Chapter Nine
Mairead licked her lips and closed her eyes in an attempt to strengthen her resolve. She rapped her knuckles lightly on Hamish’s door afraid to knock any louder. It was very early and no sound was coming from the courtyard, but that would change if anyone heard her.
She feared getting caught, but it was more important that she speak to Hamish. If she did not catch him before he left, she might not see him all day, and dinner was questionable. The man was determined to avoid her. She had hoped that had changed yesterday afternoon, but his chilly demeanor at dinner made it clear that if anything, he was more determined to keep her at a distance.
Mairead knocked again and then stopped to listen but did not hear any movement. Hesitating for only a moment, Mairead put her hand on the door and pushed. She gasped when it nudged forward for she had expected the door to be barred from the inside.
Mairead stepped inside and shivered. The room was dark and very cold. No embers glowed in the fireplace, which meant he had either not lit a fire or it had gone out hours ago. Had they not restocked his wood?
“Hamish?” Her tone was soft, but it should have awoken him, and yet there was no response. The man was either the heaviest of sleepers or he was awake, wondering what she would do next. He certainly could not be watching her. Without any windows or light from a fire, she could see only around the entrance and even that was difficult as shadows created from the torches hid more than their light revealed.
Mairead took another step, remembering that there was a table with some candles. Feeling around, she found both. Grabbing a candle, she went out, used a torch to light it, and came back in, closing the door behind her. No one was up yet, but they would be soon and she did not want to answer questions if someone decided to be curious.
Holding the candle in front of her, she looked around the room. Hamish was not a heavy sleeper. He was not even there. The room was empty. The bed was mussed, proving he had slept there, but at some point in the night he had risen and left. She did not wonder where he went. Mairead was almost certain that if she rode out to a certain valley, she would find him there.
Mairead sighed. Hamish not being here answered several questions. The man must leave and return in the middle of the night, because he always emerged from this room in the later morning hours. If she was right, he would be back any minute.
Mairead found a holder for the candle and then looked around for something to sit on. Seeing nothing, she sat down on the edge of the bed to wait. If Hamish was mad finding her in his room, she would just tell him that it was his own fault. She had been prepared to ask him for dirk training after dinner, but they were not even halfway through the meal before he excused himself. She and Selah had just gaped in silence as he loaded up his plate, grabbed a mug full of ale, and then headed out the door, stating it was time he ate with the guards. Mairead suspected that this was going to happen every night going forward. And since he was also refusing to meet in the great hall, she had little choice but to corner him this early in the morning.
A cool breeze swirled around her, causing Mairead to shiver. She glanced back at the door and verified that it was closed. So where was the breeze coming from? She rubbed her arms and again felt the movement of air. It felt like it was coming from the hearth. Mairead stood up and again felt the air stir. Grabbing the candle she went to go stand by the fireplace. It flickered and almost went out till she put up her hand to shield it.
Breezes could be felt from the fireplace, but usually only from the top floors and it had to be much windier outside than it was right now. But this hearth was on the first floor.
Carefully protecting the little flame, Mairead studied the hearth. It lacked the ornate mantel that was in some of the keep’s main rooms, but it was like any other for the most part. She shuffled back and realized that she had never realized just how huge it was though. It was even bigger than the one in the solar, making it the largest in the keep. It was so big, she could almost walk inside it. Without thought, she moved forward and stuck her head into the charred structure. Immediately she felt the cool air and turned toward the source. Her eyes grew large. There was a large crack in the wall.
Completely focused on what she was seeing, Mairead stepped fully inside the hearth and then moved closer to examine the crack. She quickly deduced it was not a crack, but an opening. Using one hand, she pried it open, surprised it took little effort. She once again held out the candle, which now illuminated a narrow but traversable passageway.
Mairead stood there shocked. She had it all wrong. Hamish would not be back any minute. He had probably just left.
She began to chuckle. I sleep, Hamish had said. She had been asking the wrong question. But Mairead now had a new one. How did Hamish know there was a secret passageway? Mairead felt both impressed and frustrated. It must have been here twelve years ago. All this time, and she had never known. Did Selah? Did Robert? She highly doubted it.
