Chapter Fourteen
Elizabeth stood beside Robert the next night on the dais as the king announced that they were to be married, and that Robert was welcomed once more into the king’s good graces. After the applause from the courtiers died, the king glanced between Elizabeth and Robert, then settled his gaze on Robert. “We will journey to your manor in Essex for you to wed Elizabeth.”
“My manor?” Robert asked, his surprise evident.
“Yes,” the king replied with a sly grin. “Did I not tell you that if you would but pay me homage, I would make you wealthy once again and return your holdings to you? Writtle is the first of your homes that I am returning to you. I thought you’d like to be wed there, since I know it is your favorite manor.”
Elizabeth frowned that she did not know such a detail about Robert but the king did.
Robert smiled, his eyes wary, but an excited expression on his face. “I thank ye,” he said, as was expected, and then he looked to Elizabeth. “Ye’ll love Writtle! I spent a great deal of time there as a child, and later, after I completed my training to be a knight.”
She opened her mouth to reply, but the king spoke. “Come, Bruce,” he boomed, throwing his arm over Robert’s shoulders. “De Burgh and I have much to discuss with you now that we are on the same side of the fight. I’ve called the Prince to me for him to aid us in battles soon, and we can discuss strategy.”
Elizabeth tensed at the king speaking of his oldest son being summoned for war strategy. Robert would have to be very careful not to slip with so many watching him. Their eyes met for a brief moment before the king and her father led him off the dais. She was left standing with the queen, who shoved herself up with a grunt and held her hand out to Elizabeth. “Come, Elizabeth. I trust none of my ladies-in-waiting nor my maids to pack my things as you can. You will see to my wardrobe and then yours so that we are ready to depart by week’s end.”
Elizabeth nodded, her pulse speeding up, knowing the week was sure to pass quickly.
It went by in a blur of activity, though Elizabeth spent most of her time at the queen’s side preparing her and then herself for the journey to Essex. She saw Robert only at supper, and when she did, they could not really speak from their hearts, as the king now treated Robert like a favored son, engaging him in all manner of conversation.
The day they all set out for the long journey to Essex, Elizabeth had but a brief moment alone with Robert. He stood beside the carriage that she was to ride in with the queen, and he grabbed her face and kissed her. She did not care that people could see.
“I’ve missed you,” she whispered fiercely.
“And I, ye,” he assured her, his gaze darting around them, searching for eavesdroppers. The queen and king were just in the distance walking toward them. “It will nae stay like this, I promise,” he vowed. “But I must make him think he has won.”
“I know,” she replied and squeezed his hand. “Don’t worry for me.”
“Aye, but I do, lass—always. When we stop for a respite, I will find ye.”
She nodded but could say no more as the queen and king approached.
The king’s brow furrowed as he looked to her. “Goddaughter, why do you look worried?”
Elizabeth’s mind seemed to freeze, and no quick answer would come to her. Thankfully, the queen scowled at her husband and said, “Edward, surely you have not forgotten her cousin Lillianna was never found.” The queen settled a concerned gaze on Elizabeth. “Are you thinking of her?”
Elizabeth nodded, relieved for the excuse. She would be more concerned about Lillianna if she were not in Angus’s care. The Scot would see her to safety, and he seemed more than capable of defending Lillianna. Elizabeth licked her lips. “I wish she had been found,” she said, disliking the way the king now seemed to scrutinize her.
“Yes,” he said slowly, “as do I. But I suppose we must assume the wolves ate her.”
“Edward!” the queen gasped.
He shrugged. “I am sorry, but it is the truth. It benefits no one to ignore the truth. Does it, Elizabeth?”
Her body tingled with fear. She felt certain he knew something and was simply not acting upon it. But why would he not? She forced a smile to her lips and nodded, feeling Robert’s reassuring presence beside her. “No, Your Majesty, it does not. Facing the truth is always wisest.”
His mouth twisted into the semblance of a smile, and then true to his ever-swinging moods, a dark look swept his face. He pointed to the nearest guard. “Why do you stand there, fool? Aid the queen into the carriage now!” With that, the king pressed a kiss to the queen’s hand and strode toward his mount.
A tense silence fell between Robert, the queen, and Elizabeth as the young guard scrambled to do as the king had bidden. Once the queen was settled into her seat, Robert helped Elizabeth into the carriage and then squeezed her hand before departing.
The carriage started moving almost immediately, and the queen looked to Elizabeth. “I’m sorry for his unkind words about your cousin. Edward is likely angry at himself for her loss. He cares deeply for all his vassals.”
Elizabeth truly liked the queen. She seemed to have a good heart, though she was mostly blind to the cruelty of the king. Yet such a thing could not be uttered, so Elizabeth merely said, “I’m certain you must be right.”
The queen smiled brightly. “I personally think your cousin fell in love with a local villager and ran off with him.”
Elizabeth stared at the queen in complete shock. How had she missed that the queen was such a romantic? She supposed they had never had a personal conversation that would have revealed such a thing. The queen also clearly did not know that Lillianna had been kept in the dungeon and had never had the opportunity to meet a man from the village. Still, it was a good excuse to cling to. “I’d like to think that as well,” Elizabeth said.
