Chapter Thirty

KEE’S MOUTH fell open. He stared at me for a time and then said, “You’re leaving us?”

It was heartening to hear the despair in his voice. No matter what I thought about being Wallpaper Shane, the guys did care about me.

“Just for a bit. A couple of years maybe and only during the footy season. I’ll be back over Christmas.”

“But… but you’re the one who always checks up on us and is there with encouragement and… no. You can’t leave us.”

That shocked me. But what shocked me even more was Ambrose agreeing with Kee.

“He does, doesn’t he? After every game he’s on the text messages to me, telling me all the wonderful stuff I did during the game, even though I’d been focusing on the bad stuff.”

Kee nodded in agreement. “And he sends you messages to make sure you got home.”

Ambrose laughed. “Yeah, and sometimes you have to lie and say you did, even though you’re still out.”

“Or he’ll come and pick you up when your boyfriend assaults you in the middle of the night.”

“Or he’ll come and pick you up from the airport, even though you don’t deserve it.”

“And he remembers your birthday.”

“And checks up on you when you’ve had the flu.”

“And asks about her when you said your mum was sick.”

Ambrose threw back his head. “Or messages your mum directly.”

Kee’s mouth dropped. “Oh my God. Is that what happened?” He turned in his seat and called across to Tate. “Tate. Did you give your mother’s mobile number to Shane?”

Tate looked up from his cooking. “No. Why?”

“Remember how we got that call from your mother to check on your chest infection, and we couldn’t work out how she knew when she was in the middle of the Sahara?”

I turned bright red and dropped my face into my hands. Oh, no. They weren’t going to bring that up, were they?

Tate’s face took on an expression of wonder. “I remember. I’d been coughing for days, and neither of us had gotten any sleep. So the doctor finally gave me that medicine that knocked me out, and you and I slept for, like, sixteen hours without waking? And when we finally roused, there were ten messages from Shane, some from the other guys, and Mum was calling?”

“Yep,” Kee crowed. “Shane told her.”

Tate looked astonished. “How? Mum and Dad were in the middle of a study and had no communication. Mum had to borrow a satellite phone from some army guy.”

I squeezed my eyes shut and hoped I wouldn’t have to answer. In the silence I peeked from between my fingers. Tate, Kee, Hiram, and Ambrose were all looking at me. I sighed, dropped my hands, and gave them the information they wanted.

“Fine. I emailed her university email address. Okay? You guys weren’t answering your phones, and I was getting worried, so I looked up your mother at the university you told me your parents worked at and sent her a quick message to ask her if you were all right. I didn’t realize she was in the Sahara. Apparently she had no phone, but she had a computer, and she logged in to check her emails from work.”

Hiram stared at me. “And the time my brother contacted me out of the blue when I was having trouble?”

I pressed my fingers to my brow bone. My secrets were coming out. “Facebook.”

“How did you even know his name?” Hiram asked.

I shrugged. “You mentioned it once, back when we were dating.”

“Once, maybe.”

Vinnie wandered over. It was halftime, and he was looking for another drink. “What are we talking about?”

“About all the times Shane helps us out and checks up on us,” Kee answered.

Vinnie dropped down into the chair beside me. “Shane’s a great secret keeper. He was the first to know about me and Aaron, but only because he guessed. And he never told. He was supportive of me.”

“He was there for me when Matt the Rat hit me,” Kee said. He no longer feared that jerk. We’d all rallied around him when he needed time. And yeah, we steered a number of people away from dating Matt. It wasn’t just me.

“He tutored me in maths through high school because he didn’t want me to fail,” Ambrose said as though he were reminiscing about good times. I couldn’t believe Ambrose would think those sessions in torture were good times.

“He stayed my friend even after we broke up,” Hiram put in. “I never felt awkward remaining friends with him.”

I didn’t know what to say.

“I’m going to miss you, Shane,” Kee said.

Vinnie’s head swung around in Kee’s direction. “What? Miss him? Are you going somewhere?”

Kee tipped his chin in my direction. “No. Shane is. Shane’s going to Melbourne to live.”

Tate, Hiram, and Vinnie answered immediately.

“What?”

“No.”

“Really?”

“Oh my gawd!”

I turned when I realized Jamie was behind me and had heard Kee’s announcement.

“You’re going to Melbourne? Why?” Jamie looked dismayed.

I was going to miss Jamie the most. “Because I’m going to live with Ambrose while he finishes his career with the Hawks. Then I’ll be back. Because you guys are my friends, and I’ll miss you too much to keep away forever.”

Jamie rushed forward and engulfed me in a hug. “You’re going to live with Ambrose? Well, that’s okay, then. I can give you up for that. I couldn’t give you up for anything else.”

I stood and hugged Jamie. He was my best friend, the one who had always been around, just like Ambrose had. And yet I’d fallen head over heels for Ambrose and stayed in love with him for over twelve years, and I’d never felt that way about Jamie.

Then Kee put both of his arms around us and hugged us both. I felt more arms and bodies join in—Vinnie, Hiram, Tate, Aaron, Liam.

I felt the tears prick. “I’ll only be in Melbourne, guys. I’ll expect regular updates, lots of photos, and don’t you dare drop me off the group chat like you did this morning.” My voice was muffled by the many bodies crowded around.

“Sorry, Shane.” Jamie sounded contrite.