Mairead bit her bottom lip and grinned, delighted with her discovery. She then followed the narrow tunnel to where it exited out near the village. Several discarded items were piled near the exit and she made sure nothing was disturbed and that she had remained unseen. After returning to his chambers, Mairead left and went back to her room, being careful not to make any loud noise.
Back safely inside her own bedchambers, she quietly closed the door and then quickly began to undress. If she was lucky, she could catch a couple of hours sleep for she was going to need them.
Nestled back in the covers, Mairead closed her eyes. She was still grinning.
She no longer needed luck to convince Hamish to teach her how to defend herself with a dirk. She now had all the leverage she needed.
* * *
Mairead’s eyes flashed with a sudden shower of angry sparks upon hearing his refusal. “If you don’t, then I will tell Selah and Robert about the secret passageway leading to the village from the hearth in your room. I might even tell them about the valley and that you have intentionally kept them in the dark about your plans.”
Hamish stared down at her without expression, without moving a muscle. The lines around his eyes and mouth etched deeper than ever before as his lips curled into a smile that held no humor . . . only menace. “Then do it.”
The biting words sent a chill through Mairead and she knew she had gone too far.
Hamish spun on his heel and was headed out the great hall doors. The noon meal was over and she had convinced Selah to leave early, giving her a chance to speak with Hamish privately. He had recognized what she was doing and attempted to leave as well, but Mairead had stopped him. Then she had tried everything, asking, persuading, even begging him to agree to train her on how to use the dirk. When nothing worked, she had made the threat. And she wished she could take it back.
Regret assailed her and she ran to block his path. “I’m sorry, Hamish. Really. I did not mean . . . I just need your help.”
His green eyes had grown dark and cold, and they bore down on her. “Understand this. I could leave right now and it will not be my home or my life uprooted in a few weeks. It will be yours.”
A thin chill hung on the edge of his words. He had spoken them too gently, too softly. He had meant every word and it set her on the edge. She was about to lose everything when all she wanted was a way to protect herself when he left.
Hamish gave Mairead one last hard look and stepped around her. She closed her eyes as grief and despair tore at her heart. She had seen in his eyes what she had done. To her family, to herself, but mostly to Hamish. Her threat had decimated the trust that had been growing between them. She was now one of the many women who had disappointed him. And it killed her. He needed to know that she did not mean it.
“Hamish, wait!” she called out again. He did not stop. She ran up to him and caught his arm just as it reached out to open the door.
Hamish looked down. “Let go.”
Mairead shook her head. Tears slipped down her cheeks. “Please listen to me first. Please,” she begged. “I would never betray you. I was just desperate for your help. For you to understand. I thought it was the only way. But I would not have gone to Robert or Selah. I swear it.”
Hamish turned to face her. He grabbed her upper arms and gave her a shake. “What, Mairead, just what do I need to understand that would make you risk your sister, Robert, little Rab, your home?”
Mairead closed her eyes, her heart aching with pain. “I just needed you to realize how much I need your help. There is no one else who can teach me what I need to know. You saw the guards yesterday. None of them has the ability and even if they did, I don’t trust them. And you said I couldn’t protect myself with the sword. And that is all I want. To be able to protect myself, so I said something stupid to get you to agree. But I never meant it. Please don’t leave.”
The anger in his countenance began to dissipate. “You need to be trained that badly?”
Mairead gulped. “I do.”
Hamish took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. His anger was returning tenfold, but this time it was not aimed at Mairead. “You are being threatened.”
Mairead bit her bottom lip and then nodded. To say different would be pointless. “I was and no, Robert and Selah do not know about it. Nor do I want them to know. Their way of handling things . . . well, it just wouldn’t work.” Hamish did not doubt it. Robert would probably advocate talking. “So please do not tell them. Please believe that I have my reasons.”
Mairead’s hazel eyes held so much despair that he could no longer look in them. This latest request, her fear, her persistence, her damn marriage-seeking quest . . . it all now made sense. Never had he been so mad.
Hamish grabbed the handle and without another word, left.