“Then let us. Now”—she offered Elizabeth a sly look—“as your mother is not here, I feel it’s my duty to tell you how to be a proper wife.”
The queen’s words immediately made Elizabeth think of Robert and his intimate instruction on being a Scottish wife. She nodded to the queen, and Margaret began speaking.
As the queen chattered away, Elizabeth slowly recalled every moment of giving her body to Robert. She longed to be with him again, to feel the closeness it brought, but she knew during the journey it would be impossible.
So lost was she in her thoughts of him, that when the carriage stopped long later, she blinked in surprise and glanced out of the brancard, grinning when she saw Robert approaching the carriage.
“Elizabeth,” the queen said, “would you mind fetching me some ginger or mint from the woods to settle my stomach?”
Just then, the carriage door opened, and Robert stood there, snatching Elizabeth’s breath with the heated gaze he settled on her. “Yer Majesty,” he said, bowing to the queen. “Might I walk with Elizabeth for a moment?”
The queen offered a devious smile. “You may accompany her into the woods on the errand I have set her to. My stomach ails me, and she is to find me ginger or mint.”
“Thank you,” Elizabeth said to the queen, suspecting that she had set Elizabeth to this errand specifically so she could have a moment alone with Robert.
The queen chuckled. “I saw you daydreaming, my dear. I recall well the early feelings I had for the king. Time is precious short. Use this gift.”
Elizabeth knew it too well, so she slipped her hand into Robert’s, and he helped her out of the carriage. Once she was in the open air, she leaned toward him and sighed in contentment at his nearness, his heat, his scent of fresh pine and mead. She wanted to find a shady spot and lie curled against him, yet she knew it would not happen this day. To have him so close, to touch him but for a few minutes would have to suffice.
As they strolled away from the others, Robert stroked her forearm. “I wish for another lesson on how to be a proper Scottish wife,” she said, teasing him.
The heated look he gave her curled her toes. “Oh, aye? Well, proper Scottish wives know well what to do when they get their husbands alone in the forest.”
She stopped, as they had already entered the canopy of green trees and the traveling party had disappeared from view. She faced Robert. “You will have to show me, since I’m not yet your wife.”
His mouth curved into a sensual smile, and the air around them and between them felt electrified. He curled his strong fingers around her shoulders and pulled her close, then captured her mouth with a passionate kiss that tasted of yearning, desperation, and love. Her blood surged from her fingertips to her toes as his hands came to her waist and then his arms encircled her.
He lifted her and backed her against a tree to press kisses to her face, her neck, her collarbone, and her mouth again. The kiss was a vow of his love, and when it was over, he pulled away, and they stared silently into each other’s eyes, until their breathing had quieted.
“I wish I had time to ruck up yer skirts and give ye yer next lesson,” he said, his voice a deep rumble from his chest that tightened her belly.
“I wish you did, too,” she assured him.
“I can see yer desire for me in yer eyes,” he said, brushing his lips to hers. “It pleases me to see ye want me as much as I want ye.” He traced a finger near her right eye and down the slope of her cheekbone. “I feel yer need for me in yer kiss. It amazes me how I do nae even need words from ye to know what ye are feeling.”
She nodded. “Me too.”
He sighed and leaned his forehead against hers. “But since we have only a brief time, and God only knows when we will be alone next, let us discuss a few things.”
She nodded, looking down at their hands as he intertwined their fingers. “Has the queen let anything slip about Ettrick Forest, my men, Angus, Fraser, or the king’s men?”
His questions came rapid-fire, his tension apparent. She squeezed his hands. “No, I’m sorry. I have listened carefully when she speaks with Edward, and it is always of the babe. I will try to make mention of it and see how she reacts. She did speak of Lillianna.”
“What did she say?”
“She wants to believe that Lillianna met a villager, fell in love, and ran off.” Elizabeth looked at Robert as she recalled feeling as if the king must know something. “Robert, did you get the sense that the king knew something of Lillianna’s disappearance?”
He released her hands, pulled away from her, and paced. “Aye, but if the king and yer father know Lillianna fled with Angus, why would they nae say so? Why would they nae, at the very least, question us?” She started to respond, but Robert continued before she could get a word out. “Nae having answers is driving me mad! Do they know or nae? And where the devil is Angus? I would have thought he would have returned or found a way to get word to me by now. Aye, the journey to Ettrick was long. Aye, I know he had Lillianna to care for. But where is he?” Robert swung toward her.
She opened her mouth to answer, but she realized by the anguished look on his face that he simply needed to talk. She was the only one he could let see his worry. She went to him and wrapped her arms around him. “And now we have departed court. That must vex you even more.”
“Aye!” He buried his head against her neck. “I am here, playing a game that I hope will bring Scotland to freedom, but what if it does nae? What if I have cost Angus his life? What if I sent him into a trap set by yer father and the king? What if I have cost your cousin her life?”
