A few days later they flew to Tampa airport before taking a rental car to the Stones’ home in Palm Cove.

“I had no idea how lucky I was to get a flight at this time of year,” Lisa confessed. “How did you organise it?”

“Persistence and a whole lot of luck.” He brushed her concerns away with a wave of his hand.

“What you’re saying is that you encouraged me to leave my friend and the centre, who both need me, when you didn’t even know if you could get a flight for me?”

He shrugged with indifference. “You’re here.” He pointed outside. “Aren’t you glad you decided to come? Besides, I know you made a ton of meals for Charlotte before you came.”

“So sue me.” She poked her finger on his strong shoulder.

They shared a laugh while he drove. “It’s a busy time, everyone wants to see their family for the holidays.”

Lisa took in the outside scenery that was bathed in sunshine and said, “It’s nice to have some warm weather after the chill of New York. No wonder people retire here, it’s lovely.” She turned to look at his profile. “Tell me about Tom and his parents.”

“We were next door neighbours and the same age. We went to school together from kindergarten to senior year in high school.” His words were slow and meticulous but she could see the strain around his eyes. She didn’t know the exact date of Tom’s death but knew the anniversary was soon. The imminent pain and loss was obviously causing Gabe to not sleep well.

Placing a reassuring hand on his forearm she said, “I still don’t know how he died. Will you tell me?”

Grief made the skin along his jaw tighten and he sucked in a sharp breath but didn’t reply.

“I’m sorry, Gabe, I just can’t stay at their place if I don’t know.”

He gave her a small smile. “You’re right, but even talking about it is still hard. Tom joined the army. He loved it. At school he was liked but never in the popular crowd, you know?”

His attention returned to the traffic before he continued. “In the army, he became a different person. More outgoing and more self-assured. He was deployed in the Middle East, proud to serve his country. Then after ten years, he came back unexpectedly, confessing that his parents needed him.” Gabe took a deep breath before wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.

“His father, Dan, had colon cancer and Tom said he needed to be with his parents. But after his father’s successful treatment, Tom resigned from the army.” Gabe’s voice croaked and he cleared his throat a couple of times. “He was having nightmares and couldn’t hold down a job. I offered him help, paid for him to see someone, and gave him a job in one of my salons in Manhattan.”

Gabe stopped talking and just drove. A couple of minutes later, the words came out. “I called the manager every day, Tom seemed to be settling in. He swept the hairs on the floors, chatted with the customers, and made them a coffee. I was proud of him but then a few weeks later, he was dead. He’d killed himself thanks to the PTSD demons that plagued him.” His voice croaked and Lisa’s heart missed a beat.

A sob came from his lips before he veered across the traffic to the service lane and killed the engine. Turning to her, his eyes were filled with the loss of a friend as he said, “I can’t believe he’s gone. I still miss him every day. I blame myself that I wasn’t a better friend for him.”

Her heart clenched with the obvious distress he was dealing with. “Gabe, you can’t―”

He silenced her with a “shush” and held up his hand. “I blame myself. I knew something happened while he’d been in the army. He never spoke about it but I tried to get him help.” He bit his lip. “I-I…don’t want to talk about it anymore.”

Her heart physically ached seeing the mask of pain and grief on his face. In that moment, she wondered if coming to Florida had been a wise decision. Would staying with the Stones only add to their grief? To their heartache?

“Maybe I should stay elsewhere?” she offered.

“No.” He swivelled in his seat to face her. “I want you here, I need you.” His hand took hers, his touch was gentle and reassuring.

“Are you sure?”

“I have been alone since the day I lost Tom. I’ve pushed everyone away, including my family.” He pressed his lips against her knuckles. “We’ve known each other barely a week but having you here is important to me. Your bright smile and ability to see the good in people is the tonic that I need, especially over the next few days.”

His honesty made her lungs squeeze with disbelief and emotion. “I don’t know what to say.”

“Just be you, that’s all I need.” He kissed the pulse point at her wrist.

She nodded and again wondered if she’d made the right decision to come with him to Florida. But then she reflected on his kindness toward her and knew she was meant to be here.

“I need to ask again, will the Stones mind me coming at such a difficult time?”

He continued to hold her hand. “No. They’re happy you’re coming with me.”

* * *

A while later, they’d arrived at Judy and Dan Stone’s home in Palm Cove and been warmly received.

The house was massive and too big for the two of them but Judy explained, showing Lisa her room, “We have two daughters and we love when they come with their families to stay with us at Christmas.” The older woman showed her around and pointed to the bathroom. “Why don’t you freshen up while I get the refreshments?”

It only took Lisa a few minutes before she joined Judy, Dan, and Gabe in the living room.

