“Mom, are you sure you’re okay with keeping her tonight?”

I put my cell phone on speaker, setting it down on the bathroom counter as I took a lock of my hair and ran the straightener through it. My inky long strands transformed from wavy curls to pin straight smoothness, and I loved the feeling.

“Honey, don’t worry about it at all. We’re going to make s’mores and watch movies, snuggle in my bed and then make pancakes in the morning. We’re going to have a blast. You just have a good time.”

My heart ached a little bit. I hadn’t gotten a night on my own in probably … well since Lennon had been born. She’d been with me every day since, a big issue to fight over when I’d been with Derek. I just didn’t like to leave her, but I knew that at this point, a single mommy night out was much needed.

“Well, all right. Maybe I’ll come over for breakfast with you two. I love you, Mom. Can you put Lennon on?” I took the time to layer two more coats of mascara on my eyelashes while I waited.

I heard some rustling in the background, and then a sigh. “She’s playing tea party right now, and it would be rude to leave her guests, or so she tells me. She loves you, Samantha. Go have fun, we will be fine.”

Mom hangs up before I can protest, and suddenly my apartment feels too big and quiet without my daughter. Parenthood, a blessing and a curse all rolled into one. You weren’t supposed to say things like that out loud, but I knew it was a huge blessing most of the time.

Looking at myself in the mirror, I assessed my face. Not too bad for overtired and overworked. The last two weeks had been busy but rewarding; I was finally sinking into my groove, Lennon had gone to her first week of preschool, but we couldn’t get through the night without her climbing into my bed. One night, I’d accidentally set the fire alarm off and she’d had a complete meltdown, and it took me four hours to rock her to sleep.

I’d also dwelled unnecessarily on my failed date as the months changed and I didn’t hear from Jake at all.

So when Jenna had asked if I wanted to grab a drink on Friday night, I took my opportunity to be a twenty-seven-year-old for once.

Except now, I was majorly considering taking off the skinny jeans and off-the-shoulder shirt I’d donned and instead getting in the bath. Bubbles up to my neck, a glass of wine and an erotic novel … yeah, that might be a better night than a sweaty bar and strangers.

Sighing, because I’d given my word to Jenna, I went downstairs to call an Uber. If I was going out like a twenty-something, I was going to get drunk and need a taxi like a twenty-something.

“Hello,” the driver greets me as I duck into the car ten minutes later. “Going to McFlannery’s?”

“Yes, please.” I knew of the bar, hadn’t been there in a long time. Not since college. Resting my head against the seat, I watched Washington, DC fly past me in blurs of light.

All too soon, the car is pulling up outside the bar. I thank my driver and get out, standing on the curb waiting for Jenna. I send off a text to my mom, letting her know I arrived, and then a hand is on my arm.

“Hey, girl! You look great.”

Jenna’s blond hair brushes my cheek as she leans in for a friendly greeting, and I hug her back. She’s dressed in a cute sundress, maybe too revealing for an early May night, but she looks amazing. Blue flowers dot the dress, and she’s wrapped her golden locks into one of those sleek chignons that I can never pull off. Her blue eyes are lined with makeup, and she is easily the most gorgeous girl when we enter the bar.

“It’s packed in here!” I couldn’t help but swivel my gaze around the room.

“What have you, been living under a rock? No … don’t answer that. It’s a yes, a Seattle rock. Don’t worry girl, we’ll get you back into the city life.” She patted me on the back like I was some wounded duckling.

The grin that stretched my face was genuine, and I couldn’t help but follow her as she commandeered two seats at the bar. The room teemed with people, energy and rock music bouncing off the walls. I let my body feel it, let the freeness of the night soak into my veins.

“Two tequila shots, and two Crown apples on the rocks.” Jenna slammed her hand down on the bar as if telling the shaggy-looking bartender to hop to it.

I slid onto my stool. “Wow, you’re not wasting any time, huh?”

“It’s Friday night, time to let loose. Plus, we had a long week. God, I hate giving those reports, I’m so fucking glad it’s over.” She shakes her head, not looking at me but at the men sitting around the bar.

“I think you’re jaded from sitting in an office for so long. You need to go out and visit some of the parks.” Part of the reason why I loved my job so much was that I knew where my efforts were going. I’d been in the parks, seen the good that could be done.

“Ew, bugs and dirt. No thank you!” The bartender sets our drinks down, and Jenna raises her shot glass to my own, signaling for me to up-end it.

I do, cringing before I tip it back and the tequila burns my throat. Instantly, I remember how much I hate this liquor, as the shivers and near-vomit feeling take me over. Coming up for air, I sputter and cough, grabbing the closest thing to me. Which just happens to be the apple-flavored whiskey on the rocks. I gulp it, coughing more as that burns too.

“Jeez, we need to train you a little better, huh?” Jenna’s eyes sparkle with humor.

I finally catch my breath, straightening in my chair. “You work for the national parks, and you can’t stand nature?”

She waves her hand as if to say whatever. “No one ever said you have to like your job. That’s why it’s a job. Now, which one do you think is cute?”