“We won’t do it again.” That was Kee.

“We’ll miss you.” That was Tate.

“Wait. What?” Aaron’s voice was shocked. “Shane’s leaving? I thought we were doing the group hug because it’s something gay guys do.”

That broke us up, and we dispersed as Jamie explained the situation to the latecomers who’d been outside. “Shane’s moving to Melbourne to be with Ambrose.”

Aaron looked shocked. “Like… be with Ambrose?”

Obviously some of them hadn’t quite caught on.

“Yes,” Jamie said firmly.

“Du-ude,” Liam said astonishment.

Aaron turned shocked eyes to Ambrose, and I wondered if it had somehow lessened Ambrose in Aaron’s eyes to know he liked guys. But then Aaron turned his eyes to me. “Holy cow.”

“What?” I asked. Aaron wasn’t shocked at Ambrose at all. It was me. What had I done?

“Do you mean to tell me, you’ve been getting jiggy with Bro-Jak all this time, and you haven’t once said anything?”

The boys all had a bit of a laugh at Aaron’s turn of phrase.

“Oh my gawd,” Jamie suddenly shouted. “Handy Andy. You told me you had a crush on A. It wasn’t Handy Andy at all. It was Bro-Jak.”

Tate stopped him. “Uh. Bro-Jak doesn’t start with A. It’s BJ.”

Aaron fisted the air. “It was BJ TJ after all.”

“I told you guys Shane was getting regular sex. You didn’t believe me,” Hiram said.

“We didn’t not believe you, Hiram,” Kee laughed. “We simply never imagined it was someone like Bro-Jak. Way to go, Shane.”

“Way to go, Ambrose, I reckon,” Vinnie said loyally. “Ambrose is getting the better deal.”

Aaron stood with his hands on his hips. “Aw, man. I can’t believe my friend has been bumping uglies with Bro-Jak and never told us. I could’ve been telling the guys at work.”

“Well, technically you still can’t tell anyone.” Dan joined the conversation.

“What?” Vinnie said with a frown. “Why not?”

“Shane is Ambrose’s oldest friend, and he’s going to live in Melbourne with him while he goes to university. Any relationship beyond that, Ambrose and Shane are neither confirming nor denying.”

I looked at my friends. Some seemed sad at that news and some confused. A couple were angry and voiced that. Tate glared. “You’re not forcing Shane back in the closet, are you? Because I can’t agree with that.”

Dan was steady with the accusation. “No one is forcing anything. Shane’s gay. No one is denying that. And Ambrose’s sexual orientation has nothing to do with how well he plays football. That’s all we’re saying.”

Liam shook his head. “It won’t stay hidden.”

Ricky spoke for the first time. “Look what happened to Declan Tyler. Look at the shit Micah Johnson is going through. Do you guys really want that to happen to Ambrose?”

Tate looked worried. “If a media storm like that erupts around Shane, it’s not going to be pretty.”

I looked at Ambrose with sympathy. So far he’d been sitting in silence and listening to everyone discuss him. I was used to it, but he wasn’t. He obviously took some sort of courage from me and spoke up for the first time.

“Look, if it happens, it happens. I’m not hiding. It’s just it’s never been a part of what Shane and I were about. I simply want to get through this injury and return to playing. And I want Shane by my side as I do that. I don’t think it’s anyone’s decision apart from me and Shane as to what we tell the media. I’m paid to play football to the best of my ability. It’s not fair on any player to have some stranger poke their nose into their lives and comment on stuff outside football. It would be different if I were making money other ways. If I were modeling, then you’d have the right to comment on my fitness and body shape. If I were selling my services as an interior decorator, then by all means, comment on my style and my home. But Shane and I will handle it the way we think best. I really don’t think either of us will be up to intense scrutiny. So, we’re just going to lay low. And I’d appreciate it if you helped us do that. Because no one should be forcing anyone in or out of the closet.”

My friends looked at each other. Clearly none of them wanted to be the first to speak. Finally Vinnie said, “I agree. It’s none of my business.”

“I don’t think anyone should go around labeling people,” Liam said. “I’m one of those weird people who has a label no one really wants to listen to me define. So if you want to label yourself as Shane’s childhood friend, then I’m in no position to argue.”

Tate shrugged. “As long as Shane is agreeable to it, I’m not going to rock the boat.”

Kee echoed Tate’s shrug. “And it’s not going to be forever, right?”

Hiram nodded. “I support Shane. If it’s what Shane wants to do, then I’ll do it.”

Ricky held up his hands. “Hey, like Liam said, I’m in no position to argue. My family were vilified for years for something society didn’t understand. I was born a secret keeper.”

Jamie smiled. “I’d do anything for love. If the alternative is you guys are apart, then I’m all for doing it your way.”

There was only one person left in the room who hadn’t agreed. Six-foot-four Aaron. He looked dismayed and stared directly at me as he said, “You mean I don’t get to tell the guys at work that my friend Shane is playing hide the salami with Bro-Jak?”

A collective groan echoed around the room.

“Du-ude.”

“Did he just say—?”

“Oh my gawd.”

“I say we all piss on his grass.”

“I’m going to have to say nine Hail Marys for the sin of loving that man.”

“If we all piss in the same spot on his grass, I’m sure it will kill it. Let’s pick a patch right in the middle.”

Aaron looked around in confusion. “What did I say?”