’m not stupid. And I’m definitely not taking any of your broody man crap. The only way we are going to work is if you open yourself up to me. You demand everything from me—every thought and fear and hurt—and then you just stand there pretending that you’re perfect. Well, I’m not a teenager with a crush anymore. I’m not a nineteen-year-old desperately in love with a man who never once told me he loved me, but showed me in a millions ways even if I was too inexperienced and insecure to understand it then. I am a woman, and I love you. I love you when you ride a bull that sets the arena on fire. I love you when you fall. I love you when your geeky nerd boy emerges, and I love you when you fuck up like tonight. You don’t have to be perfect so get on board with that and stick the ride that’s going to be our life.”
She walked back to packing calmly as if she hadn’t just cracked his heart and his head wide open.
“If you love me, why are you packing?” he asked quietly, more afraid of her answer than of any other moment in his life.
“Because you said you wanted to get an early start to Clovis tomorrow. You bought us so many clothes it’s going to take me some time to….”
The rest of the words were muffled as he picked her up and held her hard against his bare chest.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” he whispered, pressing his lips against her silky hair. “You are the only woman I’ve ever loved and I keep screwing up over and over again. It’s like I’m trapped in a time loop. Are you crying?”
Sky looked up. Her eyes were shiny.
“And there’s my geek, my sweet and my screw-up all lumped together.” She pressed a kiss to his chest. “Seriously, Kane, you’re not really screwing up, you’re just human. You’re not perfect, and I don’t want you to be.”
“Clearly that’s not going to be a problem.”
Sky opened another drawer where there was some lacy lingerie Kane had bought her.
“I don’t think you need to pack up everything tonight,” he said softly, his hand covering hers.
“Nice try, cowboy. Tell me about Doctor Sheridan.”
“I hate that he used you,” he said bitterly. “He ruins everything.”
Sky, her hands full of lacey panties faced him. “Seriously? He brought my work to the attention of an established art gallery owner with connections all over the world. I don’t care why Dr. Sheridan chose my work, just that he did.”
“You’re not pissed that he used you?”
“I just had some Brazilian cowboy tycoon—and I didn’t even know those existed—bid two hundred thousand dollars on my first sculpture. Jonas has six more of my sculptures in his gallery, and already sold two and is negotiating over a third so pretty sure I’m okay with his meddling.”
“You’re so practical,” Kane breathed.
“Clearly you’re not at the moment so give,” she tossed her panties in her suitcase. “Tell me about him. Share. Heal.”
“My mom worked at a barista stand at the hospital one summer because they had a child care facility that was available for all employees so she could put Luke there, and she could work, and study for her general ed classes when it wasn’t busy. She liked the job because it was clean and safe and friendly and she said the doctors tipped good. Not all they did good obviously.”
“Kane,” she whispered her voice broken, and he hated himself just that much more. “Why didn’t you tell me about him? You saw the flyer.”
He laughed but it wasn’t funny. “That flyer gave me my life back so I really ought to be on my knees in gratitude to him even though he’s still a manipulative jerk.”
“Maybe he’s finally ready to make amends,” she said softly. “People change. He’s older now. Maybe he really wants to be part of your life. He seemed so pleasant. He took me aside and asked about you. How you were. What your plans were for the future.”
“Probably so he could hijack them and claim them for himself. He pulled that stunt when I earned a scholarship to Pinnacle Peak Day High School. Same thing when I was offered a scholarship to an Ivy. He said he’d made some calls. He hadn’t done dick. I looked into what the new wing of the Austen Sheridan clinic is focusing on and guess what it is? It’s too easy.”
“Sports medicine.”
“Ding. Ding. Ding. You are correct. Robotic surgeries, physical therapies, rehab from surgery and injuries, physical training, nutrition all geared toward athletes from teens up. Gee, I wonder what he wants with me? Free advertising.”
“Kane, I’m sorry.” She took his hand and pressed it to her cheek. “I was hoping he was trying to make a bridge.”
“If he did, I’d burn it down. So many of my childhood memories involved my mom making me write letters and send pictures to him that he’d return then through his attorney unopened. She’d also make me dress up to try to ambush him somewhere. It was humiliating, but my mom was relentless. She got obsessed. Finally, she got some help through legal aid, and that’s what later spurred her to become an attorney, but even with that good, it was still a nightmare.”
Sky wrapped her arms around him and held him close. He shivered.
“Ice baths. I’d forgotten about those.”
“Alive and well, but hey, the night wasn’t an epic fail. I proposed to the girl of my dreams and she said yes.”
“That sounds promising,” Sky said, looking up at him and fingering his hair.
“And the girl of my dreams happens to be my wife, and I’m crazy head over ass in love with her.”
