Everything’s been wrong with my life ever since Laura walked out of our hotel room two weeks ago. I’ve tried to call her dozens of times, but I only get voicemail.

Meanwhile, I’ve been ignoring all of Alice’s calls.

I’m back in Michigan, and I need to make some decisions. I’ve been staying in a hotel a few blocks away from my apartment while avoiding Alice. Why is she living in my place, anyway? It’s time to figure out my next move. How can we separate our finances and go our separate ways?

I call her, and we agree to meet for lunch in a café on the same block as our apartment. It’s a quiet but upscale joint that serves Instagram-worthy brunches and elaborate mocktails. When I arrive, Alice is already sitting at a table outside, in front of the café, nursing an elderflower cordial.

She stands to greet me. She’s wearing a sheer white floating dress with an opaque white slip underneath, and a pair of flat white-leather sandals on her feet. Large, colorful tassel earrings hang from her earlobes. Her hair is brushed to full volume, floating around her shoulders and gleaming in the sun. She’s finished the look with a pair of large, designer sunglasses.

“Adam, I can’t believe you’re finally home.”

She reaches out to hug me, but I stand stiffly in response. She smells like Coco Chanel.

Alice releases me, and I join her at the table. I order an espresso, but don’t feel like eating anything. Alice orders a chicken, bacon and avocado salad. Minutes later, we’re both sitting with our orders in front of us.

I’m ready to have a serious conversation, but she doesn’t look like she’s prepared for any kind of hard talk. She’s looking across at me dreamily with her chin resting on clasped hands. I think I can see stars dancing in her eyes. She acts like we’re on a regular date on a sunny Sunday morning.

All I can see is a woman who fucked another man in our bed. It’s easy for her to conveniently forget about the betrayal.

“We need to discuss where we go from here,” I say.

Alice sits up straighter and nods. The smile falls from her face, and she meets my eye. “I think we should start over,” she tells me. “Move back in, and we’ll take it slow. I’ll prove that you can trust me again.”

I look away. “I don’t think it’s going to work.”

“It was a mistake.” Alice leans across the table and grasps at my hand. “We’ll go to counseling, baby. I did it because I was lonely.”

“I’m still going to be traveling. What’s going to happen next time you’re lonely?”

She pushes an avocado around her plate in silence. Alice lifts her eyes to meet mine and raises her eyebrows. “We haven’t even talked things through yet.”

“I don’t know what to tell you. I’m not sure I can get over this.” I look across at her and frown. “Even before you cheated, we had our issues. For two or three years, we’ve been drifting apart. I think we’re different people than we were twelve years ago. We don’t want the same things anymore.”

“Has this got anything to do with the woman you were giving a ride to?” The tone of her voice implies she doesn’t believe Laura and I were simply traveling together.

I meet Alice’s icy glare and reply frankly. “Yes.”

Alice’s eyes fill with tears, and she bows her head. She swallows a few times to hold back the tears as her fingers tighten around her cutlery.

I continue. “I haven’t told you the whole story. Laura and I slept together. On our last night in Vegas, we went to a chapel, and we got married. She’s my wife.”

“So, you’re with her now?”

“Well, she is my legal wife.”

Alice lifts her face and stares at me fiercely. She wipes away her tears with stony determination and sets her jaw against any more crying. She folds her arms across her chest.

“I don’t care about what happened in Vegas. We both made mistakes.”

“I love her.”

Across the table, Alice squeezes her eyes shut like my words are causing her physical pain. “Don’t say something you don’t mean. I’ve not been giving you what you need,” she says. “I’ve been too focused on my work, and I’ve taken you for granted. I don’t blame you for what happened. Like you say, we’ve had issues. The difference is, I’m willing to work to get past our problems” She pauses, biting down on her lip. She lifts her gaze to mine in earnest. “I’ve stopped taking my pill. I’m ready to commit. I want a family with you.”

“Alice, it’s too late for that.”

She grabs my hand. “Don’t get cold feet on me now. This is what you’ve always wanted.”

“Having a child won’t fix anything. It’s not the time to get pregnant. We shouldn’t bring a kid into our chaos.”

“Well, maybe not right away, then, but in time. The point is, I’m thinking about our future. That means more to me than anything. Divorce that woman. I’ll step back from my work. We’ll go to counseling, and, five or six months down the line, maybe we’ll be ready to start trying for a baby.”

I turn away from her. I’m still hurt by what she’s done. The sense of betrayal and distrust hasn’t left me, even after months on the road. What’s more, I haven’t stopped thinking about Laura for a moment. I’m in love with someone other than the woman sitting in front of me.

“I don’t think that’s going to happen.”

“Do you think it’s happening with this other woman?” Alice challenges. She leans forward and looks up into my eyes. “We’ve got a chance to have a real family. We can have a happy future together. We’ve put in so much groundwork, and we’re so close to a happy ending. Don’t throw it all away for a tramp. I’m sure it felt exciting and special, but that’s only because we’ve been taking each other for granted for so long. We’ll get our spark back.”

“Is that why you fucked him?” I retort. “It was exciting and special?”

