Chapter 27

Quinn

“No, no, to the left a little more.”

“Right?”

“Right.” I nodded and then held up my hands, waving them in the air, “No! To the left!”

“Left? But you said right.”

“I said left.”

“And then you said right.” Luke Brewer growled, him and his brother’s all glaring at me under the weight of the large, and extremely heavy, framed painting that I’d snagged from the local antique shop for a few dollars.

“I meant right, as in it was in the right spot,” It was my turn to growl as I pointed some more, “Now, move it back to the left.”

“Here?”

“Yes, right…about…there. Right. I mean correct! Damn it.” I closed my eyes for a moment, “Just hang it there, okay?”

“Whatever you say,” Danny huffed, “You’re the boss.”

I had to resist the urge to kick the ladder out from under all three of them but I restrained myself, instead resting my head in the palm of my hand as they hung the artwork.

"Rough day?" Lily asked, appearing at my side like a waif out nowhere. It was a special talent she had, sneaking up on people. I jumped and then sent her a glare but there was no real anger behind it.

“More like a rough month.”

“Tea?” Lily asked, holding out one of the small, porcelain cups she always seemed to have on her. “It’s good for the baby.”

I glanced at the liquid dubiously, “You swear it’s just tea, right?”

“Green tea with a splash of honey. That’s all. I promise.”

After a moment I took it, inhaling the scent before taking a tentative taste. I could never be sure with Lily and her concoctions. I swore I could still taste that ‘love’ potion. And it didn’t even work. Leo still left. The thought brought an aching wave along with it that rolled through me, slow and thorough.

It had been a month since the last time I’d seen him and still, it was like a wound that wouldn’t heal. It was still raw and open and tender. I’d thrown myself into work at the property, hoping it would help but thoughts of him still sprang on me at unsuspecting moments. Like now.

“Everything is really coming together, Quinn,” Lily was saying and I had to fight to focus on her words, and not the gaping hole inside me that threatened to swallow me. “You should be proud of yourself.”

"Proud of us, you mean," Charlotte, clad in her traditional black on black ensemble wiped the sweat off her forehead as she dropped the heavy toolbox on the floor by the other myriad of tools. "We've been doing all the work."

I shot her a sharp stare but Lily jumped in, diffusing the situation with a sweet smile.

“We’ve all been working hard. None of this would have even happened without Quinn’s vision.”

“Yeah, and my blisters.” Charlotte said with a roll of her eyes, but then she relented, “Lily’s right though. It really is looking good. Not at all like the dilapidated death trap it started out as.”

“Thanks, Charlotte.” I snorted on a bark of laughter.

"You know, I think all of our hard work deserves a little bit of a reward, don't you?" One of the Brewer brothers said as they walked over to join us. The only one missing from our little ragtag group was Finn. He had been mysteriously absent ever since a hushed but heated conversation between him and Lily a few weeks ago. He'd stomped out of the house and I hadn't seen him since.

I looked around at these people who had all worked their asses off to help me and I felt tears suddenly threaten behind my eyelids. Damn pregnancy hormones, I thought to myself, trying to fight back the wave of moisture. I’m not going to cry. I’m not. Not now. Not here. Not in front of everybody. Especially Charlotte.

That last thought helped to pull me back from the edge.

"I think we definitely deserve a reward." Danny was saying, wiping his hands off on his already dust and paint-stained jeans "Who wants a drink? Lucky's?"

I flinched at the sound of the bar that I hadn’t stepped into since that terrible day in Leo’s emptied out apartment.

“I don’t know…” I tried to protest but was quickly overturned as the rest of the group voiced their excitement.

“Oh, come on. You can’t just work all the time.”

“Yeah, you have to have fun too. All work and no play makes Quinn a dull girl.”

I rolled my eyes at the onslaught, “What’s the point? It’s not like I can drink. Obviously.” I nodded to my stomach that was beginning to show, a tiny bump visible under my shirt.

Lily threw an arm around me, leading me towards the door despite my protests, "Come with us, Quinn. You're our fearless leader. We wouldn't dream of going out without you."

“Speak for yourself,” Charlotte snorted, earning a hard stare from me but finally I gave in with an irritated sigh.

“You’re not going to stop until I agree, are you?”

“Nope.” Lily shot me a shameless grin, still shooing me outside and pointing towards her awful yellow car, “I’ll even drive.”

"Uh, thanks but I'll drive myself," I said hastily. The less time spent in that eyesore, the better.

“You promise? You’ll meet us at Lucky’s?” She demanded, before letting me go. I held my hand over my heart.

"I promise," I added a snarky grin at the end that had her shaking her head but finally, Lily and the rest of the crew were piling into her bug and I gratefully got into my own, normal colored car.

I started the engine, pulling out of the long driveway, refusing to think about where I was going until I parked in the lot to the side of the building. I hated that my hands were shaking as I turned the key, silencing the car. I sat there, frozen to the seat, staring at the worn, red brick of the building and fighting the panic that welled inside of me.

"I can do this. Of course, I can do this." I said, giving myself a pep talk, hoping it would get my limbs working again, "Stop being ridiculous. It's just a bar." It’s his bar.

Not anymore. But that reminder didn’t make me feel any better. If anything, the thought twisted the pain in my stomach a little tighter.

A sharp knock on the window had me gasping, and turning with a jump in the driver’s side seat.

“Are you going to just sit there all night talking to yourself, or are you coming in?” Lily asked, her nose pressed against the glass and I shot her a half-serious glare.