“She’s pretty intense about you too.”
“And the girl of my dreams gave me a beautiful and brilliant daughter.”
“Speaking of that,” Sky walked to the nightstand, opened up the drawer and took out the box of condoms. “Oops,” she tossed the box in the trash can. “I’m all in with this marriage Kane Wilder, family barn wedding, three or four kids, whatever you want.”
“Really?” He breathed feeling like his heart was on fire. “You’re sure. I don’t want to push you.”
Sky laughed. “Pushing’s what you do best, but don’t worry, I’m learning to push back.”
“You are, and I gotta say, it makes me hot as hell.”
“Don’t we have a proposal and a win and a big sale to celebrate tonight in our hometown?”
“That’s a lot of celebrating,” Kane said. “I remember something earlier about boots.”
“Not sure I remember that,” Sky said. “But you could tell me you loved me again.”
“I loved you four years ago, Sky. I didn’t know what to do with that. I was just blindsided by how fast you fit into my life and how much I wanted you there. I wanted you to stay on the tour with me, but it’s a hard life and a boring one, and you were destined for so much more.”
“I would have stayed,” she said. “But now I am glad that I have my degree, and I have the beginnings of a career.”
“Pretty sure a six-figure sale is more than a beginning.”
“That was for charity, but Jonas does have another buyer interested and who wants to view my sculptures, and with the AEBR commission, I will be busy. Looks like I might need that studio in Montana after all.”
“So Montana?”
“If you’re there, I’m there.”
“I’m thinking two more years tops on the tour, what do you think?”
“What happened to retiring at thirty?”
“You. Montana will be entering kindergarten in two years. We might be expecting another baby or two by then. It would be nice to have a home base. My mom’s wanted me to try to restore the Wilder family ranch: Wild Winds. It’s been eating away at her, the thought of it being sold out of the family, but I think it’s better if we all start fresh. There’s land that borders the small former cattle ranch that Colt inherited coming up for sale. My mom will be pissed but I can talk to my brothers. We can build up a ranch with land north of town, away from the Wilder land and the McTavish land. Clean start if you want.”
“I want.”
“So we’ll travel together until the tour ends this year as long as it works for you and Montana and then after the finals we’ll re-evaluate over the break and spend time with family.”
“That sounds perfect, Kane. You’ve given me a family—your brothers. Their wives.”
“Hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life was walk away from you that day four years ago,” Kane said. “I was afraid that if I didn’t walk away fast and never look back I wouldn’t be able to let you go.”
“And now I’m here to stay.”
He pulled her in tight and held her.
“I love you, Sky Wilder. Crazy deep, but I’d love you in those boots just a teensy bit more.”
AEBR Finals Fort Worth October 2017
“Daddy, I hope you win,” Montana said as he swept her up in his arms before he headed down to the chutes.
He smiled at his little girl, but then he looked at his wife. Thought of how she’d woken him up before dawn—saying that she’d had a really vivid dream with lots of sound and color and that she’d been having those for the past week or so, and just as he’d woken up enough to process that she was telling him that for a reason and that he should pay attention, she’d pulled out a box—a pregnancy test.
He jacked up in bed and she’d laughed at his shock and eagerness.
“You said you wanted to be in on every part,” Sky had teased. “Does that mean you want to watch me pee on the stick too?”
“Hell yeah.” He’d reached for her, feeling excited, scared and a little sick with nerves, but she’d rolled away from him shaking her head.
“You can watch after. You’re pervy enough, and I don’t want you getting any more ideas.”
“I’m always full of ideas,” he’d objected following her to the large master bathroom.
Because of all the events surrounding the finals, they’d been in Fort Worth for the entire week staying in a very upscale hotel. Kane’s family had joined him, even his mother who was still upset that he was giving up on the dream of restoring the Wilder family ranch as it was rumored her father teetered on the edge of bankruptcy.
Kane had managed to purchase three of the five parcels of ranch land he’d been interested in to add to the existing one that Colt had reluctantly inherited from his stepfather. And on the most southern part of the property closest to town where there was a barn that was still in excellent condition—that Kane had suggested Sky use as her studio—they’d been married by local pastor Sam Zabrinsky, who had married Kane and Colt last Christmas and who would marry Laird and Tucker this Christmas. It had been sweet, simple, and very personal as they had written their own vows.
And after the finals they’d live at the ranch during the off-season, make improvements to the property to accommodate all four Wilder brothers, their families and their dreams. They also planned to start the remodel on the existing ranch house that had good bones and vintage charm but needed serious updating.
Mid-January would see him, Sky and Montana back out on the road as the 2018 tour started in a new trailer he was having customized.