His words mirrored her own sudden fears, but she would not show that to him. He needed strength from her in this moment. She cupped his face. “Lillianna wanted to go. She knew the risks, and staying here would have been like a death sentence to her. As for Angus, he knew he was riding out in danger, Robert. He chose to risk his life for Scotland’s freedom, just as you have chosen to do.”
“Aye, but I could have gone instead.” His gaze raked over her, but he did not say any more.
She bit her lip, wondering what he was thinking but afraid to ask. What if he was second-guessing allowing himself to feel for her? “Come,” he said abruptly. “Let us find what the queen requires.” He took her hand, and together, they walked down a dirt path covered with gnarled, thick tree roots, bushes, and plants.
Robert paused and kneeled before a dark, leafy plant. “Here is yer mint.”
“I’d not seen it,” she said, crouching in front of the plant beside him. “My mother taught me some of the plants, but how did you know this was mint?”
“Angus’s sister,” Robert said. “She’s a healer, and she was insistent when the rebellion started that Angus and I learn the plants we may need to survive, should we ever have to take to hiding in the woods.” He reached out, plucked off a sprig of the plant, and held it out to her. When she took it, he surprised her by slipping one arm under her legs and one around her waist. Before she knew what he was doing, he had deftly sat and deposited her onto his lap.
“Now that we have the mint, we can sit for a short spell before we have to return.”
She nodded and nuzzled against him, simply enjoying the steady rhythm of his breathing and his arms encircling her, heavy, warm, and reassuring. He hummed under his breath, and she stilled, listening to the smooth cadence of his rich voice. She gloried in the moment of his feeling so free with her, and then he started to sing, and a warmth, like the sun upon her face in the midsummer day, filled her.
“Oh, the wintertime is upon us
And the air is turning colder
We must find shelter
Will ye go with me, lass, will ye go?
We’ll make our home together
In the snow covered mountains
And will live there forever
Will ye go with me, lass, will ye go?”
She let out a happy sigh, and he squeezed her tighter as he let the words fade and only his humming remained.
“What’s that called?” she asked.
“I could nae say.” He brushed his lips against her neck. “I heard Angus’s younger brother singing it so often that the words stuck in my head. I asked him once what it was called, and he did nae know, either. He’d heard it from his grandmother.”
“It makes me feel…” She did not have proper words to describe it.
“Aye, I know what ye mean. It makes me feel verra light every time I hear it, as if I do nae have cares. Every time I see ye, I get that tune in my head.”
“Sing it for me again, please.”
And he did. They sat that way for as long as they dared, their unfinished conversations dangling between them, but the stolen moment to pretend their enemies could not hurt them or rip them apart was more important than words.
After Robert’s voice had trailed to silence, she tilted her head back to look up at him. “We must return,” he said, his voice heavy with reluctance.
She nodded, and he helped her up, twining their fingers once again. In her other hand, she clutched the mint he had found. As they walked back the way they had come, he said, “Find a reason to come to the woods each day when we stop for our respite, and I will find a way to meet ye.”
“I will, I promise.”
He squeezed her hand as they grew close to the assembled carriages. “What do ye think of in the carriage as we journey?” he asked.
“You,” she said, honestly. “I recalled our joining,” she admitted, a blush heating her face.
He grinned at that. “As did I,” he replied, but fell silent, his face serious now.
“You thought of your men as well, didn’t you.”
“Aye,” he said. “I think of them and my brothers always and all the other people relying on me as well. They are on my mind every moment and now”—his dark eyes captured hers—“so are ye. I pray for the strength to protect ye and to do what I must to lead Scotland to freedom.” He stopped at the carriage Elizabeth shared with the queen, and when he reached for the door to open it, Elizabeth tugged his arm back.
“You are strong, Robert,” she whispered. “You will triumph.”
“I hope so, lass, for if I do nae, I fear greatly what I will bring upon yer head.”
“Elizabeth!” the queen called out. “Come inside the carriage. I’m truly in need of the herb now.”
With a lingering look to Robert, Elizabeth rejoined the queen, but her heart and mind stayed with Robert.
Each day of the journey, she came up with a new reason to go into the woods, and the queen indulged her, as did the king and her father. She suspected they did so because they believed the more she drew Robert to her, the better she would be at getting information from him. Whatever the reason, she lived for the brief time she got to spend with him, and she learned things about him on the trip that helped complete the picture of the honorable man he was.
Her favorite thing he told her, because it so matched how she thought of him, was about the day Robert had saved Angus. He had only been fourteen summers, and he had ridden back for Angus when Angus had been knocked from his horse, despite Robert’s grandfather forbidding him to do so. Even at such a young age, Robert had already been trying to save people in need at peril to himself.
As they walked, she thought about the story he had been telling her. “What happened after you returned for Angus?”
“Och, nae much. He was about to get his big head cut off, and I put my sword through the man’s back. That was the first man I ever killed, and I cried like a wee bairn. My father gave me a beating for the cowardly display.”
She stopped and looked at him. “You are no coward. You have compassion. Your father was shortsighted to try to beat it out of you. You will be a great king one day because you care.”
“Ye are already blind to my faults,” he said, pulling her to him and kissing her. “I like that verra much.” He winked.