Alice’s gaze doesn’t falter. “Yes. It was. It felt good to have someone’s undivided attention for a change. You’re always away. I felt like you didn’t see me anymore. But we have history,” she says firmly. “And I believe we have a future. We’ll turn out just fine if we’re willing to work at it. We have so much to look forward to, I think it’s worth going the extra mile. We just hit a speed bump, baby.”

Even if my feelings for Laura are as real as I believe them to be, they don’t matter if she doesn’t feel the same. But I can’t stay with Alice, either. I let out a long, low breath, and run a hand through my hair. “It’s a lot to think about.”

“I know, but we can take it one step at a time.”

“What do you think step one is?”

“Come home.”

I drum my fingers on the surface of the table. There are a million and one thoughts chasing each other around inside my head, but eventually, I make my decision. I nod. “All right.”

Maybe it will buy me some time to get her out of my life.

Alice gasps and her hands fly up to her mouth, which stretches into a wide, joyful smile. “Do you mean it? You’ll move back in?”

“I’m only promising I’ll come back right now.”

She glances up the street to our apartment at the end of the road. “Let’s have a glass of wine back home. I bet you’ve missed the place.”

We pay our bill and go to the apartment building. It has a reception area in the lobby with a security guard who welcomes us as we enter. We take the elevator to the top floor and then walk the few steps to the door to my apartment.

It feels good to slide my key into the lock of my home. The endless cycle of hotels can get wearing over time.

Nothing’s changed. It’s still sleek and minimalist, furnished with black leather sofas, a glass coffee table, a standing globe that conceals my whiskey collection, and a huge sixty-inch TV mounted between two enormous windows overlooking the street outside. The only difference is in the aroma. The whole place smells feminine, reminding me of Alice’s perfume and cosmetics.

It makes me want to throw up.

Alice steps through the doorway ahead of me and beams, throwing her arms out to gesture around the apartment. “Home sweet home!”

I spot the engagement ring still gleaming on her finger as she throws out her hands. It makes my stomach twist. I feel like I’m stepping back into a life I don’t want, but the person who would really make me happy is in another state and refusing to talk to me.

Alice skips into the apartment and falls happily onto a sofa. She kicks off her sandals and points out her toes, patting the seat next to her invitingly.

“Come sit with me. We haven’t spent any time together. I want to get to know you all over again. What you need, what makes you happy, what you want from life.”

I sit with her, and we talk. She asks me about my trip, about my sales, and about the places I stayed. We’re both careful to talk around Laura’s presence on my latest adventure. Equally, I don’t mention Alice’s indiscretions with Derrick.

We spend the day together, separating only while I go back to the hotel to collect my things. Before I know it, we’re ordering take-out and sitting in front of the TV like nothing ever happened.

At about a quarter past eight, Alice stretches and stands up. “I think I’m going to take a shower and get into something more comfortable.” Her smile is teasing. “Want to come with me?”

I wish she was someone else. What am I doing here? “We’re not there yet.”

“All right. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Once Alice leaves the room, I slump down, putting my head in my hands. I feel like I’m making a huge mistake.

My mind keeps drifting back to Laura. I picture her joyful smile, her vibrant laugh, and the way she moves. I remember how disappointed she looked when I made her hide for Alice. Not being with her will haunt me forever. Would she ever take me back?

A phone starts to ring. The tone isn’t mine. It’s an upbeat pop song. I look over to the arm of the sofa where Alice has left her phone. The caller ID reads a private number. You’ve got to be kidding me. Has that bitch been cheating on me all along? I tell myself it’s probably spam, but I can’t help picking it up, answering it, and holding the phone silently to my ear.

“Hey sexy,” a deep voice drawls into my ear. “Aren’t you going to say hello? No use being shy after last night. When’s the next time I’m going to be able to get my hands on that tight little ass?”

I hang up. I don’t know if the caller was Derrick or a different side piece. I don’t care.

The funny thing is that I’m not even angry. I feel relieved.

I wait for Alice to get out of the shower before saying anything. She appears in the living room with a towel wrapped around herself. She can tell immediately from the expression on my face that something is wrong. Her eyes travel from my face to the phone, and she swallows nervously.

“Is everything okay, baby?”

I hold out my hand. “I want the ring back. I should have asked for it long ago.” I nod toward her phone. “Your boyfriend called. He had a great time last night. Can’t wait to get his hands on your ‘tight little ass’ again.”

“Adam, wait.”

“No.” I take a deep breath and shake my head. “Give me the ring. It’s over. We’re over.”

She doesn’t argue. She knows there’s no coming back from this, not after all the grand speeches she made about fresh starts and family.

Nothing has changed.

She slips the ring off her finger and holds it out to me. I snatch it from her hand and grab my bag, which is still packed.

“I want you to leave this apartment,” I tell her. “I’ve spent enough time in hotels the last few months. You’ll have to find somewhere else to stay. When I get back here tomorrow, I want you to be gone.”

I make my way down to the street below and call a car. I’ve screwed things up with Laura.

I’ve blown it, big time.