“Jesus, you scared the shit out of me.”

“Sorry,” she said, but ended it with a grin, “But not that sorry. Come on, Quinn. It’s time to go in.” Her grin was infectious and soon there was one of my own curling up the corner of my lips.

“Fine,” I huffed, drawing out the word as I pushed open the door, “Can’t wait to have a gin and tonic, without the gin. Sounds super fun.”

“Don’t worry, I brought some tea for you too.”

“Oh thank goodness. I was worried, I really was.” I said, my tone snarky but Lily paid me no mind as she pulled me inside. The rest of the group was already there, crowded around a table with extra chairs pulled up and I reluctantly sat down.

As Charlotte and Lily and the boys chatted around me, I could admit to myself that it was easier to relax than I would have imagined. I didn’t really join in the conversation, but it was enough, to listen to them joke and mess with each other. The easy friendship and camaraderie something that I hadn’t had much of in the past years. Despite my initial misgivings, I even found myself having fun.

Until I looked behind me.

My eyes landed on an empty bar stool at the bar and like it had been yesterday I could see it unfolding behind my eyes. Leo, running into me outside on the sidewalk, then inviting me in for a drink. We had sat at those stools, drinking in each other as much as the alcohol and he had intoxicated me ever since.

I didn't even realize I was moving until I was halfway to the bar. My heart was heavy as I sat in the same stool I'd sat in all those months ago. I had been such a different person then, but I was changed now. I'd had my heart broken, for one. My hands rested on the swell of my belly. And I had another life to think of now. A life that I already loved more than anything in the world.

"I know it's hard for you to be here," Lily said, suddenly taking the seat next to me. "I know it must remind you of Leo. But he left. Maybe it's time to move on?"

I turned to her with tears blurring my vision. There was nothing I could do to stop them, just as there was nothing to stop the torrent of words, “How can I move on, Lily? I still love him. I think I fell in love with him that first day and it just took me losing him to realize and now I’m having his baby and I don’t even know where he is! I can’t even get a hold of him to tell him what happened.”

I was shaking as I turned away again, trying to bite back the tears and the words, but I couldn’t contain either, “What the hell am I supposed to do now?”

“You’re a fighter, Quinn. And a survivor.”

“What if I’m tired of fighting? Of just surviving? What if I finally want to live?”

Lily gave me a long sad look before shaking her head, “Quinn, you deserve to be happy. You’re going to make this business a success and be a wonderful mom to that little baby. You are all you need to be happy. You can make it happen. And you have all of us too,” Lily gestured to the table where everyone was talking and laughing, unaware of my heart shattering into a million pieces on the floor of the dingy bar. “And Jonah.”

“Right, Jonah,” I snorted. We hadn’t talked much since he’d found out about my pregnancy, both of us working long hours and when we did he’d always look away, guilty or ashamed of me, I couldn’t quite tell. But either way, it was too painful to bear much of.

"Believe me, Quinn. It's better to just forget about Leo. He broke your heart. He's not worth your happiness." Lily nodded once firmly before sliding off the stool and back to the table with the others. I stayed where I was, for a single moment feeling at least a little closer to him. It was probably all I'd ever get.

"Hey, honey, were Y'all talking about Leo? Leo Delaney?" Stella's gruff voice broke into my thoughts as she walked over, speaking low as if she had a secret to tell. Curious, I nodded, turning in the stool and propping my elbows on the top of the bar.

“Yeah? Why?”

“I probably shouldn’t even be saying anything, but…”

“But what, Stella? If you know how to get a hold of him–.”

“No, not that. But…Well, that morning you came here, tearing the place apart looking for him, I wasn’t completely honest. I thought it was for the best, but now I’m not so sure,” The bartender gave me a guilt-ridden look.

“What is it, Stella? Just tell me if you know something.” I leaned forward, taking a deep breath before letting the words out in a rush, “I’m pregnant. Leo is the baby’s father. He deserves to know.”

Stella nodded her head, leaning even closer over the bar, “Well, the night before Leo was sitting right there, getting pretty drunk. Your brother came storming in here mad as a bull with a fly in his ear and gave Leo a pretty good beating. I knew it was about you. There’s nothing else that gets Jonah Moore riled up like someone messing with his little sister.”

My eyes narrowed and rage ignited inside me as she continued to tell her story.

"Leo just took the hits. He didn't even fight back. Just stood there. Then I overheard your brother tell Leo to leave. He refused at first, but the Jonah said something about selling a property or some such and Leo went white as a sheet. He mumbled something about leaving, told me he was quitting, and moving out of the upstairs apartment, and he was gone that very night.

Stella gave me a sad shake of her head as I sat there in stunned silence. Had Jonah threatened to sell the bed and breakfast just to make Leo leave? Even knowing how much I cared about it, knowing how much I cared about him?

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you right away,” Stella said, looking away guiltily, “I thought it was for the best. A clean break and all that. I really don’t know how to reach him, but I figure your brother might.”

My pulse pounded loud and insistent in my ears until all I could hear was the white noise drowning out the cacophony of the bar. I rose to my feet like a zombie, moving on instinct but my mind was a haze of chaos and betrayal and most of all, a red-hot rage that fueled me forward.

I didn’t say another word to Stella, I didn’t stop to say goodbye to Lily or the others, I just kept moving one foot in front of the other until I was outside. I got into my car and started it by rote, my mind still buzzing like a hive of angry bees as I drove out of the parking lot. There was only one thought that I could grab hold of and focus on. I needed to find Jonah. Now.