Isabelle begged and begged for me to go out and it took a lot of insisting on her part. I gave up denying her and finally gave in and promised her a night out. Since the bar dilemma I’ve had a hard time trusting myself anywhere there’s a possibility of alcohol and guys. I have no interest in boys, drinking, or thinking of anything but what’s in store for me.
I got the phone call of a lifetime this morning, it being the only reason I finally decided to go out with Isabelle. Full of energy and a smile on my face I leave my apartment, not once checking my peephole and making sure the coast is clear. I don’t even care if I run into Elliot, and as soon as that thought crosses my mind, he’s right before me. A simple “hey” and I continue on my way.
“I can’t believe it,” Isabelle bounces next to me in the taxi full of excitement
Meanwhile, I’m staring out the window wishing I’d said more than hey to Elliot. He stood there so fucking sexy in his jeans and polo shirt, I was jealous of the girl that gets to go out with him every night dressed in jeans showing off his junk. So, I looked, sue me. He’s still on my mind.
“Earth to Melody, are you here?” I finally realize Isabelle is running her mouth.
“Sorry, I was in thought,” I admit.
“So, when do you leave?”
“Next week,” I remember the phone call I had received this morning.
“I’m so jealous, I wish I could go with you,” she whines and I so wish she could go as well, I’m nervous just thinking about it, “Robert Mendoza is so dreamy,” she bats her eyes and puts on the most dramatic fake faint.
“I know, I still can’t believe I get to meet him, in Los Angeles of all places.”
The fall leaves of autumn spread across the sidewalks of New York City. The empire state building is lit up; the bright city lights and passing cars make me realize this will always be my city. It’s wild and crazy, but one city that counts on each other and helps anyone in need. It will always be home, regardless. However, I am looking forward to Los Angeles, the heat, the bright happy people – I assume they’re bright happy people – and the beach, most definitely the beach. I’ve never left New York City, maybe a trip to Florida once when my father had a movie shoot, but most of the time, I stayed home with Rosa. I always enjoyed the comfort of my home.
Arriving at La Esquina, a bar and grill in the city, I’m ready to celebrate my work in progress with Robert Mendoza – look him up, he’s one passionate violin playing.
“So, don’t get mad, but we’re meeting with Ethan,” Isabelle has a grip on my hand as she leads me to a table.
“What the fuck Isabelle? I thought we were going to eat alone?” I admit, I’m a little upset.
“Ethan mentioned bringing a friend that needed to get out and mingle, he’s been through a bad breakup, and I know you haven’t had the easiest few months, so I thought this would be a good time,” she explains.
“But today we’re supposed to celebrate my success,” I huff.
“Exactly, perfect time for you to get to know some people, you’ll be in a good mood,” she teases.
“Fuck my life,” I sigh and roll my eyes.
“Hey girls, I’d like you to meet,” I just stare and interrupt.
“You’ve gotta be shitting me,” I shake my head.
“Elliot?” Isabelle finishes my thought.
“You know each other?” Ethan is surprised.
“Elliot and I used to date,” I laugh, “Hey,” I smile at Elliot.
“Hey,” he responds.
“Well, isn’t that something. You’re the bad breakup?” Ethan never holds back.
“Ethan!” Isabelle scolds him.
“It appears I am,” I stare into Elliot’s eyes.
“I had no idea you would be here,” he sounds sad.
“It’s okay. We’re here now, might as well eat,” the growl running through my stomach reminds me of my hunger.
“Exactly,” Isabelle sits down as we join the boys at the table.
Discussing Ethan and Isabelle’s relationship, Elliot and I are subdued into our own food and either just agree or stare at each other. His smile makes me want to melt. Appreciating the fact, we can sit across from each other and actually be civil makes me feel a thousand times better.
“You’re leaving?” he asks.
“Huh?” I’m clueless what I had just missed beings I was in thought – yes, thinking of him.
“I’m sorry, it slipped,” Isabelle apologizes.
“Oh? Los Angeles? Yes. I leave tomorrow.”
“For how long?” he’s curious.
“I’m not sure. Could be a few days, months, hell maybe even a year,” I’m semi honest.
“Wow, that’s a long time,” he looks a little sad.
“It’s fucking awesome, she gets to meet Robert Mendoza,” Isabelle is overwhelmed with joy.
“My god woman, you sound like you’re going there instead of her,” Ethan points out her excitement.
“I just think it’s flipping awesome!”
The two are so involved in their own conversation; they don’t even realize we’re still sitting at the same table.
“Would you like to take a walk?”
“I got the bill,” Isabelle nods her head in agreement of the walk.
With the cold chill in the air I’m more than glad I decided to wear a thick sweater, but had I known I would be walking with Elliot, of all people, I would’ve put on flats rather than these heels.
“You look very pretty tonight,” his compliment catching me totally off guard.
“Thanks,” I think?
“I miss you, Melody.”
“Elliot!”
“I know, I know it’s over, but I wanted you to know I miss you, every single day I think of you,” he pours his heart out to me.
“I know how you feel, but it won’t ever work, Elliot.” I hate to be the one to continuously break his heart.
“There’s nothing I can do?”
“Nothing.”
“Are you excited about the trip to Los Angeles?”
“Beyond excited. I can’t believe they called to collaborate with Robert and apparently a few others,” I’m still in shock.
“That’s so amazing. I knew you’d always make it far,” he smiles.
“Thanks. How’s it going with the Symphony?”
“Oh, it’s awesome. We’re practicing daily for our new set coming for Christmas. They’re saying we’ll be traveling, but I’m not sure where exactly we’re going. Apparently, the symphony has been invited to some places.”
“That’s wonderful, Elliot. I wish you so much success, you know, that right?”
“Melody?”
“Yes?”
“This might sound beyond crazy, but I need to ask you something, you can say No, I’ll understand.”
“Okay?” I’m worried.
“Um,” he seems nervous, “I’d like to ask for one last kiss?”
I just stare at him. Unsure what to say or even do. I’m tempted, hesitant, held back, and nervous. Once our lips touch, I might just give up on everything I believe, I might fall right back into him and that scares the shit out of me.
“I know, crazy. I’m sorry. I know we’ll never be a couple, and I know I’ll never be able to kiss you after tonight again, you’ll go your way, I’ll concentrate on my career, and I’ll miss you every day of my life,” I don’t even let him continue.
Our lips locked as I ease into him taking full control. I know it’s crazy. I’ve never believed in goodbye kisses, I always called them ridiculously stupid, but here I am giving Elliot the most passionate kiss I could muster. Seconds turn into minutes as we’re pressed against a wall of a busy street locking lips. The softer and tender touch of his tongue barely touching mine as we make out like teenagers in public. I’ve fallen right back into him. My heart beats a mile a minute and I realize this is my happy place. His hands are holding my back tight into him. He won’t let me go if I don’t ask him to. And I can’t. I can’t find the words to say No; I can’t find the strength to pull away from him. Another minute has gone by as we continue to kiss. Make it worth it, Melody.