I look around us, checking out all of the men crowding the bar. Sure, there are some who peak my interest, but I’m so discouraged after the date with Jake that I’d rather just get drunk tonight.

“Count me out, but I’ll be a great wing woman if you need me.”

Jenna swivels her stool towards me. “Bad time with an ex?” Her eyes are all sympathy.

“Actually, no. Which is surprising, since my ex, Derek, and I were together for eight years. He gave me my daughter, Lennon, I showed you her picture … but by the end I think that we just didn’t love each other. We weren’t even friends to be honest, but the split was amicable.”

“So then why the sourpuss? I have a long history of breakups and breakdowns, and if I’m out here trying to find ‘The One,’ or at least one for right now, then you should be too.”

I sigh, taking another sip of my drink. The alcohol makes my veins buzz, and I kind of like it. “I had a pretty terrible date last month.”

“Terrible as in, he picked you up on his bike and then cried at dinner while talking about his cat that just died? ’Cause yeah, that happened to me once.”

I almost spit my drink I laugh so hard. “Okay well, not that bad. Although that sounds horrid! No, he acted like he could handle having Lennon come along with us, and at the first sight of tears, he couldn’t have sprinted fast enough to get away from us. I get it, men our age are just starting to have kids, or have no interest in them at all. But come on, grow a sack. She’s a toddler for fuck’s sake. Part of me just wishes he wouldn’t have even pretended to be okay with it in the first place.”

Jenna nods solemnly. “That sucks, hon, I’m sorry. He’s an idiot, but it doesn’t mean there isn’t someone out there who wouldn’t be a nice match. Oh! We should get you on some dating apps.”

I shiver, shaking my head. “Absolutely not. The guys on there are either looking to get between your thighs or into your bank account.”

“That’s kind of true. Okay, whatever. I’ll flirt then, and you wing woman me!” Her voice was so optimistic, I had to chuckle.

While she flirted with the men around us, or plotted her next conquest, I quietly sipped my drink, surveying the bar. As hard as it was to leave Lennon, I had to admit that I’d needed this. The energy of the bar infused youth back into my veins, and made the problems untangle from my hair for just a few hours.

It was also hilarious to watch the mating activities of men and women trying to pick each other up. How it was initiated, who bought a drink for whom, how long it took before they were either making out on the dance floor or moving on to the next partner.

“Hey there.” A cute blond slid up to Jenna, a beer bottle in his hand.

They started to talk, her giving off all of the body language that said, “I’m interested but not easy.” I had to admit, girl knew how to play it.

“Do you want a drink, he’s going to get us a round?” Jenna winked, her face turned towards me and away from him.

Not one to refuse a free drink, especially from someone I wasn’t complicity agreeing to sleep with, I nodded. “I’ll take a glass of white wine.”

“I like your friend’s style.” Blond guy smiled, and I knew he was trying to score brownie points with Jenna by being nice to her friend.

Why did dating have to be this scoreboard of keeping track and counter moves? I was exhausted just watching it.

“Oh, here’s my friend. This is Jenna and … I’m sorry I never got your name.” Blond guy ushers someone else up to the bar, and my first sip of wine tastes like sour grapes on my tongue.

“Jake.” I can’t help but spit his name out.

“Wait, your name is Jake? How funny is that … although odd for a woman.” Blond guy tips his head to the side.

“No, you idiot, her name is not Jake. Hi, Samantha.” The brown-haired guy with the strong jaw and dimple in his cheek raises an awkward hand in greeting.

“No shit, you’re Samantha. Nice to meet you, I’m Bryan.” Jake’s friend sticks his hand out for me to shake.

“Hi, nice to meet you.” My mouth is dry as I shake his hand, my eyes trained on the guy who took me on a date and never called again.

“You two know each other?” Jenna looks way too excited about this possibility.

I can tell Jake is about to speak, his clover green eyes unsure of what to say, so I cut in. “We’re old acquaintances from college. Good to see you again.”

My tone is as normal as possible when the lie comes out, and I do it for Jenna’s sake. I’m trying to have a fun night, be her wing woman, and I don’t need any drama concerning our unsuccessful date and his allergy to children’s temper-tantrums.

“So, what brings you girls out to McFlannery’s?” Bryan breaks the tense silence.

“Well, we work together and I needed to get Samantha out, she just moved back to the city. How about you all?”

Jake sips on a beer and tries to stay behind Bryan, his eyes flitting to me every once in a while. This is … weird and awkward. But I also can’t keep my tipsy gaze off of him. He looks gorgeous; like a sparkly diamond of deliciousness in a bar full of rocks.

“We live in the building next door, not together though. We’re far too established to be roommates.” Bryan rolls his eyes and Jake chuckles quietly.

I sit on my stool, directing my attention elsewhere as Jenna and Bryan get deep into conversation. My night is suddenly dimmer, the alcohol feeling sluggish in my veins rather than giving me an upping kind of buzz.

And then he blocks my view of the other side of the bar. “I just wanted to come over and apologize for what happened last month.”