Jonathan
I watched the home nurse adjust the pillows behind my mother’s back and then leave.
She took her glasses off and placed them onto her lap.
“I’ve had to follow the news to keep up-to-date with you, Jonathan,” she sighed. “The least you could have done was answer my calls.”
“Sorry. It’s complicated.”
“How complicated?”
I turned to look out the window, wishing that I had good news to bring to the visit. The whole plan had been based on making my mother happy and letting her attend at least one of her children’s weddings before it was too late, but now it had evolved into something deeper. Much deeper than I knew how to handle. It would have been easier for me to just cut Kate loose and walk away, find someone else and start over, but I couldn’t.
“Jonathan?” my mother pressed, raising an eyebrow. “Have you and Kate…?”
I shook my head.
“No, we’re still together,” I lied. “We just…”
She pointed to the pile of papers on her side table.
“Then why am I seeing you fighting with your best friend and out with other women?”
I ran my fingers through my hair. She was right—of course she was. I’d been untouchable for far too long. I’d been the one to hurt and not get hurt, but now when the shoe was on the other foot, I couldn’t protect the feelings that I was developing from getting trampled on.
“When I found out this disease was going to take me, Jonathan, I never thought I’d get to see you happy. I saw a glimmer of it recently but now…”
“I’m happy,” I interrupted. “I promise. It’s just complicated. I have a few things to sort out first.”
She watched me intently, and I knew she wasn’t convinced.
“If you love this woman then you shouldn’t ever let her go.”
“Unfortunately, she’s one of those rare beauties that aren’t fazed by my wealth or status. I don’t know. I think I hurt her beyond repair.”
“Then you’ll have to fix it. Show her that you were wrong. Make it up to her.”
“I don’t know how. I’m not that guy, remember? I never have been.”
“Then start! When we were younger, I saw your father dancing with another girl at the dance and I wouldn’t speak to him for two weeks.”
“You never mentioned this. What did he do?”
“He came and stood outside my front porch every day until I forgave him. Every night he’d serenade me with little songs he’d made up, and he’s not even a singer. God rest his soul, he sung until he had me again. The point is, Jonathan, you have to go deep. Get out of your comfort zone and channel that inner romantic we brought you up to be.”
I stood up, the penny dropping instantly. I knew what I was going to do, and I’d never felt so sure of something in my life.
I went over and kissed her cheek.
“I’ll see you again shortly, but there’s something I have to do first.”
“You run along now and remember, if she’s worth fighting for then that’s exactly what you have to do.”
I went towards the door to leave, but stopped and looked back at her.
“Thanks again,” I whispered. For the first time since we’d starting talking I realized just how frail and slim she looked with dark rings under her eyes, and I felt a stab of fear in the pit of my stomach.
I was so used to having her around that the reality hit—one day she wasn’t going to be there. The fountain of knowledge and rational thinking would be gone, and if I didn’t have Kate and Jessica, I’d be alone.
Anna stood at the desk in front of me, nodding as I explained the status of mine and Kate’s relationship. I saw the look on her face when I told her the reason why we were no longer getting married.
“I have to tell her the truth,” I said, getting up from my chair and walking to the window. “I have to let her know what was going on that night, and that’s why I brought you here. I can’t keep your secret anymore.”
She sighed and shook her head.
“I wish you’d told me sooner.” She walked over to me and placed a hand on my arm. “You do what you need to do, however you need to do it. I’m not here to cause trouble in your relationship. I just wanted to wait for the documents to come back before you told her…”
“I think I’ve lost her.”
She shook her head again and walked back over to where her purse was on the desk and pulled out a piece of paper.
“Don’t worry. You do what you need to do. I understand.” She handed it to me and pulled me down towards her. “You tell her I’m sorry, okay? Then come and find me.”
I nodded as she pulled away and walked towards the door.
“Thank you, Anna,” I said just before she left my office. “I appreciate everything…”
She smiled and nodded before leaving, and I took a deep breath looking at the paper in my hands. I just hoped that telling her would make her understand that she was the only one I wanted right now. The only one that had ever meant something to me.
I pressed the intercom and Helen’s voice sounded throughout the room.
“I need you to arrange the jet for tomorrow afternoon,” I said, confident I was making the right decision.
“Tomorrow?” she questioned.
“Correct. Tomorrow, and I need James ready to take me to Kate’s place.”
“Is that wise, Jonathan? You have a full schedule tomorrow, not to mention the meeting with…”
“Clear the whole day.”
“But…”
“Clear it all and confirm with me once the arrangements are in place.”
“Of course.” She paused for a moment before speaking again. “Where shall I say you’re going?”
“Paris, Helen. I’m going to take Kate to Paris…”