Large windows opened and showcased a lush green lawn and a well-manicured garden. “It’s lovely,” Lisa remarked.

They sat on the sofa, a low coffee table in the middle with a plate of cookies and a large jug of iced tea.

Leaning into the softness of the cushions, Lisa took a deep breath of warm air, closed her eyes, and gave out a grateful sigh. Staying at this lovely retirement home wouldn’t be difficult.

Over the next half hour they talked about inconsequential things like Lisa’s career, her travels to New York City, and Gabe’s work.

Lisa’s palms grew sweaty and her heart rate picked up, and she realised there was a white elephant in the room that no one was talking about. Tom. Pictures of him graced the side-board and the walls. It wasn’t hard to determine how proud the Stones had been of their son.

Judy caught her staring at a pic of Tom and Gabe as young men in their early twenties. They were smiling broadly with Tom in his army uniform and Gabe wearing a tailored suit.

Pointing to the photo, Judy looked at Gabe and said, “Remember how Tom was here when you graduated? His leave coincided with your graduation. You two didn’t stop grinning for a week.”

Gabe gave Judy a pained smile as he stared at the photo and silence filled the room.

Lisa decided to fill it. “What a wonderful experience for you, Gabe, having Tom there.”

Gabe nodded dutifully, his gaze remaining on the photo.

Taking a steadying breath, Lisa decided to say something. Something about Tom. The number of photos indicated that he had been much loved and was missed by his parents. “Gabe told me how you’ve known the Olivaris for years and that Tom and Gabe were at school together.”

A silent pause hung in the air and Lisa looked at the expressions on Judy and Dan’s faces. Shock. Relief. Anguish. Love.

Lisa couldn’t breathe. Her lungs stilled. Her heart stilled. Had she crossed a line that she shouldn’t have?

Gabe threw her an infuriated look but it was Judy’s voice that broke the noiseless room. “Yes, we were neighbours for years and still would be if we hadn’t moved here.”

Not wanting to mention the obvious, Lisa kept the conversation light. “I can see why. It’s beautiful here, the weather is warmer and you’ve got the theme parks nearby, perfect for when your daughters are here.”

Up to now, Dan hadn’t said much but his shoulders straightened and he said, “We love New York but this is the place to retire to. It’s a good place for the grandchildren to visit.”

“I can see why,” Lisa added with genuine enthusiasm. “This estate is stunning, I’d love to live here.”

The conversation from then on became more lively and animated, before they started talking about Tom. His parents shared stories of him growing up and how they became friendly with the Olivaris through the friendship of their sons.

Then somehow the conversation turned pensive on how much they missed their son. There weren’t tears but rather introspective memories that reflected his life as a strong, caring, brave man who loved his family.

Judy placed a warm hand on Lisa’s. “We miss Tom every day, there are times I want to call him and I have to catch myself. Many of our friends don’t want to talk to us about him, worried they’ll offend us or make us cry.” She paused and used a hanky to dab her eyes dry. “But he was our son, we miss him, and we need to talk about him. It’s our connection to him.”

Lisa’s heart squeezed tight with emotion, unable to comprehend the grief they’d endured. Not only losing their son but wondering if there’d been something they could’ve done to prevent his suicide.

With a low voice she said, “I can’t imagine the pain you’ve been through, the hurt of not having Tom here, but I understand the idea of connecting to him. In Judaism we do things to honour the dead. Not by building a plaque or having a memorial. We do something that’s active and will help someone else.” She paused, again wondering if she was speaking out of turn, however, she stole a quick look at Dan and could see him leaning on his elbows toward her. His face showed interest, keenness, and some of the shadows of sadness had dissipated.

“You could raise money for a trust fund or do something to help others through your fund raising. By using Tom’s name, you’re not only keeping his name alive but you’re honouring his memory,” she explained.

Judy’s face creased with fascination, before she turned to her husband. “What do you think, Dan? I love the idea.”

Dan nodded slowly as though he was still thinking and reflecting on the initiative. “I like it.” Looking at Lisa he said, “What do you suggest?”

She paused, thinking about ways that would be meaningful and relate back to Tom. “It’s really up to you,” she said. “But you could look at a scholarship or―”

“A vets PTSD support network,” Gabe said in a low voice, interrupting her with an idea that was valid and worthy. “Something that would assist vets returning home and fitting back in to civilian life.”

“Gabe, that’s a brilliant idea.” She leaned over to kiss his cheek.

Both Judy and Dan nodded in agreement, giving their approval.

Their fundraising wouldn’t help Tom but perhaps they could do something for another family so they wouldn’t have to go through the unbearable loss that they’d been through.