Kane had waited at the closed bathroom door, his heart pounding until Sky had opened it, and they had stared at the stick together. Hours later he still felt giddy that the word pregnant had appeared on the white stick so quickly.
“Do you hope you win too, Daddy?” Montana asked, the question launching him back to the present.
“I already did, baby girl. Win or lose this ride, I’ve already won.”
And he had, he thought, as he made his way down to the chutes, lots of people lined up, wishing him luck, high-fiving him, touching his shoulder, wishing him the best. He felt the familiar calm settle over him, like he was in a bubble. He checked his helmet and tucked it under his arm as he made his way to the chute. Ran his gloved hand lightly down his bull rope that he’d re-resined earlier in the day, a ritual that always had centered him, only this time, he’d done it while Sky had sat beside him, taking pictures, leaning against him and talking softly, trying to trick him into telling her about the long overdue honeymoon he had planned.
Gage waited by the chute. They were two-tenths of a point apart going into the final round, but really, almost anyone in the final round could seize victory. Kane had gone into the finals and won it twice already, once from behind and once far, far in the lead. He’d drawn a rank Harper Bull so that should be fun. A Wilder Bull in the final would be better, but he’d get his shot at that dream someday, he predicted. Luke and Tanner and Tucker were determined and working hard despite last year’s setback.
“I know your brother Luke’s up there for you today, but I wanted to say good fortune. I almost want you to win as much as I want to, seeing as we are both burying some ghosts.”
Kane found himself laughing. “If it’s not me, then I hope it’s you.” He shoulder-bumped Gage, whom he’d become closer to since May. “But as for ghosts, I slayed those bastard spirits. Feel like a better man.”
Gage’s face, so often set in fiercely determined lines, relaxed. A small smile touched his lips.
“Think you can beat me?”
“Hell yeah. If not this year, then next.”
“Cocky asshole.”
Kane agreed.
“But best attitude to think you can win.” Gage nodded his approval.
“I not only think I can win, I know I already have,” Kane said thinking about Sky, his little girl and the other baby just entering their lives.
He paused at the bottom of the chute, popped in his mouth guard, fitted on his helmet and snapped it into place. Sky was hoping for a boy this time for him, but Kane was good with another girl. He smiled remembering how Cody had laughed at the news Kane had surprisingly shared with him earlier in the day. Cody hadn’t missed a beat and told him. “No way you’ll throw a boy. You think too goddamn much and are a moody, angsty fuck.”
Then he’d body-slammed Kane and squeezed his shoulder—man code for congrats. “So don’t fuck it up out there and stay out of the well.”
High praise and maybe the beginnings of a friendship from Cody, and Kane realized that he was enjoying himself. It wasn’t just about the technicalities of the ride and the score and gaming the sponsors anymore. It was the challenge and the people and the pageantry as well that drew him.
“You going to ride or just think about it?” Luke peered down at him from the top of the chute, snagging the bull rope from Kane.
Kane vaulted up, heard the announcer with his yearly stats—awesome—and his two previous world championships. The crowd noise was so deafening he couldn’t hear the rest. Somewhere out there in the family section Sky sat with his mother, brothers and their wives and Parker and Montana.
He kept his head down, breathing deep and watching the bull—judging the edgy restless movements of the beautiful beast—definitely pissed and ready to rock and roll. Good, well so was he. The power of the animal was palpable. When everything was set, he let his boot touch the back of the bull to warn it he was coming aboard. The reaction was a strong shift to the side. The flex of muscle was truly awesome.
He thought he should take a photo up here next time for Sky. She could capture that flex of muscle—make it look alive. Maybe somehow capture the coiled tension of the bull rider and the bull right before they melded into one.
For eight seconds.
A murmur went through the men at the top. Approval and caution.
Kane dropped down and immediately set his feet angled back so they couldn’t catch on the bars and wrapped his rope. He pulled and wrapped and pulled tighter again and again. He tested the grip. The smell of bull, dust, popcorn and resin filled his nose and the feel of the bull’s energy translated to his body.
One more adjustment of the grip and he rocked up higher on the bull. Set his thighs, his ass, flexed to give himself space to move with the bull. His left hand was already up. He shifted his pelvis forward, tested the distribution of his weight. Felt good. He felt set as if a pole went through the top of his head, his body and pelvis welding him in place. He shifted up, back, side to side and felt the quiver of the muscles beneath him. He ran through the visuals of the bull’s last five rides, pictured himself on top, thighs tight, ass floating slightly above to better counter shift.
Yeah.
Kane nodded.
Slide of metal. Powerful enough thrust to launch the bad boy rank bull clear of the gate to start the clock.
The End