Later that night, after dinner, the four of them were around the kitchen table enjoying a dessert of homemade apple pie and ice cream.

“Judy, this is delicious. Lucky I’ll be doing a lot of walking tomorrow,” she said, patting her stomach.

Judy’s gaze took in Lisa’s now empty plate and beamed with pride, clearly delighted with Lisa’s good appetite. “Which park are you going to?”

Lisa scratched her head. “Gosh, I’m doing them all. Is it Universal tomorrow or Tuesday?” She looked at Gabe for help.

“Universal is tomorrow,” he confirmed.

“You two will have a great time together.” Judy gave him a warm smile.

Gabe’s brow furrowed in reply. “No, I’m taking her there but will come back to be with you.”

Dan leaned forward to look at Gabe across the table. “You’re going to drive a two-hour round trip? And then come back to be with us?” When Dan spoke it out loud, the idea was ludicrous. Because Gabe had to pick her up at night. That was at least four hours of driving in one day.

She’d been happy to catch a bus but Gabe had insisted on driving.

“Lisa doesn’t feel comfortable driving on the highways, especially as our roads are opposite to Australia. They drive on the left, not the right. I don’t want her having an accident.”

“That’s very generous of you but shouldn’t you stay with her?”

A quizzical look crossed Gabe’s eyes. “No, why? I came here to be with you.”

Dan cleared his throat. “Gabe, you will always be welcome here but we” ―he pointed to himself and his wife― “think you should be with Lisa.”

A stunned silence hung in the air. “But I spend time with you at the yotzheit, the anniversary of Tom’s death.”

Dan clapped a large hand on Gabe’s shoulder. “But you’re here now and we love seeing you, but you should go with Lisa,” he said in an encouraging voice.

“I don’t know what to say.” Gabe sat back in his seat, his shoulders slouched and his mouth in a grim line, clearly disappointed.

Hope had soared in her chest, loving the idea that she and Gabe would be together but it came crashing down in a ball of fire when she caught the dark, determined look in his eyes. It was, as he said in New York. She was on her own during the day.

A wedge of embarrassment became lodged in her throat despite a drink of water. Despite encouragement, Gabe wanted to stay here and not be with her. It was the reminder, yet again, that what they had was only temporary, despite the fun and kisses they’d shared.

She excused herself. She didn’t really need to go to the bathroom, but obviously, he wanted some privacy with Tom’s parents.

Curiosity got the better of her and instead she hid around the corner, determined to hear what he had to say. It was wrong but she needed an insight into him. What was driving him and what was holding him back? He wasn’t going to tell her, maybe he’d tell them?

Gabe started. “I really like Lisa, I like Lisa more than I’ve ever liked a woman before.”

“We can tell, you two only have eyes for each other,” Judy said, her voice filled with motherly pride. “So what’s the problem?”

“I can’t commit to her,” he said in a remorseful tone.

“Because she’s from Australia?” Judy asked.

“Well, that is an issue but not the main one.” She heard the chair move and she assumed Gabe was leaning back in it. “I can’t let go of the past. How can I be happy when I let my best friend down? I feel like I didn’t do enough for him. I wasn’t a good enough friend. The pain consumes me and I can’t just turn it off, like a switch.”

A stunned silence hung around the table and Lisa chocked back a sob at his confession. The pain of what he was going through made her heart physically ache for him.

They started talking and despite Judy and Dan’s reassurances that he wasn’t responsible, Gabe was resolute. In his mind, he was.

“But you got Tom to attend counselling, something we couldn’t get him to do. And you gave him a job.” Dan’s voice was filled with torment. “You tried.”

“But it wasn’t enough. I wasn’t enough.” His voice lifted and Lisa scuttled to the bathroom secure in the knowledge that nothing could come of their blossoming relationship.

Gabe was right. He couldn’t snap away three years of angst. Only he could let go of the past to move forward and from listening to him, he wasn’t prepared to, or rather, he couldn’t do that. He’d been upfront with her in New York at the skating but now she knew the details. Despite his generosity, kindness and outgoing nature, he could never be hers.

Even though she’d known him such a short time, she’d fallen for him and would’ve loved to have taken their relationship further. If Gabe truly loved her, she’d leave her family and move to New York to have a meaningful life with a man who was perfect for her. And it wasn’t just because he was Jewish and had similar values as her, although that helped. She knew he’d never cheat on her, he’d never lie to her, he’d never reproach or humiliate her.

Shame really. They were a good match. Even if Gabe couldn’t see that but she couldn’t make him change his mind. Either he wanted her or didn’t.

With a downcast gaze, she closed her bedroom door with a click, knowing she was shutting the door between them.